seminar If I could go back I would ask completely different question! How about you?

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

If I could go back I would ask the lady that came to talk to us after she had been very successful with the sleeve..

I would ask her....What was your lowest point? What made you decide to do the sleeve? What was the worst habit or junk food that you found was difficult for you to give up? How has your life changed since surgery? Would you recommend it to others? What did you eat as a staple in this program, because chocolate is not a staple? When did you start to feel different and getting the results you wanted?

Did you ever regret it? And so on and so on...

If you had the chance would you ask different questions now that you are succeeding compared to having that wide eyed awe staring at the before and after picture of that one who was there to encourage you.....

[Fit2btied 122]

If I could go back I would ask the lady that came to talk to us after she had been very successful with the sleeve..

I would ask her....What was your lowest point? What made you decide to do the sleeve? What was the worst habit or junk food that you found was difficult for you to give up? How has your life changed since surgery? Would you recommend it to others? What did you eat as a staple in this program' date=' because chocolate is not a staple? When did you start to feel different and getting the results you wanted?

Did you ever regret it? And so on and so on...

If you had the chance would you ask different questions now that you are succeeding compared to having that wide eyed awe staring at the before and after picture of that one who was there to encourage you.....[/quote']

Well I am set for surgery on Wednesday, but I feel that this forum answers those questions over and over. I feel like any questions that need answering are done so in volumes. I am very great full for this site!

[back2barb78 890]

RJ, I would think that it would be appropriate for those of us who are preop to ask you to answer some of those questions for us. From the looks of your before and after pictures, you have had success with your sleeve. Maybe you can answer them for some of us.

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

Well I am set for surgery on Wednesday, but I feel that this forum answers those questions over and over. I feel like any questions that need answering are done so in volumes. I am very great full for this site!

Hind sight is 20/20...That is what I am referring too....If I knew what I know now I would have been more prepared then I was....I spent 2 years researching VSG. I thought I was really prepared for what lay ahead....Personal experience goes a long way to answer some questions...I had the chance to talk one on one with a successful sleever. I did not know enough of the emotional or head issues...or even how to get used to your new sleeve or your new life....All was very scary....And to top it all off I had severe complications so the distress I dealt with I would have loved to have learned more possible problems that people deal with prior to surgery.....

When I was done and finally home I had so much zeal I shoved the correct answers in peoples faces...Thinking I was helping them...But it is so different when you go through it yourself...I had no idea what it was really like..But she would have had a really good idea..She had done it all!

I know this forum answers a lot of questions..I have learned a lot..But it does not compare to someone who is sitting right in front of you who personally went through a lot of the battles we faced or face now......I hope you understand better what I meant!

[StawberryBlond 31]

RJ,

What would be your recommendations for trying to prepare for the psychological issues that you mention?

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

Searching out a group...support group would be helpful...In my area we don't have one...And we were not allowed to go to the one where I had my sleeve done until the surgery was done. So even though I watched countless videos and talked to the pros where I was having the surgery..I was not prepared.....

I don't know anyone personally that has had weight-loss surgery. One night about a week before I left the hospital a woman peaked her head around my curtain and said.." I know you think this is never going to get better but I promise you it will." she slipped away as quietly as she came...I laid there thinking was she even real...And wow a sleever! I never saw her again...

That made me realize for the first time that this was my life now and I needed to make it or break it on my own...Yes I read and joined this forum and it gave me a lot of help....I did however have the nerve to think this won't happen to me or that won't happen to me...And it all happened to me..I was so close to death that the Doctors told my husband that they did not have much hope for me making it through it....

When I look back on that I think that preparing myself before surgery by detoxing was a good idea..I stopped a lot of bad habits before I even got close to the surgery...That part I would do again!

Don't give yourself the pleasure of thinking that you know what is going to happen and how you are going to DEAL with your sleeve. One persons experience is different then another's..One day at a time...one step at a time....one victory at a time....And remember who's life it is. And who is taking the risk.

There is your family to consider and their emotions will run high at times...Embrace their caring spirit and feed on it..There will be times when you will cry and no one will be able to help you except the ones that know you the most....

So before you even have the surgery commit to a life long change..Working at it day to day....Whether a slow loser or a fast loser don't put pressure on yourself to have yourself at goal in 3-5 months..It can take 2 years..

