The "DeLarla's Back" Fun Thread

[Lisa Bones 0]

Please post your resume here (and don't bore me to tears with what you do for a living.) Don't go back more than a few years, and only list the good stuff because this is a happy thread, damn it.

DeLarla

Got 2 women pregnant (showed them new positions that worked)

Sold Remote Control Panties out of my truck

I can play a straw

Wore a showgirl costume

Talked on my cell phone to the North Pole to a famous hockey pro

Can tie a cherry stem with my tongue faster than anyone I've ever met

I held a monkey, and he sat on my head

Kissed a cowboy (just a friendly kiss, but still a cowboy)

Tap danced in the men's room

Rode a quad topless in Mexico

Partied on Bourbon St.

Rekindled my marriage

Got a speeding ticket in San Antonio

Accidentally bought $600.00 in Harley shirts in Dallas

Reunited with my boyfriend from 20 years ago - now just amazing friends

My old roomate found me - planning big September reunion

Got a call from Switzerland from another hockey player

Got a new Shaman

Found my g-spot (again, haha)

Got a new Harley

I can twirl a baton

You puedo hablar Espanol

I can say, "Maria bought a blouse at the store" in 4 languages

Won $3,500

Pole Danced at a strip club on the Vegas Strip - the Palomino!

Rode the bull at Gilley's

[3loves 0]

How can I touch that? My brain is shutting down & I'm going to have to get back to you on this fun thread tomorrow. I'm getting my first fill and driving 3 hrs with a fuzzy headed little boy in the back to keep me company. It should be a fun trip. Maybe I'll have something sexy to report after my fills. Sure would like a pair of those remote control panties. Could you just see that going on during a fill? Someone should get that on video.

[Lisa Bones 0]

If you grab the nurses booby, you'll have something for your resume.

[503-250 1]

Have seen 49 of the 50 states (Alaska I see you hiding up there)

Have meet every president who was in office while I was alive.

Got a speeding ticket in most of the states of the union, paid more then a few of them in cash on the side of the road.

Talked my way out of a 110 in a 55 in Minnesota.

I can say I have a pencil, I have a large pencil and my large pencil is yellow in three languages (hell English is the easiest one).

I asked out Marissa Tomei...and she didn't say no...she said she had to leave for LA that night...her loss.

I've been to Graceland

I convinced a wonderful beautiful smart girl to marry me...despite that ME part of that sentence.

In a drunken stupor I walked outside in the snow, urinated in front of a large bay window filled with laughing college girls who took many polaroids and then walked half way back and decided to sleep in the snow.

I've drank enough Jack Daniels to get most of this forum blackout drunk.

I lived on a bus with a bunch of long haired freaks.

Drove from NY to Orlando in 19 hrs.

Drove from NY to Decatur in 26...then six days later made it back in 28.

Shook hands with John Lee Hooker, Jimmy Page, Robert Plant, Pete Townshend, Jeff Beck, Neil Young, Chuck berry, Ray Charles, Frank Sinatra, Tony Bennet, Paul Anka and on and on....

Worked 6 of the Rock and Roll hall of fame induction ceremonies

Was at the Rock and Roll hall of fame opening...and the concert the night before.

Barrel rolled a mustang fastback and climbed out without a scratch.

Gonna lose 150 lbs and buy my first Harley to help me lose a hundred more.

[Dody 0]

1. I married a real cowboy....bull rider and all. (we both were a little nuts).

2. I delivered 5 girls and have my own basketball team. That's a tough one to do.

3. I speak 3 languages somewhat fluently...whoopee. Who really cares unless I fly to Spain or Italy.

4. I own a stable of racehorses some very nice ones, and one two-year-old may be derby bound. That's a big one for me. My horses run at DelMar right now and they are doing great under the watchful eye of their trainer Jeff Mullins (an authentic Idaho homegrown guy)

5. I'm good friends with Gary Stevens and his folks (ah he would be a retired Hall of Fame Jockey that won several Kentucky Derby's.)

6. I just realized if I'm not talking about my kids, horses, or dogs I really have nothing to talk about.

7. I love my band and named it "Faith"..hope that works.

8. I once rode a mechanical bull for 8 seconds...LOL, then I bit the floor.

9. I have 8 great grandkids.

10. I still go to my friend's Fantasy Night at her house when all the sexy lingerie comes out and the toys.

11. Most of all I've met a wonderful man here which was completely unexpected and set up by my kids of all things...nothing like fixing mom up. I think they would love for me to stay in Tennessee and that I might do There are gardeners to take care of the lawn and a housekeeper that comes in once a mo. to dust and keep things nice even though no one is living here. What more could I want?

12. I'm also a professional handicapper of horses and have been for 20 years. I make a darned good living at it too. Don't gamble a lot, but sell loads of tip sheets to tracks.

13. Who would think a 64-year-old would be handicapping horses? Beats me? Lots people don't know....

I guess that's it. Can't keep up with you DeCarla.

[Guest myband]

Bored already!!!

[Morsaille 4]

Lets see...

