Natural obsessiveness?

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Howdy vets. As some of you know, I'm going back to school to get my degree. After being out of school 27 years, going back is like facing every worst nightmare I ever had. It's scary. But the belief in myself I have now after losing all my weight is making me realize all things are possible....even college algebra (gulp).

My wife is a PHD and has worked in academics all her life...mostly in university settings and now for a medical school. She has 15 years of higher education compared to the 2 I'm about to undertake, so she has a good bit of experience to lend me. She told me last night that no matter how much information I may have forgotten since high school, that my "natural obsessiveness" would carry me through. WTF? Me?

Apparently...it took all that natural obsessiveness to lose the weight and get in shape like I did, and educate myself enough to be able to do so. According to her, I always had it, I just didn't know how to focus it on a given goal. And now that I do I can wield it any way I choose. Sound reasonable? Do any of y'all feel it took obsessiveness to get to your goal? And have you been able to redirect that same focus toward something else afterward?

[lsereno 2,525]

I know it helped me. I did a ton of research before deciding on the sleeve, including average weight lost, complications, healing time, post-op diet, whether my insurance covered it and more I've probably forgotten. Once I selected the operation, I did research on what I needed to do to get the operation through my insurance. Once approved, I followed the pre-op plan like a little robot. Post-op, I followed the plan to goal and then the guidelines for staying at goal. Sure I fall off the wagon, eat what I shouldn't. etc etc. but so far, that's the occasional issue.

I knew I needed this operation to lose weight because I tried every other reasonable option and couldn't get any of them to work for me. Once that part clicked, I obsessed about how to make this last chance effort work for me. And I'm still at it at goal. I don't feel confident that I would remain at goal without tracking and accountability.

Lynda

[gamergirl 4,609]

Speaking as someone with a ph.d., you know what the difference was between those of us who graduated, and those who quit?

Those of us who graduated didn't quit.

Really. That was it. Persistence. We put up with whatever BS, jumped through whatever hoops, dealt with inevitable delays and were like stubborn MULES that were NOT going to quit until we had it. The ones that quit lost patience. I don't think I was always intelligence, ability, or anything intellectual.

Persistence. Same thing that made you keep at it until you hit weight/fitness goals. How many guys like you quit on the weight a long time ago? But not you, right?

My first 3 years were no problem. Due to health, pregnancy, unsupportive spouse issues my last year took me four years.

Persistence. Good luck. You will do great.

[gamergirl 4,609]

Oops I just posted in the vet's forum! Sowwy!

[Fiddleman 4,376]

I would not worry about it too much. No wet noodle slaps for you! Your posts are often very enlightening and well thought out, very vet like. As a formality, you do have to wait until month 6 unfortunately to post here to this forum.

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

I am just glad to hear that my obsessive nature is natural.

So, the deal is that I tend to have a single minded focus on a goal. So the risk for me is always... what happens when that goal is obtained? This worked great for getting my educatino and career started, but for maintaining health it is something I need to watch. I am learning to have as a goal to just maintain.. just hang out comfortably in the ballpark of where I am at. Well, once I get plastics done anyway.

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Oops I just posted in the vet's forum! Sowwy!

I think it's fine. You contributed, that's what we need.

[futureloser 190]

Howdy vets. As some of you know' date=' I'm going back to school to get my degree. After being out of school 27 years, going back is like facing every worst nightmare I ever had. It's scary. But the belief in myself I have now after losing all my weight is making me realize all things are possible....even college algebra (gulp).

My wife is a PHD and has worked in academics all her life...mostly in university settings and now for a medical school. She has 15 years of higher education compared to the 2 I'm about to undertake, so she has a good bit of experience to lend me. She told me last night that no matter how much information I may have forgotten since high school, that my "natural obsessiveness" would carry me through. WTF? Me?

Apparently...it took all that natural obsessiveness to lose the weight and get in shape like I did, and educate myself enough to be able to do so. According to her, I always had it, I just didn't know how to focus it on a given goal. And now that I do I can wield it any way I choose. Sound reasonable? Do any of y'all feel it took obsessiveness to get to your goal? And have you been able to redirect that same focus toward something else afterward?[/quote']

BTB. I got my BA at 57. I had 60 credits through testing, actual classes, and a portfolio I submitted. I essentially had 2 years of going full time to finish. I was determined to do it in 2 yrs even though I was working in a pretty stressful position and had a family. I took 3-4 and sometimes 5 classes a term and ended up with 3.89 less than 2 yrs after I started. I went straight through 2 summers. If you want something bad enough and there is incentive built in, you can do anything!

[Ms skinniness 3,003]

BTB I can tell u that u do have the traits of being a bit obsessive! LOL I can also tell u that u are extremely intelligent and totally capable of earning a college degree. It is life changing. I stated back to college at 33 years old and finally got my Master degree in Counseling. I also have a BS in Psychology. I had to focus on one class at a time bc I had a fear of failure. I should clarify, I focused on 1 semester at a time. I look back and am amazed and proud of my accomplishments.

I is my professional opinion that u can do this. BTW I am basing my advice on past posts I have read from u. My saying is "just do it!"

[Fiddleman 4,376]

BTB - I have a college degree in mathematics and computer science. Education has shaped a lot of the hobbies and career choices I have made, but mostly indirectly.

