Nanook

There were five kids in my family and my mother died of cancer when I was 14, 2nd from the bottom of the line but eldest girl so I suppose I took on the nurturing role in the family. I was also the "good girl" out of the two girls, lol. Possibly being raised a Catholic it added to my guilt when it came to dealing with my father and still trying to be the good girl. Others in my family could give up on him but I just wasn't capable. He had some form of psychological disorder also compounded and medicated with alcohol. Of course I over compensated with my own kids never to be like him and make them feel the way I did growing up. For me I used his alcoholism as an excuse as to why he treated people as he did especially his own family. It's hard to take back the years where you let a sick parent rule your life. I probably didn't get the help from therapy I needed to deal with it but still recommend it if possible. Maybe it will help with the strength factor I never had. Good luck, Nancy.

I just had surgery on the 11th and am not a fan of public bathrooms and the extra pressure to produce. I found that I let gravity help. If I wasn't able to urinate after trying for a bit I stood up and sat down again. I don't know why that worked for me but it did. I think I came upon it by accident because I would get up out of frustration to leave but felt the urge and kept trying. Of course this was while attached to my pain pump! Anyway I'm sure it's pretty common and being in a more relaxed situation (home) I'm sure it would get better unless of course there was some problem. Good luck, Nancy.

Good luck Glou..., I wasn't strong enough to break up with my alcoholic toxic father until he died and now there is peace! Take care Nancy.

JaffaSteve, Good article I've read plenty of those and more in my Fat Acceptance groups. There is a ton of that kind of literature out there. Why would I go through one wls, which failed to go through a more extreem one if I didn't feel the affects of that kind of discrimination! Nanette, the artist formally known as Nanook:thumbup:

Thanks BJean, I like Nanette, a little more flattering than Nanook! I don't know, my daughter thinks sex is noticed first but I don't know if it's under our control and we're just wired a certain way. As humans I'd think we'd be programed to seek out sex before race or size. I'm sure there are people who know more about it than I do. Also I am very nearsighted so I suppose it depends on how far away they were from me.

BJean, I remember that Oprah show about eye color but I also seem to remember some athropologist who was an expert on racism on her show once and she asked a question when you see a person walking down the street what's the first thing you notice about them. It was either color first or sex first. Now I can't remember as I'm oldddddddd. I wonder where size plays a part, meaning weight/height.

Debbie, I'm just glad I'm not still working in the city and riding the metro buses and the subway anymore, good luck to you, Nancy.:blushing:

Good luck all you peeps going for RNY. I had mine on Thursday and it was a killer but is getting better every day. Unlike my daugher I'm able to get all my meds in and my supplements but I'm still on liquids and have no appetite. In fact food kind of turns me off! That was an issue for me with the lap band and thank God this seems to be working:thumbup:. Anyway let us know how things progress, Nancy.

Serenity, Throwing the whole Russian thing into the mix threw a whole other cup of flour in the batter! So who knows what the problem was. Are any of us strong enought to ask? I'm not. I just brought up the weight issue as I was very involved with fat acceptance groups for a while and still feel strongly about them but just couldn't be strong enough to be that accepting of myself as a fat person. But I belive in fighting for the rights of fat people. In those FA groups you have people of all sexes, races, religions and sexual preference. Also in fat acceptance you don't have to be fat some people just find it something they feel strongly about and there are others that have a variety of eating disorders whether fat or thin or whatever. I just hope I didn't make you feel that I was ignoring your feelings about it being a race issue as I know no matter where we live race discrimination is still a real issue. Take care, Nancy.

Thanks Susan, I appreciate and hope things continue to be successful for you also with your sleeve! Take care Nancy.

Thanks Headhunter, Today I know what it's like to be kicked to death in the ribs by feral donkeys! My group has a combined vits/sups etc... where you only take four chewables a day which is much different than the huge amount my daughter took and could never get down! But I have to take the protein everyday which is no big deal, well now it is of course but in the future shouldn't be. Anyway if these damn headaches would go away life would be much better. Thanks for your support, Nancy.

Seren... I haven't read all the responses but have been involved with fat acceptance groups and most of them feel the same way. What can I say but weight seems to be the only acceptable form of prejudice today, I'm sure people will argue that. So it may not be that you are black or blind. There are some stupid people out there who act like this. It could be she had a germ phobia but most fat people have felt this from time to time, like we're sucking up everyones oxygen and smell. Actually I believe some people feel they will "catch" obesity! Sorry if you're having issues, no one deserves to be treated like that. Take care Nancy.

Well I'm back from my RNY that I had on Thursday and feel a lot better now that I'm home. Was released at 9:30 AM Saturday but as most of us know it takes a while and left at 1:00PM. At first the pain was so great along with headaches that I was experiencing a bit of self doubt about this surgery. I had some scar tissue from the removal of the lap band last October so I suppose it took a little longer. That incision for the big stapler is pretty sore. And I don't remember if this happened with the lap band but after this surgery I physically appear larger but refuse to get on the scale:ohmy: I won't discusss the hospital or the staff because even though there were a few bad experiences there were more positive, can't be perfect but did have a male nurse from Hell who probably needed the vacation he took to Italy today:cursing: OK I lied I did discuss but I'll try not to from now on! Anyway I had a bit of a scare as my bp was way up the day I dealt with, I'll call him "Biff" (male nurse from Hell) and it just increased during the day and got worse and my headaches got worse and body temp rose. So they called in an on-call surgeon and she waited until things got better as she didn't want to have to go in there that night due to some infection. Trust me I'd pull the cord before I'd let them do that again!! So I'm on liquids, clear for a couple days and my meds are going down and the headaches are starting to subside. Maybe because I'm back on my antidepressants. Plus I can sleep as that was nearly impossible except during the surgery! But I just thought since I could sit up a bit I'd share while it's still fresh in my mind, my short term memory is not too good, not due to the surgery:blushing:. I thought for those of you it would benefit, as I'm certainly not a procedure pusher that I would share in case it helps someone. Take care, Nancy.:tongue_smilie:

Sistasassy, Your dog is really cute what kind is it? Nancy.

