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I went to a bariatric support group meeting a few months ago. I've been determined to let go of an incident that happened but another thread just brought all my feelings to the surface again. Please forgive me for using this forum to vent. I'm a band patient who didn't get restriction right away from fills. It took over a year of working with my surgeon to get me to the right place. Needless to say, I didn't lose weight like some others have reported. At times I've been discouraged but somehow, I've managed to stay mostly optimistic and keep working at it, which is finally paying off. At the support group meeting, two women asked me when I was banded and how much weight I had lost. The way they looked me up and down with obvious disgust/disapproval made me feel like a failure and want to crawl into a hole. When I thought about it later it just made me mad. This was not my first experience with judgement and comparison. In the surgeon's waiting room I met another woman who'd had surgery around the same time as me. We talked about our weight loss and she'd lost a whole lot more than me. The smug, judgemental air that came off her really hurt. Of all the people in the world who should be supporting another heavy person I would think it would be other people who have actually walked in fat shoes. I don't understand the competition and the judgement.

Hi all, I'm new here, but have found all of your experiences and information on this discussion board very helpful as I consider this procedure. I am 29 years old and 5'2" with a BMI of 42 right now. In all honesty, I think I suffer from a delusion that I am a thin, active person, when I am actually the complete opposite. I love to cook and eat healthy and I really enjoy being active. I've run several 5ks in the past and love walking, yoga, playing softball and other team sports. But yet, here I am, still at almost 230 pounds. It's not until I see myself in photos or my clothes don't fit right that I realize how big I've become. I've struggled with my weight all my life and have been on WW, South Beach, Body for Life, Atkins, MediFast, etc. Most recently, I've been following the new Weight Watchers plan off and on since it launched in November with minimal success. I feel like I just need some help...a little something extra that will help me stick with it. I hope this is the answer. I checked into LapBand two years ago after a professional associate of mine lost 75lbs in four months and told me she had the LapBand surgery. At the time, my insurance explicitly said it did not cover the procedure and my BMI was not more than 40 (it was over 35). I don't have any complications...yet. However, my good cholesterol levels are low, and, last year, my running plans were put on hold as I nursed a heel spur (which I'm 95% sure was caused by my excess weight). I have family history of heart disease and high blood pressure. My husband also believes I might have sleep apnea. Long story short, I need to get this weight off. Not just for me, but I really want to have kids in the very near future. I want to have healthy pregnancies and be able to keep up with them as they grow. We've tried a bit already and I'm worried my weight is a factor (okay, I KNOW it is a factor). I'm registered to attend a seminar on April 15. I'm really hoping my insurance covers this procedure, as my husband and I don't have the money to pay for it out-of-pocket. Laura

Drassan, don't feel bad. We all vent here at some point or another and the good thing about it is that you are not alone. There's many of us here facing the same problems. Remember that we are here for support. I know exactly how you feel. It's been almost a year and I still have not reached the green zone. I am currently I'm starting to think the lap-band is not for me. I was banded on May 26, 2010. I have lost a total of 30-some lbs. Through out this year I've had many "stuck" episodes. They started getting worse back in November. I've been throwing up everyday almost for every meal since November. Needless to say, the very few people who know I was banded last year label me as lazy and say that I'm not trying hard enough. They don't understand how hard this process is for a lot of us. I've developed depression because of this of the disencouraging words and PB. It has got so bad that I was prescribed anti-depressants which I might add are not helping with my weight loss. I hope soon I can reach that green zone and begin losing the weight as I have seen with many who were banded last year. Just remember, people are always going to be judgemental and we can't allow these individuals to bring us down. We took that step therefore we are a step ahead. We will get there! Don't lose your motivation. If you like, we can buddy up and help each other. What do you say? Claudia

I'm defintely going to bring that up at my post op appointment... for sure!

I lost weight for 6-8 weeks after surgery, then nothing! Nothing for about 10 months while the surgeon gave me fills attempting to get my band to the right restriction. I didn't gain any weight back, which was great but I stopped losing. The last fill I received 3 weeks ago. My surgeon filled me using fluorscopy to get the fill to a safe maximum fill for me. Now I have restriction and I've started losing weight again, YAY! My point is this, everyone's journey is different. When I looked at the weight others were losing, it was easy to get discouraged, and sometimes I did, But I hung in there and worked with my surgeon. This is a process, not a race. We need to be careful when comparing ourselves to others. Good luck with your process!

You bet I had problems. So I learned not to eat it. You to will get by without it. Remember: That flour, and Water turns to glue. That Glue will forever stick to you.

It's awful to feel alone. Have you considered going to a food Addicts Anonymous meeting? There are even online meetings. Www.foodaddictsanonymous.org

why would you want a tummy tuck at 4 weeks post op. what happens when you lose all your weight it would be useless at this point.

Thanks; wouldn't call it luck though. Willpower and working my ass off? Yep.

Hello Lisa3, Here is my diet ( I start it Tomarrow ) and use every day for the next 2 weeks; * Daily food goals* A. 4 Protein drinks such as Carnation Instant Breakfast, 0 sugar carbs added, mixed with 1% milk, Glucerna or High Protein Slimfast B. 1 meal consisting of 4oz Lean protein and 2 cups Vegetables. C. 2 servings of fruit per day. Daily Fluid goals are: 64 or more ounces of calorie-free fluid every day such as Water or fruit 2O All food and fluit must be consumed. Use Fiber supplements as directed on package for constipation. AND if you desire, you may include 2 additional Snacks per day of 1/2 cup diet Gelatin and/or sugar- free popsicles. Read all your food labels on other drinks to make sure they are calorie-free FOOD SUBSITUTIONS **Insteat of 1% milk ---- 1 cup fat free Yogurt Breyer's, Yoplait, Columbo ( all light ), Dannon Light 'n **Vegetables------ 1 Tomato, 1 cup chopped vegetable mix including red and green bell peppers, cucumber, celery and onion, 1/2 cup chopped carrots, 1/2 cupsteamed broccoli,carrots or green Beans. **Fruit---- 1 apple or orange, 1/2 banana, 1/2 cup grapes, 1 cup melon, 1/2 cup canned pineapple in juice, 1 cup fresh pineapple, 1/2 cup packaged fruit in juice, or 1/2 cup uncweetened applesauce. **4 Ounces cooked protein---- chicken, Tuna packed in water,drained, fish ( grilled, baked, broiled ), Cooked turkey breast, cooked pork tenderloin, OR 3 ounces of the following Proteins, lean beef ( loin or round ) or cooked lean ham. 2 teaspoons oil and vinegar for greens or 1 tablespoon regular salad dressing or 2 tablespoons light salad dressing. I hope this helps with your confusion, My surgery is May 4th. My diet was given to me by my Surgeon, she is very good in here field and she is also a teaching Dr. at Harvard Medical School, her diet is going to make this pre-surgery diet a little better and easier to follow.GOOD LUCK and keep in touch!