1gorgeousgodzilla

You are only confirming my decision not to divulge the details of my upcoming surgery with my co-workers. They already scrutinize who eats what at office gatherings, so heaven forbid I eat half a donut or something after the procedure. I know they will be waiting for some sort of failure or re-gain no matter what I do.
So. . . Make your haters your motivators! I plan on being the most fabulous and toned me I can be! Every NSV and weight milestone will be my personal eff you to the naysayers.
Jennifer

I'm an attorney and the only people that have asked what was I out for are my fellow attorneysq for the most part. The environment Im in daily is one of "friendly competition"-minus the friendly part. The few people I was friends with beforehand knew as soon as I had a surgery date. I have no desire to share any information whatsoever with these other Johnny-come-lately's. and it's not due to shame- I'd be the same way if they asked my shoe size or what I did last weekend.
Oddly enough everyone else I see just says I look great. It's no secret that I work out several days a week, so I'm guessing that's what most attribute it to.

I've been reading this thread for the last couple of days.... I have started to answer once or twice only to erase and say why bother.
The fact of the matter responses from people that are further out often fall on deaf ears to the newly or about to be sleeved..
They (I did too) like to here the good not the bad.
Yes I have (not had) a food addiction. I am a binge (in secret) eater so I can relate to those of you that do it in secret.
When I first talked about wanting this surgery my husband said "why? You never eat".. I have since opened up to him and told him my dirty secrets.
Ok first off the sleeve DOES NOT CURE food ADDICTION! I need to get that out there. I read lipstick lady's response about it stopping her by throwing up. And another poster two weeks out agreeing with her and assuming this is the way it's going to be for everyone. Not so.
I love you lipstick you know that! But not all of us puke. I have not puked since being in the hospital.
Also the first 6 months? You are still healing believe it or not and for some of us it's easier to stay on track.. I say some of us because more and more I read posts from people that are very early out and are already falling back into their addictive ways. I didn't only because I was scared and followed what my doctor said to do.
Ok things change after the so called "honeymoon" period eating gets easier and you get hungrier and your capacity increases all at the same time like butter said.
But let's get back to addiction. I am an addict I ate when I was not hungry I ate till there was pain. So the pain of being full is not a new sensation.I would stuff food and I would wait and eat again. Obviously my need for food was not my stomach it was my head (and my mouth that constantly watered for food and the want to chew, taste).
The sleeve did not cure this. Yes it's a great tool and I've lost some weight, But I fight my addiction everyday still. Maybe I'm just hard core messed up..more than the rest? Maybe not. I see lots and lots of people that have had surgery and lose initially only to gain it back.. So I'm going to guess I'm not the only one that's got a problem with food.
I still wake up thinking about food and a lot of times I go to bed thinking about it. I still sneak into the kitchen and stuff something in my mouth when no one is looking (yes as I said I am a sneak eater) I'm succeeding for the most part. But I am still an addict and I will be the rest of my life.
Also the fact of the matter is junk food goes down so much easier than dense Protein ( you know the stuff we are supposed to eat) so it can really play with that addicted brain that wants more and more.
My name is Laura I am addicted to food and I'm a year out from VSG surgery.

Agreed Cheri. That's why I always say it's important to take advantage of that honeymoon period while you can. And make good eating habits part of your life sooner rather than later. I see people all the time saying I eat this and that crap food and I'm losing just fine. Good luck. For many people, you can eat cupcakes 3 meals a day and still lose in the honeymoon period.
But I'm here to tell you for most people the day comes when your appetite comes screaming back, your eating capacity doubles, your weight loss screeches to a halt because your metabolism equals out with your intake.....and it all seems to happen at once....and seemingly overnight. That will not be the time to start figuring out good eating practices. You don't want to have to go on a diet at that point.

