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How do you handle your sleeve and dating. Do you tell them that you had surgery? If so, how long do you wait? If not, do you just keep it private?

Are you ever asked about your food choices/portions now that your stomach holds a lot less food and you cannot drink liquids?

I am sure many guys would just think that I am being a girl and like many girls just watching calories but I am sure along the way I will come across some curious guys who will ask. How do you handle that? Just be honest?

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Gotta tell ya... I'm a "straight up kinda gal"... and I make it known from the beginning....I just actually started really "dating" the last 4 months or so....but am very surprised at how supportive the ones I have told are. Or, have told me they had another g/f that had it done... etc.

The last guy I was dating had a motorcycle... and I was more embarresed about my knee surgery ( had a total knee replacement ) 'cause I had a hard time getting on his bike. But he was really sweet about all of it!!

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I waited to tell guys until I decided if I was going to need to tell them. It was a problem eating around them but I managed to stay under cover until I decided I would be eating around them a lot more often.

For me it's on a need to know basis. Most people don't know I had surgery. I recently told the guy I am seeing now cause we've been dating a couple of months now. He's been great about it. He said there are so many people having WLS these days, that it is not a big deal.I was kind of embarrassed when he saw some old pictures of me at my daughter's house.

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I just tell me people I'm a complete diet Nazi--end of conversation lol! They don't need to know why I'm like that.

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I just recently started dating after my surgery and meeting guys for lunch or drinks has been difficult considering not into either of those right now. I have been upfront with all of them and they have all been really good about it. If they cant take it than I dont need to be around them. Fortunately havent had to deal with that yet.

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for the most part now that I am almost 16 months post op, I know what to order and it looks like a normal portion. Yesterday I ordered quiche and ate all of it. I can eat salad pretty well and normally too.

going out to pizza-bad idea. I can eat one piece of pizza. I got out to pizza with my kids though!

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Just choose first-date restaurants that serve tiny portions like a sushi bar or tapas place or haute cuisine that serves thimblefuls of food on vast white plates. Or go for coffee, sipping is what we do.=) After the first date meet&greet, choose an activity for the second date that doesn't depend on food. The American Third Date is where the real information comes out anyway. At that point if you feel comfortable you could propose the activity of cooking together a recipe that you choose and you could use that time to explain it all to him.

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 0 replies
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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