Jennifur

Terry - HUGS big giant ones.. I know the feeling Pamela - didn't it feel kind of good to confess even to yourself. Right before surgery, I had a ton of issues come out and said a few out loud, unfortunately to the friend who is no longer a friend, she knows more about me than anyone - even myself at times. I'm very sorry about your mom. Kat - that sounds like a great plan - how do we make it happen? LOL well off to work, will check in tonight

I dont get to watch too much tv... I am going to save the Biggest Looser that starts on Tuesday. Maybe to motivate the hell out of me, or give me some new ideas. Plus if those people can do it without surgery and without tucks... so can I. Morning Violets. well another horrible night of sleep. Went to bed at 12:30 and was up by 1. for some reason my legs ache. Maybe from Water aerobics on Wed and then taking a day off. I don't know but I do know I didn't want to get up this morning. So I am off to another aerobics class this morning - then running to pay a couple of bills and going to get my camera from my friend. and to work at 2... YIKES

Ok dbf just called to say goodnight. he mentally lost most of today so after i told him i was glad i was ok, i wanted to kill him... He has been officially dignosed with depression the worst kind ( i don't recall exactally what he said - sometimes mymind works on o/t just obsorbing what is going on) and short term memory loss, so between the 2, he looses what he is doing or thinking and then gets so upset about it he just goes to sleep and doesn't care about anything. He went from 280 down to 205 between the accident, when he was in the hospital they discovered his heart was 85% blocked and had surgery, rehab, the whole nine yards. So he was getting stronger, stopped eating burgers and am cheese and mayo and went to rehab and the gym every day. The more he doesn't care the worst it gets, no gym, not eating as well, and has gained 15lbs in a month. He cares but doesn't if that makes sense. it is a horrible place and not good for me either. I just want him well, with or without me, the entire thing breaks my heart. An I get my money no matter what, he has disability and military pay - just changes when i get it. He was always a leader, strong and funny and now he is sad, and angry - his yard is a huge mess and overgrown up to your knees, his pool is yucky and has a hole in the liner and he - mr clean cut military man - had longer hair than I ever have seen on him in 20 years. It is horrible. I love him so much as I'm sure you all know, but right now I just want him well anyway, that sums up that saga in my life. I just can't get sucked back in myself

Kat - well that is good at least her name didn't cross with yurs pulling credit or cause a problem there Yes I always think the worst when he goes missing, the night of his motorcycle accident could have possibly been 1 of the 2 worst nights of my life, 1 not knowing and finding out a couple hrs later and the other when my bf of 20 years hung himself, 3 years ago last month. He doesn't get it why i worry so much

nice job TracyKS - so proud of you.

Kat - what a mess. Working in the Mortgage industry for 15 years... I have to agree.... it is almost impossible to get it fixed. You might want to start by requesting a copy of your credit report so you can make sure you don't have the dead woman's stuff on there. it takes months of letter writing and verification to get that cleaned up. You get a free copy once a year. Write to all 3 bureaus. That is a good place to start. Laura - OMG that is just insane. Are they going to pay your Water bill? well. I'm home just relaxing, visited with a couple neighbors, kids are in bed and nothing for me to do. I should go to bed... but i won't so earlier today dbf called and said he would be over in 30 mins.. I fell asleep and while I was sleeping, I had 3 missed calls with no voice mails. 1st call showed up private, 5 mins later another private call (which means someone has a private number - it is not a business) and the 3rd call was a number that showed up but I get no answer, like it was a payphone or something, still no message. I can't get in touch with dbf and he never showed up. I know he has head issues but omg, I am actually very worried about him. He never just completely vanishes on me. I did a reverse lookup on the number and it just says it is a landline and that is it. Tell me either way I'm not worried to death about him. OMG - seriously - this is a ton of the relationship problems and he doesn't understand why I get so tense. I know i know... dump dbf... so many issues... I wish he didn't get into that stupid accident. He just looses time and memories and it is sad and scary. So until the day comes when i just can't take the stress of this, i will worry about him.

