I lost 30lbs my first three weeks and now have stalled completely. Everyone who says they have stalled says they lose inches during their stall and I'm not. I have been going to the gym since one week out and hate every minute of it (note:I used to love to exercise). Nothing is fitting me right any more and I look like I don't take care of myself. Any suggestions? I dont have money to buy new clothes every month. I am also losing any confidence I might have because I am starting to look funny. I know I know health is the most important thing but so is mental health. I look like a fat pre pubescent boy. I mustve had 30lbs of curves because they are gone but the rest of my fat is there. And I had a thread similar to this but I mustve accidently unsubscribed and I cant find it. I know everyone says patience but I swear if when this is all through if I look like a man I wont be able to live...oh boy and I can't wait for my hair to start falling out. Upset. Sorry for the rant.

'Nuff said.

I love that Amanda

On the subject of baggy clothes. I feel much better when I wear fitted clothes. I was loosing inches not pounds noticeably to others. I bought a size 14 pants. Wow it fit! Yay

I started at a 22/24. So needless to say. I felt way better about my self in fitted clothes. My self esteem just shot up too. When the scale stalls your sleeve is still working if you work it.

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I think I just fell in love with you! :wub:

Why? Im just speaking the truth...lol

Why? Im just speaking the truth...lol

Yup! You sure are.

Fitted clothes makes a HUGE difference! No way in hell will I wear saggy jeans. As soon as I start feeling frumpy' date=' I go get a new pair! I'm wearing my size 14s I just bought at Walmart for 13 right now and feeling great! I don't even want to take them off ( I've been a size 20+ since I can remember!) Haha![/quote']

Oh wow that is cheap...usually I buy jeans for like $60-100 so 13 is good. I didn't mean to sound cheap but I didn't wanna buy new expensive clothes for every size. I will hit up thrift stores eventually but there are none around here. I get my hair and nails done and do my make up every day but it was really the frumpy clothes that was getting to me so u get it

Why? Im just speaking the truth...lol

Exactly!

I love thrift shopping, you will love it and very economical!!!!

Wow what a group of wonderful words of encouragement!! Thank you everyone!!!! I didn't even ask and I was blessed and encouraged just by reading all the posts! You all are just wonderful!

Oh Janice5/32, did you start gaining weight in the first place and become overweight because you were feeling insecure about what you felt was a boylike figure? Maybe just subconsciously? If so, that might explain your intense discontent. You think you are heading to your worst fear, one that you had already "fixed" by the weight gain. (Our brains don't "fix" things very well, do they?!) That must be tough, knowing you did the right thing for health but still feeling it was so wrong. It's a definite disconnect, for sure, but I think you just weren't prepared to deal with that part. Especially at 23! It's a tough age of self discovery. And I think I understand, as at one of my more successful weight loss program schemes (I've tried them all!), I did a hypnosis course/support group thing. It was rather enlightening to learn that some of us gain some of this weight without realizing it as a form of protection. I myself have always had difficulty dealing the right way with attention from men, so after a failed engagement (wherein my fiance jerkface slept with his coworker's super skinny girlfriend, how cliche!), I ballooned well past my usual safety plumpness as I NEVER wanted to feel that betrayal pain again...so I was "protecting myself" by ensuring that I was the one ignored at the bar with my thinner friends, and feeling like I was in control by having taken myself out of the game completely. Which lead to never leaving my house, which lead to more weight gain, rinse, repeat.

Of course, there are many reasons I'm overweight (all of which I take responsibility for), but that was an aspect of it that has been "working" for me. But now five years of this with a brand new high blood pressure diagnosis and and some intense latent loneliness later, I believe I'm ready to change all that and not be afraid of what happens if I'm not invisible anymore, or to not have the overweight thing be something I can point to as THE REASON WHY NOTHING WORKS IN MY LIFE. Yes, it's a scapegoat, and I'm ready to see what it's like without it. It will be tough, I know, without my tubby suit of armor. I'll probably be all "THE REASON NOTHING WORKS IN MY LIFE NOW ARE THESE FLAPPY BAT WING ARMS AND THIS SAGGY PANNIS I HAVE TO TUCK INTO MY PANTS", hehe. But you only live once, and I'm ready to hurtle into that unknown, as the other rare times I've taken a chance in my life usually turn out pretty good. Although I think that my view may be opposite of the way you are seeing; as maybe you are afraid of becoming more invisible in a way you intensely fear or somesuch, but it's a similar thought process, no? A twisted protection or fear of the unknown and the change. Anyhow, wow, did I just make this all about me? Yes, yes I did. Sorry. I hope you can make a breakthrough in the mental side soon and enjoy your rockin' new bod! We are all pulling for you and hope to see a glorious celebratory post in the future. If not, you can gain it all back by eating little bad things all day long, right?

