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Food Obsession.....does it ever stop?



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Ok, just for background, I do not have my band yet. But as a person who has been overweight for about 25 years I have been on and off diets for all of my adult life. My best success was with Weight Watchers, I lost 75 lbs, got to goal and lifetime. HOWEVER I did gain it all back and then some. MY question is that on WW you count points , track food, weigh and measure, and exercise to earn more food, plan the next meal etc.. You sort of trade one obsession ( over eating ) for another: counting, recording and obsessing about the next meal ( do I have enough points for THAT?) From reading the boards it appears to me you still have to count calories. track food intake and exercise and therefore obsess about food. I mean I think about what I am going to eat, how much I ate and blame myself for not stopping from the time I wake up until I go to bed. I have even dreamed about it! So my question out there is : Is there any hope to just become a person who eats when hungry , stops when satisfied ( not full ) and does not think about the next meal?

My desire ( hope, dream , expectation) is that when I get banded, and have a few fills and find the "sweet spot" will the habits gained convert to a normal relationship with food? I do not expect this overnight, but in a couple of years maybe? Or if not any suggestions on how to live with it and not play the blame game? Thank you in advance. I know there is some good insight out there. Ann

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Hi Ann,

Well I certainly know what you are talking about and this was one of the questions I asked when I went for my consult. I was told that I would not need to count calories after being banded. Just follow the guidelines and make the right choices. Now I do not have much experience yet, I was banded this past monday, but I will certainly take their advice. My clinic doesn't want me to trade one obsession for another. I will follow the post-op diet to the "T" because I want to heal as safely as I can. But no where in their guidelines is the need to count a single calorie or log anything. As like you, I know I can count points, calories, etc and log everything I put in my mouth. And I know I can lose weight with this method. I also know I am not successful in the long run doing that. My father always says the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. You have to do something different is you want different results. Well this time I am not going to do the same old things I have always done to lose weight. I will rely on my clinic to give me the support I'll need and my band to help me with Portion Control. My goal in all of this is to lose the obsession with food! I stopped logging and counting the first day of my pre-op diet August 1, I have lost 12 pounds since. I'm happy with these results and I am enjoying not being "full" all the time. And most of all, it's like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

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Ok, just for background, I do not have my band yet. But as a person who has been overweight for about 25 years I have been on and off diets for all of my adult life. My best success was with Weight Watchers, I lost 75 lbs, got to goal and lifetime. HOWEVER I did gain it all back and then some. MY question is that on WW you count points , track food,weigh and measure, and exercise to earn more food, plan the next meal etc.. You sort of trade one obsession ( over eating ) for another: counting, recording and obsessing about the next meal ( do I have enough points for THAT?) From reading the boards it appears to me you still have to count calories. track food intake and exercise and therefore obsess about food. I mean I think about what I am going to eat, how much I ate and blame myself for not stopping from the time I wake up until I go to bed. I have even dreamed about it! So my question out there is : Is there any hope to just become a person who eats when hungry , stops when satisfied ( not full ) and does not think about the next meal?

My desire ( hope, dream , expectation) is that when I get banded, and have a few fills and find the "sweet spot" will the habits gained convert to a normal relationship with food? I do not expect this overnight, but in a couple of years maybe? Or if not any suggestions on how to live with it and not play the blame game? Thank you in advance. I know there is some good insight out there. Ann

When you are at the right level (fills) of your band where you don't feel hungry and get that satisfied feeling after eating, the obsessing will decrease. I can't say that it will totally go away because food addiction is like drug or alcohol (I'm a recovering alcoholic) addiction that really never goes away. But, the band will help you stop overeating when you eat the right food. Of course, it can't stop you from eating bad food like chips, ice cream, or Cookies because those just slide on through.

I found that when I've eaten until I'm satisfied and don't get hungry for a couple, three, sometimes four hours, I don't think about food. I'll look at the clock and tell myself, 'hey, it's getting close to lunchtime, see what the cafeteria is having or decide what salad you want'. Not the old discussion I used to have in my head 'Ok, I just finished Breakfast, what do I eat next; no I can't eat that quickly after Breakfast I have to wait a until lunch; that's too long to wait, blah, blah, blah'. You get the meaning.

Getting head banded is just as important as getting lapbanded in that you are going to learn how to eat to live and not live to eat. It's going to be a long process, but well worth the effort.

J.

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Thank you so much . I do like th insanity analogy. It is so trure. I am going to follow your advice, and just take one day at a time and work the band! Thank you again I feel so much better!!!

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I've been banded just over eight months. At first I was a bit obsessed with my food management, because I didn't know how to live with my band. There is a balance required to ensure you get enough proper nutrition to stay healthy, while allowing your body to lose the excess weight. That process makes it important to understand what you're putting into your body, and how much of it you're burning off. So yes, you'll need to count calories somewhat, track what you're eating, and keep up your exercise.

Having said that, nowadays, I don't obsess. I *KNOW* when I'm eating something I shouldn't, and something I should. I have my daily portions sorted out to the point that I can generally tell how much is enough, and how much is too much. I don't weigh, measure, or fixate on calories. I use my weight loss as a way to track my daily intake, and activity. If I eat too much, or the wrong kind of food, my weight loss slows, and may even stop. I never let myself gain more than a few pounds without refocusing on what I'm doing. Those extra pounds go away within a few days, and I'm back on the weight loss track. As my weight loss continues, I'm aware of what I've been doing to lose that weight, and I keep doing it.

Ultimately, I take COMPLETE responsibility for what happens with my band, and my weight loss. I do not expect my band to do all the work while I eat anything I want. Whether I obsess about counting calories (never my thing, so I don't, beyond a general idea of what I eat in a day), or how much I exercise (I try for at least an hour of physical activity every day - rapid walking, recumbent bike at the gym, treadmill work, or even light weight training), and I try to focus on living my life in a way that males me feel good about what I'm doing for myself.

It takes a bit of planning to stay on track every day, but no way would I consider it an obsession. Certainly not in the sense of how WW turns you into a calorie fanatic. I just don't have time for that. If I want to eat something outrageous, I eat SOME of it. I don't need much, and my band reminds me that I don't need to eat a lot of something to enjoy it. And then I move on. If I blow my eating plan one day, I refocus and get back on track the next. It's all about moderation. As someone once told me, "The sin is not in falling, it's in not getting up."

Good luck with your journey!

Dave

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I was SO worried about this pre banding. I;m a bored eater, and i'm frequently bored. I was worried about keeping myself busy without spending money.

At first it was really hard to get out of the habit. I'd occasionally snack on sunflower seeds - low carb and kept my hands and mouth busy :o) I still struggle inj party settings with the crap that is served. Prefer to hold them at my house so i can control the food. But overall, If i have an insane crazing i eat it,. but just a little compared to what i used to eat. Best trick is to keep it out of the house.

I now try to think of other things. I actively ask myself "are you hungry, or do you want to eat". And that's helpful. I find something to do everyday. I walk, garden, clean. Something, anything to be busy.

As far as transferring obsession...lol I've discovered word feud on my phone. Can't out it down :o)

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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