Yes. When I was new there weren't many old timers hanging around. There was no vets board. There was no real picture of life in the 2+ years timeframe.
And I was one of "those people" that insisted that the only way to regain is if you try really hard and overeat or binge all the time. It's not true! Your body is a freaking miracle and it will adapt to ANYTHING, and that includes learning how to pack on a few pounds because you ate an extra couple hundred calories each day over the weekend. I find I have to be stricter with my intake 3+ years out. Once I'm in my window, I pretty well stick to a five pound range, IF I stick to doing a 6:1 or 5:2 method. Regain isn't an issue if I weigh daily and pick a day or two a week to hit the shakes hard and go all Protein.
But loss? Losing seven pounds is all I want, post pregnancy. And I've been trying for MONTHS. It's hard. It gets harder to lose the weight the longer you're small. It gets easier to pack pounds on the farther out you get.
This is to anyone relying wholly on their sleeve to make good choices: STOP. Start doing it yourself. Because my sleeve can hold a lot of the wrong foods. If I wanted, I could eat a slice of pizza every few hours and still pack on a few pounds. It addresses quantity, but only quantity of good choices. Do not rely on your sleeve to make those good choices for you.
I still hesitate to say I've had a regain. I got pregnant, and am having trouble losing those last stupid few pounds. But this is not the easy, effortless slide it was early out. Do not for one minute think that you'll be able to avoid regains and make good choices based upon the capacity of your sleeve alone. It takes effort, it takes a huge amount of willpower and it takes never-ending diligence to stay in your healthy weight range.
Three years out and no food is off limits. Some foods make me uncomfortable, but I can eat anything I want. And if I go sloppy on diet, I can easily fit in upwards of 2,000 calories a day, tiny sleeve be damned. I can easily eat upwards of 2 cups of food in one sitting if I choose the foods that will slide.
In the end? I have a tool. A darn good tool that I'm incredibly grateful to have. But it really boils down to me vs. the food. The sleeve only works if you work it, and that gets more tiring, more boring and harder to do the farther out from surgery you get.
We still get to succeed. I don't want to be defeatist. But don't think that it's as easy as it is that first nine months for the whole haul. It's not! Challenges are very common around one year post op, and losing regains of even ten piddly pounds can take more than half a year once you're farther out.
~Cheri

I came from 215- 132 a 83 pound lost

You look wonderful!!!
The FBI's face recognition software may have a hard time with you. :ph34r:

I'm seven weeks post op and I have a looong way to go, but your pictures are an inspiration to me. i took some pictures this weekend and compared them to what I looked like only few weeks before my surgery (8/19/13). Can't believe the difference already and can't wait to see what I look like by new year's.
Also flew this weekend and it was the first time in YEARS that I fit in the seat without making the armrest pop up or having to practically jam myself against the window side so that I wouldn't "ooze" over to the adjoining seat! Flying has been a huge source of anxiety for me-so grateful for my sleeve!

Please add dagooden@aol.com to your fitbit friends

Looks like you are doing a great job and I can definitely tell a difference In your waist line! I think we are loosing in the same pattern. Pants aren't falling off me yet, but my silhouette has a definite "S" curve going on now

Just went back East for a visit after 5 years.
Saw an old beau who looked amazed and said "You got prettier as you got older. That's not supposed to happen!" Um, thanks?
And my mom's cousin exclaimed "You look HOT! If you weren't related, I'd set you up with my son." Again, thanks?

I don't care one way or the other if anyone tells or not. After hearing about some of the people ya'll work with, I wouldn't want to talk to them either!
I guess it just depends on one's personality and circumstances.
Circumstances-wise: I have wonderful colleagues at work, and we all support each other with personal challenges. Several of my colleagues are overweight and walk together at lunch; we have a health/fitness directorate at work with a bariatric nutritionist on campus; we have an annual "Portion Off the Pounds" program and everyone in the CLASS shares their eating habits/goals; we have three gyms -- all free.
Personality-wise: I was married to an abusive alcoholic for nearly 20 years. On top of that, I was GAY the whole time! With the help of therapy and Al-Anon, I came to see all of the secrets I'd been spinning/holding as TOXIC to me and my growth. So I started a personal policy of 100 percent honesty.
Now, I'm very frank and open with everyone with whom I have ANY type of relationship; work, neighbor, family, volunteer, kids' friends, etc. My feeling now is: if they don't get it, I'm willing to invest the time in educating them about alcholism, domestic violence, equal rights, and -- yes -- bariatric surgery! If they're not interested in either learning something new about the world or about me, of if they just can't "stomach" it, fine. But if they are, then I've done some good in the world, expanded my circle of support, and opened someone's mind.
All of those benefits are worth whatever risks I face. I am 100 percent me, honest, transparent and accountable 100 percent of the time. It's only made my life better and better and better. No "privacy?" NO PROBLEM! And no, I'm not stupid about cybersecurity/information security. In fact, it's part of my professional industry.
BTW, I work for the Department of Defense with military officers from the Joint services and from all over the world, and I'm often the FIRST out gay person they've ever met. I get a lot of appreciation -- and a lot of disclosures from others! -- in response to my visibility.
I'm sorry about my "shame" comment earlier. Obviously, that's not the case with everyone (although I'm sure it IS the case with some). But I never again want to live in fear of the risks of sharing ANYTHING about myself that's important to me. If I worked somewhere that imposed that risk, or had relationships with people who imposed that risk -- I wouldn't for long.

