gamergirl

I'm REALLY glad you shared this! It's worrying me because I am super Alpha female. This shaking, sweating business is NOT me. It makes me feel weak and I don't like that feeling. I go toe to toe with men daily at work and I can't be the weak, shaky one. I agree, I have to let the emotions come. Luckily for me, my husband and kids are very giving people too, so they do take very good care of me when I need it. I got lucky that way

I'd make it 6 pm, because that's dinner time at our house. And you would be MOST welcome.

Bad news. I've been depressed, lethargic and feeling blah, meh, blue, and blobby for the last three days. Good news: There is absolutely NOTHING wrong IRL, so I know this is just recovery/hormones. I don't know what the heck is wrong with my body but really, everything is going well surgery-wise. No problem with intake, protein, fluids, etc. Blood tests came back looking great. I'm just down. I knew this would happen, but I didn't think it would last thing long. This whole week, I've struggled to do much of anything. I lack vim and vinegar and zip and zing. Over the last 3 days, it's been more pronounced. I'm sort of slug-like right now, and I'd like the old me back please. I suspect so would my employees who aren't used to me being quite so out of it. They all know I had surgery, only one of them knows what kind. R of course is bouncing all over the place like nothing happened, but I notice that he gets angry easily and is very sensitive these days--which is his version of depression. So we're both having to be a bit gentle with each other and cut the other some slack. He's been great about giving me room to be depressed instead of trying to talk me out of it. I'm trying to do the same for him. I lost a pitch yesterday. I HATE HATE HATE losing. I could not have made any profit at the price they finally paid another company, so it was okay to lose it. But what surprised me was that my body reacted immediately and badly to it. As soon as I read the email, I broke out in a cold sweat and almost passed out. No exaggeration. I think my new tummy handles emotion/adrenaline differently. I noticed this when we tried to watch a movie right after the surgery and the rather tame thriller upset my stomach and my nervous system so badly I had to stop watching it. I think with a smaller tummy, the same rush of adrenaline doesn't feel as it used to. It's a horrible, uncomfortable, tense feeling and you want it to go away. Don't know if all adrenaline junkies have to deal with this or not, but I now know that *I* have to deal with this. I want to kick myself in the pants and "snap out of it". I'm keeping it from getting worse, but I haven't snapped out of it yet. Welcome to recovery, emo-style

My dad arrives from India today so I have to make something his 90-year body (and teeth) can enjoy, AND tomorrow is soft foods day for us! yay! We were told to eat meats that were out of a crockpot or pressure cooker so they were soft. So here goes. This is massively modified from Anupy Singla's Indian Crockpot book to a) not make enough to feed the entire state of Texas and not to blow the roof off your head with her version of spice. I'm Indian. Believe me when I tell you, this is the BEST chicken curry I have ever had and the EASIEST. Ingredients 1 onion peeled & quartered 5 garlic cloves peeled 2 inches ginger root sliced roughly 2 tomatoes, quartered I tsp salt 1/2 tsp cayenne pepper 2 tsp turmeric 1 tsp garam masala, can buy ready mixed or use this recipe 1/2 cup greek yogurt 1.5 lbs of chicken, skinned 1 bag of baby spinach 1 2 inch piece cinnamon 4 green cardamom 2 whole cloves Method 1. In a food processor, grind together everything except the chicken and the spinach and whole spices. Make a nice, smooth paste. This may take a few minutes, be patient. 2. Put the chicken pieces in a crockpot, and pour over the yummy-smelling sauce you just made. Put in whole spices 3. Chop up the spinach and add during the last hour of cooking. 4. Cook on low for 8 hours or high for 4 until chicken is tender. Us Sleevers may have to eat the chicken without the sauce and eat the sauce separately. Makes 6 servings of chicken (3 oz each, 21 gms of protein each.

I hope I wasn't harsh, but maybe I was, if so I apologize. I am sure I will have failures too, this appears to be a lifelong thing, and who amongst us is perfect? I do hope that I get both support and good advice when I come here.

