Disappointed in myself...

[zenandnow 514]

Blegh. Finally hit under 200 lbs, went on vacation this week, and what do I do? Fall off the wagon! Feeling pretty disappointed in myself. I know better than this, but I went & hit the trifecta: slider foods, not tracking, and grazing!

Trying hard to get back on track today and not beat myself up about it, but it's hard. I'm used to self-sabotaging (kind of wondering if that's behind all this - I typically panic when I diet & get close to 200, self-sabotage, then give up. Only difference here is I broke 200 and am at 198). Also used to that old habit of berating myself for not being able to follow through on changing my habits, self-criticizing - you know the drill. All the mean things we say to ourselves.

Trying to think of some of the positive things I can take from this. Like - I learned that I feel crappy when I eat carbs and 'normal' when I eat Protein. I learned that although I can definitely eat a lot of carb-y slider foods, they definitely do not process well through my system, and being stopped up is not fun. I also learned that I do better when I am accountable; when no one is looking I get sneaky. Sneaky is not good. Sneaky makes me depressed and lonely and fat.

So....I am tracking on MFP again after largely ignoring it for 4 days. (I am zenandnow23 on MFP if you want to friend me and kick my a** in gear.)

I'm going to have my Premier shakes and Water today & try to get myself back in the protein mindset. In other words, DETOX!!

And I am going to *try* not to be mean to myself for not doing so great over the past few days...but I gotta admit, I'm feeling pretty down.

[gmanbat 5,889]

You fell off the wagon but the wagon is not going in circles. You are learning, learning leads to power. I am proud of how you are thinking this through. I predict you success!

[LifetimeLoser 208]

I read something somewhere...I'm sorry I can't remember where, but it was basically saying that the more weight we lose...our bodies will help us sabotage ourselves. We crave certain things (carbs and fat), are more hungry, get really lethargic.

It is okay to feel disappointed, but pick yourself up and move on which seems like what you are doing. So great!

[No game 14,437]

My wagon has gotten a flat tire more than once girlie! Vacations they are hard to rebound from sometimes! the last one took me a good week (or two) of beating back cravings.

Ok the most important thing I see here is the SNEAKY eater! That was (is) me, how I deal. With it now is talk about it. I throw a bright light on it by telling my husband that the behavior is creeping up again when it does... I don't know just telling someone helps, he never thought this surgery would work for me because ad he said

"But Laura you never eat" honesty to him has been very freeing...

[gmanbat 5,889]

My wagon has gotten a flat tire more than once girlie! Vacations they are hard to rebound from sometimes! the last one took me a good week (or two) of beating back cravings.

Ok the most important thing I see here is the SNEAKY eater! That was (is) me, how I deal. With it now is talk about it. I throw a bright light on it by telling my husband that the behavior is creeping up again when it does... I don't know just telling someone helps, he never thought this surgery would work for me because ad he said

"But Laura you never eat" honesty to him has been very freeing...

By golly, that is the same thing I thought about my wife! For the life of me I could not imagine how she gained so much weight. She ate like a bird in my mind. Maybe I compared her eating to the black hole absorption that was my appetite. She told me later that she ate sweets non-stop.

The gaps in a husband's awareness you could drive a semi through!

[No game 14,437]

By golly' date=' that is the same thing I thought about my wife! For the life of me I could not imagine how she gained so much weight. She ate like a bird in my mind. Maybe I compared her eating to the black hole absobtion that was my appetite. She told me later that she ate sweets non-stop.

The gaps in a husband's awareness you could drive a semi through![/quote']

Hehe... All the times when the last of something would be eaten and the kids and my husband would accuse each other! Never even thinking it was me!

**Laura looking very innocent**

[Kaj 88]

Blegh. Finally hit under 200 lbs, went on vacation this week, and what do I do? Fall off the wagon! Feeling pretty disappointed in myself. I know better than this, but I went & hit the trifecta: slider foods, not tracking, and grazing!

Trying hard to get back on track today and not beat myself up about it, but it's hard. I'm used to self-sabotaging (kind of wondering if that's behind all this - I typically panic when I diet & get close to 200, self-sabotage, then give up. Only difference here is I broke 200 and am at 198). Also used to that old habit of berating myself for not being able to follow through on changing my habits, self-criticizing - you know the drill. All the mean things we say to ourselves.

