OH Juli

Eddie I was born in Cincinnati and moved to Columbus 20 years ago. Columbus is the a pretty queer town. I love it there. Now, while driving to Michigan this past Novemeber I hit a deer in Lima. What a mess! The deer didn't look so good either. It wasn't my typical route and I'll never drive it again! And just an aside for the other LDR's out there I'm with my honey again this weekend. We're both typing away madly at a coffee shop near her home. :target: or should I say :girl_hug: I"m so nasty! FYI, if your man and you want cheap flights back home skybus.com has some great flights from Jacksonville/St Augustine to Columbus.

Hi gay people. Nothing to report, just checking in! xo J

Denise- You crack me up! I'm going to go in search of somthing out of my regular, sounds like Yoga won't be it! What are you going to do with your summer months?

Recovery from lapbanding hurt more. Really, I think it was the difference between having your internal organs moved and having stuff on the outside moved. I do have sensation in my nipples, which there was a 10% chance of losing that! But the sides of breasts near my underarms are numb. I know other people who will don't want reconstructive surgery. As for the pannis, the hanging belly, when ever I get rashy there I call my doctor to have it in my medical history, so removal can be medically indicated. I'm going to have to pay for everything else I'm sure.

Linda, I'm a mom and when my kid gets up with me I can't stand it. I need my sanity time, which is really only 20 minutes but it makes such a difference! Sue, Sorry to hear you're in pain with your torn muscle. You'll start losing quickly when you get healed. Don't even begin to think you're going to stop at 35-40 pounds! About breast reductions. I got one 5 years ago, when I dropped 90#. I was a 40H and 40I. A little lopsided! Before I had lost the weight I was wearing J cups. Yes, they were custom bras that cost $65 each! The surgeon took me down to a full C. With gaining back lots of the weight my cup is a D...I'll have a revision when I get the weight off. I'll also have a belly-ectomy!! But my point is....GET PLASTIC SURGERY IF YOU WANT IT! It's the best thing you can do for yourself, once you are healthy.

Yea YOU! Sounds like you are doing better with this! Can I suggest one more thing in regard to the hotel. You can ask your sister what her budget is for a hotel, and offer to find one close that fits! That way you are "helping" her, but you can also KNOW FOR SURE that there is a hotel booked. You can even call the day before to make sure everything is still good at the hotel then call your sister to assure her.... And don't think a gulity thought about not spending every free moment with them. It's your time, your life and you don't need to give it away to anyone. xo

Lucy My GF and I were talking about vacationing in Miami next year. Would you be a good person to tell two 40ish year old lesbians where they might want to go and what to do? Your big day will be here very soon and you'll be on the otherside of bandland with the rest of us! Juli

LLSibley I like how you think! Good morning all!

Carlene- Outinamerica asks your gender and your sexual orientation. So you could easily enter female and straight. It doesn't only have man seeking man or woman seeking woman. And how it's listed when you go to seek is by your gender and your sexual orientation. There are males, females, male to female trans and female to male trans as far as gender goes. There are straight, lesbian, bi, gay and curious as far as sexual orientation goes. So me, back when I was on the market I skipped all the males, all the bis all the curious, all the trans and looked at the girls who dig girls. You could go there and hunt for the straight men. I doubt you'd find them, but catagorically there is room for them. And the idea of reverse descrimination, which I think you are talking about, just doesn't hold Water. Because though minorities can be anti-majority, they don't hold the sway or the power that the majority have. They can scream and kick and say you can't come to our party but until they get to critical mass there's not much they can do. It's like an ant kicking the toe of a human. The ant can be angry, mean and indignant, but the human has size and power on their side and can easily squash the ant. Being part of the majority, for me it's being white, it's hard to step aside and allow for other expressions without thinking something is being taken from me. (I'm so not used to having things taken from me!) I've been places where whites have been excluded and at first it felt uncomfortable, but when I got the "aha" moment, I realized other people deserve to be free of a place where the majority is looking in. Juli

Well I typically eat about 1400 calories a day, which is more than a lot more than other people eat who have good restriction. I haven't had a fill yet because I'm losing at a good rate. But if you want to see how I eat specifically here's my fitday journal. FitDay.com - Diet and Fitness journal for juligirl01 Today was a bad day...I had some pizza! Which isn't normal, but it happens. Really, I just don't eat many simple carbs so I've got to eat something. Fruits and veggies which I do eat regularly don't keep me full like Protein so I try to get some nearly every time I eat.

Sunta- You rock! Thanks for being eloquent when I was so angry I couldn't type. Juli

Sunny and Chim, When we get two more people to volunteer we'll get started. Please email me at juligirl01@sbcglobal.net so I can get your email addresses. I'll play team leader! I do it all the time. I can assure you we'll get this organized and planned smoothly if we all contribute a bit of time. You two other, up until now, nameless volunteers email as well! Thanks, Juli

Another cause of hair loss a few months out from sugery is a reaction from the anastesia (I know I slaughtered the spelling do forgive me, I've not installed the spell check application). Its delayed because it affects the folicle at the root and it takes a a bit of time for it to grow out to the scalp and fall out. But it does grow back! Or so that the word on the street.