I'm not that well-travelled yet. I'm only about 3 weeks post-op. But I can tell you, the post-op is MUCH harder than the pre-op. It's weeks and weeks where you are tired, you can't eat, you're hungry, you're nauseous, it would be easier to eat something that sounded good than have another Protein shake, you can't get your fluids in, your protein counts are in the toilet, you're in pain, you haven't chewed anything for five weeks...it's one thing after another for a few weeks, and that's with NO complications. And the problem is, a mistake could kill you, cause a leak, compromise your staples, or land you in the ER with some issues. The pre-op is a good time to learn compliance. I am not the best rule follower in the world. But if it's a choice between following rules and dying, I know which one I need to do. I hope I didn't come across as preachy. Opinionated, yes, preachy, no

Oops! That was supposed to be water Thanks for the catch.

Laura-ven posted a thread on why this is very bad for your body. I learned a lot from reading it. Hope you can find it, very illuminating.

So my two cents only, based on my limited experience and knowledge of myself. I can rationalize ANYTHING if I try hard enough. chocolate become a source of antioxidants, pizza becomes a balanced food, cake becomes an indulgence that keeps me from binging...on and on. Don't do that. Don't tell yourself it's okay because pickles are not that bad for you, it could have been something worse, etc. etc. The rules for the liquid pre-op are pretty simple. Don't break them. This is your chance to change your behaviors, to do something that seems impossible, and to SUCCEED at it. To go into surgery knowing you can succeed, and that you gave yourself the best chance for a successful outcome. Don't deprive yourself of that win. My post will likely be followed by some who will tell you what I think you want to hear--which is that it was okay. I hope you read mine and think of what I'm saying as well though. I remember your earlier post where I think you said you broke the pre-op too and wonder if you might benefit from talking to someone before the surgery? You now have another chance to get it right. Rooting for you to get there!

Modified from Bee Yinn Low's Easy Chinese Recipes. Ingredients 4 cups low-sodium chicken broth 1 Tbsp soy sauce 1 Tbsp Chinese black vinegar 1.5 Tbsp Chinese Rice Vinegar 1/4 tsp salt 2 Tbsp corn starch 3 Tbsp Water 1/2 Tbs Chili Oil 4 Large eggs, beaten lightly Method 1. Mix and heat broth, sauces and vinegars. 2. In a small bowl, mix the corn starch and vinegars 3. When broth is boiling, slowly incorporate the cornstarch mix. Keep stirring and let it boil for a while to thicken the broth 4. Slowly pour in the eggs. Mix three times around with chopsticks. Turn off the flame, cover the pot and let the eggs cook slowly in the broth. Note: to increase the protein content, I really think you could put in some extra-silken soft tofu in there. It's a lot more "liquid" than yogurt, or jello, and should go down easy. If you want, put about 2-3 oz of soft tofu before adding the eggs. Makes 5-6 cups.

I'm also not losing inches right now which makes it tougher. But I've only measured bust, waist, hips and bra band. I'm sure if I'd gone the whole hog, maybe I'd see an inch off my thighs or something. It's a mind-set issue and an emotional hardiness that I have to develop, to overcome my years of traumatic experiences with not losing.

I'm so excited about your surgery! This forum has tied me to people in wonderful ways and I definitely feel connected to you. Can't wait to see how it goes for you! Do keep us posted and know I will be thinking of you.

