I feel like I am lying so much that my nose is growing. I have chosen not to announce to the world that I am having surgey (7 people know) and I work in a small office where everyone knows your business. As well, I work in sales so there is tonnes of entertaining, lunches and dinners. So far today I lied to the Hr manager about my 'vacation' next week and how I will be taking the week to golf and close up the summer house etc. I have a lunch scheduled the 1st day back to work which I asked a coworker to attend and a gala the day after that, where I just put in my meal request for a cream veggie Soup, no lumps. (although I am sure if they put the filet on my plate, I would have a grand old time licking it.) I have declined a 'team' dinner on my first day back to work. It is also strange that I would be taking 'vacation' when we are sooooo busy.

My gig could be up soon if I don't remember my stories. I will eventually tell people I work with, but need to figure everything out first, for myself without people watching everything I eat or do or wanting to talk about it. I guess I could have just told people I am having surgery and that it is personal..........but I didn't.

Monday morning at 7:30am..........life will change just a little bit.

For me, I chose not to tell but 1 person and my family physician. Reason being, When I was first looking into it 2yrs. ago, I was asking family, friends and co-workers what they thought about it. And I was getting negative comments all over that made me feel really uncomfortable and fearful. For that reason, I gave in and did not go through with the process then. But after trying to lose weight again, succeeded and to re-gain again, I felt enough was enough and this time, I will do what I have to do for me and I don't need any one else's negative opinion about it.

I work with mostly women, and many of them gossip about anything and everything (instead of focussing on doing their job). I feel it's non of their business and don't wish to hear different people coming to me telling me what others are saying behind my back while they are doing the same. So I simply ask for 2wks vacation....at which the lady was surprise cause I rarely take vacations....and that's that, some are asking oh where are you going, I tell them, when I find out, I'll let you know....once I say that, they stop talking and keep it moving lol...People do not need to know about your personal business if you don't want it to be known.

Just read someones post about eating a pretzel to make a co worker happy. OMG thats one of the ways I got so fat eating when I wasn't hungry to please some one else. You know the clean plate club girl who never wanted to hurt anyone.

STOP STOP STOP. do not fall in to that . If someones that concerned with your eating and what and when and how much they are not concerned about you they want company on the fat road they are on or they want you to stay fat so they do not have to compete with you. Never eat to please anyone else ever. Usually I end with just sayin.. but I hope your are just listening...

Good advice to only eat when you are hungry...but a slippery slope to make assumptions about the motivations of others in the scenario you described about eating to please others.

If one maintains healthy and appropriate boundaries for themselves, then they don't find themselves in an unhealthy relationship dynamic to want to please others, or to even believe that pleasing others in matters of individual well being is an appropriate approach to relationships.

If one engages in interpreting the motives or thoughts of others, those thoughts are really only assumptions, and as such create communication which is often inaccurate and can result in hurt feelings or anger.

The better approach is for each of us to focus on what one knows they need to do for themselves...and if others don't agree, then that is their problem.

IMHO...your mileage may vary...