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I look at my before pics and I look in the mirror now, and I don't see a difference.

Classic case of your brain refusing to get with the program and see reality...

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Don't let my profile pic fool you. Sadly, this was taken at the height of my loss and fitness, I am probably at least 25 lbs heavier now and about as fit as a veal. I would change the photo if I had access to my personal computer. I still wear a pre-op work out tee to the gym, and it doesn't even look foollishly large. I look at photos of my face before and now and see only the slightest of changes. Still round.

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Bah! I'm not fooled. You started out just under 300 and now your around or just under 190! That's 100 pounds! Whether all of that came before or after surgery really doesn't matter, you still get credit (I'm taking credit for every pound of loss that I've managed to hang onto)! That's a big deal! And, I have to point out (with no criticism or malice) that the shirt in your before pick was a bit snug, so if you're wearing the same size shirt to the gym (and let's face it, big girls and "used to be big girls" tend to prefer roomier tops to camoflauge all of our perceived flaws... I assume that's not just me), so I wouldn't imagine it would look foolishly large (although it's entirely possible that it could be, but you can't see it and your workout partners might not tell you). My next point is this: I'm 5'8" I weighed 349 at my heaviest. I just donated a workout shirt that I wore at that weight almost more because I have better stuff now than it's too big. I can still wear it without it looking "foolishly large". So, that's a span of about 80 pounds that I was able to reasonably wear the same shirt.

You have come a really long way, give yourself credit for that. So you're 25 pounds up, (25, not 100) after a really traumatic period in your life. It happens to most of us at some point or other. I had lost 115 pounds between 2009 and 2011 and then my mother in law was in ICU for 2 weeks, so we spent every night in the hospital since we were out of towners and didn't have to work. Every day, we went to a greasy spoon for Breakfast (in Oklahoma, so their baseline for plentiful healthy food choices is pretty darn low, not that it really would have mattered). I gained a little more than a pound a day that trip and never got my motivation back after that until I decided it was time for surgery. It's unbelievably hard to make good food and fitness choices when you're exhausted and under pressure and stress. You've lost it before, you can do it again! Might take a little more planning and dedication this time, but you sure as heck can do it! After reading your info on your profile page, though, I would consider investigating any health issues that might be interfering with your efforts to lose weight. Standard culprits: sleep disorders, depression, pain, thyroid, insulin resistance/diabetes/PCOS, medication interactions and side effects. I don't even know how many things could interfere, it feels like it's a never-ending list. For me, my biggest barriers were a sleep disorder, pain (let's face it, it hurts like hell to weigh over 300pounds, and that's a major motivator to keep your butt velcro'd to the couch!), and depression (dysthymia, really - pretty minor, but still a pretty significant factor in my lack of motivation to exercise and make good food choices). After I really started getting into my health issues, as minor as they were, I learned that I actually wasn't lazy! I truly thought I was a lazy person because I never wanted to do anything, but it turns out that I was exhausted from an undiagnosed sleep disorder. Now that I'm dealing with that, and have found an antidepressant that seems to be more effective (and to be honest, I'm still not certain that the dysthymia diagnosis wasn't actually misdiagnosed symptoms of my sleep disorder, but I'm sticking with my med while I move through the weight loss phase and into maintenance before I start testing coming off of it).

Anyway, I digress... I just want to urge you to go easy on yourself and take care of yourself. It sounds like you've been doing everything you can think of to keep moving toward your goal. You are working hard and deserve success, you will find the right combination. Best of luck to you as you keep working hard. I wish you all the success and support you could hope for! (and I apologize for my diarrhea of the fingertips... I just started on a stimulant... I think I took it too late in the day or I probably should have just forced myself to bed, like, 6 hours ago. Tomorrow should be fun...)

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this website still doesn't show my body' date=' none of the women in my search have pronounced lower stomach pooches. but, it does give me something to work toward, when I put in my goal weight and saw how cute it looks![/quote']

Perhaps you should send your pic n? It's great when they have different body types in there so more people can relate.

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Plastic surgeon told me that formerly obese are more prone to swelling after plastics because we still have larger vessels etc. She said she sees with her own eyes that internally the formerly obese just have more " insides".

It is false that a lifetime of carrying a bunch of extra weight makes your bones stronger and denser?

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I just got around to reading this thread and I want to thank you for posting that website link!! I look in the mirror and sometimes do not recognize myself. 123# less. But for some reason I still think I am still out of proportion. Now I know I am not!! The 5'9" 190 girls all look great. And that's me, too!! How exciting!! I sometimes wonder when my best will be good enough? We are so hard on ourselves.

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It is false that a lifetime of carrying a bunch of extra weight makes your bones stronger and denser?

I know it seems counterintuitive, but when we have been obese (BMI of 30 or greater), it actually lowers bone mineral density and puts us at a higher risk for osteoporosis. This wasn't always what was believed but it's what more recent studies are showing. I only know this bc I'm a medical editor and was just working on an article on this topic--I was shocked!

http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/721071

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Plastic surgeon told me that formerly obese are more prone to swelling after plastics because we still have larger vessels etc. She said she sees with her own eyes that internally the formerly obese just have more " insides".

That makes sense--plus we can't lose fat cells once we have them--they just get smaller (sort of deflated).

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That makes sense--plus we can't lose fat cells once we have them--they just get smaller (sort of deflated).

And that is why I am such an advocate for plastics + Lipo to finish off our journeys, it isn't cosmetic surgery, it's reconstructive and just putting us on an even playing field with the NFs (Never Fats)

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I know it seems counterintuitive, but when we have been obese (BMI of 30 or greater), it actually lowers bone mineral density and puts us at a higher risk for osteoporosis. This wasn't always what was believed but it's what more recent studies are showing. I only know this bc I'm a medical editor and was just working on an article on this topic--I was shocked!

http://www.medscape....warticle/721071

Conventional wisdom struck down again! Very interesting.

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And that is why I am such an advocate for plastics + Lipo to finish off our journeys, it isn't cosmetic surgery, it's reconstructive and just putting us on an even playing field with the NFs (Never Fats)

Completely agree when necessary (not referring to medically necessary due to rashes or whatever, but when the patient feels it's necessary)

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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