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You need a new Doc. POSTHASTE. What a A$$. Easy for him to *blame* you for the failures of HIS surgery! Easy for him to say! It sounds like the same rhetoric that I've heard about diet failures for years..now transferred to Band. Now, as far as how to fix, I'd read here what people tell you and try to work it for a while. I myself am deciding on Band vs Sleeve, so I can't give advice. But, tell you, it isn't your fault.

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I'm just wondering what youre simple rules are that have helped you lose 100lbs. I also am busy, don't have time to track or write everything down, and I'm having a hard time getting enough Protein. I had the surgery on November 16th and am down 42lbs, which doesn't seem like much to me compared to others who I know. I'm starting to see the difference in my appearance and I have more energy but I still struggle.

When was your surgery? Do you exercise?

42 pounds is great! At that rate you will drop 100 pounds in less than a year! You just had surgery this past Nov.? It's only the end of Jan. Wow, that's a lot of weight to drop. Maybe you are having the feeling I had of wanting every single pound gone yesterday! It will come off.

I do not exercise. I should, but I don't. I'm not saying it is the correct way to do it, I'm just being honest.

I had my surgery July 2009. I lost 100 pounds in the first year and then about a pound per month after that.

Some of my simple rules are:

Take my vits. every day

Stop eating one bite before my full signal even if there is one bite left on the plate (this takes time to master)

Stay away from things like candy bars....

Drink Protein shakes. I also like the smoothies from starbucks and have them add extra Protein. yummy. They already use fat free milk.

Stay busy on the days I have head hunger. I sew, craft, quilt.

Don't skip meals

Snacks are ok if I need something between meals. cheese stick, yogurt, skinny latte from starbucks (90 calories)

Eat chili (great source of protein)

find sweet spot and stay there..... very important to my success

I don't count, measure or track anything. I don't obcess about weightloss every minute of every day. I just can not live that way.

I do not think of this surgery as something I have done to punish myself for getting morbidly obese. I like to think of it as something I finally did for myself as a gift to ME. I still go out to eat often and I socialize even more now that I feel better about the way I look. Just lastnight my husband and I met at Chili's on the way home from work. I had a nice glass of white wine while I waited for him. I ate a very yummy bowl of Soup while he had a full rack of ribs and french fries. I did not feel cheated in any way. We had a nice dinner and didn't have to cook.

just back to add to my post.........

more simple rules:

I stay away from fried food....far away

I make sure every bite is well chewed before it goes down the hatch .... not overchewed to a liquid state, just well chewed.

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I have had a similar situation. I had the original band done in Feb 2004. My highest wt was 280, I started to process at 267, day of banding I was 240, I lost down to 208 pretty rapidly but then lost momentum and stablized out at 220. Was so ashamed of gaining that I quit going in for fills. By end of 2005 was at 230. In 2007 was having reflux and forced to go back to see doc. She was extremely harsh with me. Why don't people who have never had weight issues understand that criticism of obsessive overeaters is never constructive and always harmful. Turns out my band had slipped and had to be repaired. Got a fill right after that. Still didn't lose wt, and again ashamed to go back. Gained to 235-240, joined Weight Watchers in Jan 2008, lost 15 lbs right away, then fell off wagon and gained it back and although I kept going to meetings for 2 yrs, just never could master the hunger (both real and head). Ihave an extremely stressful job and harsh working environment but with this economy, I cannot leave. I also support my elderly mother in an assited living facility. My boss is harrassing me about my weight and I am terrified I will lose my job.

I called the surgeon's office and asked to see a different doc whom I had met at support groups and who seems very compassionate. I was so desparate I wanted to have my band removed and go to bypass. Just met with new doc on Monday. He wants me to have a fill and meet with a dietician. He says the diet has changed a great deal since I had my band in 04. It now focusses on Hi Pro and Low Carb. So I am going to do that. Will give it a try.

I am not great at exercise. I find it boring (aerobics) I like lifting weights. But currently am too poor to afford a trainer. I previously had some luck with Wii and am having my son in law come over this weekend to help me re appropriate my spare bed room as an exercise room with my treadmill, yoga mat and Will. And I am here at this website to garner moral support. So "sheer frustration" I will be there for you and hopefully you will return the favor.

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Your doctor was rude and you were there looking to get back on track and that kind of attitude is not helpful. I'm sure he was trying to be tough hoping to get a commitment out of you but that can backfire. I suggest another doctor or go back in two weeks and make that commitment and prove to Dr. Rude that you can do it!!

