Hollie519

if 30 pounds overwhelms you, set a smaller goal for shorter periods of time. Break your 6 months up and divide your weight. Set your goal a little lower and when you break through it and than some, you'll feel great.

Maybe this comparing myself thing comes from my mother who used to blab my problems to EVERYONE while they all pretended their lives were perfect. She has always asked me why i can't be more like Tenille (her friend from high school's daughter). I have no idea why I can't freaking be her. i'm not her. I am way better than her. I have always known that but I was over weight. My mom has obviously damaged my mind. i mean it could be a bad thing or a good thing. I strive to be the best at everything because of her. You know what, I love this site. I just had another realization. My mom has always wanted me to be someone else, so when i see other people with any kind of talent that i don't have, I am jealous. WOW! what a sad thing. i wish i could just love myself and love being me but its like a mind game. it never ends. Can't wait to start counseling. September 3rd i go to a screening to start counseling. Until than, you guys are my mentors. oh and i know my problem isn't with the lady, its with myself. i feel bad now for even being that way.

I have noticed that certain things that pertain to weight loss are upsetting me more than they should. For instance, people who think this surgery is like the bypass. You can't sit on your ass and lose weight. God did not intend for it to happen that way. ok perfect story: I was at the gym, on the eliptical machine, and another lady got on to the one next to me. She seemed about 30 and in great physical shape. When she started to move, she was acting like she was taking a strole in the park. I watched to see if she'd ever speed up and she never did! Oh my gosh, i was like can you move please. i didn't really say that but it was super discouraging to have this lady next to me acting like this was a freakin joke. I mean i have no clue why i act this way. I mean earning your own is a big thing in my life. My parent's are very wealthy but you can bet i don't see a dime of it. i have to work for everything i have. My father was the same way. His wealth comes because he busts his ass everyday. Maybe I just need to keep telling myself that good things happen to good people and karma is a bitch. I just would hate for someone to think that i ate candy bars and got thin like you can with the bypass. I want people to see the sweat and tears and the time a effort i put into my body. Sometimes I guess I just feel discreditted for the work i put in. I just wish it didn't bother me so much!

smoking weed doesn't make you hungry period. For any people. It makes you have cravings like being on your period. I have learned to control that. Just like all drugs, you only eat if you think about eating. I knew i couldn't or i wouldn't get the surgery. And the neutral stomach works both ways. If i ate until my pants were about to burst and got high, i wouldn't feel full anymore.

Bottom line! It works if you work it, it sucks if you don't. If you are not ready to try to lose weight, than don't even have the surgery. No offense but it sounds like you need to get off the pity pot. Stop feeling so bad for yourself. There are people who have it way worse than you. Be grateful for what you have and start telling yourself, this isn't that bad. THERE IS NOT MAGIC TO SNAP YOUR FINGERS AND THE WEIGHT COMES OFF. IF YOU DON'T WORK HARD, YOU WON'T SEE RESULTS. ISN'T THAT HOW EVERYTHING IN THE WHOLE WORLD IS? Mind over matter. Good luck

I count calories. The more I work out, the more calories I'm allowed. the less I work out, the less amount of calories I allow myself. But trust me, I am not starving.

My boyfriend and I are doing a lot better. I am a frequent pot smoker. i do not tell people this because I feel they judge me. I don't know how any of you got through liquid diet without it. I mean getting high helps my stomach feel neutral when i'm starving. We made a resolution to quit smoking. We're moving to a different/ CLEANER place in 2 weeks. We also decided that he would take on more of the stress of bills being paid. I mean we share our money but I was making sure things were being done. I can't have that responsibility. I am not someone's mom. I'm 18 years old. i mean we have enough money to support our habbit and pay our bills. I just have really bad money anxiety. i have a big fear of not making it. But I told him, if i don't feel any different by the time we are living in our new place, than when we move, i'll move back to my parents. I feel really good about it. i feel like because his smoking has gotten so heavy recently, we kind of just sit there and don't even talk anymore. So I believe quitting is the answer. Sorry I didn't share about that before. Like I said, people judge.