You know sleepyjean, for me it goes back to people are different and not one way is better than the other. We each have are reasons for everything. I'm an over share-er. But I respect a person's right to keep things to herself. Differences are just that. A different way to be...

A cruise would be fun, but so out of the range of price many people could pay. It would take more planning too, no? But ULTIMATELY I think that's a great idea...maybe if there becomes an annual LBT gathering... Anyway, all yous guys who say they are willing to help, we need to make this happen... Who wants to play the role of team leader? I will, but if someone else wants the position they need NOT arm wrestle me for it. I'll be a good support person too! Come on, let's get beyond the talking stage and move to planning!

Eddie Thanks for the pics! Nice to put a face with your fabulous posts! Mind over matter until you get that fill! How is your weight loss going? J

You know talking about the easy way out... <O:p I was talking with my therapist who I still see about once a month for checking in.... <O:p I've been known to say that I got a band around my brain when I got a band around my stomach because how I think about food has totally changed. She said there could be a debate if the change in me is physiological, behavioral or cognitive. I said I do believe it's a combination of all three. Certainly there's the band on the stomach, physically I'm just not as hungry or I get full faster. There's my new way of eating. I don't eat a bunch of shit anymore. It's counter productive. I ABSOLUTELY have reframed how I think about my weight, success and food. <O:p So sure it's easy to jump through insurance hoops, have someone poke around in your brain, dig up old behaviors and their causes, relearn how to eat, move your body increasingly more and defend the decision to want to change. <O:p</O:pI dare someone to tell me I took the easy way out. Okay, I double dog dare them. :heh:<O:p

Got it. True legal doesn't equal right. However, gay doesn't equal pink hair. And truly demanding a grocery store to sell lumber is daft and goes against their business model and they needn't comply. But gay is a status that has been (in some circles) defined as protected because it is not a choice. It's how we are born. I expect in my lifetime to see it added as protected by an admendment to the Bill of Rights. What's cool is that we can debate that and vote our opinions. GO USA! Talking about flight attendants weight...a company is allowed to establish a code of behavior or expectations that when a person signs on they are explained and accepted. Weight is something that can affect performance. Ask the military or firefighters. Age is another touchy area. Think about female newscasters who are let go because they don't look youthful enough. ok. done.

I have to say, I'm with: get the hell out of my way or join the party. I work where there are no secrets. I told a handful of people before the surgery. I shouldn't have surprised but I was when people I rarely speak to came to me when I returned. All offered me support or encouragement. A maintenance man for example shared with me that his cousin has had the same surgery with a, "way to go". Now a step even further in the, "you want to talk about my WLS" direction, I've been known to say to people who've asked, "how's the weight loss going?" "You tell me. Can't you see a difference?!" I'll even pose if in the mood. You do get what you give in every respect. Juli

To answer that specifically: Fundamentally we are a republic that is held together though codified laws. Those laws are base on the Constitution and the Bill of Rights. Those are amazing documents. Our economy is capitalist, where the market drives who buys what. However there are laws that address fundamentally unethical practices from monopolies and to harmful production. Human rights are to be taken into account and not put aside simply because there is no profit in them. Human rights are addressed in the constitution. Your thinking, about your money in OUR economy is that you should be allowed to do anything to make a buck because of your risk. What you need to factor into business risks are the laws of the country where you do business. US law says you can't discriminate. You can't. You can't mislabel food. You can't employ children for a dollar a day. Laws change as people get more Enlightened. It's a matter of who pushes first and then who pushes back. And our fantastic government, with the 3 elected branches, helps those who are pushing figure out how things should be. So by all means in our free market invest. But keep it legal.

My close friend who is very over weight and I talked this through many times before and during surgery. She's way into fat acceptance and I'm way into going to the gym to lose the fat. It's a tightrope walk at times. But I try to stick to the belief there are many ways to be, and not one is better than the other. She tries to keep it there too. We however, don't go to restaurants together anymore and keep mostly on the phone because she's not going to go for a bike ride with me either. Now my partner has been AMAZING! She's the best cheerleader I've got. She celebrates every pound I lose and always has positive things to say. She too is getting more fit along side me, though she only had 15 pounds to lose... god love her.

My average Protein is about 120 grams a day. I know it's a bit high, but that's were it typically sits. I'd rather have too much and keep my hair than not get enough. 100 grams daily is what my nutritionist has told me to go for.

You're not a bitch. I agree with all the statements above...one more option is you can offer to go and visit her on your next vacation from work if they have to cancel plans due to the friend's home falling through and the her inability to get a hotel. There is no reason in the world your sister and her children should even have to see the inside of your apartment. Good Lucky, I know it's hard sometimes to deal with conflict...but it's something we all have to do at times.

So are we talking about waiting until next June or doing something this winter? I say Vegas in late January or February. Juli

Just an aside, Gadgetlady- under your name it says "looking forward to life" I can appreciate that. Life is/will be different when the weight is lost, but it makes me think you are not living in the moment and enjoying life today. That's rather sad.