So I fell that its time to update my progress since my last entry.

The pain is minimal from the ags and the incisions. dull stings and what feels like joint pain in the left shoulder. No I am not having a heart attack, no shortness of breath, sweating, difficulty breathing, etc.( for the medical folks out there).

I was out and about most of the day. can I over do it? thoughts.

So how do I get my 64oz of Fluid in a day? I'm taking in about about 48oz by bedtime. should I be taking bigger gulps? Should I be forcing fluids on a time schedule? What are your thoughts on the subject?

Sooooooooo, this was not in the brochure.

1. Commercials. Have you all noticed that TV commercials and for that matter TV in general promotes the heck out of overeating? Dominos, pizza hut Popeye's chicken, KFC, those stupid BurgerKing pieces and the best of them all Mickey D. I wanna punch Little Ceasar in the head! I'm not hungry, but I feel compelled to eat. Same way I did when seeing someone smoke on TV, Bogey would light up, I would light up. Thank God that's over with. 12 yrs smoke free. I may go back to radio all day.

2. The bathroom. If you have small children ofr have a weak stomach stop reading from this point foward. This is not to insult, inflame or gross anyone out. Biology started to work yesterday. Intestines started peristalsis, and last evening the Last Train from Clarksville came in. For those with potty training toddlers, thats number two.

Anyway, I know there were going to be changes, but no one told me about the new odors associated with this. First I offended myself, next the dogs scattered and hid in their crates, not to be seen again. My wife came to bed stating she was filing for divorce if I keep this up and finally, the smoke detector went off wanring the rest of the hosue hold there was danger ahead.

I rely on you folks to give me a heads up on these matters. you are my pals, confidants and friends. Why did you leave this little piece of info out? I afraid to go out in public. I may get arrested for terroists acts. I'll let this one go, but in the future please let me be aware of what to expect next. I have a family to feed.

3. sleep. Overnight I became my grandparents and my father. I am a night person. Mornings suck and now I know why. It's cold dark and lonely at 4 in the morning. Now I know why the early bird special is at 430pm. Bedtime should be @ 8pm. I went to bed last night at 10pm. Up at 4am and I feel great, but why is this happening. Dont tell me next I should be exercising at this ungodly hour.

Thanks for reading my rant. I feel much better now. will keep you updated with more observations and tips as I come by them.

More to come

sip and sip and sip some more........as in relation to me, as my swelling inside subsided, i was able to drink more and more (and became more hungry)...so it sounds as if you are right on schedule.....my left shoulder hurt really good for 4 or 5 days...def a 7 or 8 on a pain scale of 1 to 10....but it did go away......

yep on going #2, i still have clothes in my desk at work, just in case and the gas/farting etc....just call me jiffy pop...it is just part of my life now...i swear i just heard a duck.....did you??

ps, love your posts and i look forward to reading them

This sounds pretty normal, NJ. My kids thought they were in a terrorist attack once. It does stop, once your body gets used to the new regime but it does take some time. You are all of 2 days out - in a few weeks the unpleasantness should stop. My wife reminds me to tell you about scented candles and air freshener and to reduce the amount of nuts you eat and fewer artificial sweeteners. I can now laugh at the commercials that try to entice you to eat their stuff. Get stuck on a bite of pizza once and the temptation will go away. Although, the new fish bites look pretty good . . . I have a tough time with the water too. I fill a 64 oz container and pour out of that all day to see how I'm doing. The key seems to be sips throughout the day, if you can do that. I know you'll do great - once you see the weight coming off it will be a real inspiration! Don't forget to take pictures and measurements because you won't see the change unless you have something to compare the new you to. Hang in there!

Great thread and I'm having to refrain from laughing loudly at work. Thanks for the levity!

I imagine your wife will be equally happy with the tummy that rumbles really loud, especially once you get into bed at night. The burping that would make any 6yr old proud - that subsides but never goes away, and the constant need for stool softeners/laxitives...........good luck, you are doing well. Oh and the minor hair loss, but that should stop once you get your proteins up and in.

This made me laugh out loud as well!! Great post! I too was appalled when body gasses started actually speaking to me...loudly. It's like this band has a life all its own.