hi ladies. TracyK - so glad DD is good to go... i knew she would be fine Laura - that doesn't sound fun either way. He could just have some pollups (sp) or something that is blocking him up... tell him to eat veggies and Fiber LOL well, off to bring dd to cheerleading, ds is tired and cranky so he is going to bed the second we get back. oh, I spend an hour on the phone with child support today - no one who works for dbf's company has received the monthly check, but i did find out that he may be getting some lump sum bonus from work and they put in for state and federal taxes so when he files his return in Feb I'll get $1200 of that. at least that is a start

TracyK- did you try the fiberone cereal? it really works, i was not going for weeks at a time and now regular. oh, hair is falling out at a normal rate again too

Terry thanks again for the bracelet... I felt like i really had my sister violets with me today

hello all - interview went well, and I so want this job, it is perfect for a non construction job. I did 2 phone and 1 personal interviews and feel that i have a shot, Planning on starting work in 3 weeks, but on the other hand, not counting my chickens, because it is so depressing when I feel that things go so well and then i get the call or letter... thank you but f' off, we don't want you. So I'll know next Wed or Thurs but so want this. Pam - yes I don't know how I do it either sometimes, I never got much sleep but now that I'm working a physical job, I need more than I'm getting. You gals are all so busy today... Michelle - I hate that thing too, and i'm right there with Pam - It killed myknees so i just don't want to get back on it. Water aerobics here I come! I think I'm going to take a little nap, I don't have to go to work tonight but am so very tired... be back soon!

Tracy - Good morning. Yes, I'm here after 4 1/2 hrs sleep i'm here. LOL I use to be able to function on so little sleep, but I also didn't have a job that was actual hard work. I get a workout every day there! I'm so glad I'm off tonight. Good luck at the eye dr. you will be in my thoughts.

(most) MEN SUCK!!!!!!! Morning Violets. I feel like I never sleep anymore and am always running. I am up and showered and working on getting ready for my interview. Keep them all crossed. For an office job it would be perfect and pays $15/hr - huge improvement. Of course - no outift is comeplete without my WWJD bracelet. Terry - I am going to get my camera back today I'll get some pics tonight, in my interview outfit. my levi's (which i don't have a before but I can tell you that they fit just like Tracy's last month jean photo. blah blah blah, i'll be here for another hour or so - then off on my adventure

Terry = I'm so sorry, wish I could give you a great big hug. You are strong - one thing at a time. that is the only way I make it through the day Laura - he is on long term disability and has his military retirement. He retired 3 months ago from the accident he had 22 years in so full retirement. Well you are all amazing, i'm off to bed so I can get up and get a job tomorrow!!!!!

holy shit Tracy!!!! I thought they looked amazing but just saw the second post with the month difference.. YOU GO GIRL I am just quickly checking in have 30 mins to shower and get to work. I just bought a new outfit for myinterview tomorrow. 16 pants - the have a little give but not stretchy and a Lg blouse. I am so happy about that. I did squeeze into the 14 but they looked like crapola - and since i'm wearing them tomorrow I needed them to fit. Anyway... looks like a good day...everyone is doing good at a quick glance, except i got tat Terry was cranky. LOL Oh no response on the support.... guess that means I won't be getting my $1000 this month... I'm going to freak when it really hits

Well, i just got a good morning email from dbf - works better that way, i'm not usually awake at this hour. I replied and asked him about my money. pray for me, i don't have the energy for an arguement today.

