gamergirl

Wow, amazing progress! Congrats.

We make soup today! Shrimp Bisque and Chicken & Mushroom, both pureed. I don't know how to shop or cook for small meals. I barely have pots in the house small enough for our new meals. I take out the cauliflower I bought. I picked the smallest one at the market. The WLS Surgery recipe calls for 1 cup for four people. That's about a fourth of the entire dang cauliflower. What am I supposed to do with the rest? The chicken soup recipe calls for 1/2 lb of chicken. I have no idea what size pot I need to cook that little chicken. I've been cooking for a family since I was 14, and here I am at 47, I can't guesstimate the right pot size for so little food. I've been telling R he will have to stop going to Costco but I don't think he quite believed me until he saw the proportions of food we're cooking. Forget Costco, I think I may need to start buy veggies at the Salad bar instead of at the grocery! And after all that? I eat 2 oz and R can get in 4 oz of the soup before we're too full for more! Friends want to come visit to check on us. We start to clean the house and to cook something for them. After several hours of whirl winding around, we are SO tired that my tummy hurts. R is cranky and over-sensitive and has to go lie down after he loses it with the kids and me over nothing. The hormone thing is doing a whammy on him for sure. We give him hugs and reassure him we still love him, and then sit down to eat as a family. I decide we will have to let our friends know we are not up for company yet. We're really, really not. At all. We may not hurt, but we tire easily and then we get cranky. Need to tread slowly still. R and I go to lie down in our bed at 1 pm. The kids follow as does the dog. We spend the rest of the day hanging about together, all of us on our computers, chatting occasionally, resting, reading, and playing with the dog. From time to time, I get up to make food/snacks for the kids, and R gets up to make our soups. THIS is how you recover on a Saturday after surgery my friends. Soul-food time, with no food, just love to feed your soul. And a little soup maybe.

Wow! Amazing difference! Congratulations.

I really, really wish I could. I own my own business and while my employees rock, sometimes clients don't appreciate that you can't be there for them. I'm really trying not to overdo it.

R is now walking 2 miles! He says he's been doing that since day 3 and I didn't even know. We're both pretty much back to normal except for the fact that we tire very easily. We will laze about today but the food images will not leave me alone. I want to BITE into something. Anything! I spend significant portions of time thinking about food, recipes, pinning, thinking of what I will cook when I can. And I realize it's really, really, good to have this time when I cannot, in fact, eat anything. All of us who complain about the liquid diet afterwards, it's our "break up with food" time. As with any breakup, you miss the loser, you love/hate him, but you're so glad you did it. Why did I think this would be any different? It's not. Note this. It's not any different than a breakup with a person you loved. We got all our liquids in, we got all the protein in, but we've gotten creative about recipes. We make unjury chicken with Ramen flavoring, with taco seasoning, and today, R makes his perfect spicy tortilla soup and we eat just the broth. It has adobo chilies in it and we love it! We're not having any trouble with spice which is a relief to us. R is struggling with a popsicle addiction. They're calling him. As soon we can do soups tomorrow, I will talk to him about throwing them out and getting his carbs via pureed veggies. We don't need to be back on sugar. Someone said they cheated on their pre-op and I wrote a very harsh post back saying if you can't stay on your diet pre-op, how do you think you will do it post-op when cheating could mean death? We're all so focused on getting through the pre-op that we don't realize post-op liquid is even LONGER for some of us. Make no mistake about it, the post-op diet is harder. You can't eat. You can't drink except in sips. It's weeks until you will feel normal. It's much harder. Buckle up.

Day Six (Thursday) Since I was feeling so much better, I thought I'd be able to work today. I'm realizing that physical recover and mental alertness are NOT the same thing. I'm in a complete daze and am having so much trouble focusing. I wasted the entire morning in front of the computer doing....I have no idea what. Nothing to show for it. Three meetings in a row took it out of me. Then I had to go to Dallas for a meeting and R offered to drive me. Well, his brain isn't working any better than mine. We were late getting out of the house due to poor decision making. We got lost on the way because we couldn't talk and drive at the same time apparently. By the time we got there, we were both stressed and late. By the time we finished the meeting and started back home in rush hour, getting lost a couple of times--seriously it was ridiculous. I mean we have a GPS! and 2 iphones and 2 ipads and we couldn't find our way back home!--we were so tired. Again fuzzy decisioning, we decide to go to a restaurant to get a spicy drink. We get to the restaurant and realize the drink has too much sugar. So we go to the Indian grocery and then spend an hour trying to get tins to fit together. Don't ask. Utter stupidity, but done with great concentration and dedication. At the end of this we are SO tired, that when we get home, I can't even make myself get up to take my makeup off. Both of us are bone tired. I was not prepared for this. I just thought if we felt better, we'd be back to normal. Apparently recovery takes longer than 6 days. Who woulda thunk?

