Tried to Talk Me out of the Band

[danaclark2 0]

Went to a local WLS support group meeting tonight. Out of thirty or more people, there were only two bandsters--three including me who has yet to me banded.

The leader of the meeting pretty much said I would fail at this band thing--that most banded she's seen convert to the RNY eventually. She said that most of the lap band folks are not happy with their slow weight loss--and she said that there are so many things that can go wrong--slippage, erosion, etc. She said that I'd have a higher chance of having more surgeries than if I were to have the RNY. She said that if I have a sweet tooth, then the band is DEFINITELY NOT FOR ME.

This bummed me out for a---SECOND--then I came to my senses. This is the best and safest way to go. Eventually, I am going to have to come to terms with the type of and amount of food I eat, and even if I were to get the RNY, I'd have to come to terms with eating sugar eventually. From what I hear, the "dumping" gets less and less severe as time goes on. I do have some what of a sweet tooth, but I don't care for sugary liquids at all. I do love cookies--cakes, etc., but I willing to say good-bye to them to regain my health. The main thing I'm looking for in the band is to help control real, physical hunger--not head hunger--but physical hunger--that's all my expectation of the band.

It just frustrates me that she (leader of WLS meeting) tried to talk me out of the band. She even mentioned how she's struggling with her weight gain (after 5 years out/RNY) and that she still vomits a lot--and that her teeth are chipping easily (possibly due to a mineral deficiency).

Ahh--I don't know. I just want SO BADLY to be successful. I don't expect a miracle cure. I just want help with this journey. Am I asking too much of the band for that--help to curb the ravenous physical hunger?

Thanks all for listening...

[Vera 7]

Just think of the anal gas that some of them get...for life.

I've heard that they have to wear carbon filters in their underware?

[danaclark2 0]

Oh, Vera--that alone would stop me from getting the RNY. How dreadful!

[Wheetsin 714]

That was inappropriate of her, especially if the information was unsolicited. Take it with a big grain of salt. Everyone on every diet is "right", and too many feel the need to educate the ignorant masses who don't do things their way.

There are pros and cons to every procedure out there. The "right" one is the one that you feel will work for you.

[Victoriana 10]

The gas thing is a true problem..There is a spray that can be carried in your purse to spray in the public bathrooms to eliminate the strange odor that is caused by food dumping. Just look at the stats on the death rates with all WLS. the band is safer by a looong shot. The slower weight loss is also kinder to you body giving it time to compact and saggy skin is less problematic ( it still can present a problem ) but not as likely.

Some people have to be correct all the time, even if its only in their mind. The Band is so healthy. Maybe she is bummed that she went with her surgery, or perhaps afraid that she didn't choose properly, even though all surgeries have their real benefits for individual cases.

You are an individual with the right to choose whats best for you.

[MsButterKup23 1]

I think you should find a different support group.

True Lap Band isn't right for everyone, but neither is RNY.

You need support, not someone making a decision for you!

Best of luck to ya!

[Boo 3]

Where did she get her data? It doesn't sound accurate or scientific, based on her experience. And the chipped teeth can come from too much vomitting. The acid destroys the enamel.

You wouldn't think you would have to defend yourself at a WLS "support" group, would you??

[3loves 0]

Hi Dana~ Were you "required" to attend a face-to-face support group? This is kind of scary and I'm wondering if you plan to go back? I know a team of wild horses wouldn't change my mind about getting the band, but I can't imagine actually going through what you experienced. She was so OUT OF LINE to say such things!!

This is very interesting to me b/c my surgeon is requesting I attend 4 support group sessions. I requested via e-mail for him to consider this site as my group support. I truly believe that a support group is in my best interest which is why I joined LBT. I stated that I would be one of the few, if not only, lapband patient (I'm still preband as you are) and I felt this site suited my support needs more than a group of gastric patients would. You see, they have not offered lapband in the surrounding cities and I'm traveling 3 hrs to Indy. I have not had a response so I was planning on attending a session tomorrow, Tues. :phanvan I'm still debating b/c it's in a bad part of town (I guess they're trying to save $$) surrounded by pawn shops, closed businesses, and the parking lot shares a driveway with a dilapidated collection of trailer homes. I don't think of myself above anyone else, but I do try to be cautious and aware of my surroundings.

You are doing the right thing by sharing this b/c members of your LBT family know the REAL truth about the band. So many people speak out of ignorance and do not know the real truth!! If you do ga back, encourage her to study her facts b4 she starts saying things that are untrue. Then again, people do "believe" different truths.

