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Hi, I know this is strange but im really nervous about trying softfoods in a couple of weeks.... I am on a 3 week post-op liquid diet per my physician. I have 2 weeks left and I dont know how i will deal with vomiting/sliming/chest pains and whatever else comes along with my new tummy mishaps. Yes i know i decided to have the sleeve and im not regretting my decisions but i dont want the discomfort or the ugly side of the sleeve to become a daily part of my life.... The first day i start soft foods i also return to work . I havent shared with coworkers/ family i had the surgery because i felt they honestly did not need to know and i will share if./when i choose to share. I have struggled with my weight for years and finally had the courage to do something about it but its been very painful, emotional, and extremely difficult. I know i am not the only one that has felt this way and im glad that this forum allows us to express the pain of weight issues/struggles/disappointments. I would greatly appreciate any tips, recipes, ideas on how to start soft foods also how to handle lunch at work!!! Thanks Blessings, TD

So here we are: Day one of my pre-op sugar and carb free liquid diet. I was terrified to wake up this morning for the fear that my hunger would be so bad I would fail, fail once again on my weight loss journey. But I pulled on my big girl panties got up put two feet on the ground and started my day. I began with a few drinkable yogurts, some jell-o and a coffee. A black coffee without the delicious milk and sugar but hey the caffeine is what I wanted. For dinner it will be broth but I look at this as my last fad diet, the last time I will ever see the scale go up, the last time I will fail.

Well really as the title says where do I start? Its been almost 10 months since my surgery - and I've got to say - time has flown by - and though progress has been slow... its still progress... I've also learned a lot since last March... about the band, about me and about the relationships I have.. who would have thought that getting the band could impact ALL aspects of my life? I mean yes - we've all read about how the band impacts not only our health - physical and mental -but it impacts our relationships - to food, to people, to clothes, to ourselves.. I suppose I've been naive to the whole thing.. and haven't really taken a hard look at myself (lets face it - looking at myself was NOT something I wanted to do) but hey it has to be done eventually right?! Now don't mind me if I start to ramble here.. but wait.. its my blog right? ha ha... kidding.. but seriously... See.. it was in 2008 - that I started this journey... when the Lap Band was merely a 'fantasy' for me... I was at my highest weight - 495lb... and wearing a 30-32W pants size... I knew I was fat... I had known that all my life.. being the 'big girl' was nothing new.. but this was different... I was having trouble with my health, with even doing the easiest of things... getting out of bed in the morning, or shopping? Yeah.. lets say even Lane Bryant no longer 'fit' me right.. but it was one week before my birthday in 2008 that I had the scare of my life... I hadn't been feeling well at all - but I had ignored it.. afterall I was such the 'non-compliant' patient... I was a diabetic - who didn't take the prescribed meds, nor did I check my blood sugars - and eating right? YEAH RIGHT... anywho - one morning I was in severe pain, weak, and vomiting... my neices were the ones that convinced me to go to the hospital.. and from the Emergency Room I was admitted directing into the hospital.. where I stayed for two and a half weeks... the diagnosis? Early Renal Failure... really? Me? I wasn't even 30 years old yet.. I didn't understand it.. and that's when the Doc came in and 'yelled' at me... letting me know that my kidneys were shutting down... due to uncontrolled diabetes.. he yelled at me about my weight... he yelled about me not caring about my life... This was so very far from the truth... because I did care... didn't I? After spending those two weeks in the hospital - being completely furious with my Doctor - i realized he was right - this was the first time in my life that my health kept me from work.. I realized that he was right - dialysis was a certainity if I didn't make changes... So it was then - when I was released from the hospital that I decided that I needed a change... When I walked out of that hospital - I was taking approximately 15 pills a day and 2 shots of insulin a day... I weighed 495lbs, had high blood pressure and my A1C was a 13..so my daily blood sugar on average