Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

List of things I am sick of because of my weight.



Recommended Posts

I am 25 years old, 5 feet nine inches tall, and I weigh 330lbs. I am in a size 24 pants. I look at myself all of the time and am just disgusted with the way that I look anymore. It brings me up when people tell me that something I am wearing is cute, but then I think to myself, "It would look even cuter if I didn't have rolls hanging out." I know people say big women (or men) are beautiful, but I beg to differ. Yes there are other beautiful women that are big, and they can look amazing, but I don't feel that I am one of them.

I am sick of going into a bathroom stall and having to practically straddle the toilet to be able to close the door. I am sick of going to amusement parks with my family, and when my nephew asks me to go on certain rides with him, I tell him no, not because I don't want to, but because I am scared of being embarrassed that I won't fit. I am sick of not being comfortable when I sit in certain chairs because the arms of the chair dig into my sides. I am sick of having to pay a lot of money for clothes, when I really don't get a huge selection to choose from. I have a sore knee, and when I went to my doctor, he told me that the pain would go away if I lost weight. I hate going to the doctor to have my blood pressure taken and they have to use the larger cuff around my arm because the smaller one doesn't fit. When I fly on an airplane I don't want to have to make the seatbelt the biggest it will go, and still fear that I may have to ask for an extender. I want to be able to go to a baseball game and sit comfortably next to someone else without having to cross my arms over my chest so that we all have enough arm room.

My doctor told me back in January that I am definitely a candidate for WLS. So he referred me to the surgeon's office. I called the surgeon's office and got the list of seminars in the mail. I attended a seminar, and then I was told that I could make an appointment to go see the surgeon. On May 18th, I saw the surgeon, and he suggested that since I still want to have children in the future that the sleeve is the way to go. Since speaking to the surgeon I was waiting months for a call from them to set up appointments for pre-op testing. No one really told me about going back to see the doctor for my required 6 monthly visits. I then went for SOME of the pre-op testing. And by some I mean that I had an ultra-sound, chest x-rays, and I had to drink barium. But I asked one of the ladies that was doing the testing if I was really supposed to be there, because like I said before, I hadn't seen a doctor regularly to even try to start the 6 months supervised diet. They then called the surgeons office, and I ended up not doing the EKG or the blood work. I will have to do that later. But if the surgeon's office knows all of this information then why did they schedule me to go? I still haven't heard anymore about my tests, but it was two weeks ago. I am really frustrated, because I know this is a long process, but it seems like with me it is taking extra long.

I am really looking forward to doing the exact opposite of all of the things I mentioned before. I haven't been buying new clothes, because I feel it is pointless to spend all of the money on something new and I won't be able to wear it for very long. Although my mom and sister are excited for me to have the surgery because they will get all of my hand-me downs. They are also happy for me because they want me to be healthy. I am extremely excited and I can't wait until my surgery, but I feel like the process needs to go faster!!! To me it sounds like they are trying to tell me that I can't start the 6 month process until I start seeing the exercise specialist, dietician, and nutritionist. But I have heard otherwise. If anyone has any input on any of the information I have mentioned just let me know. I am not all emotional about this, yet. I am just trying to put down everything that is going through my mind right now. I love to talk about this and read what everyone has to say.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know how you feel, Its never fun getting embarrassed cause you can't ride an amusement ride cause the latch won't go over your chest, been there before.. But I started in February with the approval of my surgeon and now its September and I finally will be having my surgery in 7 Days... but it took a lot of work dedication , I have lost 25 lbs on my own since I started and I have been to tons of class's, support meetings and all the lab works and it finally is paying off. I know you want it now cause thats how I felt, but it will happen, just be patient and go through all their steps... they do it for a reason. I wish you the best of luck! biggrin.gif

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Honestly? I'd start calling and hounding the surgeon's office to find out for sure if you HAVE to see all these people in order to start the six month clock rolling. My insurance didn't require all that additional stuff, just a seminar and a NUT meeting before sending off for approval.

