Self Image Issues After Surgery

[unaguy05 5]

So I've lost over 100 pounds since my surgery in December of 2008 but how has my image of myself changed? As I've talked to my friends lately they have told me that I am more sensitive about my appearance and my body. I agree. Don't get me wrong I love the new person that I am but their is a flip side. Before my surgery I was over 300lbs. and, now that I look back on it, I was more comfortable with myself than I am today. I now weight 200 lbs. and I am constantly looking in the mirror and honestly disgusted with my body and more aware of it now. Before my surgery I had an idea of the body I would have and how I would look. Needless to say that is not the case and how I look currently is more realistic. Dealing with how I see myself is something only I can change but I wondering if anybody else has had this experience or something similar to this? If so I would love to hear from you.

[bambam31 168]

I think we all have things about our body we wish were different. Some things are within our power to change and others are not. I think a reasonable goal is to play the hand your dealt to its maximum and then realize what you've accomplished.

Good luck!

Brad

[BetsyB 9]

The "old you" was comfortable; it was what you knew. Change is difficult---even positive change.

People literally have to get comfortable in their new skin after shedding so much weight. And we are confronted with things that are very different---and maybe not quite what we anticipated.

But you'll get there--just like you get there after getting a haircut that is different than you imagined or ... any of a bazillion other things that require a getting-used-to-it period. It's a whole new reality for you--so it will take time.

[SoccerMomma73 1,867]

I never actually "saw" myself in a mirror before. If I did my hair or make-up, I looked only at what I was working on. I never looked at "me". Now I look at me and think WTF?!?!?! I'm learning to focus more on the positive but I do ALWAYS see the negative. But now, in addition to bat wings and a saggy belly I have boobs and a waist line. Bat wings and sag can be hid in clothes. Boobs and waist can be accentuated in clothes....it all works out.

Learn to love the new you. It will take time. But for every negative, find a positive and eventually, hopefully, you'll focus more of the positives. Good luck!

[CurvyCat 0]

Self-image is such a strange thing.

I get more self-conscious as I lose weight, and it's always been the case for me, every time I have lost it.

My husband doesn't get why I deflect any commentary on my weight loss, why I don't revel in the positive feedback.

I don't know exactly, but I am definitely more critical of my appearance the smaller I get.

The tummy bulges bother me more now because I can *almost* hide them, whereas before I just took them in stride because there was no disguising them.

I've gained and lost so many times, and it's always like this. The last time I did a little better, and hopefully this time I can get comfortable with myself in a smaller body for the long haul.

I've known a lot of women who've had bypass surgery and this outlook is less common than others, but definitely is not rare or unusual.

We've just got to work on getting comfortable in our new bodies, for the long haul.

[Karlzmom 1]

I can completely relate. Before, I accepted that it didn't really matter if I did my hair, fixed my makeup, dressed fashionably, etc. [or at least that's what I told myself] as I was still fat! I guess to avoid daily self loathing I got "comfortable" with the notion it was just me, and no fuss needed.

Now that I've taken the steps to become thinner and healthier the "fuss" seems warranted, and now I have the disappointment of seeing "flaws" or at least things that I wish we better....saggy skin, bulge here and there, ruddy complexion, etc.

Funny, I'm only just starting to see what others have been remarking on in terms of weight loss and I know its not realistic to think I'd go from blimp to supermodel, but it still would be nice to feel pulled together....

[Nean4488 1]

I can understand what your going threw. At over 300 pounds I didnt care what I looked like, what i wore. It didnt matter, now 50 pounds lighter Im stopping at every mirror, looking at how fat on am, how disgusting it is. Shaking my bat wings, how gross they are. I try on outfits over outfits to see which one makes me look the least fat. It is terrible and I feel like its only going to get worse. I hope we can find a way out of it!