I was discussing my "crazy idea" to have sleeve surgery with someone. (It will be in Mexico.) This person has never been overweight and has admitted to not understanding addictions or why people are obese.

According to them......

I really need to think about why I want to do this.

"You want to lose weight, why don't you just do this pre-op and post-op diet on your own? I mean, you are gonna have to do it with the surgery, just do it without the surgery."

Ummmm....okay. That sounds easy! (sarcastically)

I really need to think about what it is that is making me eat.

"Why do you use food for a coping mechanism? I mean, you quit drinking right? Just use that same will power to quit eating so much."

Oh yeah! Will power.....duh!!!

I really need to do this right and make serious changes.

"You need to make sure you exercise like you are supposed to. Even without exercise, I don't see how this will give you more energy or make you feel better."

Hmmmm. I guess I have a lot of thinking to do.

You need to decide if you want to go thru with this and why. Then you need to find you some SUPPORT persons to surround yourself with. I had a person or two at work that just question me but don't support me. Now I try to avoid the subject with them. I am eleven days post op and happy I went thru it. Good luck

But you said it yourself, that person has never been overweight and doesn't understand why people are obese. I myself never had a weight problem until my adult years, after a car accident took me from being extremely active to non-active for 2 years and the weight slowly kept piling on. It's not like anyone wants to be obese, or chooses this life, but things happen. I have done the high protein, low carb (same as post-op diet) in the past, along with many other things like WW and exercise..., and guess what...they didn't work. I had been at the same weight +/- 5 lbs. for 12 years prior to my sleeve. The reason I ended up having WLS is because I was told last year i was diabetic and was put on metformin. I didn't want to live with diabetes, and figured the risk of the surgery was way less than that of the diabetes. I went into the hospital a diabetic and left the hospital the next day not one. I am now one month out and down 21 lbs. last time i checked and food no longer controls me. I'm never hungry and now eat to survive, not because it tastes good or I have to clear my plate like I was told to when I was younger. Now I can have a bite or 2 of foods I like and am satisfied, but the great thing is, is I no longer crave carbs...at all. I don't want the ice cream, pizza, bread, cookies, etc. that I used to love. I just have no interest in them anymore. Anyway, everyone has their own reasons for having WLS, and as long as you are absolutely sure it is the best thing for you then you need to do it. This is YOUR life and you must live it for you first. Best of luck to you, and whatever you chose I hope it's the best choice for you.

There are always people that are going to be antagonistic. You have to listen to your self. I have friends that were unsupportive and it hurts. I had people tell me to just walk a few times a week. Like it's that easy. I didn't want to want to eat anymore. So, I'm 2 weeks out and feel great. Do your research and decide what's best for you.

I am the flip side of Traci. I was a skinny person until after my mid 20's. Drastic life changes caused me to pack on the pounds along with metabolic changes and a dramatic slow down in my physical activity. Could win a frequent flier award at almost every weight loss clinic/club around. Let me confess that I am a volume eater. That voice of "feed me" never shut up....NEVER. Now, the sleeve cured that for a while (not everyone loses to hunger urge with sleeve) but came back. What I am in the process of is learning the difference between head hunger and physical hunger. Back to you...sorry sidetracked.

If you can do this on your own, please do. But for me, I was tired of being a failure repeatedly for years and over a decade. Simply could not do this on my own. Could lose weight for a period, sometimes up to a year but it always came back and with more. The disappointment in me was crushing. Ongoing hate cycle was killing me more than the weight I had on this one body of mine.

So, look inside yourself and take a good hard look. Can you do this solo? Don't let anyone push you into a quick response. Really consider any other option. My answer was no. Remember, VSG is not reversible so your decision if yes if permanent. I am permanently altered where I can no longer gorge.

I love my sleeve and have no regrets. Best wishes.

This could be a conversation between my husband and myself. He thinks I should just eat like I've had surgery already, and skip the surgery. Money saved in his opinion! We banter about my upcoming surgery almost daily now that it's coming up in less than a month...I've decided to just not talk about it anymore with him, or around him..I'm headed to Mexico and my daughter has chosen to accompany me because he refuses too. I even contemplated going alone for a while. Take some time and research and learn as much as you can...it will help solidify your resolution, if this is truly what you desire. For myself, I'm tired of going on a diet, losing weight, then in few short months gaining it all back. I need something new, something I haven't tried before, something that will support me in my healthy efforts and hopefully be the answer to a better me. This is a last ditch effort for me...I'm gearing up for my last good fight to finally be the person I know I can be. If you decide you want this...no one and no thing will stand in your way. Good luck!!