was over 330... Flash-Forward....Its 2011 - and here I am... I am now 130lbs lighter - give or take... and still - I don't see a HUGE difference... is that wierd? but what I do notice is those 2 shots and 15 pills a day I was taking? Nope.. no more... only pill I was taking was a multi vitamin... THAT was success enough for me... but I was still considered Morbidly Obese... and there were some family issues that came up... that woke me up.. my weight was a contributing factor to increased risks for the Cancer that was affecting so many in my family... I HAD to do something more... Diabetes and high blood pressue were not the only enemies I had to fight... As 'luck' would have it - the company I work for changed insurance plans - and it was then - during a benefits meeting I realized that the Lap Band Dream - was now an option.. REALLY? So there I went... I met with Dr. Simpson for the first time in October of 2011.. after our first consultationn - it was a go - now the only issue was to get approved by insurance... and from what I heard - getting approved was to be a 'bear' to deal with... and it was.. no lie.. they wanted EVERYTHING... letters from my primary care provider, 5+ years of medical records, proof that I indeed had co-morbidities... Of course at first glance these requirements looked daunting... but in reality - it wasn't at all - for I met all those requirements - EASILY.. which in this sense.. was quite sad.... The letter my primary care provider wrote? That in itself was an eye opener... She had gone back - way back in my medical records - and found that at age 12 I was diagnosed as Obese... really?! What happened? and then she tracked from that point all those other little issues that came up.. Asthma, Chronic Lower Back Pain... and then at age 15? Diagnosed with High Blood Pressure?! and then at 23 years of age diagnosed with Diabetes? I had ignored all this... This letter had proved to be yet another eye-opener - one that reminded me that yes - I had made progress - but I could indeed become a better version of myself... a healthier version. So in less than a week after submitting all the needed information to the insurance company - that's right - I got the call.. APPROVED... So after much trial and error in scheduling - I finally had my surgery on March 20th, 2012... So now? That we're in the present day? Its been 10 months since my surgery... and since the surgery - I've lost just over 50lbs... see what I mean? SLOW going... but its going right? But somehow I feel like I should have made more progress.... Dr. Simpson always reminds me that this "is not a race, its a marathon".. REALLY? Ugh.. I have no patience... but he's right.. it took me a good while to gain the weight - so its going to take me time to lose it as well.. My struggles of late has been to realize that success can not be measured by the numbers on the scale.. (however lets be honest kids... it matters...) Shopping has been fun.. I mean for the first time in my life - I can fit into 1X and 2X tops - and the cool thing is I've finally made it into a size 20W pants... really? YAY me.. but even with all those little successes.. why am I finding myself not so happy with everything? Why am I finding myself less confident than when I was 495lbs, why am I finding that my relationships aren't as stable as I thought? Is it me or them? Who is the insecure one? Why is it that when I look in the mirror - I don't see the new me - but I see the old Bea... the 495lb one... why is it that when I shop - I still attempt to dress myself in the shrouds of clothing I was so used to... why is it that wearing clothes that actually fit... is uncomfortable and unsettling for me... and what about the changes to my body? the flabby skin? Yes.. I was well aware of the 'side effects' of the surgery - but I want my old body back somedays... at least it was full and somewhat firm... but now? this flabbiness? especially the arm flab.. baah... or lets talk a little about the undue attention I receive now.. THAT's different... however... I'm the same person I was when I was 495 lbs... why all of sudden are they paying attention now? so now - I wonder who's really interested in the me... the real me - the me inside... because somedays it seems that my appearance is all that matters to 'them'... But really ... why am I complaining? This is what I wanted right? and I have to take the good with the bad... so for now? I just take a day at a time... And I think I've caught you up... so until another day my new friends.. take care, be good to yourself and to others... and remember... "A Day Without Laughter is a Day Wasted"... Just me - Bea