Well ladies, here I am different. I was never told to stop taking birth control even before surgery. they new i was on it and i have had no complications because of it. i wouldn't say just start taking it again but let your doctor know whats up.

I hear you Leslie! I am the exact same way. I recall being about 9 or 10 and I was eating an ice cream and some old lady said oh you are just a regular old butterball aren't you. I have never ever told anyone that to this day. When i went home, I stuffed my face beacause she said that to me. i was like I'll show her. But, i think i kind of have a way with words when it comes with talking to people about sensitive subjects. I wasn't trying to tell the girl she was fat. i was trying to tell her, look I found a way to be happy and i'm like you. I know people are sensitive about their weight but if you are fat, you are fat. No reason to deny it. i have a cousin thats like that. Dresses like a skinny girl and its horrifying to look at. You'd think with all the mean people in the world, these people would know they were different. i've known I was fat since i was 6 years old. i used to pray to god every night to help me not each junk food and to work out. So, I know what fat feels like. But thats just me

You know, I have no clue what size my band is. I belive it is filled 4.0 to 4.5 i think a little less than 4.5. All I know is my hole is a little bit smaller than the size of a quarter. During my last fill, I had to have x-rays and I saw the liquid go down. pretty cool. I do have a childlike curiosity, because I am a child. haha I just turned 18 in May. My study is a 5 year long study. i went through extensive screaning and have been to my doctors office more times than I even went to school. I went for check ups every 2 months and can go in for a fill anytime i need one. I have 1 appoinment left for my year check up and than I believe I have to go every six months after that. When i started my liquid diet pre-op, I left school and started an at home program. i was still able to go to prom and walk with my graduating class. I have to say people were SHOCKED! I mean and i was seeing them between 30-60 pounds lost. so throughout that time period. I have had nothing but positive feedback. Honestly, I thought people would make up rumors about me because i was pretty popular for a fat person (and that does matter in high school!). i did have one girl say, why is she even having the surgery? She's just going to sit on the couch and eat cupcakes all day anyway. But I'm sure you can imagine that bitches face when she saw me. :] I make an effort to go see the people who were mean to me. The satisfaction of looking better than them now is FANTASTIC because not only do i know i look better, i know I am a better person too. If you have anymore questions let me know. I hope I covered it all. :] thanks for the compliments :]

I love that quote! And I know I also had a hard time when i was on other diets going back and saying I had gained. But be easy on yourself. If you are an emotional eater, than you are probably doing your body more harm right now. Just try to focus more on happy thoughts. Half full not half empty. Happy thought= good eating= feeling good about yourself= happy thought and repeat :]

Look you are half way there! They say that heavy people stay heavy because they are comfortable being that way. Don't be afraid to venture from your comfort zone. Just stay strong and take it one day at a time. Some people can also get overwhelmed when thinking about a large goal. Divide it in sections. Thats what i did and it has helped a lot. Remember, pace yourself. The slower you lose the weight, the longer it stays off. And working out doesn't have to be something thats a grueling process. Start at a walk and set your goal to eventually be up to a run. i can't tell you how great it feels to be able to run. It took me 8 months to be able to run a straight mile. All I did was start from a walk. If I can do it, you can do it. Keep your chin up. There are people here for you.

See the thing is, I wasn't like not friends with the girl. I mean we were softball buddies for a couple years but i don't hang out with her now. I really thought it was fate that brought us to the store together because i had been thinking about her a lot. I just wish some people could be saved from all the bull shit i had to go through. I know its like quiting drugs. you have to do it for you. I guess i just care way too much for other people. Thanks for the advice.

