Please post your resume here (and don't bore me to tears with what you do for a living.) Don't go back more than a few years, and only list the good stuff because this is a happy thread, damn it.

DeLarla

Got 2 women pregnant (showed them new positions that worked)

Sold Remote Control Panties out of my truck

I can play a straw

Wore a showgirl costume

Talked on my cell phone to the North Pole to a famous hockey pro

Can tie a cherry stem with my tongue faster than anyone I've ever met

I held a monkey, and he sat on my head

Kissed a cowboy (just a friendly kiss, but still a cowboy)

Tap danced in the men's room

Rode a quad topless in Mexico

Partied on Bourbon St.

Rekindled my marriage

Got a speeding ticket in San Antonio

Accidentally bought $600.00 in Harley shirts in Dallas

Reunited with my boyfriend from 20 years ago - now just amazing friends

My old roomate found me - planning big September reunion

Got a call from Switzerland from another hockey player

Got a new Shaman

Found my g-spot (again, haha)

Got a new Harley

I can twirl a baton

You puedo hablar Espanol

I can say, "Maria bought a blouse at the store" in 4 languages

Won $3,500

Pole Danced at a strip club on the Vegas Strip - the Palomino!

Rode the bull at Gilley's

I closed down a bar in Austin, Texas listening to some funky jazz band. The lights came up, and down on the floor was Kenny Loggins. I shook his hand and he kissed my right cheek. Or was it the left? (damn beer).

I'll think of some more, but I promise my list isn't very long. Plus, I'm not telling my own Cowboy Secrets. Stuff hubby doesn't even know about. Some things you just need to keep yer mouth shut about, right?

1. flown several times to places in the united states and canada to meet people I met online. (got lucky and none of them were psycho!)

2. Met most of the Detroit Red Wings.

3. Met Bill Clinton twice and shook his hand. No cigars involved!

4. made love to my husband on the beach of Lake Michigan at midnight.

5. Stole my dinner plate from Hockeytown Cafe in Detroit because it had a red wing logo on it. Had to have it and it was the only thing I've ever stolen. I was drunk, sorry! HAHA

6. Never rode a horse.

7. Met Gordie Howe!

8. laughed so hard my contact lense flew out of my right eye and I found it in my hair on the left side of my head. hahaha.

9. realizing my life isn't as exciting as I had hoped. hahaha

6. Robert Deniro (Said to call him Bobby and was a very nice person)

This one wipes out my entire list.

yep- thats all great but have you had the opportunity to shake the hand of Lisa Bones?!!! Then I'll be impressed!!

She is one happen chick!!

You Lisa, are my new example of how to have fun!!

I got a guitar pick from Mike Ness.

*DROOOOOOOOOL*

I love love love Mike Ness and Social D. YUM!

Are these pictures posted here?

Will these pictures be with the dancing pictures?

I could just black myself out and leave my naked buddies to do all the public snow dancing...but where would I post them..? Maybe I should just start up a website of my own. ha

Some nice boys those Baldwins...Danny and Alec were my babysitters, I went to school with Steven and Billy. Ignore what you read about them in the papers, these are some nice guys who love their family, but most of all love their mom. .

They were filming a mini-series that I don't think ever aired; Romeo and Juliet: the murder mysteries or something similar. I ran into the blond Baldwin on a vacated lot. Is it really spelled with a "v"? Now I feel silly

Really incredible lists people!

What a great thread! Everyone has had such exciting and interesting adventures.

I went to high school with Emmanuel Lewis (Webster)

One of the Beastie Boys flirted with me when I was wayyyy to young to know how to flirt back, and before they were famous

I used to hitchhike regularly to the Rockaways

I've met Thomas Pynchon - twice

Caught a Ramones guitar pick, and gave it to a friend thinking I could get one again (what was I thinking???)

1) Lost 75 lbs!!! That's a new one (as of today), and it is the biggest thing in my life right now.

2) Moved to New Orleans. Most fearless thing I've ever done.

3) Lived in NYC for 4 years.

4) Took a second spring break senior year and went to Italy for a week to visit a friend.