The American Society for Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery has developed a chart for the treatment of bariatric patients in the ER. The download contains information for the treatment of leaks, sepsis, intra-abdominal bleeding, obstructions etc... The download comes in a PDF format so that you can download it for FREE before you go to the Emergency Room. You can download this PDF for here: http://asmbs.org/store/

3 little letters... F...A...T... FAT... Something I have carried with me my whole life, something I have been called my whole life, something I have felt my whole life... Something I am ready to let go of. I have always struggled with my weight. I was never the kid that felt confident at gatherings or at school. I was teased...badly. There have been so many times that I have cried because of my weight, whether it be due to someones cruel comments, or because it has inhibited my life. Even as an adult, I have been struggling. It is time to let go and be the person I always wanted to be... I can't wait to be the girl who stops to look in the mirror twice because I don't believe the reflection is me. To be just "one of the girls" in a photo, instead of the "fat friend". To deal with my "inner fat child" demons and live a healthy life. I am going to start my pre-op diet on the 14th. Once that day comes, there is no turning back... I pray this momentum and desire carries me through this journey... Cheers to a new me!

I'm now 6 weeks post-op and feeling great. My surgery date was November 20th, but it seems like years ago. I'm Down 30 lbs which I think is pretty much on track with what my Doc says I should be losing. I think lower BMIs tend to not lose as quick, and I'm OK with that. I'm trying not to be a slave to the bathroom scale, and I said before surgery I never would. But man it's tough to stay away from it! I said I was only going to weigh myself once a week, but I'm finding myself sneaking into the bathroom for a quick weight check. I'll do measurements again a the 2-month mark. I'm getting used to life with my new stomach, or stomach size rather. There have been a couple hiccups along the way (pun intended), but nothing that makes me regret this life-changing decision. Some of the things that I read on this website and others from my Doc are making sense to me now. My doc used to say that the sleeve is only a tool that is one of many that need to be used to achieve and maintain weight loss. I get that now; Even though I'm restricted by the amount I can eat at any one time, it's still entirely possible to make bad food choices and eat *almost* continuously throughout the day. Sure portion size is limited, but I'm hungry in about 2 hours. I use the word "hungry" here not as head hunger, but as my body really needing food. this is something new for me - and weird. But it's as if my body is getting used to using food as a source of nutrition, rather than my brain using it as a source of comfort or stress reliever. Yes, I have had head hunger twice in the past few weeks and it didn't work out very well. the problem was not in the quantity of food I ate, but the speed with which I ate it. I just can't eat fast anymore! So the feeling of overeating, I mean really overeating, is not pleasant. I'm ok for about 5 -10 minutes, but then it starts - light sweat accross the forehead, heart races a little, dizzy. I don't know exactly what dumping is, but maybe that's what happened to me. Now I have to eat very slowly in small bites and pay attention to the small signals my body gives me telling me to stop (I read this on this forum and didn't believe it). I might have the occassional burp which generally clears the way for a little more food to enter, or the occassional hiccup, but I notice a very slight tingling sensation and a VERY light sweat on the forehead. Nothing major, but similar to the very, very, first stages when you're about to be sick (vomit sick, although I never have). I need to pay attention and wait a couple minutes to continue eating. Usually it goes pretty well, but I'm eating small portions of food almost continually during the day. Yes, I've followed the Doc's plan about 98%. I've determined that I can take 4 swallows of water before I get the light sweat feeling. I've got that one down and never drink more than 4 straight gulps from my water jug. No problem. Other than that, I've had no issues at all with salad, some veggies I've tried, any type of meat as long as its moist and cut into small pieces. I did have a little cheat last week and ate a good handful of toasted plantain chips...maybe not the smartest move, but they went down fine. But I saw the Doc for a followup visit yesterday and he said to be very careful and limit carbs to 30 - 40 grams a day. He said anything over that would slow my weight loss. I didn't have my whole wheat toast with cream cheese this morning. I'm going to the gym around the corner from my apartment 4-5 times per week and walking about 40 minutes on the treadmill. I think its a good time to start exercising (sp?) because even though the gym is full with all of the "This is the Year I'm finally going to lose weight" promise makers, I feel comfortable there because most have a bit to lose. But I feel great, and even though I'm already cleared by my Doc for any physical exercise, I'm going to wait a couple more weeks before getting into some strength training. I'm on my way! More later, Joe P.S. My libido has returned full strength, yeah! (and stamina is much better too

Excited but a little exhausted at the same time!!! Had surgery on December 20th and the first week was smooth sailing. Wasnt until about 12 days post op did I realize I had not had a bowel movement. I was in an all out panic and my surgeon was too. He ended up having me take some Miralax and Colace and this morning had my firt BM since surgery.. Glad that's over with! Stepped on the scale last night and was 235.6lbs!! Not much of a loss like in the first week, but I'll take every single pound. Starting Weight: 256 Day of Surgery: 247 Day Left Surgery: 258 1 Week Post Op: 241 2 Weeks Post Op: 235 total loss thus far: 21 pounds Not bad. Won't complain. But I think in this week I will begin taking my vitamins (and boy there are a lot!) and doing some cardio at the gym. So blessed to have gone through this process with little to no complications and even more blessed that I am on my way to a healthy new me! Happy losing all!

Happy New Years! I am very excited about this new year! Especially since I'll be well on my way to a happier and skinner me! Let's see, I am 4 weeks out! WOW, ONE MONTH!! :wub: At times it seemed like I would never get a grip on this new way of eating and drinking, thinking, cooking, coping, and whatever else I can add that I thought would be normal and isn't... LOL And now that I'm at one month, I can honestly say I do feel some normality emerging. I believe that my brain has finally cought up with the proper portion that I can actually eat and that I no longer suffer from "big eye" as it is known in my family. You know, where your eyes are bigger than your stomach and you serve yourself to much food while absolutely certain that you would eat it AAAAalllll! hehe I have found that all animal protien doesn't work for me! I have to have both plant based protein, (beans and such) and animal protein to help my body. So I found that a low gi diet works well and has some good substitutions. I am very much enjoying my cucumbers again! Yes, I finally feel as though my mind, body and Minnie are all pulling together instead of in 4 different directions!! Yes, I'm still discovering that certain foods just don't go down as well as others. Yes, I can get in all my water IF I add some lemon(real lemon) without nausea!! AND the big one, YES! I can EXCERCISE!! on my elliptical for 20 min!! The protien bars and shakes are not my favorite things but I feel for now I must endure them for the protien count to get close to what it should be! I found that stringy chicken is difficult for Minnie but if I chop it up it is much better! I can not skip my anti acid pills! NO MATTER WHAT! The most amazing thing.... I have lost 30lbs!! This is the most I have ever lost with any weight loss effort!! So this is just starting to sink in that this will work!! My body is not an exception to the rule and I have invested into a fanatastic tool that WILL work with me!! That realization is worth it all and will bring the ultimate break through of reaching my goal weight! I go back to the dr in 2 weeks. I'll let you know how it goes! Reach the stars by setting goals and take it one day at a time. Blessings for the new year! Kris