Can you call your primary, if you're worried about your heart they may send you in. I had chest pains when I had the band and my primary sent me to the ER to rule out my heart which it wasn't and it ended up being acid reflux and a hiatal hernia. If you're worried and you surgeon is that non-responsive about your health you should call your primary. We have to be our own health advocates. Good luck, Nancy. PS mine would last seconds but come back that often too like a spasm.

I haven't been here as long as Green had and a lot of you but could tell by her posts that she was a good person and uplifting considering what she was going through, she will be missed, Nancy.

If you need CPAP equipment you can go online and order it from www.directhomemedical.com . I'm sure there are plenty of other companies to order from and you could probably overnight them. That's how I get replacement parts now. wwwcpaptalk.com is a forum you can join if you have questions about your machine. They're good at giving advice on where to get the cheapest equipment also. Good luck to you, Nancy.

Thanks Corliss for sharing that with me, that's awful! I know being a mother of a daughter who also had it done that it is really scary when there are complications with it and hers has been so mild compared to your daughter's. I hope your daughter's health improves and it does show the dangers of WLS, RNY in your case and how real it is and unpredictable it can be. If I was able to lose weight the band I would consider the sleeve but I need the malabsorption of the RNY. Take care, Nancy.

Corliss, Sorry your daughter had such comps from her RNY. Do you mind me asking what they were. My daughter had hers a year ago and besides a stricture has been complication free so far. My RNY is this Thursday. Thanks Nancy.

I don't know what the major difference I will feel once I have the bypass on Thursday but am looking forward to it. As one who never did well with the band this was my only choice. It's really difficult to know which surgery to choose in the first place, initially I wanted the RNY but chickend out at the last moment. In hindsite that was a mistake but I was fortuneate not to have major complications with the band and was able to have my insurance pay for the removal and revision to RNY. At my age with my comorbs I believe the RNY really is the best solution for me. I know ahead of time that any surgery can fail in the long run but I did have different expectations from the band which were not realistic. I also know that with the RNY my diabetes II will "cured" in a short amount of time. I also know that I don't have to worry about restriction variations with RNY as it will be there from the start. Dumping syndrome occurs somewhere between 40% and 50% of the people who have RNY so its not something you can count on so you still have to be careful with your sugar/fat. Drinking before and after eating is something you have to restrict also as you're basically a self flusher now because you don't have the pyloris valve anymore. And chewing very well is important so that you don't stretch your pouch or your new stoma. Anyway I'm having RNY because I want to lose weight and I didn't with the lap band. Whatever that percentage is that doesn't lose with the band I am a part of. I'll post when I can to let people know who aren't RNYers themselves what it's like to be a bypasser and compare it to being a bander. I'm curious to know what the small pouch feels like compared to a banded pouch and what foods I can tolerate etc... So whoever can come up with the best way to decide which surgery is the best fit for each individual wins the lottery in my book because it's not always an easy thing to figure out beforehand. Good luck to all of us who are having or had WLS as it's not easy for anyone, Nancy.

Good luck to you Linds, I'm having my RNY on the 11th, my daughter had it a year ago and has already lost close to 150lbs. I'm sure it's going to be much different than the band and will be a learning experience for us both, good luck, Nancy.:blushing:

Thanks Sara, I just need more help than the lap band gives, mainly the malabsorption. I wish it would have worked with just the lap band but I just was one of the unlucky ones. Good luck to you also, Nancy.

Good luck Deb, I did have to go through every thing again, including the psych eval and testing. Some of it was due to my surgeon and some due to my insurance company and some due to the fact that I'm revising. It's good that your husband is involved anyway, maybe he can come up with questions that you won't think of and he's also a back up if you forget something. It sounds like your ball is rolling a lot faster than mine did though so that's a good thing. Keeps us posted! Take care Nancy.

Doug and I often think of the life we'd have - read, how freaking rich we'd be - if we didnt have kids, lol. Wait till your "kids" are in their 20s and living at home going to college and grad school. That's when they really milk you dry! But of course you want your children educated and to have a better life than you had so we do it.......

I think if you want to learn more about DS you might want to check out wwwobesityhelp.com. I thought about it before I got my band removed as it seemed like the most fail proof surgery but for me it meant traveling over two hours and I didn't feel good about that. Also my daughter had RNY a year ago and so I've first hand experienced that along with her and I'm hoping that will be the right procedure for me this time. Also I have faith in my surgeon and he wouldn't recomend that surgery for me at my size. He does three procedures and DS is not one of them. Anyway good luck with your decision, I wouldn't push any surgery as it we all know what works for one doesn't necessarily work for all. It takes a lot of time to figure it out and it took me six months before I had faith enough to go on to revise. I know that you'll research this as a revisioner it's serious business! Take care Nancy.