Denise - I get support but because dbf is out of work it is so screwed up. Right now I'm $1500 in the hole and because i'm only making $10/hr I really depend on it to live. He has not taken me back to court to reduce it but he is on long term disability from his motorcycle accident. I have to deal with it today and it makes me sick. anyway - off to get dd on the bus. first day of school then going to make it over to water aerobics

Hi violets just getting in from work and checking in. Laura - with your skewers (sp) marinate your veggies/meat in your balsamic dressing with a touch of evoo. Add a little extra garlic if you would like? let them soak over night. I've done that before with regular italian dressing. So- I had a mini phone interview Last thursday and got a call today to go in for a "second" interview. The pay is around $30k/year, which is still a huge pay cut from where I was but so much more than I'm making now. you know the drill... cross it all! Well - i'm going to bed, have to get up at 6:30 dd starts school tomorrow and has to be out for the bus at 7am! YUCK. Good thing is I'll be hitting the gym for 9am water aerobics class As for restriction. I still have a lot. I don't know if stress is helping but I can't eat much. I did 2 shakes and a bowl of lettuce and tuna for dinner. The only problem is I know I can eat, so I wanted a few wings at work tonight. I am not going to cave! I will do this for the week and get my shit together have a great night all!

Tracy man - some things are different, but some of my life is almost identical to yours. The court thing is insane, I had a "clerical error" for almost 2 years every time I went. I tried to hire an atty to go after the County for mailing out my name, address and SS # to some random guy for privacy violation but I was told "you can't fight city hall" So now that I'm $2500 in arrears which is almost 2 months... they will do nothing until he is 5-6 months behind. INSANE. - so I feel your pain. everyone tells me to go back, but I don't know if I have the strength yet to fight that fight again. It will be another 2 year war... Plus in 2 years his other ds he pays support for will be 21 so more for me... I'll deal with it then. well off to work... not really thrilled about that.

Laura - forget it... cataccori is sauce Beans? bbq??? try looking for pork and sub with chicken. LOL I thought I was picky. you win

LOL - dark meat is not as good for you but is moist and still full of Protein. actually shreds better too. I was just looking through my cook book I love and use all the time. Here is what i came up with.... chicken - mexican type stuff, enchalida's and tortia Soup. Chicken caticcori - made with dark meat falls off the bone... and a good place to check out shredded chicken recipes would be for pork. I know you said no pork but to replace with shredded chicken would be good.. like BBQ, pork & Beans except with chicken. They are all crock pot recipes so siimple and easy. Let me know if any things would work and i'll type them up for anyone who would like them

OMG laura - you crack me up. what about whole chicken/turkey with the dark meat? to me, it is kind of funny that you nuke chicken. to me that is disgusting LOL .... has to be nice and juicy

Terry- I'm glad you are pleased. you are in my thoughts and prayers. just got back from getting my hair cut. I have bangs and layers. I was going to color my hair today but I don't want to do it over, it looks nice right now. so I was suppose to get my child support today and it would have paid all my bills for the month with exception of my mtg, which come out on the 15th... and guess what... didn't get it... i'm slightly stressed and don't want to have to deal with that right now. $2500 in the hole, one month i get it the next i don't. no reasoning behind it which makes it worse. ughhhhhhhhhhh

nope, no hangover - i'm sure because i passed out and slept til 8. Since there is no smoking in the bars in NY - I find that I am not as hungover in the morning. I think the smoke killed me. Laura - I love chicken - I usually soak it in something, italian dressing, olive oil, lemon juice, garlic, salt & pepper and throw them on the real gril or the george forman grill inside. Actually that is what we did last night with homemade mashed potatoes & sauted zuccini. I got this great chicken rub at the local grocery store in the spice section. it kept my chicken nice and moist and great flavor. would be good for baking because it keeps it moist. I - personally would love some shrimp or scallops - that sounds good. Maybe that is what i'll do for dinner on Monday night - that is my next night off.

Oh did i mention that i'm doing protein shake again this week? I need to get motivated and start eating healthy again.

TracyKS - nice to see you are back. I'm sorry, why are we dealing with crazy men lately? I am so tired I can't see straight. I'm going to get a cup of coffee and then go get my hair cut. then i'm going to try again to take a nap before I go to work.