Is this a joke? WTH is going on?!

[JustBreathe 0]

Hey all,

I was banded (realize band) on December 30th, 2009. At this point in my life, almost 5 months later, I am regretting my decision to ever have the surgery. I should have known when the doctor scheduled my surgery within a week of meeting me. One week. He shouldn't have even been able to get it done that quickly. But, alas, I was naive.

Anyway, I was ok after the surgery. HORRIBLE gas pain in my shoulders for about 2 months. I lost about 10-15 pounds in the first 2-3 weeks basically because I was on a liquid diet. I was slowly losing a pound or so a week. And then it just stopped. I have lost 20 pounds total, and that's it. I do not feel full. At all. I have told my doctor this and he calls it "head hunger," "eating around the band," etc, etc. He makes me feel like it is all my fault, that I am a failure and a bad patient, but I know in my heart I have done nothing wrong. I thought this surgery would help me feel full quicker, and it hasn't. I can eat exactly how much I was eating before the surgery, and if I don't, I don't feel full, and want to eat again in an hour. I absolutely hate my surgeon. He makes me feel like a liar. I get nauseated every now and then, and he won't give me anything for it. Instead told me it was my gallbladder and tried to convince me to let him take it out. No thanks. I just feel like crap. I thought the band was going to help me lose weight and it's not doing that. There is nothing that I can't eat. I can't eat and drink at the same time, or else the food comes back up, but besides that, everything else is the same. I am still hungry ALL THE TIME. I just don't get it. I have asked for xrays or tests, or SOMETHING, but my surgeon convinces me that it's ME, not the band. I am so depressed from all this, all I want to do is lie in bed and sleep all day. I don't know what to do. Someone please tell me what could be wrong with my band. Why am I not feeling full? Why can I eat bread and things like that that others cannot eat? Why do I not feel any different? I am at 7.5ccs and I think my band holds 9. Please help. :tongue2:

[123crod 170]

I have been banded for 10 months. I would suggest some counseling for emotional eating. I think you need to stop looking for the full feeling. In 10 months I have probably only felt full a couple of times and that is when I think I ate too much. Counseling is so great and everybody could use it.

The band does work faster for some than others. Maybe you are like me and a slow loser 65 lbs in 10 months. But slow is better than staying the same or gaining. I eat 3/4 cup of waterever I am eating and that is it full or not. Also make sure you are working out and drinking all your Water.

Since you already have the band look at what you can change to make it work with you. You can change Drs. anytime and work with someone else.

Also do you go to any support meetings? It makes all the difference to be around people going through what you are.

I am going to add one more thing. I went to seminar on a Saturday and had an appointment with Dr right after seminar. He looked at my records and asked when I wanted to have surgery and I asked for Monday. So I had my surgery 1½ days after meeting with Dr. so I would not judge the Dr on that.

Cheri

Edited May 24, 2010 by 123crod

[phowell 0]

I think a HUGE part about being banded is learning to deal with all the things that made you fat to begin with. Those don't go away. And you have to remember that the band is a tool not a miracle worker. You have to learn how to work with it. I was able to eat bread (and still can if I do it slowly) and I can eat and drink at the same time. You need to find a support group or possibly an info class that goes through all of those things. Before I was banded I had to take several classes on how to live with the band. It was a big help.

If you don't feel comfortable with your surgeon you need to find someone that can help. I would suggest looking around for someone that you think can help you more! Hope that helps a little...

[elcee 3,343]

I agree with 123crod. Stop looking for the full feeling. Full after being banded is different. What you should be aiming for is satisfied. Eat the recommended amounts, stop and see how long before you are PHYSICALLY hungry again.And yes this is far different from head hunger. Most of us eat for reasons other than hunger e.g Habit, boredom, because its there, because it looks good, because everyone else is eating it.

Counselling sounds like a good suggestion.

You also need to look at what you eat. Some foods will fill you up for a lot longer than others. Solid Protein is the best. Steak will fill you up for longer than mince ,mince will fill you better thah mashed potatoes etc.So if you are not making the right choices that could also be part of your problem.

Between meals you may get hungry but then you should have a drink. A full drink in a short period will help to fill you up - sipping over a long period of time won't.

Does your Dr allow Snacks? Mine allows a small planned healthy snack midmorning and mid afternoon if i need it.

Things like vegie Soup, yogurt, tinned tuna etc.