5) Had my car, ipod, and sunglasses stolen, then had my computer die two days later. Didn't give up or move home.

hmmm, what does my list look like for the last few years....

• I'm a professional belly dancer, who happens to be fat
  
• I’ve surfed porn professionally (yeah, I know, you said no job stuff, but I decided to include these two…)
  
• I'm teaching myself how to draw and paint (I’ve been commissioned to do a ceramic piece, does this count as a job thing?)
  
• I was awarded a prestigious full-ride scholarship to study information assurance (anti-hacker stuff), left my husband and son to go study with one of the best minds in security
  
• I can tie a cherry stem in a knot using my mouth
  
• I was able to freak out most of my campus at ISU just by walking across the quad dressed like a Goth
  
• Met a woman on the internet and flew to Las Vegas and spent the weekend with her in a hotel. I told my son he couldn’t do the same. Ok, truth be told, I met several women on the internet and flew out to spend the weekend with them… I just won’t be able to make it to the Vegas Bash this year… (Love you Christina! Glad you are feeling better!)
  
• I took “basic horsemanship” for PE at ISU, classes started one week after I was banded. I own a pair of working cowboy boots.

I was going to say that I’ve been knocked flat on my ass by Chuck Norris, but that was more than a couple of years ago, so I won’t mention it.

1. Traveled to Australia, New Zealand, Mainland China (including Tibet and Hong Kong SAR), United Kingdom, Spain, France, Germany, Netherlands, Italy, Greece, Switzerland, Brussels, Romania, and various locales throughout North and Central America (that's straight off my real resume...I couldn't think of anything else interesting to put on it).

2. Baked a five-hour chocolate cake that I saw made on the food network - and it turned out great!

3. Made the Law Review at my law school (a huge deal for law students).

4. Got a fancy new car and then talked shit to anyone who would listen about some random asshole keying it, only to find out that the real culprit was....my garage door.

5. Also according to my real resume, I can speak Romanian and French (please don't call me on it).

Missed you, DeCarla. Glad you're back.

**I’ve surfed porn professionally (yeah, I know, you said no job stuff, but I decided to include these two…)**

This kinda work doesn't count, it's encouraged on this resume. Whoda thunk? The more I read my list, the stupider I look. What the heck is a Palindrome? A Goth?

Leatha, I tried to reply earlier but that picture made me cry so I had to go away for a bit. I had to postpone this year's party - just way too much going on at once, but now I'll have this stuff called, "time." Oh, and they say I'll get this stuff called, "sleep?" Someone actually had the nerve to tell me I'd get used to this thing called, "sleeping in." Whah?

A palindrome is a word that is spelled the same forward and backward. Like Strawarts. Or Hannah. Or "Madam, I'm Adam."

"I was going to say that I’ve been knocked flat on my ass by Chuck Norris, but that was more than a couple of years ago, so I won’t mention it."

I started the thread, I make the rules. If you got knocked on your ass by Chuck Norris or licked Elvis, please go to the head of the class.

Okay, I've been thinkin' about this & my life isn't as boring as I thought.

1) I ran myself over with my own car & lived to tell about it. (Yes, this is true!!)

2) I have the world's craziest Mother-in-law & yet I bite my tongue every time I'm around her & just put up with her crap to keep the peace.

3) Quit my $3,000/month job to do stay home & do a job that pays squat, but has lots of big rewards. (I'm a full-time Mom now!)

4) I went from a frumpy 260 lb. woman to a sexy lady in 1 yr. :biggrin1:

5) I found an old boyfriend on the internet & was so happy I dumped him.

6) I booked my first cruise for October to celerate our 13th Wedding Anniversary. (Supposed to go on our 10th, but hey...)

7) After 3 yrs. of marriage counseling, my husband & I finally get it!!

8) I purchased my prize posession - my grand piano!!

9) Will be fulfilling a life long dream of writing out all my music & hopefully publishing it. (I bought the VERY EXPENSIVE software & electric piano to finally do it!)

I lived in Germany for 5 years and that was awesome. I've traveled to many countries and have wonderful memories.....but can't touch some of the stuff you guys have accomplished.

Lisa, it is so good to have you back.