I kissed Darius Rucker aka "Hootie"

I have been in all but three states

I was once in four states at the same time

I've watched the heat lightning at 2 am on the plains

I've been swimming in both the Atlantic and Pacific oceans

I had a lot of fun on a Florida freeway during one of those "monsoon" type rainstorms

Danced with a cowboy while he sang "Amarillo by Morning" in my ear

Danced naked in the snow at 14,000 feet and have pics to prove it

Seen lightning with no thunder and heard thunder with no lightning

I once peeled and ate an agave cactus while living in the desert

I ruined my favorite calf-skin gloves peeling an agave cactus

I speak enough French and Spanish to really get into trouble

I can give myself a full bath with one canteen of Water

I really got into trouble speaking French on a train

I sang New York, New York in a Seattle dive.

I touched a whale accidentally at 58 feet

I've made, and slept in, a snow cave

I was kissed by Sir Elton John

Name dropping time...

Jacob Dylan (wallflowers), Stephen Baldwin, Chris Isaak, Bill Clinton, Caroline Kennedy, Arnold Schwarzenegger, our current prez... listed in order of face-time, from "heart to heart" to "hey, great to meet ya, bye"

You all rock, those are some GREAT lists people! Thanks foodstampchamp for the info, my mind went blank at midnight. Maybe I should stop kissing on men whose name I can't remember?

Brenda

[foodstampchamp 3]

Who is Hootie? Darius Rucker?

[503-250 1]

Danced naked in the snow at 14,000 feet and have pics to prove it

Are these pictures posted here?

I can give myself a full bath with one canteen of Water

Will these pictures be with the dancing pictures?

I sang New York, New York in a Seattle dive.

I left one off...I sang New York New York with my wife and Don Ho on our honeymoon...he called us up on stage to sing a traditional Hawaiian song, thank god he meant NY NY...although i'm not sure the audience enjoyed my "singing".

Stephen Baldwin

Some nice boys those Baldwins...Danny and Alec were my babysitters, I went to school with Steven and Billy. Ignore what you read about them in the papers, these are some nice guys who love their family, but most of all love their mom.

Some impresses lists so far.

Dody you are rapidly becoming my hero.

[Lisa Bones 0]

My mouth just dropped open in a severe fit of jealousy. I can barely get past, "been to 49 states" since that's something I've always wanted to do! And you got tickets in all of them, you rotten brat! And I've never danced naked in the snow, or kissed Hootie. And Dody, don't come near me any more because I just can't take the fact that you married a cowboy and have horses. I married a steel cowboy and we have steel horses, but my dream is to live on a ranch (with ranch hands doing all the work, of course.)

Keep the list going, this fascinates me and gives me ideas for my next ventures! If you think of more, put them in the bottom on bold.

[DrewsLou 3]

I played pool with Kiefer Sutherland on my brother's 21st bday.

I see amazing sunrises almost everyday here in CO.

I married my best friend.

I have the world's 2 cutest dogs.

I drove my jeep with the top off, naked, with my best girlfriend after the bar closed one night in the summertime.

I saw a bear in our campsite once.

I got a guitar pick from Mike Ness.

I am AFRAID of horses.

Starbucks is my latest vice.

Today is my first day of not smoking.

I have "forgot the bull and rode the cowboy" more than a few times.

I am becoming a better person everyday.

[Elisabethsew 50]

I'm not as worldly as most of you but this is a fun and interesting thread. Most of my "interesting" experiences resulted from my work in the hospital.

In the hospital I took care of:

1. Whitey Ford (baseball)

2. Raul Julia (actor, played Gomez in the Adams's Family movie... so sad that he died)

3. Mr. Carey (Mariah Carey's Dad and had some very interesting talks with her and her sister)

4. Billy Joel (he sang me a song and has a very nice new wife... the daughter is another story)

5. Mr. Walken (Christopher Walken's dad and he's as weird in real life as he is on the movie screen)

6. Robert Deniro (Said to call him Bobby and was a very nice person)

7. Tony Danza (EXACTLY the same as you see him on TV... a real person)

I had a summer job as an assistent to Robin Gibb of the BeeGees and received a marriage proposal from an Italian man while vacationing in Ireland... go figure.

That's about it for now. Keep on posting.

[MarcyD 0]

I generally lead a boring life. Most of my interesting experiences have also stemmed from work:

1. Took care of Dolly Parton's neice when she developed leukemia. (Dolly and her sister look and sound amazingly alike!)

2. Delivered a baby

3. Sang "Wild Thing" with Faith Hill at the Children's Hospital in Nashville along with my best friend. She said we sounded great.

4. Attended the same church as Amy Grant and Michael W. Smith

5. Fell in love with my adopted daughter in a renovated monastery in Guatemala with volcanos smoking in the background.

[wavydaby 1]

My list is short and relatively unimpressive

1. I met Mother Theresa. (yes, more than 2 years ago)

2. Snuck in to the Supreme Court building to watch the justices do their thing. (again, more than 2 years ago)

3. I married the most wonderful dude ever

4. Had the most beauuutiful baby girl, who is no longer a baby and starts school in a week.

5. Got banded last week

[Dianechef 3]

Well, after reading all these, I have decided that I must have a very boring life. My most exciting announcement is that I lost 65 lbs!! HA!