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Tending to children post-op



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I'm entering my third month of a 4-month process to be approved for gastric sleeve surgery. If all goes as planned (fingers crossed), I'll have surgery in early September. At that time, I will have a daughter who's almost three and a son who's six months old. Right now, my daughter weighs 32 pounds and my son weighs 18 pounds. (Yes, he's a BIG one!) To those of you who've been through this with small children, how HARD is it? I know that I won't be able to lift up on anything over 20 pounds or so for the first month, and I keep telling myself that it's ONLY A MONTH, but that seems like a long time to not be able to pick up my babies. On the other hand, I am so ready to do this, and if I don't have surgery before my baby starts walking, I won't be able to do it until he's at least 3. But I'd like to hear from those of you who have done it. FYI, my mom has agreed to help out during the week, and my mother-in-law will help us on the weekends. My husband is also very supportive of this surgery.

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You have a really great support system.......The month will pass by really fast and the kids can sit on your lap and still be with you....You can do this! :P

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With help you should be fine. Just remember to be careful getting your kids in and out of the car seats, it's such a habit that you may forget.

Good Luck!

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Hi, I'm two weeks post op and have a 3 year old. Like you, I have a huge support system and it really hasn't been that big of a deal for me. She crawls in my lap...I just can't pick her up. I was told to not lift anything over 10 lbs., but if your doctor gave you the o.k. for 20 then you shouldn't have a problem with your 6 month old. Like the other post mentioned, be mindful because I started feeling normal around 4 or 5 days out and I would tend to forget. Good luck!

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I'll be a week out tomorrow. I have three kids, 9, 7 and 3. I've been alone with them since Monday from 6am-6pm daily. And I've made out fine surprisingly because I really stressed about this. I don't have anyone to help me though. Today is the best I've felt since surgery. I do not feel like I've had surgery at all. Good luck to you!

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I have a three-year old who thinks I am her personal jungle gym. My husband and I really worked with her before I went for surgery to explain how things would be changing when I got home from the hospital (no more jungle gym, mommy can't pick her up, etc.) and that she would need to be very careful with Mommy's tummy. She has been really great for the most part. We still enjoy our snuggle time, but instead of sitting on my lap, she sits next to me. I'd love to hold her on my lap, but she is too active, and I am not yet healed enough for that. I tried it a few days ago and got a strong elbow poke in one of my incisions. NOT FUN!

Anyway, I would recommend that you prepare your daughter (as much as you feel comfortable sharing with her) and start changing her expectations soon. She is old enough to understand that Mommy has some "boo-boos" and can't pick her up for a while. Your son will not understand, and that will definitely be hard. You will need to brace yourself for feeling like a bad Mommy if you can't pick him up, and you'll have to forgive yourself for it. The most important thing after surgery is that you allow yourself the necessary time to heal! Lean on your support people, and lean on us here at VST if you need us. Know that you're not alone!

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I just love this forum and all of you! Thanks so much!

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I have 3- 3, 6 and 9. The 3 year old wasn't potty trained yet when I had my surgery and he is not an easy pull up change. 4 days after surgery in the 10 minutes people were gone he decides to have a massive blow out. Changing that was NOT fun, but I did it. You should be ok. And I would go easy with the baby for the first week or so, but you should be great

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I have a 2 and 4 year old, My husband was home with me one day before he went back to work. I never had a wt restriction I was told I could lift my kids (they are 30 and 40 pounds) and drive when I could look over my shoulder. I had about 4 days that I was just tired and napped with them. Other than that didn't need pain meds or anything else. Life was back to normal other than I had to keep showing them my bo bo's so that they could kiss them better. I would say you would need help for maybe one week but to not pick them up for a month seems a little overboard. I have been lifting wts and excersicing since 2 weeks post op and picking up kids all along. Good luck

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I have a 2 year old and I am so worried... he loves his Mommy and I love him more... My hubby will be off a week thankfully but a month of not picking him up?!? I'm dreading the thought.

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Fyi for the moms out there, post op was like 1st trimester. It literally reminded me of morning sickness, some nausea, tired and a little dizzy at times. But unlike the 1st trimester it didn't last for 6+ weeks, for me it was 4-5 days. So if you have more than one child you know how hard it is to be pregnant and take care of your kids. Same senario, Hopefully!

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For those of you sleeved with small children: did you have to submit weight history? If so, did you submit pregnancy weight?

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I submitted my 6 week post op from my 3 year old :)

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Wait- post baby check up not post op lol

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I was just sleeved 3 days ago. I'm a stay at home mom of 2 kids (1 and 3.5) and my husband went back to work. I have a 5lb weight lifting restrictions, but realistically, that's just not possible. I've tried avoiding it, or letting the baby crawl onto the couch and on my lap, but for naps I have to pick him in and out of his crib. I try to lift with my knees. I know I'm not supposed to, but I really have no other choice. I have no help. But once my husband gets home from work, he's an amazing help!

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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