2 days to go and quietly freaking out

[educationrulz 18]

Well, I'll be having surgery on June 22, 2 days from now. I can't quite describe how I'm feeling but I'm definitely not totally calm and confident. I know I want and need this surgery but I keep having these weird flashes of "Can't I just do this on my own?" or "Do I really need to go get my dang stomach cut out just to lose this weight?" So far, I haven't talked myself out of it yet or picked up the phone to cancel the surgery, but I feel like I'm close to that sometimes.

I've been extremely busy this week and have barely had any time to log on and read posts this week. Maybe that's part of the problem because I usually feel better after that. But I'm in the middle of teaching a class and I've been cleaning my house like crazy all week because it's been kind of a mess. So, I really couldn't log on more.

My sister is coming with her kids for the week to watch my daughter and the dogs, so at least that part of things has been taken care of. I pretty much just need to go in, have the surgery, and recuperate. So what is wrong with me?!! :001_rolleyes: I feel like heading for the hills and forgetting that I ever started all of this! I know, totally crazy...

Any words of wisdom from those who have made it through these last minute freak-out sessions would be greatly appreciated.

[disp4so 3]

Hi Mary,

no words of wisdom here, but just wanted to let you know I am having surgery on the 22nd too. I am nervous and scared too, and I wonder to if I can still do it on my own.

I have lost over 100 pounds 3 times and various other lbs over the years only to gain it back. I think I have done more damage to my body with the yo-yo ing then just staying fat..

I am 41 and it gets harder each time, I know I could probably loose it again.. but can I keep it off is the question. I believe this will be the tool to help me keep it off, that is why I have decided to go ahead with it..

don't know if this will help you.. but just wanted to let you know you're not alone...

wishing you the best

Sherri

[pcindy 8]

"Do I really need to go get my dang stomach cut out just to lose this weight?" So far, I haven't talked myself out of it yet or picked up the phone to cancel the surgery, but I feel like I'm close to that sometimes.

I have no words of wisdom, just commiseration. It's 3:25am here and I'm ready to storm out the door to break this pre-op diet and just told my husband that I'm not going through with it. I'm very angry about the idea of doing this and worry that I will be mutilating myself irreversably, subjecting myself to nutritional issues for the rest of my life, that I'll be unable to nurish a pregnancy (so far, don't know of even one person who has had a successful pregnancy after this surgery), and that i'll have GI issues my whole life, taking Gas-X and lactase pills.

I doubt that this is what you want to hear, but I posted my own thread about having doubts and at least felt better that I wasn't alone in having them. Whatever you decide, I wish you the best.

[JudyM 2]

Dear Mary and Sherri - Here I am, also anxious about the 22nd!! All 3 of us on the same day!!

I have been busy fiddling about with this and that... I have made some Soup that I have pureed and put into the freezer in little bowls ready for 'thick liquid' phase! I've done the ironing, dusted and polished, and I have exfoliated, trimmed, tweezed, plucked and conditioned myself....

I go in to hospital tomorrow afternoon, then home again Saturday, they said - France does like to keep you in hospital a long time (if I can get out earlier, I will!).

I'm most anxious about the pre-med drowsy bit (I hate not being in control :001_rolleyes:) and the 24 hours after surgery. Other than that, I think I'm fine. I keep daydreaming about buying clothes in a UK size 12-14 instead of UK 22-24. Bring it on, I say!

Let's be gorgeous slim girls together - I want to rediscover my ribs and cheekbones!

'Bon Courage' as they say over here!! Go girls!!! :thumbup::thumbup:

[JudyM 2]

Cindy - I didn't mean to leave you out, but not sure when your surgery date is? Just hang on in there - you have come a long way already, and it would be a shame to make a U-Turn just now. Try and stay positive xx

[texaschick 0]

Those are all normal emotions. Right up until the day before I was ready to cancel. I finally realized I had gained and lost the weight so many times and that I was at the point in my life that losing wasn't going to get any easier (I am 50 and menopausal). I have bad arthritis in my knees and walking was becoming difficult. If I wanted a chance to enjoy my life, this was it! I am now 13 days out AND I FEEL GREAT! I was pretty hungry during the "clears" phase, but got over that quickly once I could eat some Soups etc. I already have more energy. My husband is starting to worry about me aquiring a transfer addiction - shopping!

Keep your spirit up ladies, you will get through this and on to a better, fitter, healthier life.

[carolyn24seven 11]

Hi girls, old timer here. (63) The shame of having to have your stomach cut out just to loose weight is mine also.

Let me tell you all this. Stop it. Stop the blame shame game right now.

I was so ashamed I would not even get in family pictures unless I was in the back. How could I let myself get that way?

I had lost the weight many times. I was even in a TV commercial for one weight loss deal.

Kept gaining it back + 10 of its friends each time.

It is the same story with minor changes for all of us.

I could not hurt my health anymore with yo yo dieting. My Doctor advised me to get used to my weight rather than loose/gain again because of what it was doing to my heart! CRIPES!

I finally accepted the fact that I needed permanent help with this issue.

That is where you all come in.

Do your research.

Make your decision based on what you find.

