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I was at the gym today and a man approached me asking me if I had gastric bypass surgery. Of course, I told him "NO" -- it is none of his business. I don't know him and I thought it was a really random thing for him to ask. But, I decided to ask him why he asked and he said "because of my body".. What?? I didn't realize that because we had surgery we fit some type of mold on our body type? OR do we? I left the gym wondering to myself, how could he possibly know?:drool:

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I would love to say that this guy was rude, which he might have been, and wrong, which I think maybe he was not. Before I got the surgery and I was seriously researching it, it seemed like I could suddenly "tell" who had had some kind of surgery. Sort of like when you are pregnant you suddenly see pregnant people everywhere. Now, I never went up to anybody and asked so I have no idea if I was correct in my assumptions. During a certain phase, maybe the rapid weight loss phase, we might have a certain look about us. Or hey, maybe this guy has been checking you out and having zero social skills used this assumption to start up a conversation. If he has seen you over time he might have noticed a rapid weight loss.

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Maybe he was inquiring becuase he is thinking about getting it done and that is his way of research??? I duno but I don't think people who have had surgery have a certain "look" to them

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No, I don't think we definitively have a look about us, but there were a few times before surgery when I saw a couple of people and thought that maybe they had had surgery. But that was only a couple of times, I look at all the photos here on the forum and I would never have known, looking at the pictures, that anyone had had surgery.

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Well, I was really taken back because I would never do such a thing... Just like asking someone how far along they are... What if they are really not pregnant? I would be mortified!

But, I just started going to the gym this week. Never seen him before. So, it was really weird. Oh, and he definitely wasn't checking me out -- he definitely had some "progesterone" if you know what I mean? lol

I would love to say that this guy was rude, which he might have been, and wrong, which I think maybe he was not. Before I got the surgery and I was seriously researching it, it seemed like I could suddenly "tell" who had had some kind of surgery. Sort of like when you are pregnant you suddenly see pregnant people everywhere. Now, I never went up to anybody and asked so I have no idea if I was correct in my assumptions. During a certain phase, maybe the rapid weight loss phase, we might have a certain look about us. Or hey, maybe this guy has been checking you out and having zero social skills used this assumption to start up a conversation. If he has seen you over time he might have noticed a rapid weight loss.

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Well, I didn't like it.. Since I started this journey, everyone I told about it looked down at what I was doing. They thought it was the "EASY" way out. Which I knew wasn't the case. This is a tool not a quick fix but nevertheless, I have been very careful about not really telling anyone. It is really no ones business! So, to have someone come up to me and ask me point blank without even a "hi, nice to meet you" "may I ask you a personal question" ... I mean really? Can you tell this really annoyed me?

Maybe he was inquiring becuase he is thinking about getting it done and that is his way of research??? I duno but I don't think people who have had surgery have a certain "look" to them

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Well, that guy was rude, lack of manners on his part. Maybe he seen you pre op, and noticed your new hot body, and thought no way without surgery!? I dunno but your right its none of his business. When I researched this, I didnt go around asking ppl if they had surgery. very random..

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Due to my research, and having friends that had surgery (RNY or Band) that I've known for years, I can pretty much be spot on with people that have had WLS. I think there are little signs that give away that I've had weight loss surgery, like the little skin on my neck, and the wrinkly skin on my upper arms, those are dead giveaways on WLS. Plus, when I see women in swimsuits, I can spot the scars, and the little tell tale signs that are pretty obvious to those of us that have had WLS.

That guy was rude, and obviously had zero tact. I would be willing to put money on it that he had surgery himself, and knows what to look for in other people. It was wrong, and disrespectful. Since I'm a smart-ass, I have been known to say "maybe, but you definitely need to have the DBGR procedure" Typically, they look puzzled and I say " you know the douchebag gene removal, yeah that would be perfect for you."

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Love it! I should of totally said that! But, I was totally off guard. I mean -- I don't wear anything revealing to the gym (sweats, and a tshirt) and it is hard to see my arms, necks because of my shirt sleeves and hair.. Oh, and I definitely do not show my stomach...

Maybe I am naive but I can't tell... I am really not that detailed when it comes to those types of things. I haven't told anyone! Not even my dad knows! I kept thinking -- maybe he saw me at the hospital when he was having surgery? lol -- it is a small world after all.

Due to my research, and having friends that had surgery (RNY or Band) that I've known for years, I can pretty much be spot on with people that have had WLS. I think there are little signs that give away that I've had weight loss surgery, like the little skin on my neck, and the wrinkly skin on my upper arms, those are dead giveaways on WLS. Plus, when I see women in swimsuits, I can spot the scars, and the little tell tale signs that are pretty obvious to those of us that have had WLS.

That guy was rude, and obviously had zero tact. I would be willing to put money on it that he had surgery himself, and knows what to look for in other people. It was wrong, and disrespectful. Since I'm a smart-ass, I have been known to say "maybe, but you definitely need to have the DBGR procedure" Typically, they look puzzled and I say " you know the douchebag gene removal, yeah that would be perfect for you."

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I was at the gym today and a man approached me asking me if I had gastric bypass surgery. Of course, I told him "NO" -- it is none of his business. I don't know him and I thought it was a really random thing for him to ask. But, I decided to ask him why he asked and he said "because of my body".. What?? I didn't realize that because we had surgery we fit some type of mold on our body type? OR do we? I left the gym wondering to myself, how could he possibly know?:confused1:

What a surreal moment that must have been for you! I'm not sure how I'd react in that situation. Probably :thumbup: with confusion!

Next time you see him at the gym, ask him! xxx

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Wwwwwow... whatta LOSER! Unfortunately, we can't control the extent to which some people are socially retarded. I probably would have asked him if he had a history of anabolic steroid usage, based on his bad skin, testicular atrophy, and gynecomastia... :confused1:

Move on, sister- this guy is his own WORST enemy. He'll get his, BELIEVE me.

He probably puts his foot in his mouth 20 times a day with perfect oblivousness. He has no social filters and probably hasn't given it a thought since. Time for you to do the same. Don't let an idiot rent space in your head. He is an inconsequential moron. Move forward.

Edited by pcindy

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LOVE IT!! I should have thought of that!

he needs a mouth bypass

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
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    • Doughgurl

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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