Good article and another reason we all should stop overly comparing our weight loss to someone else. Way too many variables involved such as male vs female, low BMIer vs high BMIer, someone in their 20's vs someone in their 60's, etc. So it makes little sense to compare weight loss with another.....especially if you're a woman in her 60's with a low BMI comparing to a 25 year old guy who was a high BMI'er.
I can relate to the part where many guys are linear thinkers and see it as a task or to do list.....

I'm an attorney and the only people that have asked what was I out for are my fellow attorneysq for the most part. The environment Im in daily is one of "friendly competition"-minus the friendly part. The few people I was friends with beforehand knew as soon as I had a surgery date. I have no desire to share any information whatsoever with these other Johnny-come-lately's. and it's not due to shame- I'd be the same way if they asked my shoe size or what I did last weekend.
Oddly enough everyone else I see just says I look great. It's no secret that I work out several days a week, so I'm guessing that's what most attribute it to.

I am able see the pics and there are changes, most notably in your waist. In the fist pic, your breasts and belly are almost on the same plane. In the second picture your belly is waaay behind your boobs. its hard to see changes in ourself, but they are there. Unfortunately my top half is the first place I'm losing significant inches.

Ok I've had a long gluttonous weekend and my mood is foul...
First off this argument is as old as the hills around here. So played out I can't believe I'm responding.
Second, there is nothing wrong in either way..
Third, if you lose the weight then try to sell profit mislead, like selling weight loss pills, wraps, or a gyms before and after THEN ITS LYING!
Fourth? Who gives a flying f**k..
Ok told you I was foul...
Red wine, moonshine and cupcakes don't mix 0_0

Okay. I really don't understand why people who tell make this about shame or pride for the rest of us and I really think you should stop making assumptions about other people's feelings. I told no one about my surgery other than my husband and my children. Initially I told my Mom, Dad, and Sister. I come from a family of lawyers so they all went immediately into protective mode. My sister wanted the name of the anesthesiologist so that she could access her law enforcement database and run a background check on him. My mother wanted to fly in to meet with the doctor and both my parents wanted to look into whether he had been sued before. I didn't need all that anxiety and stress so I told them I changed my mind. I told them three months post-op that I had the surgery. I don't share a lot of personal things with my co-workers because that is what they are, not my friends, and we are all professionals. Why in the world would I engage in discussions that might be controversial at work??? I don't do it about politics or religion; why would I do it about something as personal as my health? Do my co-workers need to know that I may be a little tired or bitchy today because I am on my period? No. That is an inappropriate conversation for work. I am not ashamed of having a period for goodness sakes! It's just none of their business. Should I tell them I have green slime coming out of my nose because I have a sinus infection? Gross, no. But, I am not ashamed to have a sinus infection. Should I tell them when I have the runs because of a stomach bug? No. It's not professional. It has nothing to do with shame. There is another big reason that I don't tell most people about WLS. I had an amazing and fantastic recovery. I literally had surgery on a Thursday and I was in the office on Monday. I do not want everyone thinking that their experience will be like mine and running out to do this. The decision to have WLS is a highly personal one. Most of us come to it after a lot of reflection and research. Once people become interested in surgery as a way to control their weight they will do the research and come to their own decision. A couple of co-workers who were either struggling with their own weight and resulting medical problems or have family members who struggle have come to me privately in my office to ask about my weight loss. I have been open with those couple of people and they have not shared it with others to my knowledge. If they have so be it. I knew that once I told another person there was no controlling the information. Maybe those of you proclaiming that the rest of us are ashamed are projecting and the shame is really something you have been dealing with all of your life and this is just the latest expression of it. But, I will step back and not attempt to psychoanalyze you or assign feelings to you. I have never been ashamed and my weight has never held me back from doing anything I wanted to do. I promised myself when I had kids that weight was my issue not theirs. If they wanted to swim then darn it I was putting on a swim suit and going swimming. Perhaps those of you accusing others of shame do not realize that it is offensive. I'm telling you it is.