I will be on my guard if I decide to attend the meeting. Thanks again for sharing! Any suggestions on getting my surgeon to consider this site as enough support would be GREATLY appreciated. :clap2:

[CCBSTX 0]

I also went to my first WLS meeting before banding. Not only was I the ONLY potential bander present, there were NO banders at the meeting. After going around introducing ourselves, and me telling a brief synopsis, someone in the meeting "suggests" that I "rethink" the band. She gives me her side, as a RNY'er, how dangerous it is and potentional problems in car-accident, etc. Several folks were shaking their head in agreement.

I don't mind saying, that evening, I was pissed. I was ganged up for my decisions. The moderator was no help as well.

Last point: Most folks, no matter what WLS, would do their surgery again. It's human nature to think we've made the correct decision. I KNOW that I've made the correct decision for me!!!

Shawn

[gentlespirit 1]

I think her actions were toally inappropriate...especially when she was speaking from a position of no experience with the band and apparently not even bothering to get the facts straight. I don't think a support group is supposed to "badger" attendees about their choice but support everyone in their weight loss journey. I wouldn't go back, if it were me. This site was and continues to be such a great resource for me, and I feel that I went into my surgery with very realistic expectations due to what I had found here. Hopefully your surgeon will accept this as your support group. Good luck!

Emily

[shackdog 1]

Pre-banded and excited to be getting the band, I looked at both for a very long time, yes its a personal decision but after looking at the facts,I know that this is the right way for me,

God bless and good luck with what ever choice you make

[Sunta 4]

Hi,

With regard to the RNY, I don't want to put down any surgery if it helps people, but let me say this: every single person (and I mean every single person) I told I was having weight loss surgery said a variation of the following: "You're not having the bypass are you? Because my cousin/sister/friend/friend of a friend DIED from that!" Seriously, what other surgery do you know of where EVERYONE knows someone who died from it? I just read an article about how the death rate from the RNY has been under-reported for years and instead of 1 in 200 it's more like 1 in 100. I'm sorry, but that's waaay too high for me! Are there risks associated with the band? Yes, there are, but to the best of my knowledge, the vast majority of them are fully treatable. Even if it means getting the band removed, well then at least your stomach will be the same as it was before. The RNY seems very barbaric to me but that is just my opinion. I have heard sooo many horror stories about it. I don't expect my band to be permanent for the rest of my entire life, but for as long as I have it, I am going to make the very most of it. I took a calculated risk and am cautiously optomistic it's going to work for me. If it doesn't, I can have it removed. Maybe it would help you to look at some of the polls on here about how many are totally happy with their bands. When I was trying to decide whether or not I should get the band, those polls sealed my decision for me. Good luck with whatever you decide!

[NeenBand 7]

I went to my gyno today and told him of my banding. He was very supportive of the band. He was talking about the risks associated with the bypass. He was telling me he was just through with a surgery when one of the other surgeons asked him to assist with a bypass that just came into the ER. Part of his bowel had died. He said witjin 2 hours, that man would have died.

But he said what was even more serious is the state of the re-routing, they could not figure out how to get the bowel stiched back so everything flowed in it's natural direction because it was such a mess in there. He said the surgeon he assisted was the best on staff too. (He was not the surgeon who did the bypass) He also said it sometimes doesn't matter how good your surgeon is, it's such a serious surgery the body may just not take to it. ANd he mentioned most seem to gain weight back even after all of that.

What is this about car accidents?

[3loves 0]

I attended my first support session tonight after being required to attend 3 by insurance per psychologist (started anther thread about that). I was brave enough to raise my hand and ask if anyone else had the band or was getting it. Anyway, I was the only "band" person there out of 35 to 40 people.

There were really nice and respectful, but I didn't feel it was a benefit to me to discuss hair loss, smelly gas, and such. A lady that was pre-surgery asked me why I chose the band and I told her a few of my reasons and said gastric or band were personal decisions and I was doing what was right for me. I didn't get any flack and I didn't feel out of place. It was a nice group except for the fact they were all gastric. I was ready to load the guns and shoot, :heh: but I was pleasantly surprised after what you had experienced Dana.

[danaclark2 0]

3loves,

I'm glad you had a good experience. My experience wasn't all bad--it was mainly the leader of the group who was so persistent in her opinion of the band.

One girl (who had had the gastric bypass) who I spoke with said that her sister had the band around the same time that she had had the bypass and that her sister had lost 160lbs in about 18 months.

I know the band is the best decisions for me. I'm so excited!