When pre-sleeved, I wondered what it was going to feel like right after the surgery. i read everything I could, but I still wanted more, more, more. I'm writing about my experiences to give back to the community that helped me prepare for this surgery. It's a very long post but hopefully it answers some questions about what we might go through, physically, mentally and emotionally. I'm 5'6, HW 230, SW 222, CW 215.4 and I'm 47 years old. Day of Surgery (Friday) I find myself calm, not nervous and ready and prepared thanks to hours spent on this site. I move to a gurney where they inject me, and the next thing i know I'm waking up and there's an oxygen mask on my nose.I keep trying to take it off, and they tell me not to, that I need the oxygen. I fight it a little. Finally, I say I know I'm not supposed to take it off, but I need to breathe, I'll put it back. The doctor checks on me and sees me fighting it, and says it's okay to take it off. I tell them I'm nauseated and they give me something. I feel so little pain that in my dream state, I keep waking up from a half-sleep thinking, Oh I have to go to surgery today. And then my brain reminds me it's already over. I can't believe it. My husband comes out of his surgery and once he is awake, I make him walk with me. We push our IVs along, marveling at how okay we feel. I'm okay, he's not so great. He's nauseated his chest feels tight, but there's not too much pain. We walk all day in little bits. My mouth is dry but I rinse it several times, and use my chapstick. We're fine. Night-time is not fun. Nurses in and out every two hours, injecting one or the other of us. R has really bad heartburn so I'm trying to take care of him. We get through the night. First Day Post-Op (Saturday) Cannot WAIT for the ice chips! such a gourmet treat! They arrive and we find we can't really eat them as we should. Two little ice chips and it feels like you have an elephant on your chest. R is worrying about shoulder and chest pain, and I assure him it's not a heart-attack, just gas pains, and keep walking. I nap a lot. He sneaks out and overdoes the walking and increases his pain. But the doc says his gut sounds better than mine, and to keep in mind that pain & symptoms don't mean a poor recovery. I wonder how the heck we'll ever consume 64 oz of fluid. Second Day Post Op (Sunday) Time to go home. We get a bottle of grape juice. Yum! but again, can't imagine how I will finish that little 8 oz bottle. We drive for 12 hours today. Well, I drive. R sleeps the whole time, which is how his body recovers from anything he ever has. I'm happy to be able to do this for him. We stop in Austin to see my son, try to drink some Unjury chicken. The warm soup feels good. We sleep for an hour and I'm refreshed enough to drive home. Keep trying to drink, probably didn't even get in 16 oz this day. That night, I force the fluids and I'm miserable. Walking up and down the hallways after a long day. I realize this is a lesson. If I ever overdo the food, this is what it's going to feel like. No bueno. This is my "WTF did I just do?" day. Thanks to this forum, I know that's common and I let the emotions come. Third Day Post Op (Monday) Lots of sleeping going on but guess what? We can drink easier now! At least 38-40 oz today including a Nectar Fuzzy Navel! I'm amazed at the progress in just three days. I stop the pain pills. R is cranky and depressed today.We're arguing about stupid sh*t. I tell him it's the hormones, the trauma, the lack of calories and carbs and that it will all be okay. I do 20 mins on a stationary cycle, R walks the dog a mile. Now my brain shifts to the big changes. Such as, if I'm not always thinking of food, what am I going to do with that spare time? I kid you not. My existential crisis? What the hell am I going to pin on Pinterest now if not recipes?? I realize front and center food has been in my life and am so grateful we were able to get this surgery. Fourth Day Post Op (Tuesday) Feeling like a pro today! I forget I've had surgery and gulp. Ouch. But a shake, an unjury chicken soup, egg drop soup, 2 G-2s, and 2 popsicles! Yay me! So of course, now that is good, I'm the weepy one today. There's nothing wrong, I just want to cry. But I don't cry easily so even though I try, I can't cry . No pain, all good. R gets energy back. I'm not there yet and want to sleep. We go out to get something, I'm exhausted. But I do 2 ten minute sessions on the stationary bike. We try Chike with caffeine. Mistake. Feel sick. Today I make an important decision. In the past, I've always focused on the outcome. Was I losing weight? No? Then let me change my diet AGAIN. How about now? No? So what if it's only been 4 days I better change again. This time, I will not do that. There's a plan here. 800 calories, 80 gms of protein, less than 50 of carbs, 64 oz of water, and walking/cycling. That's it. Until I hit goal, that's the plan. Focus on the plan and the results will follow. I know this from reading others' experiences. I decide to focus on my actions and let go of the outcome. Big move for a control freak I tell R that now that I am not constantly searching for the best diet, the superfoods, the one ultimate way to lose weight, It has freed up so much psychic energy, that I'm shocked at how much of my time I had devoted to obsessing about my weight. I chose the best way for me. The time to stop looking is over. Time to start DOING. Fifth Day Post Op (Wednesday) Liquids not a problem. Protein not a problem. Can you believe that? It's only day 5 but we're getting all liquids in. What a change. I can NOT stay awake and sleep from 9:30 am - 12:30 pm though. Work intrudes and I take 3 meetings over the phone. Couldn't have done that without the nap. I feel energized. We go out to run and errand and go to the grocery store to buy ingredients for soup which we will start on Saturday while the kids are home. The grocery is full of sample ladies and although I rarely ate samples, it's a different feeling when you can't. I feel different to everyone around me. I realize that I'm different from the others around me in one more new way, but it's a way that doesn't show, unlike my skin, my weight, my ethnicity. It makes me feel like I'm harboring a secret. Weird feeling. I am happy I'll be able to cook again. I make my son an omelet with cheese, and I find I'm a little tempted but not bad. But I've had food dreams all day today. I want a grilled cheese sandwich with the crisp outer crust and the gooey cheese, I want tomato soup, I want chicken kebabs, I want, I want. I drink my shake. I will do nothing to compromise my recovery. Sixth Day Post Op (Thursday) The day has just started who knows what awaits, but R has lost 20 lbs in 3 weeks, and I've lost 15 lbs. Last time I lost 15 lbs it took 6 months of clean eating and walking 4 miles a day. I'll take this! I now believe that I will lose the weight. I was sure I was going to be that freak of nature that couldn't lose it because I only lost 6 lbs on 2 weeks of pre-op, but now I believe. Today we will do our liquids, our protein, our walk/cycle and tomorrow will be a better day. My next goal? Visualize myself thin, and be able to see myself wearing cute clothes and start pinning those on Pinterest. Not there yet. What a difference six days can make!