Just because I understand why we plateau from time to time doesn't mean I have to like it. Which is just as well, because I do not like it. I thought I would be really blase and nonchalant during this time of stalling because intellectually, I was prepared for it. What I'm realizing is that intellectual is the least of my problems. Isn't it always emotions that give you the highs and lows in life? How do you prepare for that? How do you prepare for the fact that your heart and your head will clash, and that you will start to wonder if you are a freak of nature? That you are doing something wrong, hence the stall? That you were so excited about the weight coming off, and now, you're not losing any for a little bit? How do you keep the faith, that this is the thing that's going to work when every other diet you've tried has failed? It brings back emotions and memories of all the other times I've tried whole-heartedly to lose weight by following the "latest science" and failed. Every one of those diets had oodles of testimonials of people that had made that plan work, and had lost all kinds of weight from doing it. I was the only freak of nature that couldn't lose it--or so I thought. Of course, I see from this board that there were thousands of others, equally frustrated and equally unsuccessful. But nevertheless, what worked for the vocal majority, the others did not work for me, in those cases. It brings back feelings of failure, or lack of success, of fear that nothing was ever going to work. I suppose it is possible that the sleeve is the same for me--but I know it is not probable. Fortunately, both R and I are stalled. If one of us was losing and the other wasn't, there would all kinds of conversation and superstitious behavior about mimic'ing exactly what the other was doing to lose the weight. Fortunately we've been spared that madness. This time. Next time it may not work like that so how are we going to get ready for that next time? Even though I told myself there would be no second guessing, I am of course, second guessing. It's hard for my scientist-mind to not immediately attribute the stall to the fact that we were told to increase our calories and our carbs. Never mind that we were barely functional at previous levels, and that I still have be able to function and make a living, my cause-and-effect wired brain wants to know what would happen if I went back to the old calorie and carb levels? THIS. This is what I said I would NOT do. This constant second-guessing, this "what if" scenario planning, this emotional ditch. This is what I told myself I would stay away from because I knew the "facts". So I guess time to "man up" and do that eh? Time to put my money where my mouth was, time to feel whatever I feel, but to not allow it to influence my actions. To keep to the plan, and let go out of the outcome, you big control-freak. To look at this time as a time of growth, where you learn to let go--and still succeed. So today, my task is the same as it was yesterday. Eat my protein, drink my water, exercise--and try to have a good, productive, love-filled day. Wish me luck.

Thank you! We're really enjoying it. I can do soups easier than protein shakes for sure.

I feel like a different part of my brain has been activated over the last few weeks. Look at how much we all have to learn to prepare for this surgery. When was the last time you used the words "pyloric valve" in polite conversation, on a regular basis? Eight weeks ago, I didn't realize I would be a "sleever", a "post-op" a "full liquids" stage. I was just me, loving life, my job, my husband, my kids, and reading Sci-Fi if I wanted to learn new words (China Mieville, anyone?) Unfortunately, today I also know things like "sliders", "pre-op cheating", "slow loser", "stall", "head hunger", "weight re-gain", "falling off the wagon". And now, these words I've never used before have become imbued with emotions, with meaning--and another way to judge myself and others. Now these words are emotion-laden, and I have to work to make them rational. Now, if I'm not careful, I will categorize myself by these words and find another way in which I could be seen to have failed. For someone who is as motivated as am I by the fear of failure, now these can be new weapons. Unless I refuse to let that happen. Unless I say to myself and those around me, that everyday that I stick to the plan is a successful day. That everyday I veer off the plan is an opportunity presented to me to triumph the next day. That this is my new life, and I intend to live it, enjoy it, succeed at it, and let the Universe unfold the way it should. So I will try not to throw out the old, happy life I had, and live instead by one where I can succeed or fail daily based on an outcome I may not be able to control--like when I stall, or what I lose. I can only control what I do, and that part, I know how to live by that.

Thank you! I have two more days I"ve posted. I might try to combine them here.

Omg I just made the best lobster "bisque". I made it up as I went, hence the note below. Half an onion sliced thin 3 cloves garlic smashed 1in ginger sliced thin and julienned 5 Campari tomatoes 1/2 head cauliflower 3 c chicken stock 2 tablespoons pesto 1 lb frozen langoustine or lobster (see note below) Salt Pepper Sauté onions, garlic and ginger until browned (I used ghee, you can use fat of choice or spray w Pam). Pour in chicken broth and dump everything except frozen langoustine. Season with salt and pepper. Cook until veggies are tender. Put in langoustines and cook over slow heat until cooked through. Purée soup until smooth and voila! Note: We took out two cups of soup and puréed 6 oz of langoustines. That gives us 3 oz each or 14 gms of protein! I'm saving the rest to purée with shrimp tomorrow. If I had a recipe, I might not have so much soup left over but it's very good. Rich, creamy, flavorful and maybe I won't have to do another protein shake tonight. I've had worse in pricey restaurants.