Oh Janice5/32' date=' did you start gaining weight in the first place and become overweight because you were feeling insecure about what you felt was a boylike figure? Maybe just subconsciously? If so, that might explain your intense discontent. You think you are heading to your worst fear, one that you had already "fixed" by the weight gain. (Our brains don't "fix" things very well, do they?!) That must be tough, knowing you did the right thing for health but still feeling it was so wrong. It's a definite disconnect, for sure, but I think you just weren't prepared to deal with that part. Especially at 23! It's a tough age of self discovery. And I think I understand, as at one of my more successful weight loss program schemes (I've tried them all!), I did a hypnosis course/support group thing. It was rather enlightening to learn that some of us gain some of this weight without realizing it as a form of protection. I myself have always had difficulty dealing the right way with attention from men, so after a failed engagement (wherein my fiance jerkface slept with his coworker's super skinny girlfriend, how cliche!), I ballooned well past my usual safety plumpness as I NEVER wanted to feel that betrayal pain again...so I was "protecting myself" by ensuring that I was the one ignored at the bar with my thinner friends, and feeling like I was in control by having taken myself out of the game completely. Which lead to never leaving my house, which lead to more weight gain, rinse, repeat.

Of course, there are many reasons I'm overweight (all of which I take responsibility for), but that was an aspect of it that has been "working" for me. But now five years of this with a brand new high blood pressure diagnosis and and some intense latent loneliness later, I believe I'm ready to change all that and not be afraid of what happens if I'm not invisible anymore, or to not have the overweight thing be something I can point to as THE REASON WHY NOTHING WORKS IN MY LIFE. Yes, it's a scapegoat, and I'm ready to see what it's like without it. It will be tough, I know, without my tubby suit of armor. I'll probably be all "THE REASON NOTHING WORKS IN MY LIFE NOW ARE THESE FLAPPY BAT WING ARMS AND THIS SAGGY PANNIS I HAVE TO TUCK INTO MY PANTS", hehe. But you only live once, and I'm ready to hurtle into that unknown, as the other rare times I've taken a chance in my life usually turn out pretty good. Although I think that my view may be opposite of the way you are seeing; as maybe you are afraid of becoming more invisible in a way you intensely fear or somesuch, but it's a similar thought process, no? A twisted protection or fear of the unknown and the change. Anyhow, wow, did I just make this all about me? Yes, yes I did. Sorry. I hope you can make a breakthrough in the mental side soon and enjoy your rockin' new bod! We are all pulling for you and hope to see a glorious celebratory post in the future. If not, you can gain it all back by eating little bad things all day long, right? [/quote']

Awesome post! Could be because I see myself in a lot of what you said about how fat was "working" for me, and for many of the same reasons with the same "rinse, repeat" outcome. I, too, have experienced a lot of self-discovery through work with my therapist...still more to come...not always comfortable, but so incredibly beneficial. :-)

I'm going to throw out something of a tangent to this thread and address a small piece of what I noticed you posted. I believe in your OP, you stated that you were stalled, but weren't losing inches as most others experiencing stalls begin to realize. In a later response, you stated that you were afraid to measure yourself for fear of what the numbers might be. Are you so sure that nothing is changing? From my years of experience (like that's a rare bank of experience around here!) in trying to lose weight, I can tell you our brains lie to us. They tell us that we see one thing in the mirror, but the reality is completely different. So, I would suggest that you suck it up and take the measurements and find out for real what changes your body is making. I would further suggest that you do it once a week for the next 6 weeks. Also, have a friend take a photo of you once a week, on the same day, in the same clothes for the next 6 weeks. You don't have to look at the photos right away. Each week won't show you a dramatic change anyway, but over the 6 weeks, you'll really see the difference. Promise yourself for the next 6 weeks while you are testing this, that you will keep an open mind and a positive attitude about what your end result might be. Also promise yourself that you will follow your diet instructions faithfully, if only just to see what happens. At the end of the 6 weeks, go back and review the measurements, photos, and maybe throw in a journal entry each day about how you are feeling and what happened that day as you go along. I think that you will be pleasantly surprised. It will give you something to focus on for the next several weeks instead of allowing yourself to get mired in whatever fears and negative feelings you are having right now.

Give it a shot and let us know how it goes. I'm sure we would all be interested to hear the outcome.

Best of luck. I think the biggest weapon in all of our arsenals as we go through this journey is an open mind and a positive attitude.

You gotta calm down. I stalled for nearly an entire month post surgery and NO I WAS NOT LOSING INCHES. I didn't even START to loose weight until month two and even then it was only 2 pounds a week. You have to ask yourself what your expectations are. Did someone lie to you and tell you that you would be losing 60 pounds a month and be having noticeable differences in appearance every single week? I sincerely hope not, because you appear to be mislead on how this works, fundamentally.