Trying to think of some of the positive things I can take from this. Like - I learned that I feel crappy when I eat carbs and 'normal' when I eat Protein. I learned that although I can definitely eat a lot of carb-y slider foods, they definitely do not process well through my system, and being stopped up is not fun. I also learned that I do better when I am accountable; when no one is looking I get sneaky. Sneaky is not good. Sneaky makes me depressed and lonely and fat.

So....I am tracking on MFP again after largely ignoring it for 4 days. (I am zenandnow23 on MFP if you want to friend me and kick my a** in gear.)

I'm going to have my Premier shakes and Water today & try to get myself back in the Protein mindset. In other words, DETOX!!

And I am going to *try* not to be mean to myself for not doing so great over the past few days...but I gotta admit, I'm feeling pretty down.

It's not how many times you fall off the horse that counts, what matters is how many times you get back on. So good for you for picking yourself up, dusting yourself off and getting back to basics. You got this!!

[gamergirl 4,609]

By golly' date=' that is the same thing I thought about my wife! For the life of me I could not imagine how she gained so much weight. She ate like a bird in my mind. Maybe I compared her eating to the black hole absorption that was my appetite. She told me later that she ate sweets non-stop.

The gaps in a husband's awareness you could drive a semi through![/quote']

Omg my husband was the same way! I could not understand how he weighed what he did because he barely ate. Mmm hmm. He did. When I wasn't home. Cakes. Donuts. Crap.

Me on the other hand, knowing I'd have to confess I ate junk is what kept me on the straight and narrow. If I was going to eat junk I was pretty shameless about it

[FRED1977 186]

It's just normal to fall off the wagon every now and then , just get back on it. Your going to do just fine/. Don't let the scale rule your emotions.

[gamergirl 4,609]

I really love how you did focus on the things you learned. That's making the best of a not-perfect situation, and you did that. So yeah, don't be hard on yourself

[Aline728 301]

Blegh. Finally hit under 200 lbs' date=' went on vacation this week, and what do I do? Fall off the wagon! Feeling pretty disappointed in myself. I know better than this, but I went & hit the trifecta: slider foods, not tracking, and grazing!

Trying hard to get back on track today and not beat myself up about it, but it's hard. I'm used to self-sabotaging (kind of wondering if that's behind all this - I typically panic when I diet & get close to 200, self-sabotage, then give up. Only difference here is I broke 200 and am at 198). Also used to that old habit of berating myself for not being able to follow through on changing my habits, self-criticizing - you know the drill. All the mean things we say to ourselves.

Trying to think of some of the positive things I can take from this. Like - I learned that I feel crappy when I eat carbs and 'normal' when I eat Protein. I learned that although I can definitely eat a lot of carb-y slider foods, they definitely do not process well through my system, and being stopped up is not fun. I also learned that I do better when I am accountable; when no one is looking I get sneaky. Sneaky is not good. Sneaky makes me depressed and lonely and fat.

So....I am tracking on MFP again after largely ignoring it for 4 days. (I am zenandnow23 on MFP if you want to friend me and kick my a** in gear.)

I'm going to have my Premier shakes and Water today & try to get myself back in the Protein mindset. In other words, DETOX!!

And I am going to *try* not to be mean to myself for not doing so great over the past few days...but I gotta admit, I'm feeling pretty down.[/quote']

Amazing way to look at things..always remember we are all learning, and will have slips...picking oneself up without the Guilt and starting over is the key...

[zenandnow 514]

Amazing way to look at things..always remember we are all learning' date=' and will have slips...picking oneself up without the Guilt and starting over is the key...[/quote']

You got it, Aline! Since then I've gotten back on track & managed to lose a few more pounds. It's really helped a lot to have the support of folks here, and the guidance of the vets. Awesome people, and I feel so grateful I found this forum!!

[BKLYNgal87 503]

Zen you are always encouraging me on MFP and it's my turn!

Get back on the horse and don't dwell on the set backs! We all have them at some point. Just keep pushing forward toward goal and you'll get there as long as long as you keep going in the right direction and keep positive.

[zenandnow 514]

Zen you are always encouraging me on MFP and it's my turn!

Get back on the horse and don't dwell on the set backs! We all have them at some point. Just keep pushing forward toward goal and you'll get there as long as long as you keep going in the right direction and keep positive.

Thanks BKLYNgal!! It helps to be amongst friends!!

[maharet111 544]

In our lifetime we make a thousand mistakes. You are learning from them and adapting your behaviors so you don't make them again. The picture I am posting makes me laugh because it is so true, but we don't always recognize what success looks like.