I did. I am just amazed at my life now.

I was 63 and waiting to just be done with life. I was ready for a walker/wheelie. Was having NO fun at all. Miseable.

Now, WOW. I am so grateful for this change.

I look at it like-some people get face lifts to face the world. I got sleeved to face the world.

I am so glad I did. I am surfing swimming walking dancing enjoying. Amen

So, stop beating yourselves up. If you have made the decision to do this based on your own good research. Have courage, God be with you. Strength will come. Positive.

[pcindy 8]

Thanks, ladies. My scheduled date is June 29. Don't know if they'll want to reschedule me since I haven't lost the full 5lbs/week on the liquid diet. Don't think I can go through it again if they don't keep this date. Good luck, all.

[JudyM 2]

I'm not ashamed of having this operation! I am actually proud of having identified a solution and taking positive action. As you say Carolyn, hiding at the back in pics is horrible. In my case, there are whole family holidays and occasions with not one pic to even show I was there! For me, that is where the shame lies; hiding away, feeling miserable and cross and guilty ..

PCindy - I can't comment on the pre-op loss. My surgeon didn't ask me to do it and said the pre-op diet wasn't necessary.... but you still have over a week to go, so you may manage a few more pounds off?

I am so motivated for this - I want to see my cheekbones, I know they are in there somewhere!!!

x

[lmmore 0]

Mary, You have been on this sight long enough to know what you are getting into. You are rightfully frightened right now, but you will be so much better when this is over. Get it done....gurl.

[educationrulz 18]

Mary, You have been on this sight long enough to know what you are getting into. You are rightfully frightened right now, but you will be so much better when this is over. Get it done....gurl.

Leave it to a man to just cut to the chase! :confused1: But you're right, I do know what I'm getting into and it's what I want. I appreciate everyone's thoughts on this and it is helping me come out of my fog. The point about KEEPING the weight off and not just losing it really hits home. And, I too am tired of aching joints.

I have actually started to calm down in the last half a day and I feel like I'm going to be ok. Despite my nerves, it's not in my personality to back out of something once I make up my mind. So, I'll definitely be at the hospital at 5:15 a.m. on Tuesday and I'll post an update as soon as I can after surgery. Thanks everyone!

[Jane_J 117]

I was going to write something but Carolyn wrote it much better. I accept that I needed this help to break the curse of overeating and now I feel wonderful, I can walk, climb hills, dance and party. I don't have to be taken places and 'parked' in the corner anymore. I felt really disabled before with the weight, the bad back, the asthma etc. Now I feel healthy and fit. This surgery was the only way I could find to get my life back, I am glad I toughed it out, through the cancellation due to a cold which nearly broke my heart because I had psyched myself up for the op. I had to do that bit twice in the end, but I would go through it again in a heartbeat to get to the place I am now. So please hold your nerves.

Load of love to you all,

Jane

Edited June 21, 2010 by Jane_J

[Jane_J 117]

"Do I really need to go get my dang stomach cut out just to lose this weight?" So far, I haven't talked myself out of it yet or picked up the phone to cancel the surgery, but I feel like I'm close to that sometimes.

I have no words of wisdom, just commiseration. It's 3:25am here and I'm ready to storm out the door to break this pre-op diet and just told my husband that I'm not going through with it. I'm very angry about the idea of doing this and worry that I will be mutilating myself irreversably, subjecting myself to nutritional issues for the rest of my life, that I'll be unable to nurish a pregnancy (so far, don't know of even one person who has had a successful pregnancy after this surgery), and that i'll have GI issues my whole life, taking Gas-X and lactase pills.

I doubt that this is what you want to hear, but I posted my own thread about having doubts and at least felt better that I wasn't alone in having them. Whatever you decide, I wish you the best.

Hi Cindy,

I am drug free now if that helps. I can't vouch for the pregnancy thing though as I am over 50 but I have read it is not only possible but more likely when your weight is more normal. I would imagine you would have to be structured in your eating during pregnancy but I don't think it would be a major problem. The doctors opinions are very positive on this.

Cheers,

Jane

[Besitos 0]

Mary, Judy, Sherri!!!!

JUNE 22ND for me too!!!! I'm quietly freaking out also. I've packed...gone over my tiny list 3874 times and am rehearsing in my mind what I have to do within the next 24 hours...drink the magnesium citrate, wash with the soap, Clear liquids only, yada, yada, yada.

I've gotten my brows done, pedi, mani, tweezed, shaved...LOL

*gulp*

Would it be too much to exchange telephone numbers??? I'd be willing to talk just to ease our anxieties and support each other. LMK!!!

Lovingly,

monica:blush:

[JudyM 2]

Hi to the 22 June girls! We are The Sleever Divas :confused1:

Couldn't resist a last quick peek on here.... it always leaves me feeling better :confused1:

If anyone wants to call me next week (remember I am on Paris time, which is GMT+1hr), you can get me via Skype (which is free) as judy-mansfield and I am the only one listed in France!

Let's meet up on here on Sunday, and compare notes!!

Lots of love, Bon chance et ? bientot! (Good luck, and see you soon!)

xxxxxx