Will my time EVER come?!
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Ok I'm clearly having a rough night and just need to vent. I feel like I have been jipped (sp?) out of this surgery so many times. My mom worked at ADP for 6 years with UHC and they covered it...but only if I was 18...then when I was 17 and 7 months she changed jobs to Key Payroll online and still has UHC but they dont cover it!!! Gah just my luck. Then 6 months ago she got a credit card for 20,000 but it is maxed out now cause she took alovely trip to Arizona....Then she refinanced the house and spent 20,000 on our kitchen alone (more than the cost of surgery) and normally she has great credit and could get financed for a surgery here in the USA but now her debt to income ratio is too high because of her new stupid southwest airlines credit cards. So basically I have been told oh yeah this will work...Siiikk! too many times.
I feel like I am so close yet so far. I have been researching this for 5 years now ever since They had that girl from wilson phillips on TV for the NWWLS commercial (if u live in WA im sure you know what I'm talking about). I just feel like my time is never going to come. And I have applied at ADP (the place my mom use to work, which I know for sure covers the surgery) for receptionist and admin jobs for over a year now and they just won't hire me.<br>I just wonder when my time to shine is going to come<br>Sorry to vent I just feel hopeles....and today I was crying and my mom told me "It's not my responsibility to pay for your stupid weight loss surgery...I didn't make you fat."
All I could think was uhm...maybe if I had some emotional stability when I was a child and didn't have an alcoholic father I'd have felt more loved and not needed food to comfort me. I know most of you bandsters on here are older than me and maybe are parents too....but it's very difficult when both of your parents were bombshells and popular in high school and never been overweight...I mean my mom simplifies it to "Why should I finance a surgery when you can't even pay your cell phone bill." I duno I just think she needs to take a step back and realize that spending $20,000 on new kitchen isn't as important as your daughters lifelong happiness, health and success.
Maybe I feel like it is owed to me because I truley feel like she should have provided more stability in my life. I rememebr beign in 3rd grade and beign called fat for the first time...and I didn't realize that I was different until then...I just know that if I saw my kids gettign chubby I'd enroll them in basketball or some form of fun exercise and have activites for them to make healthy Snacks....like celery and Peanut Butter with little raisens on them. I wouldn't wish beign 275 on my worst enemy....and just can't figure out why my mom didn't fight harder for my health when I was so little.