Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Ugh! Difficult Roomate!



Recommended Posts

I'm considering moving out of my house. I currently own a house with my sister, but she's incredibly hard to live with, not because she has a difficult personality but because she's totally unmotivated. She's a workaholic with her business (she's a photographer), but does NOTHING to help at home. She's always just taking or editing photos. Our arrangement was for me to clean the inside of the house while she takes care of the outside. She does nothing outside. This weekend was the last straw for me. We had two Christmas parties at our house and both times she didn't help me get ready or clean up for them. Does this sound like the stupidest reason to move out? It's just so very difficult. I can't communicate with her. For her, asking for help is "bitching" at her. I've tried working out a plan with her; it never works. What would you do?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's a different story when you're dealing with family, over the typical college or young adult roommie. My guess she feels, that because you are sisters, you'll make up the slack. My suggestion is to clean up your things and let hers pile up. I do that with fiance' all of the time until he finally picks it up and starts keeping things clean because he's tired of dirty towels on the floor etc. If you keep "mommying her" then she's going to keep taking advantage of that, not intentionally--but it's natural instinct to take care of family and those you love. All else fails let her know you love her, but the living arrangement isn't working and she has 60 days to find a new place and buy out her ownership of the house. I for SURE couldn't live with either of my sisters (though they are my best friends), so I applaud you for trying. Good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Puddin...I know what you are dealing with. My sister and her family moved in with me after my ex left. It was the hardest year, 3 months, 2 days, 4 hours and 36 seconds of my life. lol...My sister is an obsessive-compulsive anal retentative neatfreak. I am not...I like to be comfortable in my surrondings. I moved out into my own apt with my daughter...we were both in heaven. Best decision I had ever made. It also saved my relationship with my sister. I would sit her down and have a heart to heart with her and if that doesn't result in any changes, then I would consider doing something else.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My sisters are my two best friends. That said, I would go insane living with either of them. My twin sister stays with us often because she lives 3 hours away, and I want to kill her by the end of every visit. I think I would look at getting your own place if you can afford it. Or at the very least, but a duplex so that you can each have your own side, lol. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×