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Feeling Discouraged..... :(



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I haven't been on much the past month because of being so busy and finally have a fill with restriction thinking things were turning around.

Well I still have restriction and would not want more then what I have. I can eat about 1 cup of food at a time except when it comes to meat or bread. If meat or bread is involved then I can eat no more then 4 bites if I am lucky and usually end up in trouble after 2 bites. I had my last fill on 12/15 and started that day at 257. I got down to 253 which I was happy with by the end of the second week post fill. Well yesterday I was 256 and today I am 259. This really sucks. I am not over eatting and being good considering what time of year it is.

My husband and friend both think I may not be eatting enough food. But I am eatting what I can and am not going hungry. I eat 3 meals a day and a glass of skim milk at bedtime with my meds.

I have some health problems that effect my muscles so I have to take it slow with excersise. I excersised on Thursday and was in so much pain on Friday I could not even go to work. I do streching and have been gradually increasing more and more all the time. But it's not working.

I need help. Am I failing with the band? I was down 19 1/2 lbs from my highest and now im back up 6. What the heck is going on?

Any suggestions or advice is sooooooooo needed right now.

I have given up so much of my favorit foods, french fries, Ice cream, Milk shakes, SODA and yet I am still stuck in a rut.

I have an appointment for a fill in 3 week but I dont want more of a fill. I already PB and slimm or whatever it is called on a daily basis. I am keeping my appointment with the Dr to find out what he thinks.

In the mean time help please!!!!!!!!:) :mad: :help:

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I know how you feel, although I don't have restriction yet I haven't lost hardly any thing since my surgery in April. It sounds like to me that you are over filled. Good idea to speak with your doc, maybe you aren't eating enough calories. Good luck and I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.

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Shell, from the little bit you've said, I think you might still be overeating. Most bandsters, with good restriction, only eat about 1/2 c of food at a meal...sometimes, even less. For example, I drink tea only for Breakfast...I'm tighter in the am, so that's it for Breakfast. And bread? ! No way, no how. Bread is just glorified sugar...you don't need it for anything. Also, PBing or sliming isn't necessarily an indicator that you're too tight. It could be that you're not chewing well enough, taking small enough bites, etc. For me, ONE bite of bread has me stuck...and if the meat isn't small enough, I'll have trouble with it, too.

Try tracking your calories for a few days. I do NOT believe in the "starvation mode." I think it's an excuse to eat more. If you consistently eat less than your body needs, you WILL lose weight. But you do need to make sure that ALL of your calories are nutrient dense, with Protein and veggies first.

Then, again, you might be too tight if you're resorting to soft foods. Being too tight will slow the weight loss, too, because when you drink your calories or go to soft foods, they usually tend to have more calories and not stay with you as long...so you eat more.

Beyond that, try staying off the scales for a while. Follow the bandster guidelines, drink plenty of Water, get what exercise you can...the weight will come off. But as women, we can retain a LOT of Water, so if you let the scale fluctuations get to you, they'll drive you a bit crazy.

Cindy

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Actually, the "amount" bandsters eat seems to vary, but really you are doing well if you are eating a cup to a cup and a half at a time of healthy food. A serving of meat is 3 oz (about the size of a deck of cards), 1/2 cup of veggies, and then maybe a carb or starch if you have room after you get the meat and veggies in.

If you can't eat meat, how are you getting your protien in? What are your meals like? I do think it's possible that you aren't eating enough. That may add to the muscle condition that you have. Yes, if you eat less than your body needs, you will lose weight, but a good portion of it will be muscle, and that's never good.

Most of the health sites out there say that women should eat between 1200 to 1500 calories a day, and most doctors I've talked to say certainly not less than 1000 calories a day. Fitday.com is a great site for counting calories and tracking your intake.

Believe me, I understand your frustration. I went through a period where I was too tight, and nearly anything solid made me PB, and I wasn't losing any weight. I was living on Soup. I got just a teeny, tiny unfil, and lost 5 or 10 lbs right away.