I'm having the same issue, tonight I was asked,'what is the surgery going to do that a diet won't?' You'd think I'd have a better answer by now, but I mumbled something about how I just did. An hour later, I'm arguing to my computer monitor that the removal of the grehlin helps significantly as well as the inability to inhale huge portions. She says I'll never be able to have cake again....ok...and? It's a tasty thing but I'm rather tired of being addicted to the sweets and getting myself caught up in chasing the next sugar high (more like a sugar hill). It's so frustrating. I'm under a lot of stress over this as my surgery is on the 5th and this does not help.

Thank you so much everyone! I really love to hear your personal stories and advice. I always come back to....Yes, I'm going to do this.

Juny, when my doc & I were talking and I was leaning towards "go home and try again for another year to lose 100+ pounds, he said to me " the reason that won't work is because diets are so restrictive, we become too hungry and we give up". Yep, that is true. I was so frustrated that since after the surgery I was going to have to eat small amounts and excersise, why can't I do that without surgery. Well almost 6 months postop, down 75 lbs I understand why. I was always hungry hungry hungry. Now I am satisfied with small amounts, after dropping 30 lb.'s it was easier to move. I have not been this small for 23 years. I was scared and vacillating pre surg., people tell me they are so proud of me that I had the courage to do this. I am becoming prouder of me too.

I told my whole immediate family, including my dad's wife. Now, after reading the boards so much I know why people suggest not telling very many people. Everyone has an opinion. Thankfully, I am strong enough in my convictions that I won't be talked out of anything. If people can't support me, I don't need them around. They say funerals and weddings bring out the best and worst in people. I think you can add WLS/VSG to that group as well.

That would have been my opportunity to educate this person, tell them that haven't experienced it and they most likely will never understand unless they go through it. Take them to a seminar and let them see what we go through. I don't tolerate negativity and thankfully I haven't experienced it, I have had nothing but support. Sometimes we have to gather up that courage defend our decisions and stand proud for making those decisions. If anyone were to try to dissuade prior to the surgery I would tell them have you seen what obesity does to people.......it kills you. Obese people have an increased risk of heart disease, diabetes and cancer. Educate them!

I was the person telling others that WLS was a permanent solution to a temporary problem - all it takes is sticking to it - move more, eat less - yadda yadda yadda. I dieted myself to the point of not being able to lose any weight at all. I am soooooooo (did I say soooooooo?) happy that a) the VSG was available and I had it done. You will be too.

I had a friend who didn't want me to have the surgery. She told me she had a "vision" that I would die from surgery. She is no longer my friend. I don't need to be terrorized by a friend. She can now view my progress when I run into her.

Oh my gosh! I used to have a friend that would do that to me. One of the last things she said is....Is your Mom okay? I have a weird feeling something is going to happen. (she doesn't get along with her mom and me and my mom have the best relationship with tons of love) So, EW! to my so called friend, she is no longer in my life.

The "Hmmmm. I guess I have a lot of thinking to do." was meant to be sarcastic but it didn't read that way and in no way did I imply it. lol. I just felt like ranting about not getting support. I have since told my mom and she is scared but she will support my decision.

No one is changing my mind. I keep changing my mind regarding the dates because of the financial part but I have tentatively decided on the middle-end of May.

Hey 2013isit! I'll be back in SD for Thanksgiving/My birthday. We should meet up!

Oh boy, who doesn't completely understand you on this one. My surgery is 2/12. I am very protective of myself emotionally so I really hid it from everyone until I had my surgery date. I only told my partner and my mom early on because... well, it's my partner and my mom! Anyhoo... they are scared and in being scared for my well being... they come across as being not very supportive. I get it. So I haven't really had anyone to REALLY talk to about it. Until one of my co-workers was very interested and expressed to me how hard she knows it must be and wanted to know everything. It was the most I've spoken out loud about this surgery and.... It felt so good! And now... I'm going to go write her a thank you card to tell her how much that meant to me. Changing39.. I hope you can find someone like this!

Until one of my co-workers was very interested and expressed to me how hard she knows it must be and wanted to know everything. It was the most I've spoken out loud about this surgery and.... It felt so good! And now... I'm going to go write her a thank you card to tell her how much that meant to me. Changing39.. I hope you can find someone like this!

Good for you......sometimes you will be surprised.