LindaS

Newat52, your reply really resonated with me yesterday and I put all of my energy into resetting my mindset (and doing my hair/makep/etc. - tried to look and feel my best when I walked through the door). I had a smile on my face and I kept my son by my side the entire time (he's 18 and very funny, I asked him to not leave me alone with her so she couldn't slide in any comments that others can't hear like she typically does).
Anyway, she seemed pretty confused about half an hour in. We were there for two hours, and she said, wow, you seem so more confident and relaxed in your own skin! I haven't seen you look this good in years! Every time she said something nice I went out of my way to respond warmly and genuinely. I never once gave her an inch to say or do anything "off" and I actually realized I was enjoying myself! GASP!!! I was laughing and joking and when we got home, my husband to,d me that was one of the best visits we've had in years!!!!
And his mom pulled him aside and told him that this surgery was the best decision I/we've made and she's so happy to see the old me shinig through... So I must say your advice was EXACTLY what I needed to hear to get me to focus on the positive and not the negative.
And I also realized that maybe I have been overly sensitive and prickly, always waiting for the "attack" and being on defense mode instead of relaxing and trying to just be myself.
So while we may not have the best of relationships, at least I know we can spend time together without conflict if I just get my head right and not give her an opportunity or reason to criticize me or our relationship.
I think this was my first NSV!
Thanks again for the great advice and I hope you have a terrific day!
All my best,
Blue

Oh man, I WISH I looked 21 again! To look like my 21 yr old self (withOUT the 80's hair!) and know what I know now? PRICELESS!!

I have severe degenerative arthritis in my ankle, and I qualify for ankle-replacement surgery. Trying to avoid this is one of the reasons I had WLS.
Before WLS, I was taking at least 1 NSAID a day (naproxen 500mg), and my ankle tended to swell almost daily.
For several months after WLS, I didn't have any problems with my ankle even when I exercised a lot.
After about a year, my ankle would swell up when I really over did it with the exercise. It doesn't happen often anymore, but it still happens.
Now, I try to do preventative care. If I know I will be doing something that will put a lot of strain on my ankle, I take a Naproxen first. I don't have to take one daily, but I will take one several times a month.
Earlier this summer, it was acting up (I was doing bootcamp 2x a week). I had a cortisone shot, which helped.
Yes, Naproxen is an NSAID. My surgeon doesn't have a problem with me taking it. My risk, he said, isn't any higher than it was before my surgery especially since I don't take them daily.
I haven't avoided ankle-replacement surgery, but it has helped push off into my future more.
My ankle surgeon also said that although exercise and lots of walking puts a strain on my ankle, the health benefits are worth more than the damage it does to my ankle.

I like Muscle Milk. There is a 14 ounce version that has 20 or 25 grams of Protein (depends on flavor). It has about 220 calories.
A good rule of thumb is if you are getting 15 grams of Protein, it should have 150 or less calories. If it has 20 grams, it should be 200 calories or less, etc.

I like Muscle Milk. There is a 14 ounce version that has 20 or 25 grams of Protein (depends on flavor). It has about 220 calories.
A good rule of thumb is if you are getting 15 grams of Protein, it should have 150 or less calories. If it has 20 grams, it should be 200 calories or less, etc.

I understand that you feel like you were undermining yourself, and you sound like you are on the right track. I'm glad you plan on discussing this with your therapist.
But, you need to put things into perspective as well. You had a 2,000 calorie day, which most people would consider being on a diet. It wasn't a week of 2,000 calorie days or a month of them. It was a day.
How did you do the next day? How do you do normally? That is what you need to worry about most.
Perspective is necessary at both ends of the spectrum. What would you have eaten in a day in the past?
Don't beat yourself up. Learn what you are doing and what you have done and measure your successes and challenges.

I had a hard time drinking Water right after surgery. It took me more than a month before I could drink more than 64 ounces in a day. It felt like such a chore trying to get all of that Water into my system.
But time passed, and it became easier. I was able to drink more at a time. I also started drinking flavored water because that made it easier to drink. Personally, I love Sobe Zero Lifewater.
Later in my journey, I found that I couldn't lose weight unless I drank at least 64 ounces of water a day. If I don't, I stall.