This is my first blog ever and it is on my journey to a new life. A life without pain each morning, when I wake up because half of my body when numb, because of my weight. Knowing that my first thought will not be “I will need lots of caffeine today to stay awake because I had trouble sleeping from tossing and turning and having trouble rolling over, or because I was snoring so loud I woke myself up”. Dreading what I am going to wear and will it fit today or have I out grown it. Thinking to myself am I going to make a mistake at work today because I cannot focus because my clothes are too tight. These are the things that I think about before I even get out of bed in the morning. I am so tired of these thoughts. There are many more that happen throughout the day. To help me with all the issues listed and many more I have decided to get the gastric sleeve. I have been to the orientation and got all the information and went to the free consultation to find out if I qualify for the surgery, and I do. At the free consultation I received a free body analysis where I found out a lot about my body that I did not know. My extremities weights are torso (head to stomach) 67.2 pounds, right arm is 8.82 pounds, left arm 8.22 pounds, right leg 21.34 pounds and the left at 21.25 at this time I weighed in at 263.9. My BMI was 40.1. My lean muscle was at 142.6 and my body fat mass was 121.3 pounds. Since this weigh in on 11/12/12, I have gained much more. I currently weight on my scale at home (which is always 5 pounds less than the Doctors office) said 275.6 pounds I have gained 11 pounds since then. I believe it is because I quit smoking and snack more at night, and have not tried a new yo-yo style diet. I am waiting for the surgery. Figure I better enjoy it now because soon I will not be able to. Today was different I did not want to enjoy eating large amounts of food. I wanted the weight loss to start. I only have a few clothes that fit me that I feel comfortable in to go to work that I am feeling depressed. I recently thought it was because of the holiday season, but it was not. It was me tired of being tired of being FAT. I am ready to get this weight off and I need all the help I can get. If that means major surgery; than that is the extreme in need to do. I am making the call on Monday December 31, to schedule my consultation with the surgeon to get it started. I am afraid of all the things that can go wrong, but I want a longer more for filling life than the one I have know. I am getting tired and could go on and on about how I feel. I am in hopes that I will keep the blog up and I am wanting to do one on youtube so that my family can see me and my weight loss, and maybe help them and others like me that struggle daily with food. Tata for now.

July 30th....the day of my new me...... Well allow me to share a little insight..... Well I'v done it....I have walk the desert (as my mason friends would say)....Let me tell you it was a journey that no matter how I prepared...I was not prepared for. I stayed away from the boards purposely, because I did not want to frighten or speak negatively on the surgery. It was very difficult initially because of the medical problems I had to endure (one of which, is being unable to take pain medication). Had I gotten online initially I would have screamed the horrors of this God Forsaken surgery and who....with any intelligence at all would succumb to this beast called the SLEEVE!!!! But now 45 days away from the faithful day called "surgery" I am happy, I am smiling, I am learning, and creating new ways for myself....I have not been so happy....yes I have stalled, and yes I have slimed, yes I have had the lump in my chest that seems to want to explode...I have passed the rabbit pellets, and I have had many a day of laugher on how my body has responded to what is happening to it.....BUT... I am so glad to have made this decision. Each day is a step into sunshine, sometimes with a few clouds....but even those clouds are beautiful now...and I will peer into them and make shapes out of those puffy marshmellows, instead of endulging in the doldrumsss......The feeling of achieving a goal and starting a new one is so amazing to me at this age....(okay not that I'm old) but sometimes we forget that the new wonders surrounding us on a daily basis. I have slipped into some old jeans (yep some sergio's that is no longer any where near style but)....WHAT A THRILL.... Who would have thought....the diva in me would escape again.....im loving it ...my children are loving it ....and my love is totally estactic....I have always smiled brightly ...but right now my smile can equate to a solar flare....just 45 pounds....what the hell is gonna happen when I hit 60, never mind whats gonna happen when i finally slip under 200.....watch out now......world get ready.....Im here to take over.... My growth has been in the worst times....when those scars would not heal....when the thought of one more bite of mash potatoes or apple sauce would turn me into a ingnorant maniac....but all of the sudden I remember the feeling of going through the hell called basic training....or the hell called breast cancer .....shoot even the hell of raising two teenagers who knew everything in the world and thought I belonged in a (well never mind I divest)...Each and everyone of those journeys has brought more pride and and feeling of empowerment to my journey.....well guess what ....I'M BACKCKKK....and this new road or shall I say adventure... will will bring me out of it like a shine piece of steel put through the fire and well tested....I say...bring life on...I am so readyyyyyy!!!!