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Things I am scared of.....



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Well, first off I am getting more and more comfortable with the reality of this. I still haven't brought myself to tell my mom. She has been on my case for 10 years to lose weight. I don't know how she will take it. I have a feeling she will be upset and then tell me to grow up, buck up, and do it myself. Blah, blah, blah. It is just who she is.

Anywho-things I am scared of:

1. Dying from WLS

2. Being put under, deathly afraid of that.

3. Becoming an alcoholic afterwards or some other addict.

4. Telling people that I am doing this.

5. Acquiring a shopping addiction after I lose weight.

6. Excess skin, my mom had a Tummy Tuck and I don' want to go through that!

7. What will happen to my marriage, because I hear all these rumors about people getting divorced.

8. Drinking alcohol afterwards and puking.

9. Having to exercise, although when I do it I like it.

No others right now. Peace, Liz

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i can relate to #'s 1,4 and 5!

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I'm terrified of puking too. It seems like it would be harder and puking is bad enough when you have to stick your head in a toilet bowl and wretch! I am afraid of getting "stuck" even though I am planning on being super careful about what I eat. I am also afraid of all of the lose skin afterwards. I am afraid of having to go to work and do my job on the liquid diet that comes after the surgery for those first few weeks. I am afraid I just won't have the energy to do it.

I hear ya, I have some fears too!

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I think all that's natural-it means you're not going into this blindly, which is a good thing. But, what you really need to ask yourself is how happy you are with the excess weight? For me, I think about it every single day- it sucks the life force out of me in many ways. I know I can be a more active and energic person without the constraint of being overweight. I hope my new addiction will be exploring all that life has to offer-I thought the post "Skinny Bucket List" was a good one. With all that being said perhaphs the most important thing is the health benefits-reducing your risk of cancer, heart disease, etc. Keep your eye on the prize.

Being inspired! Find quotes to post around your house, on your mirror, etc. - Keep positive thoughts and positive people around you!

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor, catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."~ Mark Twain hline.gif

"Progress always involves risks. You can't steal second base and keep your foot on first. "~ Frederick B. Wilcox hline.gif

"Do one thing every day that scares you."~ Eleanor Roosevelt hline.gif

"Risk more than others think is safe. Care more than others think is wise. Dream more than others think is practical. Expect more than others think is possible. "~ Cadet Maxim hline.gif

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your list of fears sounds LOT like mine, for the most part. I,personally, am not going to tell my mother. luckily, there is some distance between us, about 1,000 miles, so i won't have to see her or anything for months. unless i die, she won't know about it. that's my plan anyway. i have added some comments below to your original list.

Anywho-things I am scared of:

1. Dying from WLS--i am scared of this too, but i have just decided that at the end of the day, i trust my surgeon. he has done over 7,000 of these surgeries and not one person has died from it on his table. that puts me at ease. ask your surgeon what his track record is if that will help you.

2. Being put under, deathly afraid of that.--Gawd, i'm scared of that too. but i have been doing tons of research on this site and everyone has said that one minute they are mid conversation and the next thing they know they are waking up on recovery. i am sure that it is most likely the same for the majority of people. i'm still scared, but i will just tell myself to breathe.

3. Becoming an alcoholic afterwards or some other addict.-no real words of comfort here as my only addiction is currently food! if you don't have a problem with alcohol now, you shouldn't have a problem afterward. you aren't going to be able to just drink and drink and drink because you will get dehydrated, and you have to put so many ounces of fluids in, there won't be room for bottle after bottle of Jack. just tell yourself that. try to get a hobby or find something you like to do and do more of that.

4. Telling people that I am doing this.- there is nothing that says you have to tell anyone about this. as difficult as it is, i am keeping this to myself until i am either ready or i feel that i can share with someone. this is something i am doing for myself and it's not for anyone else. i know others say it's nothing to be ashamed of, and it's not, but it's MY body and what i do with it is MY choice and I don't want anyone else's opinion unless i ask for it. make sure you are ready to tell before you tell. that's all.