Good Luck to you and I hope you get that fill!!

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Your Doctor was absolutely correct on EVERY point - maybe could have been more diplomatic about it - but nevertheless correct

You have had 3.5 years to get this right - and in that time you did not. You make excuses about lifestyle and how busy you are but you never once admit that you did not try to make it work

You admit that you have nor followed up with a doctor for over a year - even though you knew you needed advise, help and support

Dont ever dare to blame the doctor for that - Doctors are NOT mind readers - they can only work on what is presented to them and you did not present anything for over a year (probably longer)

So girl - get with the act - follow your doctors orders and make a decision about your fat life versus your thin life

And if anyone thinks Im being harsh - well perhaps I am. Dont blame anyone except yourself for failure

To Sweetgrace who made the comment "Your doctor sounds like an absolute jerk and obviously male." Grow up and think before you open your mouth. In my experience most of the biggest bitches in the medical profession are female

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Sounds like you have quite a support system going here. But I totally understand. I was banded in August of 08 and once I found my sweet spot so to say, i had dropped 50 pounds by December, but my birth control failed me. So due to pregnancy I had a lot of my band unfilled because my last fill had caused me to be a little too tight and I was concerned with morning sickness and getting enough protien, etc. Well needless to say I gained ALL my weight back during pregnancy and after lost some of the weight but not all. and now am at a pretty stable 245 which is about 20 pounds less from my original weight. I haven't had a fill in over a year. I had 2 after my pregnancy but they were probably 4 months apart with absolutely no restriction or change, Plus I was not mentally prepared to make the change but was pushed to get fills by my husband. Mind you we no longer had insurance so fills were a little more than we could afford, hence the space in between fills. Now fast forward a little more than a year later, and I a fed up. I am scheduled to have a fill in a week. Very excited and nervous, because I too feel like a total failure and I don't know what to expect. I am starting a liquid diet in the morning to help me mentally prepare somewhat before I get my fill, something I did not do before. I agree with the others though, you need to find a doctor that will be more supportive, but also need to be sure this is what you are ready to do. After my experience last year and knowing that I was not mentally prepared to start my lap band life style, I know this is something you need to really want. So what, you have 6 children, i am a very busy mom too but I think we can do it. I know this time around I have found a support group that i will be attending, I need that accountability. My thing is I was doing so well with diet and all right before my pregnancy that now, I have forgotten where to start and how to eat etc. I wish you luck on your new journey. If you really want you YOU CAN DO THIS!!!

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You need a new Doc. POSTHASTE. What a A$. Easy for him to *blame* you for the failures of HIS surgery! Easy for him to say! It sounds like the same rhetoric that I've heard about diet failures for years..now transferred to Band. Now, as far as how to fix, I'd read here what people tell you and try to work it for a while. I myself am deciding on Band vs Sleeve, so I can't give advice. But, tell you, it isn't your fault.

I have to disagree with the post above. The surgeon certainly has every right to blame a non-compliant patient. The surgeon is a SURGEON, not a Svengali who can magically make the band work even if the patient might not be doing all the right things. I am so sick of reading posts (many, many of them here) where a non-compliant patient bitches and moans about the band not working. YOU have the responsibility to work with the band and if you don't understand that, maybe your surgeon and the entire team (all the people who assessed you for surgery eligibility) are to blame for not evaluating you properly or for neglecting to convey important information to you.

It really makes me sad when I read posts where people are failing and they blame everyone but themselves. For me, the surgeon put in my band and he fills me. He also gives me interesting information in my visits (like, "Yeah, you can eat 1200 calories of Twinkies and you'll lose the same amount of weight as if you ate 1200 calories of chicken breast and salad."), but I defer to the nutritionist for nutritional guidance. After all, that is HER expertise. You wouldn't ask a nutritionist to put a band in you, right? You go to the expert.

This post is not meant to slam any one person, but, shit, people...YOU HAVE TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF. After all, if you can't help yourself, how can anyone else help you?

You will get out of the band only as much as you are willing to put into it. Work with the band, people, not against it.

On a side note, it does seem that a lot of people have relatively little solid information about post-surgery care and that they might be being rushed through the pre-op process without the proper education. Then these same people seem to complain that they are not losing 100 pounds a week and they are confused about it. :(

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    • LeighaTR

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      · 0 replies
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      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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