Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Family Is Driving Me Crazy!



Recommended Posts

Anyone else find that their family drives you crazy after being banded? My wife east anything and everything she can in front of me and my boy is just crazy to begin with.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You are probably feeling overly sensitize to food stimulus and your wife is just going about life as she did when you were pre-band. Have you talked to her about how hard it is for you right now to see her eating these things you (probably) like and what any alternative solutions would be?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's too bad. Fortunately my husband is very supportive and prefers to eat healthily anyway. We share the cooking and both aim to prepare meals that are band-friendly and healthy. He just gets larger portions than me.

Maybe you could take a turn at cooking and do the same? Good luck.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sorry to hear. My husband was very sensitive about this. For the first week him or my boys wouldn't eat in front of me it is kind of funny now but we are all eating healthier now because of me being banded. If it is really bothering you then you need to be honest with her.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone. I'll have to try somethin different

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

And they are at it again... Fml

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I dont sounds to me as if you need to sit down with her and explain how you are feeling. I would not be able to live with someone who is going to throw food in my face and make me feel like ****. Sorry you are going through this i hope it gets better! Just remember why you did this and if nobody is there for you because of it than atleast you have us to keep you on track!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

And they are at it again... Fml

I definitely sympathize with you here, but you need to ask yourself if this is a new thing, or if they've always eaten like this and now you're super aware of it? Sometimes I wish families got it and understood the need for a little more discretion, but they don't always see the problem. Especially if you are expecting them to change because you have...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My husband does the same thing, so I sympathize with you. I've been trying to lose weight on my own for quite some time before turning to the band, but he's always eating his chips, fast foods, sodas, etc... It seriously can be nerve wracking sometimes (I literally started crying when we were grocery shopping for a bbq - he was putting so many junky delicious things in the cart and all I could have was chicken...), but he doesn't even realize he's doing it. I've talked with him about it a few times, and now he is pretty good about making better food choices, especially if I'm already stressed and wanting to emotionally eat. He's also picking up on terms such as head hunger, which is really helpful (yet slightly annoying) as well. I'm sorry that it's happening, but hopefully will change!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My husband has been completely supportive, but he doesn't really understand how my world of eating has changed. I'm eating to live, not living to eat anymore.

He sees that I don't eat the same stuff, but the other day asked me to grab the Oreo's from the cupboard while I was in the kitchen for him. My response was: you're putting temptation in my hands, so no, if you want them get them yourself. He instantly appologized, he didn't even think that it would be hard for me. I'm trying very hard to be strong - but really, putting them in my hands and NOT having one would be torture. Sometimes I just have to *kindly* point out that I'm really trying here, and ask him to just think a little more before he talks. I don't want him to feel like he has to eat in the other room, because I do really enjoy the few meals we get to spend together, but don't ask me to make you Pasta, scoop some ice cream, etc. It's like asking a recovering alcoholic to grab you a beer. He was very receptive.

I suggest maybe just explaining that you're on a learning curve, your life has changed when it comes to food, and the temptation is strong to not eat according to plan when you see them chowing down pizza in front of you. At the same time, this was a choice you made and need to prepare yourself for a lifetime of tempting situations.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've already laid down the law to my husband about bringing 'certain' foods in the house. You know the ones that got me in trouble in the first place. of course its not healthy for 'either' of us. He will just have to deal with it. We are a team and have to work together. I am lucky I have NO kids in the house and when my granddaughter comes to visit she has her very own 'little' single size Snacks. Its bad enough I will have to learn to be around foods when I attend family functions or events, but NOT in my house.....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×