5. Acquiring a shopping addiction after I lose weight.- yeah, i feel you here. i suppose if you spend the money on clothes instead of food, that's a good thing. i'm pretty frugal in my fat life, and i plan to continue that, so it just depends on your personality.

6. Excess skin, my mom had a Tummy Tuck and I don' want to go through that!-i'm gonna have lots of this...if i lose enough weight to have to deal with it, then i will deal with it.

7. What will happen to my marriage, because I hear all these rumors about people getting divorced.-if your marriage is strong and loving right now, then you will have nothing to worry about. if you married your husband because you love him and not just because you thought he was the only one who would ever be with someone fat like you, then your marriage will be ok. if your husband loves you just how you are, and doesn't see you as fat or thin, then your marriage will be ok. ask your husband how he feels about all of this, and ask him about how he will deal with things when you are thinner. keep the communication open and be honest with each other. if you can do this, your marriage will be ok.

8. Drinking alcohol afterwards and puking.-start off slowly. everything in moderation. try drinking a small amount and not the whole bottle. listen to your body and see what it can tolerate.

9. Having to exercise, although when I do it I like it.-find something to do that doesn't seem like exercise. maybe invest in a wii or something that feels more like a game. for me, it's riding my bike and swimming. it doesn't feel like exercise. i love to do it. you just have to find that one thing that gives you pleasure that doesn't seem like a chore and do it. as the weight comes off, maybe you will find other things that will become more fun for you.

i wish you the best of luck in whatever you decide. but just know that there are others, myself included, who are still scared and unsure. regardless of my fear, i am going through with this (my surgery is May 4th) and i'm going to do my best to heed my own advice. whatever you decide, it will be the right decision for you. don't let anyone, your mother included, tell you that you are lazy or stupid.

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i just had my surgery on friday and i had a lot of those same fears... mostly the stupid breathing tube! but trust me one minute u r awake and fine the next minute u r out cold and wake up in recovery and it's all over! trust your sergeon he/she knows what they are doing and will make it the best possible for you. good luck to you i know you will do great!

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i just had my surgery on friday and i had a lot of those same fears... mostly the stupid breathing tube! but trust me one minute u r awake and fine the next minute u r out cold and wake up in recovery and it's all over! trust your sergeon he/she knows what they are doing and will make it the best possible for you. good luck to you i know you will do great!

Congrats! Glad to hear all went well!

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I actually joined this site as a supporting spouse. My husband is having his surgery tomorrow and I am optimistic that this will be the answer. He has struggled for most of his adult life. A former football player who was encouraged to eat as much as possible worked when he was playing. Once he was no longer on the field, the eating habits were the ones that stuck, not so much the workout. I joined the website so I would have a way to communicate with others that have gone through the surgery and know what to expect post-op. It is natural to be apprehensive about any invasive procedure, so hang in there and do this for you!

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I also haven't told my family not that I am afraid to just don't have much to do with them . My fiancee is all for this and hopes it boosts my confidence. I have told my Boss and Supervisors as I am required to do heavy lifting and won't be able to for awhile :D . I am not afraid of the extra skin and all that my insurance pays for all reconstructive surgery afterward !!!!! So thats another thing for me to look forward to !

I am afraid I'll still want to eat.

I am afraid of the breathing tube .

I am afraid of the facility being clean .

I am afraid of the pain .:unsure:

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I am the biggest chicken of all and I made it through and so will all of you. Just relax, if your marriage is strong weight won't change it. You will still want to eat, heck we are human, but that is where your will power will come in. Also if you do vomit and not everybody does it is not that bad and you can control that by chewing chewing and chew some more. Stress is not good for your mind or body and you want both to be in good shape for surgery. Relax!!!!

Cheri

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Obesity surgery have become very common now.You can get very good results so do not scared just face it then you can be happy in the future.

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I absolutely loved your quotes NJgirl32. I'm going to be using them myself. Thanks.

Now fears, talk about it. My greatest fear is to have fear. I am concern with must of your fears but those are less than not enjoying the rest of my life becausey weight issues.

We can do this guys. In a year we will be skinny, healthy. and fearless. :)

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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