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If you can't eat meat, how are you getting your protien in? What are your meals like? I do think it's possible that you aren't eating enough. That may add to the muscle condition that you have. Yes, if you eat less than your body needs, you will lose weight, but a good portion of it will be muscle, and that's never good.

Most of the health sites out there say that women should eat between 1200 to 1500 calories a day, and most doctors I've talked to say certainly not less than 1000 calories a day. Fitday.com is a great site for counting calories and tracking your intake.

Believe me, I understand your frustration. I went through a period where I was too tight, and nearly anything solid made me PB, and I wasn't losing any weight. I was living on Soup. I got just a teeny, tiny unfil, and lost 5 or 10 lbs right away.

If you're taking in enough Protein, even IF your calories are very low, you won't lose muscle mass. You can also insure that you don't lose muscle by exercising. :)

Most of the "health" site guidelines are based upon FDA guidelines. FDA guidelines are wrong. Remember that for years and years the FDA recommended that our diets be primarily carbs. It's just recently changed to a focus on the "5 fruits/vegetables" per day.

As for what most doctors recommend..if they're not obesity docs, then they're just following the FDA guidelines, too. I *should* be able to eat 3000-3500 cal/day to MAINTAIN my weight. I weigh 178 lbs and I'm very active (workout with a personal trainer 3-4x/week, karate 2-3x/week). And yet, I eat about 800-1000 cal/day. So you'd think that I'd be losing 4-5 lbs PER week if you're relying on formulas. I wish. LOL Instead, I'm losing about a lb/week.

You just CAN'T rely on "shoulds" when you're trying to lose weight. Telling yourself that you "should" eat between 1000-1200 cal/day is just an excuse to eat more. Instead, focus on eating your *solid* Protein and veggies, eating only when you're physically hungry, and stopping when you're satisfied. If you follow the bandster rules and you're still not losing weight, it's time for another fill. It's not rocket science, it doesn't follow "formulas."

And no, being TOO tight doesn't help because then you resort to foods like soup. Soup can be "sneakily" high in calories, it's usually high in salt, and because it runs right through the band, you don't stay full very long...so you eat more. Essentially, when you eat soft foods, you're bypassing the band completely.

Cindy

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Shell, from the little bit you've said, I think you might still be overeating. Most bandsters, with good restriction, only eat about 1/2 c of food at a meal...sometimes, even less. For example, I drink tea only for breakfast...I'm tighter in the am, so that's it for breakfast. And bread? ! No way, no how. Bread is just glorified sugar...you don't need it for anything. Also, PBing or sliming isn't necessarily an indicator that you're too tight. It could be that you're not chewing well enough, taking small enough bites, etc. For me, ONE bite of bread has me stuck...and if the meat isn't small enough, I'll have trouble with it, too.

Cindy

Wow, thanks for the insight Cindy. I have been wondering what the norm is for bandsters. I definitly need more fill. Thank goodness I am going in for one 1/13/07. Hopefully I will have some restriction. :rolleyes

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Cindy - I don't know where you got your information from, but if you stick around this site long enough you will see the norm for bansters is about 1 cup of food at a meal. Thats what most of our band doctors recommend. And just because you don't believe in the starvation mode doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Our bodies all work in different ways and I have seen numerous posts from members here stating that they increased their weight loss dramatical just from upping their calories. It's not an excuse to eat more. Different things work for different people because we are all different.

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shell- I mentioned to my surgeon this week I do fine or Im stuck in the first 4 bites. He wanted me to change up the order. Eat salad, veggie, meat and go around my plate taking bites in that order. He said that would help with getting the meat thru the band. Meat chewed is still tougher than salad and veggies chewed. He told me that for some bandsters eating only the Protein doesnt work; for weight loss, for overall living with the band.

Good Luck

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Heather, I've been "around" this site for well over a year now. I do know what people say they eat...in addition to reading threads concerning being a slow loser, not losing at all, etc. The typical bandster portion is usually 1/2 to 1 cup/meal. If someone routinely eats 1 cup/meal, that's on the high side. It's not necessarily too much for *that* person...it depends on whether or not they're losing weight. Since shell isn't losing weight, I said that I think she might be overeating. I also mentioned that it might be being too tight...I'm really just guessing based on very limited information.