Hope some of these suggestions help.

[kimaly 57]

It can take awhile to get to your sweet spot. I don't think at 5mo. out you should be even considering removing your band. It's a tool and will not do the work for you, the learning process can be long and hard sometimes but if your willing to give it your all it will pay off. I agree you might need some counseling to figure out what got you where you are in the first place so you can deal with that and conquer it. Then your tool will make the losing process so much easier. Just stick with it and give it a fair shake. I also think your Doctor should have never have banded you a week after meeting you. He should have made sure you were mentally ready for such a Hugh lifestyle change. Have you considered getting a new Doctor? Are you going to any support groups? These are just some things you might want to think about. And with the band at 5mo. you should be anywhere between 20 and 40 lbs down, That's 1-2 lbs per week so your not as far off as you seem to think. And lying in bed won't help anything it could just be your problem, Get up and get moving even if it's just walking. You have to exercise and follow all the bandster rules if you want to succeed. That's the only way it will work. Just start out slow, anytime you feel like getting in the bed and pulling the covers over your head make yourself walk instead weather it be on a treadmill or outside or just back and fourth in the house what ever your comfortable with just get moving!!!!

Edited May 24, 2010 by kimaly

[New Joy 0]

I was banded the SAME DAY as you.

I am not at my sweet spot yet and I feel hungry quite a bit of the time.

I do not get the full feeling EVER....I have to weigh and measure my food or I will over eat.

I don't think I will ever feel full....but I look forward to the day that I don't feel hungry.

I have eaten around my band for several spurts. I find I have to exercise DAILY and document everything or I fall into old habits without even knowing.

The scale should not be the only measurement of success. I am a slow loser so i take measurements and photos every month. I also document the things I couldn't do before---- hiking, climb a set of stairs, swim, etc.

Make a list of all the non-scale victories you have reached in the last 5 months...you might realize it's not a failure afterall.

Good Luck!

[phowell 0]

Something else I wanted to say is that I got discouraged on here because everyone was losing so much faster than I was, but not everyone has the same body or the same weight loss. You really have to go at your own pace and make sure that you are doing what you need to do for yourself. I know that my work schedule hinders my weight loss, but I am still working at it. I have been banded for 2 years and am still not at my goal weight, but it is coming off slow and steady. I have had a few gains, but then I realize that the high fat/high calorie goes through WAY easier than the Protein I am supposed to eat!

[getnthere 0]

One of the surgons at the office I use also has been banded himself .He told us at a support group meeting that he would not do a fill on a patient when they came to him telling him they could eat any thing just like before. He said if they told him they were hungry between meals and even though they could eat alot more they were only eating the amount of food he had told them to he would give them a fill. He said it was how he knew they were ready and commited enough to get the fill. Maybe your Dr has some of the same thoughts.

[btrieger 21]

Everyone else is commenting on how your surgeon was right and I agree with them.

However, it sounds like he is also not giving you the attention that he should be. He should have you under a fluoroscope during fills to make sure everything is in place and working correctly. He also should have suggested counseling or a support group to you.

Scout around for a new surgeon. Don't necessarily switch but weigh your options.

[Futurerem 0]

I'm in total agreement with everyone else. Don't even think about giving up or getting the band out yet. I'm not even two months in, I have no restriction, I haven't had a fill, I can eat whatever I want. So I'm not saying I have some great experience to give you advice or anything. I'm just saying that you're young, you've got time to make this work, but you've got to make it work. You can't fail at something till you've finished trying it, and you're just getting started. So don't think about being a failure or your surgeon making you think you're a failure, just think about doing everything you can to make it work and hang in there.

[Cleo's Mom 257]

Hey all,

I was banded (realize band) on December 30th, 2009. At this point in my life, almost 5 months later, I am regretting my decision to ever have the surgery. I should have known when the doctor scheduled my surgery within a week of meeting me. One week. He shouldn't have even been able to get it done that quickly. But, alas, I was naive.