So so sorry to hear this. Thoughts and prayers with you.

It's almost getting to be a routine. Veg soup and Protein at every meal. An SF popsicle to wash down dinner. Yesterday was the first time I didn't need a nap and was alert, and productive throughout the day. The previous few days, I'd really started to worry about how I was going to work because I couldn't string two thoughts together and all I wanted was a nap. It's funny, I'm not really hungry, but today, I want to BITE into something--or someone, when I'm feeling cranky I haven't been as cranky as I thought I would be--but I want to CHEW something. I feel grateful that I have this opportunity to do something that seemed impossible, and win at it. It sends me into surgery with a feeling of power and control. And I need that. Being--or feeling--powerless over my weight for all these years really affects my self-image. I don't feel this helpless about anything else in my life. Tomorrow, we drive 11 hours to go to my ex-husband's wedding reception. Then Sunday we do it all over again, except in reverse. I can't eat anything at the reception. R and I will just have to have our shakes before. He's in the kitchen, getting the "travel soups" ready. Anyone who says this is the easy way out has no idea what they're talking about. I have a feeling i will be saying this with even more vehemence after the surgery when I'm in pain But hey, 7 days down, and I'm still on track. Yay me!

So I'm past the day 4 hurdle everyone talks about. I had to take a two hour nap yesterday before I could function! My brain was fuzzy and I really couldn't string two thoughts together properly. Then I started thinking about all the changes i was making all at once. 1. No caffeine. Aaargh! 2. Carbs below 50 gms a day 3. Less than 1000 calories a day 4. Much more protein than I usually intake 5. Liquids only plus veg soup. Not easy. 6. No straws 7. No fat to speak of 8. No sugar 9. No fruit 10. Constantly having to hydrate (i drink a lot of water anyway but now having to focus on it). Yeah, it's okay to have a hard time with that! On the plus side I've lost 7 lbs over the last 12 days that I've been easing into this. It makes me feel confident that I will lose weight when I'm sleeved. it's all good.

Today, I start two weeks of liquids so that I can keep R. company for his two weeks. I've eased into it by replacing one meal with a liquid all last week, which was a week of travel. I'm really happy that I was able to stick to that even with four days on the road, long days and nights, and delayed airplanes, etc. I ate almost no sugar last week, just two oreos (oops) on the delayed flight. I feel ready. The house is stocked with unjury chicken soup, all kinds of protein shakes, SF jello and popsicles. But most importantly, I'm not as hungry as I was before I started, thanks to easing in slowly. I want to feel in control of food, not the other way around. I'm feeling that right now. I know the next three days will be the hardest, and I'm prepared for that. I just want to show myself that I can do this too. It doesn't hurt that I've lost 3 lbs by just that meal replacement and reduced carbs Let's do this!