Best of luck to you! I can tell you, only 2.5 weeks out, that even if I had to jump through all of those hoops, it'd be well worth it!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I called my insurance myself to find out what I needed for approval and looked it up on the internet. Sometime you can't go solely off of what your doctors office does. Many docs have additional requirements aside from what your insurance wants. I started my 6 mths w/ pcp before I even had a consultation with the surgeon. And I work for a hospital, my insurance is Aetna, so my company tweeked the requirements a bit, but its pretty much the same as the standard requirements. Be very proactive...I question everything the doctors office tells me to let them know I am doing my own research as well. I was upset about the 6 months at first (which is really 5 months with 6 visits), but their going by so fast, I have one more appt in October and I will be ready to apply. I have only lost 9 lbs....Good luck on your Journey and stay positive, to me this 6 months is a test!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well said Ready2bDone, well said. I also hate those thin vinyl chairs that gripped my ass and had to be pried off when I stood up. Rubbing my belly on the steering wheel even though I was already so far back my feet could barely touch the pedals.

We all wish you well in your pursuit pf WLS and hope you get an answer soon!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Being an inch from the steering wheel and barely able to reach the pedals.

Not even bothering to go to amusement parks anymore because it's so embarrassing to be sent off a ride for not fitting properly.

Being afraid to go out for dinner and being put in a booth that will not accommodate me.

Getting in and out of said booths.

Being asked to be an extra in a film, but do NOT want to have your fat self in a movie forever. Also, being afraid there will be no costume that fits you.

Not wanting people to take pictures of you and having your family pissed at you when you delete/destroy really bad photos of yourself.

Not going swimming because any thought of getting into a bathing suit terrifies you (and you don't even have one that fits anymore).

Wearing the same 3 pairs of pants because you simply cannot motivate yourself to buy the next largest size.

Not being able to put on sandals because reaching around fully to the left side of your foot is now a memory.

Not looking good in ANYTHING.

Skin problems that I am fairly sure that are related to obesity.

Being too tired to do ANYTHING after a full day of work that you used to love like taking care of the house, the garden ...

Being too uncomfortable and self conscious for sex (sorry if TMI).

Feeling guilty for over-eating.

Not being able to horseback ride because your neighbor needs you to be under 200 pounds for the horse's sake.

Be terrified of connecting with old friends because they will see you like ... this.

It really goes on and on ...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Skin problems that I am fairly sure that are related to obesity.

Yep, I had eczema pretty bad on my arms and back, they felt like sand paper. Since my weight loss it's all but cleared up, my arms are smooth and my back has a lot less scaly Patches and hard dried oil deposits - and I can actually reach around and touch dang near all my back too!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yep, I had eczema pretty bad on my arms and back, they felt like sand paper. Since my weight loss it's all but cleared up, my arms are smooth and my back has a lot less scaly Patches and hard dried oil deposits - and I can actually reach around and touch dang near all my back too!

I have eczema on my calves that will spread to the backs of my arms, stomach and back if I flare up. I also have rosacea. The dermatologists could find no cause, no cure and no real treatment. When I lost a lot of weight before, the skin problems went away.

One thing to add to the list:

Not being able to stand still for any period of time without back pain. I'm in a church choir and must stand through a large portion of the mass. I should be thinking about what's going on, but can't because I hurt.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

to add..

Not being able to bend over to shave your legs comfortably

Not wanting to go to a friends house for a BBQ without your own chair for fear they have those flimsey plastic ones

Not wanting to be a passenger in someones car for fear that you cant get in and out or wear the seat belt

Fear of going to a new place to eat that MIGHT have chairs with arms

Going to a physician's office and NOT being able to weigh because they don't have a digital scale OR chairs that fit obese people

Not being able to enjoy the beach because once you lay down it is a process to get back up without a small group of people helping you

Not being able to go deep sea fishing becuse a) there is no bathroom and B) nto enough "room" on the boat

Not being able to go to the bathroom on a plane (this might not be a bad thing for some lol)

Worrying about going to a bathroom where the tank is attached to the wall and you sit and you hear a "CREAK" in the wall.. (seriously- happened to a friend of mine in an airport in Colorado)

The list goes on and on and on....

