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The Fine Line Between Acceptance And Making Excuses



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Thank you Sweetums, you are correct, I was not asking to be judged, peremptory judgement is what got a lot of us here in the first place, I am looking for discussion, the sort of talk-therapy thing VST is good for. :) Thanks to everyone for their comments, they are helping me formulate an understanding.

Yesterday I ate ... some chinese broth with pork chunks and vegetables, a sandwich with pork chunks, cheddar cheese, and pickles, a few red grapes, a Swedish crepe with some mascerated raspberries, and some tea with milk. I should not have had the crepe or the bread on the sandwich but otherwise, did okay? Also a yoga and a pilates class.

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" I should not have had the crepe or the bread on the sandwich." You answered your own question.

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Yes, thank you notime, I'm aware. Be very careful of how judgemental you are of others, it will come back to bite you in the a$$.

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Don't ask for a judgement if you don't want one.

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@Globetrotter-

from one bay area girl to another.....you look fantastic!

I doubt any of us have had perfect adherance to our perscribed post-op diets- all we can do is take it day-by-day and do the best we can.

I think its awesome that you can be honest with yourself and this community about your experiences and hope that some of the comments give you the insight/motivation/laughs to keep moving forward. This is a lifelong commitment and I cant imagine living in a world w/o a scoop of Ben & Jerrys once in a while!!

So have your sugar, carbs and cocktails (in moderation) and with a side of yoga or cardioblast and live the best damn life you can imagine! :)

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You are too funny...I love the little tiny font! The problem, like you have said, is to overcome the mental game of it. Why should we apologize for eating a donut every once in a while. I do it! We have Tim Horton's here in Canada and they have Timbits (donut holes). The once every 3 weeks to month that we have them, I usually have 4-6...you heard right, 4-6! I am full afterward, but I enjoyed them. Whether or not you feel like it is becoming a problem is really up to you, and not for any of us to judge.

They have Tim Hortons in Ohio, can I just tell you those are the best dang on mini donuts I have ever eaten! I will not tell you how many we ate driving from Ohio to VA....

Sorry off topic but I just had to chime in on the T.H!

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Haha, thank YOU CaliKat, you are awesome! I definitely need that kind of power talk right now :) Went for a hike last night, several miles of rugged terrain, and today have eaten a piece of sausage, half a small biscuit, and drank an iced chai, no sugar. lunch will be some curried beef, no rice, and dinner will be some elk - a very lean protein- in a salad.< /p>

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@Globetrotter-

from one bay area girl to another.....you look fantastic!

I doubt any of us have had perfect adherance to our perscribed post-op diets- all we can do is take it day-by-day and do the best we can.

I think its awesome that you can be honest with yourself and this community about your experiences and hope that some of the comments give you the insight/motivation/laughs to keep moving forward. This is a lifelong commitment and I cant imagine living in a world w/o a scoop of Ben & Jerrys once in a while!!

So have your sugar, carbs and cocktails (in moderation) and with a side of yoga or cardioblast and live the best damn life you can imagine! :)

ALLELUIA!! This is what I have done and try to get across the point to others! I am not saying go back to your old eating habits, you will never succeed if you don't change what you eat. But you have to be realistic. I know that I can not go the rest of my life without ever eating a little bit of ice cream or some chocolate. The key, like you said, is moderation and a healthy lifestyle. Something you can live with for the rest of your life. And to get away from the guilt and shame that we put ourselves through. I have found, with the sleeve, tomorrow really is a new day!

Oh, and Globetrotter, I think you are gorgeous! You have done amazing and look great!

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So I have struggled with a plateau for about 4-5 months now and I know that it is (mostly) my own dang fault; I've always been an excruciatingly slow loser but in the last 6 months I have stopped being true to my super-low carb/high protein/low cal diet. On the one hand, I justify it because I am committed to eating healthfully and reasonably and that means not living the rest of my life on a diet. Sounds good right? But, I think I'm toeing the line of making excuses, I let myself eat M&M's, bread, soda!! Grrrrr.

Today I am having a Protein shake, 2 eggs, greek yogurt with a spoonful of jam, lots of hot tea sweetened with stevia, and probably a caesar salad w chicken for dinner and maybe some hot quinoa and a tiny piece of chocolate. That sounds ,,, bad? good? cheating?

Does anyone else struggle with the psychology of this?

You sound exactly like me. I keep thinking shouldn't it be habitual and a no brainer to eat healthy. But no, I let some old habits creep back in and I paid less and less attention to everything. I think it all started when I quit writing down everything I am eating. Like you I am getting back on track and feeling good again. I'm just happy I only had a stall and didn't gain anything back. I know friends that hit this long stall and started gaining back because they gave up.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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