Believing in the starvation mode also doesn't prove that it *does* exist. That argument goes both ways. Upping calories and then seeing a "dramatic" weight loss isn't proof of anything. It may have been coincidental and the low calories UP TO that point are really the reason for the weight loss. ANY time someone loses several pounds in one week, it's either Water weight, or simply the scale finally *showing* what's been happening for several weeks.

Again, that's the math. To lose 1 lb, you have take in or use 3500 calories less than what you need. So when anyone loses 6 lbs in one week (as an example for a "dramatic" weight loss), that means having a calorie deficit of 3000 cals PER DAY. Unless you're running a marathon, that's just not possible.

It's also not possible that our bodies somehow "switch" biochemical pathways in order to store calories. Or the reverse...that somehow, because you've upped your calories, you miraculously begin to burn more. Now, maybe by eating more, the person is snacking less...or feeling more energetic, so moving more. Whatever. But if you could run a controlled experiment in which everything else is the same, eating LESS calories vs more would show the greatest weight loss.

You might want to think that we're all different, but unless you have a medical condition, we're all pretty much the same when it comes to biochemistry.

You'll believe what you want to believe...as will I.

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Heather, I wanted to mention one more thing. Sometimes, getting banded means you really have to "let go" of some of your past ideas about weight loss. I used to believe in the starvation mode, too...otherwise, how could I explain the inability to lose weight for so many years? I really didn't *think* that I ate too much. But obviously, somewhere along the way, I WAS taking in too many calories. I used to believe that my genetic "predisposition" to obesity (EVERY female in my very large extended family is obese...mom, aunts, cousins, etc) was to blame.

With the band, I've finally learned to accept that it's calories in/calories out. It's not necessarily what I *want* to believe, but the proof is "in the pudding." I've been banded almost a year and I've lost 80+ lbs...I'm 15-20 from my goal.

I'm truly NOT trying to be offensive or condescending, but you've mentioned that, since banding in April, you've lost 20 lbs, so maybe your current way of thinking is NOT helping you?

Cindy

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I've only lost 20lbs because among other things I have been seriously ill, and have had a port revision and have only had 2 fills. A lot of it has to do with the medication I'm taking for my illness. That's a little catty of you to mention something like that with out knowning all the facts.

And regardless of what you think different things work for different people...what your doing may work for you but not for others...there are slow losers out there and there are people who have other problems that keep them from losing as fast as some one like you.

Now Shell...I hope your feeling better...let us know what your doctors says.

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Heather, it's not meant to be "catty." Someone who is MUCH more experienced with banding once said "Find someone else who is successful with the band and do what they do. Then, you'll be successful, too." There are a LOT of people way more successful with the band than I've been and what I hear, most often, is that they've not only changed the way they eat, but HOW they think about food and eating.

And honestly, you don't know any more about my journey than I know about yours. I could have had port revisions, be on medication, etc...that's all beside the point. Yes, medications can make it harder to lose the weight, yes, being ill can make it more difficult. But, MOST OF THE TIME, bandsters lose 50-100 lbs in the first year by following bandster guidelines. NOT losing with the band is directly related to eating too much and not exercising enough.

It really is simple. To lose the weight, eat less and exercise more. It DOES work.

At this point, I'm going to quit debating this. It just gets kind of frustrating when I KNOW people want to lose the weight and yet there are so many excuses on this board. Things like "But my doctor put mashed potatoes on my list of mushies!" Sure, that means you *can* eat them, but if you're really wanting to lose weight, are they the best choice?! Hell, during the liquid phase, you can drink milk shakes and still be within the "liquids only" guidelines. But why would you?! People spend so much time and energy looking for the "trick" to losing the weight because they don't want to accept that, despite what we "should" be able to eat, you might really have to eat a whole lot less to lose the weight. If you're on medication or have some other health issues, you might have to eat even LESS, but it still works.

If you're not losing, eat less and exercise more. Stick with THAT and the weight comes off. Of course, you can always continue to eat more and then just complain that you're a slow loser or that it works differently for you. :

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