Your doing great! Love your humor.

PS: I am also aware of all the food commercials!! It's unbelievable....no wonder there is an obesity epidemic.

Good thing Bush isn't still president, the U.S. would have invaded your home by now searching for Mass Weapons of Destruction

Laughing with you all....just to funny.....

My poor dogs have been accused of passing gas so many times since banding

All I know is I make so many sounds an music from all orphases.

My two teenage (16,18). sons have been grading me on volume, pace, an pitch.

And i am PROUD to say My ave. is a B+

Although there is room for improvement scent is an A however volume is a C+/B at best ...

Thanks for the laugh.

I had my surgery in August of 2012. The thing that I notice most about the body noise movement department is this... after you start getting a few fills... your stomach will start making noises you have never heard. Like a concert in there!!! its not gas... but you will spend the first few weeks running to the potty, cause you think your gonna explode.. that's not it... its your port. My husband used to have conversations with it... when my port starts talking he debates with it like its a political party. ...... "But your stand on the economy is questionable... *gruuuuuuummmmmbbbbblllle* ... I OBJECT! hehehe .. welcome to the adventure of lapband!

What a great humorous relief to read today!!! From the commercials to the small boy band playing in my stomach all day, I can totally related to your post! I am amazed at the food commercials from 5:00-10:00 with high levels of calories and fat content. During the day it seems a little better with the yogurt commercials but still. It is everywhere you look. I am not looking forward to having a meeting with my staff and my stomach decides to have a Lady Gaga concert right there in the room!

Almost wet myself reading this. Thanks so much for providing a humorous spin to your daily trials! I'm going through some of the same stuff too!

Love your post! I'm two weeks post op and completely understand all that you're talking about.

About the commercials, i am not even hungry and i want what they are showing. I've had to change the channel quite a few times to avoid the evil Pasta and pizza commercials.

And all the noises coming from me now are quite entertaining for my kids but no one else seems to appreciate them

Ah, and you probably haven't gotten to ketosis yet (though you may have during pre-op)... You get to add rancid breath to the mix! It's hell getting beautiful and healthy, LOL.

It does get better. It is funny though that I notice just how "fat" our society is and why now. I used to enjoy (way tooo much) all the food commercials and now I notice how much unhealthy crap we shove down society's throats (literally). Then they offered me the lapband card (id card showing I have the band and have restricted eating). They said, many places will allow you to order from the kids' menu by showing this card. Heck no, I never really paid attention but most kids' menus are chicken fingers, pizza, mac&cheese, etc... No wonder kids are overweight too. Last but not least, many restaurants now post caloric content of menu items. I took my teenage daughter to Applebees and once in a while she will splurge and have a burger but usually opts for healthier choices. I ordered from the under 500 calorie menu and she opted for a burger. Later that night we looked online at her burger.. it was 1000 calories!!!! I asked her if she would have ordered it knowing that and she said no way! Granted we knew it wasn't healthy, but certainly didn't expect it was 1000+ calories!

Lastly, be glad your plumbing IS working and I recommend you do continue sipping Water and fluids. Not enough water and the limited Fiber you are getting now can cause for a VERY PAINFUL, AGONIZING, EXCRUTIATING, OH MY LORD pain you don't want to experience (or so I am told, lol).

Best wishes to you in your journey! It's all worth it!!

Oh my heck, LOL! This is so funny! My breath was so so terrible for awhile. LOTS of breath mints.

My soon to be 8 year old daughter told me I fart way too much, LOL.

It does subside a bit, but welcome to the Jungle!

2. The bathroom. If you have small children ofr have a weak stomach stop reading from this point foward. This is not to insult, inflame or gross anyone out. Biology started to work yesterday. Intestines started peristalsis, and last evening the Last Train from Clarksville came in. For those with potty training toddlers, thats number two.

Anyway, I know there were going to be changes, but no one told me about the new odors associated with this. First I offended myself, next the dogs scattered and hid in their crates, not to be seen again. My wife came to bed stating she was filing for divorce if I keep this up and finally, the smoke detector went off wanring the rest of the hosue hold there was danger ahead.

After getting banded I decided to invent a "Butt Muffler" and I am looking for investors if you are interested