Anyone with little babies?

[Mrs.FullerRN 189]

I have 7,2 and 2 month old daughters. Baby will be a few months older when I have surgery but I always question if I'm doing the right thing by them. I don't want them growing up with a weight obsessed mom. My 7 year old the other day said "soon you will be able to wear pretty outfits instead of yoga pants, aren't you glad about that?" ugh I didn't know such a little person could have any idea that I HATE what I wear most of the time. Just wondering if anyone else has small children and how they are reacting to surgery?

[Nate74 45]

I have 2 daughters 9 and 3 and my oldest thinks it's great. She talks about how she can sit next to me in my recliner now. We do a lot more outdoor fun stuff. We went to a parade on Saturday and walked all over the place lot's of it with her on mine or my friends shoulders. I forgot to mention my wife had the surgery as well. I'm at goal and my wife is 15lbs from it. I think the effect it has had on our kids has been positive. We all eat better now. we sometimes eat different things from the kids but the little one wants what we have a lot so she has become a fan of catfish that i made from a recipe i found online along with my oldest. They have always liked yogurt so we just buy different kinds but overall i think it has been a good thing for our whole family. I think the 7 year old will see how happier you will be and look at it as positive and the two younger ones will know you as the skinnier you and won't know any different. If you think about it by getting healthier your setting an example that will not only benefit you but them as well by eating healthier and being happier by being able to have more energy and feel better about yourself will inspire them in the long run.

[clk 3,519]

I agree with the above. My twins were nearly three when I had surgery and my stepkids ranged in age from 11-20 years old (four of them are girls). The impact on all of them has been bigger than I thought. In fairness, my stepkids do not live with me, but seeing me shed weight in a way other than the extreme diets their mom does has been very positive for the girls. They would emulate their mother and simply skip meals over a perceived need to lose weight. Now their approach is more balanced. I can't help them all - I have four stepdaughters and one of them has battled anorexia (and other equally serious issues like drug addiction) for the past five years.

The huge impact is on my kids and how I raise them. My children eat a very healthy and balanced diet. We do not follow the clean your plate rule; we eat until we're no longer hungry. Just that one change is huge. My kids don't eat from boredom and we're all more active.

They do not remember big me. They sometimes know that the larger lady in older photos is me but they forget just as often. Their mom does not look like that.

Furthermore, while it's still sometimes a struggle for me to be nice to myself, I am not raising my kids to look in the mirror and declare themselves fat or unattractive. We're trying very hard in this house not to put too much emphasis on size or weight. We focus on healthy choices and moderation. My kids know cake isn't a very healthy choice, but they also know that if they don't eat it every day, it's okay to enjoy it sometimes. Too many moms I run into on the playground these days wonder why their kids binge on candy and soda when they get the chance - but they told their kids those foods were bad and forbid them from being in the house. Well, you have to find a balance here and one extreme is just as damaging as the other.

The only thing I'd be wary of is the portion sizes with your seven year old. Kids are very observant. What you don't want is for them to think that it's normal for everyone to eat a few bites or spoonfuls of food and declare themselves full. My one stepdaughter has a number of issues, but a huge factor in her body image problems is due to her mom's constant cycle of failed diets, coupled with continually putting herself down for not achieving her goals. Every one of those four girls has at times completely blasted their bodies and told me how fat they are. And every one of them is in truth, very thin. Do not ever underestimate the power you have over how your children feel about their bodies. You cannot control it all, but being mindful of what you do and what you say is incredibly important.

Best of luck. Your kids will benefit from this as you become a healthier and more active person. I can actually play with my kids and chase them...I'm not just huffing and waddling behind them hollering at them to slow down for Mommy anymore.

~Cheri