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My how things change



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So my support person who was going to accompany me to my surgery chickened out today. She's too afraid to go to Mexico and to be there for me. She's been one of my closest friends for years, and has been my confidant and my supporter in moving forward with this. I'm feeling the full gamut of emotions. Frankly I'm disappointed. I'm sad. This is my time! This is my new life. I don't know who will be in my life as I change. I'm not sure what kind of crap I'm going to put up with in my new life. This is a test, this is only a test. One thing is for certain....I'm ready for my surgery. I'm flying out Monday, no matter what, and I have no fears of going alone. I travel for work all the time. This is another trip, but it's for me, and it's not a spur of the moment selfish decision. It was a decision made with the support of my husband and my (now not) support person. It's just a glitch in the system. I'm not eating over it, I'm shedding a few tears is all. This is my rant. My first topic, and my first rant. Deep breaths.

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I had my surgery last Friday in Mexico. Though I did have my husband with me, most other people were alone. You CAN do this! Just a bump in the road to success....

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If I didn't have so much work this week, I would go with you SeaGirl! I'm not even kidding. I was just in Mexico for mine and I would love to accompany you now that your "confi-don't" has bailed. I can tell you this: I was there by myself and was absolutely fine. Plus, I positively relished the alone time at the hotel. Be glad that you won't have to take care of your friend while you're there (as it sounds from your post, you would have had to).

If you haven't already, join the 2013 Mexico Sleevers group on Facebook and post throughout your surgery experience. You will find tons of support there!

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I went to Mexico by myself and I had never flown before nor had I ever left the country. I did fine! You can do this!

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You will find out who and who is not a real friend. Good luck to you. I admire your courage for taking this step for you. You will love your sleeve!

Good luck and congrats! I am willing to bet you are an awesome friend and people are lucky to have you!

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If anyone deserves to rant its you. I can imagine how very disappointing that has to be. I'm sorry you're having to experience it. Its just a bump in your path though. Although its wonderful to have a support person there you will be fine on your own. My husband was with me throughout my surgery and hospital stay. I honestly don't remember him though, except for constantly spooning ice chips in my mouth (God bless him for that). It'll pass quickly and you'll soon be back home and on rhe mend.

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As angry as you are...and boy you have a right to be. Don't ditch your friendship or be upset too long over this. Your friend may have just had reality set in that...wow, she's going and I'm scared/worried about/etc her.

This reminds me of the posts where people talk about how their spouse was supportive until it got "real". You never know, she may come around. Just accept that either way you are going to move forward and if this is the only slight (while yes a big one), the friendship may be worth saving.

Now, I say this as someone who does not believe people have a right to inject their "issues/stuff" on others. Does she have her own weight issues? Could it be a bit of envy on her part that you are fortunate enough to be able to take this trip/get the surgery?

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    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
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      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
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