Sad but true:(

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

OMG I can relate to just about all of this. Here are a few more things:

1. Increase difficulty wiping yourself - LOL

2. Acquiring cankles from excess weight

3. Not feeling comfortable getting a pedicure

4. Not being able to take a normal stroll to another part of the building I work in without my back hurting, shortness of breath, face on fire, sweating, etc

5. Difficulty tying my shoes with them on my feet

6. Even heavier and irregular periods

7. Not being able to date because you are fat

8. No one that has ever been obese/fat seems to understand what you are going through (Well stop eating fatty is not encouraging and hurts)

9. Being passed up for job promotions because you are fat (even though they won't admit it)

10. Fat/overweight (esp women) being typecasted or practically outlawed in Hollywood - why can't we have an honest mix of people of all different shapes, sizes, background, etc.?

11. Sympathy for an aneroxic person but hate for a fat one

12. Impossible to paint (and sometimes clip) my toenails

13. stretch marks and flab galore wrecking havoc on my body.

14. Feeling that surgery is my only option at this point to get the help I need. :Cry:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wow, I just want to cry while reading this..I can relate to almost all of it too. I have a few things to add to the list.

1. Developing rashes in places that sweat

2. I hate that it's so hard to keep my legs closed when I sit

3. I wish I could cross my legs

4. I wish I could be or feel sexy to myself and my husband

5. I wish I could wear my wedding ring, but it's too small now

6. Tough when your child says, "I wish you could play with me like you used to"

7. It would be nice to look all the way behind me when backing up in my car

8. No tolerance for heat so can't enjoy many summer activities

9. Afraid of falling because I probably couldn't get up

10. The moment when standing first thing in the morning, it's so painful since I've developed arthritis

11. My kids and husband being able to wrap their arms completely around me for a nice hug..been a long time

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can't get my wedding ring off anymore. They may have to cut it off if (NO, WHEN) I get the surgery.

You are my sisters and brothers. I pray for all of us to be healthy this time next year. Rootman, it looks like you are all but there already. You give us hope.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I too feel the pain of all of these things. I am soo happy I am getting sleeved on Monday, 9/19. It too was a long process. I went to one surgeon for a consult for lapband, they don't do the sleeve there. A friend I work with told me about her friend and gave me the name of the surgeon she went to. In the meantime, I went to my PCP to start my 6month supervised diet, because the original surgeon I saw told me this was a requirement from Aetna.

I went and met with my now surgeon, he told me which pre-op stuff I needed to get done and I banged them all out. I had to see a pulmonologist, nutritionist 3x, psych eval and an upper GI for the sleeve. In between I was going every month to be weighed by my PCP and we talked about diet and nurtition. The hoop jumping is finally over and I now have my surgery date, yay. I started this in Feb, and I never thought it would get here, but looking back it really didn't feel as long as it was. You are kept busy with your appointments, you start thinking about what you are going to look like afterwards, you start thinking about all the things you are going to be able to do after surgery and it flies by.

I found out through my surgeon that Aetna has 2 different plans I could have followed, I could have done the 6month supervised weight loss plan, or I could have done the 3 month pre-surgical prepartory program. I was already 3 months into my 6 month diet when I met him, but since I had to meet the nutritionist 3x, and hadn't done it, I had to stick with the 6month plan even though my surgeon considered it the 3 month surgical prep program.

Call your plan and ask what the requirement is, do they require the 6month plan, or is theirs only 3? Once you know that go see your PCP and have them document that you are interested in weight loss surgery, but is starting a supervised diet with your doc. Make sure you go every month to get weighed. Then call your surgeon and find out what tests he wants you to do , and start making the appointments. Also ask your surgeon if they have a nurtitionist at their office for you to see, if not call your insurance company and ask them to recommend someone in your network.

Also, on Aetna's website it said on there about me having to participate in an exercise program, I didn't do that. I mean I exercised at home on my eliptical and walked, but I didn't join a gym, I didn't have the extra money at the time because my husband was out of work. I don't know if that was an old requirement or I just got by because I also made my PCP document that I was working out at home.

Good luck, I promise that all the hoop jumping will be worth it in the end. don't let your insurance company discourage you, I swear sometimes I think they make is harder for us so we give up and they don't have to pay for the surgery.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×