Well said!!!!!

During my psych evaluation, the doc recommended not to tell anyone. He had also had WLS, so I found it interesting to hear his perspective. In the end, I agreed with him and decided it wasn't anyone's business to hear the details of my surgery unless I wanted to share for my own reasons. So for anyone who asks about my weight loss (as it is becoming more obvious), I say I've been on a strict high-protein diet since June and it's finally paying off (completely true), and if anyone wonders if I had surgery (I anticipate someone will ask at some point), I will say I was solving some "female issues" (technically true! LOL). It's up to you how much you tell, but for me I didn't want to feel under the microscope with how/what I was eating or how fast I losing weight. Good luck to you, this is a delicate topic and people can be amazingly rude!

My doctor put abdominal surgery on all my paperwork, so it could be hernia, fibroids, heck even gall bladder for all anyone knew. Thus far, I've been able I get away with saying I Had a surgery that should help me with my back pain (and surprisingly it has). However there is ALWAYS ONE that just said what exactly did you have. At that point I acted outraged and said "I can't believe you just asked me that, but if you MUST KNOW I had abdominal surgery of a delicate nature to help with back pain and I not discussing this further". That has shut it down.
I work in a pit of vipers and don't have time for their negativity. I'm not ashamed that I had the surgery, but my work environment is not the most Conducive for sharing, shall we say.

I, too, have a "happy place" that is higher than I want but I have had to just accept this is the case. Otherwise it's a constant diet/battle to keep those few pounds off. And we're talking two-three pounds! Makes no real difference to anything except my head.
But congrats on hitting goal even if you bounced - I told you it was just a check the box thing, anyway. Now you've checked the box and can move on!
~Cheri

Update....Well I hit my goal weight (215) a few weeks ago, but that didn't last long. I'm already back up to 219.....but some of that is Water weight since I started back on creatine. A well hydrated muscle gives me that extra rep on each set and extra set at each lift, so it's worth it to me. Also upped my cals slightly, by 300 or so a day. I felt a little weak after hitting my goal and really restricting my calories for a couple of months to get there. So I think the low 220's is my comfy place. I know years (hopefully decades) down the road as my metabolism slows further, the 220's will be hard to maintain.

I didn't have a ton of weight to lose to begin with but I was still way over weight and very unhealthy. My blood pressure could not be controlled with the max dosage of meds and I had to use cholesterol meds to control my LDL, had joint pain and I was at 320 pounds about a few years ago. During the 2-3 years pre-op, I fluctuated between 280 and 315.
I've lost slow, other than the first 2-3 months after surgery (see signature below). I may not get to my goal of 215, but I still haven't stopped losing and I'm almost 15 months post-op. The last several months I've probably only averaged a pound or two loss a month and I'm currently at 227 (not terribly bad for 6'-3"). But I'm also still losing inches, which lets me know the fat is dropping slowly and I'm actually adding muscle and getting stronger every month. I see this in my max lifts in the gym, so I'll take the pound or two of fat loss a month, especially if I can continue that during all of my second year post-op. If so, that would put me at my goal by the end of this second year. Also, when I put that 215 goal out there, it was just a number that I was told to give myself and to shoot for it. Sometimes goals can be measured by more than just what is on the scale. My body fat has gone from around 35% to about 16-17%, I'm off my blood pressure meds completely now with normal range BP, off my cholesterol meds, joint pain in my knees are gone and I feel MUCH better! So slow loss on the scales for me has not been indicative of my overall progress since surgery. My main goals always were to get healthier and off my meds and I have done that. Any other benefits are just gravy for me (pun intended) and I am very appreciative of this surgery even though I've not lost heaping amounts of weight.

My Before and After. Surgery date was May 22,2013..Sw:280 Cw:220

HW: 269
SW: 265
CW: 203
Height: 5'1
Surgery date : July 8th 2013