I took clothes to the hospital and my Kindle to read. I didn't need anything else at the hospital, and my hospital provided the belly pillow, which was awesome immediately after the operation.
Some of the things you mention, I eventually bought but I didn't need them right away.
Body pillow (for sleeping) -- no, I never used one.
Tummy pillow (for support after surgery) -- hospital provided one.
Mug warmer -- haven't used one. If my coffee gets cold, I don't want it anymore.
4oz Containers -- I eventually bought very small dishes, but I didn't need them for a while.
Appetizer spoons/forks -- No. I use regular sized silverware.
Blender bottles -- I have one, and I used it frequently at first. I rarely use it now, and I don't need more than one.
Water bottles -- I love the refillable Water bottles. I have several, but I tend to use my favorite one.
Anti-itch cream (incision sights) -- I didn't need this.
Mederma cream (scars) -- I didn't use this, and my scars look fine/faded.
Anti-bac soap -- I think I had to have this for the night before surgery.
Bento-style lunch kit -- I have one. I rarely use it.
Wet wipes -- I have these, but it has nothing to do with surgery.
GasX Strips -- No, I didn't use them, but I know a lot of people swear by them.
Liquid Tylenol -- No, I didn't use it.
Food scale -- I bought one eventually. It was when I started eating normal foods because it made it easier for me to figure out how much I was eating. I didn't need it when I was eating prepackaged stuff (protein bars and Protein shakes).
Mini plates -- I use the salad-size plate that came with my set of dishes. I didn't need to buy special ones.
Protein powders galore -- Don't invest in large containers until you know you like it.
Vitamin organizer -- No. I took a multi Vitamin, Biotin and Iron, and I just kept them in their original bottles.
Exercise bands (stretchy ones) -- I have one, but I rarely use it.
Fitbit tracker -- I have a watch that will tell me the calories I burn, but I don't have a fitbit, and I am two years out. I don't need that much information.
What I did buy eventually for working out -- an exercise ball, hand weights (2 and 5 pounds), and exercise DVDs that I can use at home. Personally, I like Zumba and Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred. My next investment will be kettle balls.
I highly recommend that you not buy a bunch of stuff initially because you don't know what you will like/want/use. It doesn't all have to be there right away.

I can't speak to your motivations but I do know that for me, in the beginning (when I wasn't telling anyone) it was because deep down I believed everything my doctors, skinny friends and The Biggest Loser told me.
Basically, that being fat was entirely due to being lazy. That if I did anything other than exercise ten hours a day and eat a special diet, I was somehow cheating. That if I would just try harder, one more time, I'd finally succeed and do it the "right way." You know, without slicing out part of a major organ.
So I didn't tell people because just having surgery felt like a failure to me. Yes, it was a big step towards never being morbidly obese again. But it felt like finally admitting diet defeat.
It didn't help that the only people I knew at that point that had surgery were bypass patients that were over 400 pounds - my 250 pounds made me feel like I was cheating the system.
Now I'll tell anyone. I don't really care what people think. I've come a long way from there. I had surgery, yes. Some people wouldn't agree with that. But I'm going to maintain my loss. And it wasn't the easy way out, no matter how many people think so.
Those people that busted their butt on The Biggest Loser while being shouted at and physically challenged to the extreme almost every day? Only a handful maintained their loss. I chose a sustainable way to live my life. I'm already a success and I'm not going to stop being one. My success wasn't dependent on a personal trainer and chef and ten hours of exercise a day.
In the end, I chose what works for me. How could I possibly be ashamed of that?
~Cheri

So classic instance of as you sow, so shall you reap. What you give, you get back.
I go in to get a shot and the nurse says she is sick, I say I've just had surgery so I am trying to not get sick, she asks me what kind of surgery and I take a deep breathe and say ...
Weight loss surgery.
She is so happy for me, congratulates me, wow this and that (and of course, perversely I wished she had said, What?! You don't need it! But noooo, I am surrounded by super-supportive people who NEVER say that!). She wants to know what kind, I say sleeve.
And then she says...you know I had it last october. I've lost 78 lbs and I have 20 more to go. Wow. She says, I don't think it's anybody's business so I don't tell a lot of people but I wanted to tell you so you could be encouraged.
She proceeds to show me her excess skin on her arms, pulls down her pants, shows me her tummy, we both agree it's not that bad, and I walked out of there with a spring in my step.
What you give to the world, is what you get back. I put myself out there, and she gave me back support, and information I needed. Life, she is good.