I got this from the "Eating well after weight loss surgery" book. I've modified for my usual shortcuts http://www.amazon.co...t loss surgery Ingredients 1 cup cauliflower steamed in microwave for 5 minutes until very soft Cooking Spray 1/4 c onion chopped 1 tsp chopped garlic 1 oz low fat ham (I used a little bacon) 1/4 tsp lemon pepper 1 bottle clam juice 1 c evaporated fat free milk 1/2 Lb shrimp shelled, cleaned deveined salt Pepper ( I added paprika) Directions 1. Spray large saucepan with cooking spray and cook onions, garlic & ham/bacon until soft and brown 2. Add lemon pepper, clam juice, evaporated milk, cauliflower and shrimp and let it come to a boil, stirring often. Cook until shrimp are pink. 3. Add salt, pepper, paprika. 4. Puree in vitamix or blender. SOOO yummy! Tastes like a creamy bisque with potatoes, thanks to the cauliflower. Serves 4 Calories: 130 Protein: 22 gms (!!) Fat: 1.3 gms Carbs: 11 gms

I massively modified this recipe from http://www.amazon.co...ian slow cooker. The original recipe calls for 2 lbs of spinach and makes so much a sleever would be eating it until they died. It's also waaaay too spicy in the original and hers is made in the crockpot. MUCH faster in pressure cooker. Ingredients 1 lb fresh baby spinach Peel where necessary and roughly chop: -1 large yellow onion -2 medium tomatoes -5 cloves of garlic -1 2 inch piece of ginger -1 serrano or jalapeno chili 2 tablespoons ground cumin (grind in coffee grinder yourself or buy amongst mexican spices) 1 tsp or less cayenne pepper. Put less, you can add more later 2 tsp garam masala (can buy in most stores) 2 tsp turmeric 2 tsp Salt 1 packet fried or fresh paneer (indian grocery store, frozen section). I will also post recipe for homemade since this is good source of vegetarian high protein. Directions Pressure Cooker: If making in pressure cooker, dump all ingredients except paneer together and set to high pressure for 4 mins. Crockpot: Cook on high for 3 hours. Push the spinach down once so all gets moist. When done, use as immersion blender and mush everything up into either a very smooth puree, or leave some bits unchopped, per your diet stage. Gently add paneer until mixed in. Serves 6 Calories: 139 Fat: 9 Carbs: 9 Protein:10

Made up this recipe tonight by simplifying a cookbook one. Very rich mushroom flavor. Enjoy! 1 onion sliced thin 3 gloves garlic crushed 4 c mixed fresh mushrooms 1 sweet potato peeled and diced 1lb boneless skinless chicken breast 3 c Chicken Stock Salt pepper Dried Oregano & thyme or Poultry Seasoning 2 c water or broth for pureeing Simple Recipe: put all ingredients In a pot and boil until chicken is tender (medium low). Purée adding 2 additional c of broth or more. Slightly more fidgety recipe: Sauté onions and garlic until soft and lightly caramelized. Caramelize sweet potato at the edges. Add remaining ingredients. Pressure cook for 7 mins (high) or cook on stove until chicken is tender (low-medium heat). Purée adding stock to thin as necessary. This is how I made it to get the sweetness and a richer depth of flavor from the veg, but it will taste good either way. Makes 10 cups. Each c has 1.5 oz of chicken for 11 gms of protein.

Me too. I hate mayo, couldn't care less about ranch or sour cream. But cake! If I'm dying, please offer me either cake or Biryani (Indian spicy rice and chicken) and watch me come back to life.

before surgery, I used to put on 4 lbs the week of my period. Maybe that's what's happening with you? This was my week as well, I am very down today, no doubt due to the hormones, and I didn't lose anything. In fact, I made sure to drink my water, and my weight went up a pound. I'm sure that's a lot of what is going on with you as well. It will pass and we'll both feel better soon. In the meantime, (((((hugs)))))

This is how it happened with me and and my husband. I told him I was doing it, and asked for his help in encouraging me to stay on plan. What resonated with him was I said I had no idea how long I would live, but I intended to spend that time as a thin person, able to do things I wanted to before I died. He realized he wanted the same thing. I can NOT tell you how beneficial it has been to have a buddy go through it at the same time. We did our pre-op together, we had surgery the same day, and now we're recovering together. We can support each other, we can share experiences, and we can take care of each other. I don't know if your sister lives close by, but it would be so good for both of you to be able to help each other through this, even if she lives far away.

I'm so glad you posted about this, because I too have wondered if will have the faith and conviction this time to GET RID of the bigger sizes, and believe that this time, this time I won't need them again. I'm not sure.

Thank you! What an interesting idea. i will try this when we can eat food, which is only about half an eternity away.