Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Recommended Posts

I'm just wondering why people make the comment that "you're losing too much weight." Are they just used to seeing us as very large, and now that we are becoming smaller, we look thinner than we actually are??? I am right around 180 pounds and in 12s and 14s. I know that I've never appeared to weigh as much as I do, but jeez, I'm still around 40 pounds over weight (although I feel just fine and I'm very happy with myself). People are just shocked when I say I want to lose another 20 pounds and be a size 10.

Thought about this???

Crystal

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well if you think about it, it is quite rare for people to lose a lot of weight in the first place, so people are just not used to it. Let me guess, it was a person who is also heavy or at least overweight? Some overweight people, try to convince themselves, and some quite successfully, that being overweight is attractive. Also a lot of people just don't feel comfortable with change. You likely have changed quite a bit. I have had this comment made about me along with, "well I don't know where 20 more lbs are going to come from". "Now honey don't lose too much" "Wow how much more are you planning to lose?" You will like hear all of them before you are finished!!! It isn't your problem, clearly they are the ones struggling.. Hang in there!! Isn't it great? Hugs!!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

And sometimes people are just more comfortable with THEIR compartmentize thoughts of you. I find myself guilty of that with thoughts of myself. An example is my sister treated me to some clothing. I started this journey in Dec 09 wearing a tight 30/32 from the Avenue. I've lost over 50lbs but was hard me to pick up a smaller size than 28 therefore I picked up the size 26 even though I told myself to buy the size that I just fit into. Needless to say I put those 26 on today and they were loose.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

People can tell me that all they want! lol Seriously, I would simply tell them that my doctor has given me a goal for a normal BMI, and I will continue to work toward that goal.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's just like portion disortion with food. People are just not used to seeing the smaller sizes. I had a portion of chilli and a woman at work freaked and said, "is that all you're eating???" She had Soup. I should have said, mine is alot healthier and has ALOT more Protein but, all I said was, "yes and I have some veggies too".

Maybe that's why obesity rates are on the rise, because so few know what a normal portion looks like anymore or, what a "normal" weight looks like either.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The same happen to me all the time.i started out at 324lbs,lost 118lbs.i weight 206lbs. people always telling me don,t lose anymore weight.i am trying to get to onderland.i don,t know what it is i guest people are use to seeing us at a certain weight.why is it their concern about weight.did you see dr.phil show about the fat debate.people have so much to say. different views on obesity.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I get it all the time as well, I love the one "you are going to blow away" okay really??? I plan on losing 27 more pounds to be in the normal range for my height and it is the top of the range. I think people are just shocked that you are able to lose a lot of weight and seeing you smaller amazes them. But I have done this myself, I have had rail thin girls tell me they want to lose 10lbs and i am like from where so I too am quilty.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

First of all, Congrats on your weight loss!!! Secondly, I just watched my father and my aunt lose about 80 pounds a piece after surgery. I almost thought the same thing (they might be losing too much.) But, then I realized that it was because I had never seen them thin and they do not look like the same people I know at all! Imagine watching a good friend slowly, but surely change the look of their face. I don't know about you, but my face has always carried an awful lot of weight. I believe if you do not look like the same person, you may look unhealthy to them. They're so used to seeing a whole other you!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have really enjoyed reading everyones take on this. I think Laurie is totally right but I also think everyone here is also right. Our perceptions are relative to what we know, so when things or people change, we have to change too. That is the whole problem. Today, I had a person I consider a friend, (who is round but not huge) say to me, "Gee Donna, don't lose too much more Okay?" I smoothed it over by telling her I was jealous of her because she has her credit cards paid off. She smiled and we were fine. At least I hope we were fine. She may have to go her seperate way, but she wont be the first.... Hugs to all......

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I look forward to folks saying that to me. I'll just laugh quietly to myself and keep on going. :smile2:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×