So if I can build on this...I am doing my best to drink 64 oz daily. I really, really am. Yesterday I almost passed out at costco because it's hot in Texas, I was outside, and I didn't drink right before I got there. By the time I realized I was thirsty, it was too late and I was a mess. Sweating, tired, dizzy, light-headed, had to go sit down like a small child, hoping I'd make it without falling down.
This morning, I was trying to drink but it was 10 am and I had only drunk 14 oz. I was rushing to get out the door to go for a meeting in Dallas. I couldn't. I had to sit down, my husband had to come help me, and I had to down a G2 in 30 mins before I felt better. So now I'm lying her in bed listening to a boring meeting when I should have been AT that boring meeting.
My blood pressure fell to 100/55 not because I am not drinking 64 oz, but because it's either not enough in the heat, or because I'm not drinking it consistently.
Like several others, I worry about newbies, the newly-sleeved, and those who are looking for advice, reading something like this and thinking it's okay to not drink the 64 oz.
Drink your Water, people! Don't be like Gamergirl, passing out and sh*t.

I had to sit on a donut cushion last week. (:
Sent from my iPad using VST

Big bad vets...yes....but not as big as before.

The problem is that you don't know if someone had repercussions or not. I teach, and I know that sometimes my students get upset with me that I don't say or do something about a particular student, but really the class has no idea what I do. For most situations, I don't discipline a student in public. Just because it isn't done in public doesn't mean it isn't done.

The problem is that you don't know if someone had repercussions or not. I teach, and I know that sometimes my students get upset with me that I don't say or do something about a particular student, but really the class has no idea what I do. For most situations, I don't discipline a student in public. Just because it isn't done in public doesn't mean it isn't done.

Protein also tends to give you bad breath. I kept a toothbrush and breath spray near me.

The problem is that you don't know if someone had repercussions or not. I teach, and I know that sometimes my students get upset with me that I don't say or do something about a particular student, but really the class has no idea what I do. For most situations, I don't discipline a student in public. Just because it isn't done in public doesn't mean it isn't done.

Well my first thought on that is remembering a girl a couple of months ago, that came out and said she thought most people here looked better on their "before" pictures...
Yeah, she's not here anymore!
But really? Yes, if we lose a bunch of weight AND pretty fast as with this surgery, there may be a "sunken" look and thinning hair. But the hair will come back and some skin will shrink back over time.
The teeth? I suppose if they were jacked up before they will still be jacked up!
This surgery does not turn us into super models.
Well except for me. I went to Mexico and paid an extra thousand for that package

I know this is a serious post, but this made me giggle. I think I am going to remember that for the future.... "actually I have lost closer to an adult sized Labrador, although I have always been a fan of elephants!"

I used to eat all of my mom's expensive diet food as Snacks when I was in high school and never realized how frustrating that must have been. Now that I'm reading your stories I'm feeling a little guilty, guess I owe her some nutritious snacks lol.

Nice. Cost is beyond my budget though. Cheaper to just take out the teen. :-)

My daughter and I go through this all the time.
Its not like I dont buy her her taquitos or spicy noodles, etc... No I come home to find my cheese, ham, pudding and fudge bars all gone! Its so frustrating.
We finally had a talk and I explained it was possible to starve me that way (she is 15).
I wasnt going to eat her Snacks and goodies so she needed to be more mindful....
Now if only it worked :-)

I cannot eat much. My stomach is the size of a Sharpie. I have to prioritize my intake. So, dammit, when I find a yummy AND nutritionally balanced AND sleeve friendly meal.... Leave my food ALONE!!!! Don't eat my leftovers. Let me enjoy it.
Why is it what I'm eating and/or rationing out is the most appetizing thing in a 50 mile radius to my family?!?!
And then I feel selfish and guilty for getting so annoyed. Like I'm being the greedy food ogre who never wanted to share?

The dots or pips are based on the number of posts you have. Here's a list of our Member Titles/Ranks:

We've been crystal clear that we do not allow topics created with the purpose to Rant and Rave about members. What exactly is so difficult to understand about this concept ? Susan isn't picking on anyone whatsoever and I'm getting a little tired with all the whining as of late
I would allow a total free for all in the R&R forum or across the entire forum for that matter....if we were an automobile forum. We happen to be a forum for people where a majority of them have been bullied, physically abused or sexually abused. I'm sorry but we're not going to help perpetuate the name calling, nastiness and hate.

You aren't doing it on your own? Who is doing it for you?