Anyway, I was ok after the surgery. HORRIBLE gas pain in my shoulders for about 2 months. I lost about 10-15 pounds in the first 2-3 weeks basically because I was on a liquid diet. I was slowly losing a pound or so a week. And then it just stopped. I have lost 20 pounds total, and that's it. I do not feel full. At all. I have told my doctor this and he calls it "head hunger," "eating around the band," etc, etc. He makes me feel like it is all my fault, that I am a failure and a bad patient, but I know in my heart I have done nothing wrong. I thought this surgery would help me feel full quicker, and it hasn't. I can eat exactly how much I was eating before the surgery, and if I don't, I don't feel full, and want to eat again in an hour. I absolutely hate my surgeon. He makes me feel like a liar. I get nauseated every now and then, and he won't give me anything for it. Instead told me it was my gallbladder and tried to convince me to let him take it out. No thanks. I just feel like crap. I thought the band was going to help me lose weight and it's not doing that. There is nothing that I can't eat. I can't eat and drink at the same time, or else the food comes back up, but besides that, everything else is the same. I am still hungry ALL THE TIME. I just don't get it. I have asked for xrays or tests, or SOMETHING, but my surgeon convinces me that it's ME, not the band. I am so depressed from all this, all I want to do is lie in bed and sleep all day. I don't know what to do. Someone please tell me what could be wrong with my band. Why am I not feeling full? Why can I eat bread and things like that that others cannot eat? Why do I not feel any different? I am at 7.5ccs and I think my band holds 9. Please help. :cursing:

Aside from your feelings about the band, the fact that your doctor did your surgery within a week of seeing you is troubling. Unless you had all the pre-operative tests by then, which are imperative. Obese people can have many conditions which need to be evaluated or treated prior to surgery including diabetes, high blood pressure and sleep apnea. Additionally you should have met with a nutritionist to discuss the expectations and eating after the band. It doesn't appear from your post that any of this happened.

While I do recognize that head hunger exists, I believe too many doctors use that term as a "blame the victim" excuse. If you are hungry after getting 7.5ml in a 9ml then a competent surgeon would recognize that you have not reached your sweet spot. And he would work with you to help you achieve it.

I am so tired of hearing "the band is only a tool" because if this tool isn't doing it's job, then it's not your fault. It is your doctor's job to get this tool to work and your job to eat healthy and exercise and chew and not drink with your meals. The band is sold as a tool that should make you feel satisfied with less (but healthy) food and keep you feeling satisfied for a certain length of time. If you are doing your part and this isn't happening, it is NOT your fault. If your surgeon is making you feel guilty and blaming you, then I would seriously search for a new, and more competent doctor.

Yours does not seem to grasp the follow up care that is needed. That is a very common problem I see - the surgeons can do the mechanics of the surgery but are horrible at follow up because they frankly don't understand the band and have unrealistic expectations and then blame the patient. I think many see the patients success as their own, but the patient's failures as the fault of the patient.

Please look for another surgeon. You do not want to have every appt. be a confrontation with you feeling guilty. That is not good post-op care and unfair to you.

Good luck.

[Momto3redheads 18]

Hang in there - I have a friend who went through a similar situation....her doc made her feel like a complete loser of a patient. I don't think that this is their job, they are to educate and assist us in our journey...not beat us down.

I had surgery in March last yr - and I wasn't at my sweet spot until June/July that year....it was a long hard road until then, of feeling hungry and thinking that maybe something was wrong with me and the band wasn't going to work, etc....but once you get your sweet spot, you will be fine. Just hang in there! (and you might look for a new doc...*I* would if it were me!)

[MizPeppy 3]

I totally understand. I do. I am with you 100%. I never felt the effects of the band. For two years and many fills and unfills, I lost the battle. I went on WW at the first of the year and lost 28 lbs. I then got gastroenteritis and couldn't throw up and screwed up something. A month later I am still nauseous and on Monday will get the band out. I am thinking of doing the sleeve, because as of today I've lost 38 lbs and don't want to gain them back. I have no Fluid in the band now, but as soon and the pain and nausea are gone, I'm afraid I will eat. I still don't trust myself.

I am reading food, Women, and God. which doesn't have anything to do with God really, (I'm a Buddhist) and it has been so helpful for the emotional stuff. We are fat for a reason and until that reason is taken care of it will be a battle. Good luck to you. My advice is to diet like its not there. You are worth it. Beth

[L12 13]

I had almost no restriction until six months after surgery; at that point I had only lost about 20 lbs. It took six months and seven fills to get to restriction and be less hungry. If I had given up at five months I wouldn't be more than 100 lbs down now and under my goal.

[JoiaRox 430]

Four words: GET A NEW DOCTOR.