One of my joys is finding clever ways to apply my analytical and mathematical mind to problems in software engineering, even though most folks would not do this and just satisfy "the requirements." It is strangely euphoric for me to do this and brings great satisfaction to keep my mind abstract; it keeps an otherwise mundane world of creating financial software interesting.

I find it "fun" to day dream about solutions to the great mathematical problems, especially application of applied mathematics to solve a highly theoretical problem like riemann hypothesis. Maybe someday I will find a solution based on wave mechanics and the way vibrations coincide at the molecular level with the zeros of the zeta function. Nobody here knows what I am talking about, but I find it a very interesting thing to Daydream about abstractly, both visually and musically. I thank my degree for the intellectual tools to do this.

I am considering going back to school for two reasons at age 40. 1. To get an MBA and 2. To get a degree in video game design and development. I love video games from a user experience and design perspective and would love to start my own business creating a new genre of games that are instantly addicting, yet elegantly complex in design once you get past the simplicity of user experience. Think angry birds and mind craft. I want to direct a bright and motivated set of software engineers, artists and writers to design, develop and release a game that will change the video game industry by making huge ripples in a vastly saturated market. Again, think angry birds and mind craft.

And then I am going to throw it all away once I retire and go to violin making school. It has always been a dream of mine to build master violins that are designed so well they are indistinguishable in sound quality and dynamics from the great strads.

I would start now, but it will not pay the bills and I need a lot of training and practice to both start and master the craft. I do have an advantage of both playing the violin for about 25 years and am quite good at it. I also have a thorough understanding of how great sound acoustics is produced from a standpoint of wave mechanics and dynamic systems. Creating sound and music artificially through computer programming is another one of my hobbies I started in college. It was my thesis in one of the programs I completed.

Pretty complex set of goals right? Why would I consider more education, especially at the mid point of my life? Well because I love to learn and have a passion about it. Every day is a new day to learn. It keeps life interesting and we are only limited by the self Imposed boundaries we place on our minds. I am definitely naturally obsessive about a lot of things. fitness is my latest obsession.

Anyways, those are my dreams and they require more education. Some of this just cannot be learned from the Internet or from books you can buy from Amazon. Even if it were possible to educate in this manner, no one will take you seriously in a field without a piece of paper from a college. That is just the way the cookie crumbles.

You will do great in college, especially with your phd wife to motivate you. It will be hard work, but worth it. There will be times when you want to say hell with it and give up. However, I know you have an Iron will to get through the toughest challenges. After all, you lost your weight, can run 1/2 marathons and finish top in your age bracket after coming from a pre-WLS state of health. If that doesn't scream perseverance and drive, I do not know what does.

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Thanks everyone.

Ms Skinniness....my wife's degree is also in psychology so when you say you see traits of obsessiveness in me, as she does, I know it's coming from a place of training and education...and not just someone's uninformed opinion. And while I do enjoy the occasional battle of wits with my psycologist wife, I can never quite tell if I'm winning or she's playing shrink mind games with me. But it does motivate me to stay on my intellectual toes.

Fiddle...you and my wife would be fast friends. If there is anything she loves more than analytical deep thought...it's music (and fitness).

I'm currently in step 1 of ??? .....studying to retake the SAT. Wow, I didn't realize how much I had forgotten from high school.

[Nicolanz 1,484]

Woohoo! How exciting that your going back to school!! I went back after 10 years and like you, I was nervous ......terrified actually! I absolutely love it though. As a matter of fact, I don't want it to end! I've always been obsessive but I find that with me getting healthy, I have more excitement for life and less fear. You'll do great!

[Ms skinniness 3,003]

Thanks everyone.

Ms Skinniness....my wife's degree is also in psychology so when you say you see traits of obsessiveness in me, as she does, I know it's coming from a place of training and education...and not just someone's uninformed opinion. And while I do enjoy the occasional battle of wits with my phsycologist wife, I can never quite tell if I'm winning or she's playing shrink mind games with me. But it does motivate me to stay on my intellectual toes.

Fiddle...you and my wife would be fast friends. If there is anything she loves more than analytical deep thought...it's music (and fitness).

I'm currently in step 1 of ??? .....studying to retake the SAT. Wow, I didn't realize how much I had forgotten from high school.

This is so funny.....my husband and I do the same thing too.....I love challenging him to think in different ways.....but he is a stubborn guy and does come around in due time...BTB you are doing fantastic and if you can ROCK your sleeve and make all the changes in your life regarding eating, you can definitely get a degree. It's also fun and stimulates you in so many different ways....Hope to hear your doing it. BTW LilMissDiva returned to get a degree in nutrition too......

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Woohoo! How exciting that your going back to school!! I went back after 10 years and like you, I was nervous ......terrified actually! I absolutely love it though. As a matter of fact, I don't want it to end! I've always been obsessive but I find that with me getting healthy, I have more excitement for life and less fear. You'll do great!

Nicole...I think I remember you saying you were getting your nursing degree...right? I know you're not far from me, where are you going to school? Looks like I'll be going to Lone Star Community College in Tomball.

[Nicolanz 1,484]

I'll be there next semester hopefully!! I couldn't start the nursing program this semester so I'm going to apply again next semester. Right now I'm at cyfair.