Matt Z

You are going to have to sit him down and have a very open, more than likely uncomfortable, conversation about what gets him going. I'd hate to advise going through another major surgery to "save a marriage" and then not have it work. The fact that you are willing to do that for him is pretty amazing.

That's pretty much everyone here. Check out the search option, because questions get asked over and over again all the time... but anyone here will be more than candid in their answer to any of your questions.

Overall, I'm happy. Was that always the case, nope. I was banded back in 2011. I went with the band because I was afraid of the permanence of the bypass (the sleeve wasn't an option at this time for whatever reason, but I guess that's a good thing since it would have really sucked with the acid reflux) I lost 70 lbs or so, gained and lost floating around 300-310 for years. I got stuck on stuff often, and healthy stuff, hurt to eat. Leafy greens were physically painful. I felt like a failure, I wasn't happy, I was quite depressed, no matter what I did, nothing worked. I stopped checking in with my surgeon, for years. I finally dragged myself back to my surgeon to talk about my options... I confessed to being a failure and requested help. I was shocked to find out that, my situation was pretty common, that the band was over-hyped and under-performed on the whole. We discussed options and we decided to go with the bypass. 8 months or so later, after jumping through tons of insurance hoops I had my revision surgery on the 21st of March, 2018. The lapband was 100% encapsulated in scar tissue and took the team over 3 times longer to remove than it should have, very glad to have that thing out of me. Today, I hit 239.9. I haven't been this low in well over a decade. I just wish I had done the bypass first, instead of letting fear sway me from the better choice.

This doesn't make my "try to get 128oz of water a day" recommendation seem all that high now LOL

Best thing to do... find something to occupy your time with, to distract you from the doubt/regret. Everyone heals at different rates, but just remember that everyone heals. The pain and issues you are feeling right now *WILL* go away. Yes it's tough, but it's very much worth it. Stay strong!

Yes, the same volume of muscle and fat do weigh different amounts. And yes, initially you'll "gain weight" as you build muscle, and the fluid you retain while building muscle. However, larger muscle mass requires more energy minute to minute (even while not being used) than smaller muscle mass. So in the long run, that larger muscle is going to burn more fat faster than smaller muscles. So Don't worry about the short term, focus on the long term.

I'm right there with you! From about 1.5 to 2 months until around 3.5 months (a little bit still but it's mostly gone) My hips were KILLING me.. like the outside area of the hip joint region. My back just started out of nowhere a few weeks back, more 1 side than the other. Lots of muscle, joint and tendon changes happening as we lose weight, lots of folks don't realize that fat isn't just below the skin, it's around all our muscles, tendons, bones, ligaments, etc as protection and a buffer. So as we lose this visceral fat, things shift around more, that's one of the reasons why working out is important, because it tightens up those lose connections that are pressing on nerves causing the pain.

Try changing the temp of the water or adding some calorie free flavoring. There are lot of people that have water texture and temp issues post weight loss surgery. Find the temp / flavor that they can keep down and stick to that for a bit. There are also water thickeners that you can buy from any pharmacy to add to the liquids to see if maybe thickening them up slightly helps out. That's a crappy situation and I hope it gets better soon!

Not sure which surgery you are getting, but going back to class 1 week after surgery *MIGHT* be a little much, but not "undoable"... as far as help, I didn't need much at all. There have been a handful of threads like this, most folks state they didn't need much help after returning home.

US passports takes 6 to 8 weeks to get. Once you have it, you can use it as you wish.

Good Luck! I'm surprised to see new lapbands being installed with how *EVERYONE* is moving away from them!

Well, I'm not sure what your profession is, but when my surgeon has labs drawn and then tells me that the levels she is seeing show that the patches are working... I'm going to take her word for it. Not trying to be argumentative, but... I'll take the professionals word for it.

If you are already approved for solid foods, is there anywhere you can order from that can bring you a bottle of water and a grilled chicken salad maybe? (I realize this might be a little late at this point) Also, any of the "Diet" drinks when de-carbonated would be a better choice than any of the standard sodas.

Some unflavored protein in that margarita might help out LOL

Congrats on your surgery! It always amazes me reading stories like this, you'd figure the nursing staff would know better.

What surgery did you end up with? Otherwise, don't worry, it all does get better! I know I had a week or so where I wasn't sure if what I did was the right choice. But, now... I couldn't be happier with the process.

When your BMI is well below "normal" that's when it's too much. Just remember, the lower you start, the less you will lose overall. WLS is about potential percentages and not specific amounts. https://www.obesitycoverage.com/weight-loss-surgeries/gastric-bypass/how-much-can-i-expect-to-lose Looks like the average losses for a female of your height and weight are: 80% of people will hit 165lbs 50% will hit 150lbs 20% will hit 135lbs. So, can you get to 120, sure. Is it common, not really. (based on "averages")

This mirrors my experience with the band pretty closely. Had the band installed in 2011, I did lose 70lbs or so, but that was it, the gain/loss fight started. I didn't have any major issues with the band, but I did get stuck far too often, and things that shouldn't hurt, like leafy greens, did. Revised to the Bypass this past march and I couldn't be happier.

This is why I am doing my own clinical trial with my surgeon and medical team. And going on 5 months of using these now, and the ONLY lab that came in low was Vitamin D, but living in the North East... that's expected. So, all the oddities and weirdness aside, these *are* working.

I've been using the patches and my blood work has come back good. I know folks look down on the patches because there is a glaring lack of clinical studies... but I was lucky enough to talk my surgeon into allowing me to test them out. And I'm please to say that, for me anyway, they work great. No need to swallow anything. I put 3 different patches on in the morning, leave them on for at least 8 hours... and that's it.

Some scales can be very picky to movements. I know my FitBit Aria doesn't like to be moved at all, and when I do, I have to take 5 measurements in a row so it can calibrate. Some scales don't handle higher weights as well as low. And I'm going to get some flak for this, but I'm very found of having body fat % measurements as well, yes I know they aren't 100% accurate, but neither is weight. But by having the fat measurements, even just for trend tracking, have been very helpful when dealing with stalls. I've gained weight and lost body fat so many times at this point that without knowing I'm dropping body fat, I would have lost my mind with the gains.

They brought you 2 oz of food on your first day out? LOL that's amusing. My first day with puree/mushies they brought me like 6 oz of cream of wheat, 8 oz of coffee, 8 oz of juice and a protein shake. I was like, this is a bit much don't you think? I use baby spoons at home too, really helps with pacing and portion control.

I still don't feel "Full" like ever. I do get to a point where I'm just done. It's an odd sensation really, nothing physical exactly... but when I'm done... I'm just done. Not 100% sure why that is, could be the band to bypass revision, not sure. But it's amazing how much everyone differs with their sensations.

This is exactly why I waited longer to return to work... because I wanted time to figure foods out after I was cleared to eat them. I still don't test the waters while I'm out... That said, I've had no issues eating out at this point. Find out what you can tolerate now, that way you know when you end up out and about.

Might want to taste test that sugar free koolaid first before adding anything to it. Just to be safe.