Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Recommended Posts

I guess this is more of a vent or rant or whatever but the closer I get to my actual surgery the more I get the fear of failure. I know of 2 people personally who have been sleeved and are at least 6 months out and one of them actually gained weight and the other 40lbs and then started to gain again. One of these women exercise daily and eats properly yet she is gaining again. I know failure is usually due to wrong diet or not exercising but what if I do all of that and it doesnt work?? I have done my research and know the success rate is very high for sleeve and I try to stay as positive as much as I can but I still get that fear in the back on my head that I will be one of those who fail. I have an amazing husband who is supporting me throughout this whole process but he is the only support I have outside of this site. I have several friends however they have already expressed their opinion about wls on others who have had it and its not good so I have decided its none of their business so I am not telling them. I have another friend who had the full gastric (roux en y) and 1 month out she is eating cheese burgers and fries for lunch so she is not the support that I need thru this because she just ruined the tool that was given to her by the surgeon. I know this is the right thing for me for to do for myself and i plan on going thru with it but just afraid it wont work. I have been overweight my entire life and EVERYTHING that I tried did not work and I know this is true with all of you otherwise you would not have decided on surgery. Sorry again just a nagging thought in my head I had to get out.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I feel the exact same way. My surgery is on Sept 21. I can't even do the liquid diet right now.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

FINALLY!!!!!!! someone with the same surgery date as me! :) I am glad im not the only one who feels that way.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

COOL!! I'm going to Mexico for my surgery. I have been doing videos on Youtube, I'm VSGJean. I love watching other peoples videos, it truly helps knowing that you aren't the only one.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Fear of failure is normal. Remember before you go in that this is not magic. You still have to work at it but that doesn't mean you will fail. When I heard this before my surgery (That I would have to do some work too) I thought ...forget it then! I am weak and if I had any smidgeon of ability to control my food intake then I wouldn't need surgery! But here is the difference. You already DO have willpower and ability whether you know it or not. The fact that you are still alive and still reaching out for help proves it. Imagine if you tried to shovel your snowy driveway with a teaspoon. You would get frustrated and give up. But if someone suddenly gave you a snowblower you'd say "Ok! Now I'm in business!" You would still have to do some of the work BUT now you have the tool to help you. Suddenly your confidence will grow and you will find you had strength in there you didn't even know b/c too many years of failure had weighed you down and frustrated you. You can do it! If I can...anyone can. But know this--you will have to exercise. You will have to work at it mentally. You will have to forgive yourself for mistakes. But you can do it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Holly, you are a true inspiration!! Thank you for your comment. I feel a bit better, I know I will great after my surgery. I love to exercise, I did it for 9 months and only lost 12 pounds. I was very discourage. I know with this new tool I am giving to myself is going to be life changing.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I feel the same way as you ladies! Thank you Holly, you are an inspiration. My surgery is this Friday I was supposed to start my liquid diet last Friday and couldn't do it. I'm trying to start today. Drinking my first Protein Shake now. I hope and pray everyday that I will succeed. I will pray for you ladies as well.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Holly I love the snowblower analogy. I know it's going to be tough but to read what you posted is motivating.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was sleeved 9/6, two nights in the hospital and now home. The hardest thing was the post op 10 day liquid diet. The first few days with almost no carbs made me a little crazy and then by day 10 I was worn out (staying at the hospital with my 92 yo dad overnight, did not help). I think the tiredness was mostly emotional. Good news? I lost 20 lbs. on post op!

I am feeling ok. Slept in my bed, no meds except tylenol since I left hospital. Drinking EAS shakes. Little bit at a time. Bedroom upstairs, no problem. I think the meds were holding me down.

. I gained some weight in the hospital, was puffed up by the fluids, not worried. It will go on its own. Some pain between the ribs and under the shoulders but walking on the treadmill for short time often. Trying to move around a bit. I have a very high pain tolerance so that helps alot.

I wish you all the best!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Libby I hate the idea of pain. I have a high pain tolerance but when I do feel it I turn into a big baby! Also according to my NUT she said I will be on puréed foods once I leave the hospital so not just a liquid diet which I think wil help me some.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I feel the same way as you ladies! Thank you Holly, you are an inspiration. My surgery is this Friday I was supposed to start my liquid diet last Friday and couldn't do it. I'm trying to start today. Drinking my first Protein Shake now. I hope and pray everyday that I will succeed. I will pray for you ladies as well.

I'm starting to think that they say 2 weeks, because they know it will take a week to get adjusted to it!! It's like when you have a friend that is always 30 minutes late to everything, you start telling her that everything is 30 minutes earlier so she will be there on time.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I never considered failure. I thought if you just followed the NUT n4 and exercised you would see the results....hmmm Im going to have to google this. Im surprised to here your friend did eat right and exercised and gained.....hmmmmm

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was too. I actually wondered if she is not doing everything the right way when she is not around us.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I too am getting sleeved the 21st! I have the same fears, I have a friend who got the realize band in January and has gained weight. However, I agree that it's not magic and I will have to work (and I will fail sometimes) but in the end I will succede because I am trying. And you will too! (succede)!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • vsg.with.sharon

      Hey everyone!
      I’m new here! Looking for some friends! 🥰
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×