After a few months go by, your excited and scared that you have lost some weight and you are down a few sizes...Fear is the enemy here...We look at what we have accomplished and still do not see what we have done..How far we have come...And all the time we are dealing with our heads and it is playing games with us and we have to fix the reasons why we came to this point in our lives...

All the small changes that you will experience. Like the first time you cross your legs or fit into a airplane seat without a extension...All good! But you are still afraid of what lies ahead of you....where will you fit in and how will you change if you change at all..And you will change in some way..Everybody does who has great changes in their lives....

Some days I am so proud of myself I can't stand me..and at the same time scared to death about who I may or may not become....I am invisible to everyone who knew me before surgery. No one recognizes me at all...It is fun but sad at the same time...

There are so many scenarios that you read on here....Different experiences of the good the bad and ugly of it all.....

Learn to be patient. Don't expect perfection. And hit the scale with a sledge hammer and get weighed at the doctors office. Treat yourself to something nice like jewelry..never food! Take your time and enjoy each step you are making to make yourself a better and healthier you...Don't look at the sleeve as another diet..but as a program for life...And when you think that you failed when you make a slip up..it is not like all the failed diets...This is you and your life now...Tomorrow is a new day..

11 months out and I am learning more and more about myself and the issues that got me to this place...You have to learn to love yourself!

[Fit2btied 122]

Searching out a group...support group would be helpful...In my area we don't have one...And we were not allowed to go to the one where I had my sleeve done until the surgery was done. So even though I watched countless videos and talked to the pros where I was having the surgery..I was not prepared..... I don't know anyone personally that has had weight-loss surgery. One night about a week before I left the hospital a woman peaked her head around my curtain and said.." I know you think this is never going to get better but I promise you it will." she slipped away as quietly as she came...I laid there thinking was she even real...And wow a sleever! I never saw her again... That made me realize for the first time that this was my life now and I needed to make it or break it on my own...Yes I read and joined this forum and it gave me a lot of help....I did however have the nerve to think this won't happen to me or that won't happen to me...And it all happened to me..I was so close to death that the Doctors told my husband that they did not have much hope for me making it through it.... When I look back on that I think that preparing myself before surgery by detoxing was a good idea..I stopped a lot of bad habits before I even got close to the surgery...That part I would do again! Don't give yourself the pleasure of thinking that you know what is going to happen and how you are going to DEAL with your sleeve. One persons experience is different then another's..One day at a time...one step at a time....one victory at a time....And remember who's life it is. And who is taking the risk. There is your family to consider and their emotions will run high at times...Embrace their caring spirit and feed on it..There will be times when you will cry and no one will be able to help you except the ones that know you the most.... So before you even have the surgery commit to a life long change..Working at it day to day....Whether a slow loser or a fast loser don't put pressure on yourself to have yourself at goal in 3-5 months..It can take 2 years.. After a few months go by' date=' your excited and scared that you have lost some weight and you are down a few sizes...Fear is the enemy here...We look at what we have accomplished and still do not see what we have done..How far we have come...And all the time we are dealing with our heads and it is playing games with us and we have to fix the reasons why we came to this point in our lives... All the small changes that you will experience. Like the first time you cross your legs or fit into a airplane seat without a extension...All good! But you are still afraid of what lies ahead of you....where will you fit in and how will you change if you change at all..And you will change in some way..Everybody does who has great changes in their lives.... Some days I am so proud of myself I can't stand me..and at the same time scared to death about who I may or may not become....I am invisible to everyone who knew me before surgery. No one recognizes me at all...It is fun but sad at the same time... There are so many scenarios that you read on here....Different experiences of the good the bad and ugly of it all..... Learn to be patient. Don't expect perfection. And hit the scale with a sledge hammer and get weighed at the doctors office. Treat yourself to something nice like jewelry..never food! Take your time and enjoy each step you are making to make yourself a better and healthier you...Don't look at the sleeve as another diet..but as a program for life...And when you think that you failed when you make a slip up..it is not like all the failed diets...This is you and your life now...Tomorrow is a new day.. 11 months out and I am learning more and more about myself and the issues that got me to this place...You have to learn to love yourself![/quote']

Wonderful post!