The way I was introduced to lap band, was through my grandma. I was hesitant at first but after meeting the surgeon and sitting in the seminar, I was sold. Now my problem is, not only was i sold, I applied for the damn job and i got it. I feel like a sales person. I love the lap band so much and am so pleased with the results, I think I might be preaching! Yesterday, I talked with 3 different woman about having them having the surgery and my experience. My surgery was done through a teen study. I knew they had spots left and knew a girl who'd be perfect for it. We used to play softball together and this girl is amazing. So, I knew she had the effort to put forward. I wasn't personal enough with her to have her phone number. By fate, I ran into her at the grocery store. I was so excited. I didn't want to bombard her with it, so I let her talk first. The surgery came up because she noticed a difference in me. Than i said, "I had it through a study and they have spots left if you are interested. It's free." She was horrified. I mean I can't even describe the look on her face. And i knew right than, it was the same experience i had had when my mom told me I wasn't the kind of girl guys look at. i know she didn't mean it that way but I was devistated. I could only imagine how this girl felt having someone who wasn't even her friend, tell her that she was overweight. I have now backed down and do not bring my surgery up first. Am I wrong for trying to spread the love? I mean, I wouldn't have had this surgery had no one told me. Help! I want to help but don't know how without being offensive. Girls my age react way different than woman over 25 when the topic is brought up. Tips please!

Oh all you girls are so cute! How do you think I feel, I'm from San Diego, the home of the pretty peolpe! Skinny girls at the beach all day long with their baby gap clothes. haha now i am one of them :] Congrats to you 3 for working your butt's off; Literally Don't give yourself another problem by getting yourself in debt. Thats worse.

Doctors are just a little bit smarter than us :] Try to not be so stressed. It can prevent weight loss. You should be fine. Good luck!

I haven't had a shopping addiction but i do have a little sister who is about the same size now. Like 15 more pounds and i'll fit into her pants :] I raid her closet on the daily and she just got a bunch of school clothes. HAHAHA! yea I love it!

I did not leave the country, but my band became swollen shut from being too tight. I was completely deflated and had to start from square one. I gained about 10 pounds. I think 5 of the pounds were the same as your 5 pounds. I wasn't happy to gain it, but knew my body needed nutirents after being deprived of even Water for 36 hours. I became depressed and stayed in a slump of losing and gaining the same 5 pounds. I just had to stop one day and say, "ok, cut the shit!" you have to just take your mind out of that state. I mean you obviously had the surgery for a reason right. I turned 18 during this time and being able to buy my own groceries helped. My mom would buy junk for my sister and my dad, but if i knew it was there, i thought about it all day. Even if you have children or a spouse who likes a certain kind of junk food, you still shouldn't buy them if you are tempted. From the look of America, whoever eats the food you buy, should be eating healthy as well. I also found that taping a picture that I think shows my heaviest point in my kitchen helped me stop snacking. I frequently go through my old pictures to give my self a pat on the back for coming so far and the motivation to keep going. Good luck and just keep your chin up. Everyday that you make excuses to not eat like you should or not work out, is a day that you could have been going in the right direction. One day at a time. If you feel you are eating well, step up your work out. Just experiment with changing what you are eating and working out and you should see results.

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i have had the lap band for almost 11 months and have had the same trouble sleeping as I used to have before. I have actually noticed it is worse than it used to be, but i do not believe its because of the lap band. And more sleep is better because you burn more calories while you are sleeping than you do just sitting down. Good luck! If you have any sleeping tips, I'd love to hear them.

i went home a half hour after surgery. I was getting pissed off just sitting there. The nurses said, pee in the cup and your mom can take you home. This surgery is meant to be minor

Be careful how much you are spitting everything back up. I had a time where my band became completely swollen shut because of it. I didn't have anything to eat or drink for 36 hours. By the time my mom got me to the doctor, I was so out of it. The uncomfortable feeling when the food is pushing through the band is normal. Your body is supposed to get used to it. If it bothers you that much, just be more convince to how much you are chewing your food. <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>

Lame! I wish there were more people here. I mean I had surgery with another girl but you can tell she has hostile feelings toward me. Lets just say, she hasn't seen very good results. I believe there are 12 other young people in my study, but they aren't allowed to give out their info. So unless I happen to bump into one of them, than I'm SOL. You meant class by myself cause under age people don't have lap band yet?

I would actually like to meet and discuss with some people how they feel after having the lap band. I know a few people from San Diego who have it but are older women. I wish there were more people around my age. I just want to make a real life lap band buddy.