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carol1951's Journal

A blog by carol1951 in General

  • Entries

    120

  • Comments

    152

  • Views

    11,169

About this blog

carol1951's Journal, a weight loss surgery blog by carol1951 on BariatricPal. 120 entries on surgery, recovery and progress.

Entries in this blog

Just another day

I so sad today. I have to ask my daughter for the car she is driving. She got it three years ago and said she would pay for it. She hasn't made a payment yet. I just can't pay for it anymore. I don't know why she doesn't at least give me some money. I could work with that. I told her to at least give me some money weekly. I know she has 4 kids and husband that can't or won't work. I know without the car she can't get to work. I told her that the house payment and the car payment are the 1st thin

Back from the Doctor

Just got back from the doctor. I lost only 3.2 lbs, for a for a total fo 30.6 lbs. I can have only clear liquids today and full liquids tomorrow. I seem only to lose on those two days of the month. I'm going to change what I eat. I'm going to try more protien. I don't really like protien, but will try to eat more.   I'm really discourged, but I really need to accept some to the blame for not losing more. I eat way to many carb and not the correct kind of carbs. I love fruit and veggi

was a quiet day

Today was been a quiet day for me. I did some house cleaning. I have felt a little more restriction today than most days. Maybe it the weather, I don't know how to explain was some days we feel restricted and some days we have know restriction. I just can't eat bread it just doesn't want to go down very good.   Well I still haven't heard from my DH today. He call yesterday evening and I could hardly talk with him I'm mad and hurt that he hadn't called on Sunday nite or Monday nite. I kno

What have I done

What in the world is wrong with me. I went to the grocery store this morning and got all the wrong things. I got a piece of pie, ice cream, muffins and a candy bar. Why do I do this??? I know better then this. I really thing sometimes I a crazy as a loon. I did eat a muffin, but thank God it didn't go down well, won't eating any more of those. On the other had the pie went down way to easy, I only ate the filling could of care less about the crust. By the way it was coconut cream my farovit

Home alone again

My DH just left for his big week long camping out with his highschool buddies. I know he couldn't hardly wait to go, he tries to play it down, but I know he can't wait to get there. I just wish he would get tired of them. They have been doing this for 30+ years. I think this is the first year one of the guys is only going to be there one evening. Maybe the rest will get tire of acting like kids and grow up. I know he has fun, but after 30 years it about time to give it up.   I'm alone i

Glad this holiday is over

I just don't like holidays anymore, I use to love the 4th, but now it just reminds me how everything has changed. I would love to have all my kids over, but my DH is still mad at of middle daughter. If I can't have all of them then, I will not have any of them here. I will not leave her and her children out. Sometimes I just want to clobber my DH.   My DH did barbeque yesterday and it was wonderful as usually. He can fix anything and it will be great. The boston butt was so tender and ju

WHY, WHY, WHY

WHY do I want to eat anything in sight somedays and I have no hunger the other day. I don't understand why I do this. Why can't all days be the same it would be so much easier to lose weight.   Today so far isn't so bad, yesterday I wanted eat everything in sight. I was at the store today, I walked by the cookies and didn't buy any. I really, really wanted to, but I know that I would eat them and that won't help the cause at all. I have to have these small victories, it helps with the s

sunshine today

Monday, July 2, 2007. Looks like we will have some sunshine today:whoo::whoo:. I'm so tired of all the clouds and rain we have been having. I worked out in the yard for about an hour yesterday. I need to go walk or do something for excersize today, besides laundry. I did pretty good this weekend. It really helps not having anything in the house to eat. I did have some problems with my pizza Friday nite. I know better than to try the crust. I usaully only eat the toppings only, but since we

lot going on this weekend

I trying to get stuff ready for a garage sale at Dana's tomorrow. I have stuff in the van, but DH won't be home till late, so can't get stuff for the truck till later.   I weight again this am down to 268.2 this morning. Here goes the yo-yo between to numbers. I did do better yesterday with my drinking. Of course that included a protien shake that I had for lunch. I still am able to eat a lot. I worry that I have stretched out my pouch. I'm eating around 2-3 cups of food at a time. I do

I'm I just nuts

I really want this to work, but I seem not to work at it. I just want the weight to fall off and I not have to do anything. I know thats nuts, but thats the way I feel. I didn't have to do any work to get here, why do I have to work to get rid of it. Crazy isn't it to think like that, but this morning thats the way I feel. Why is there days where you do great and then day when I could care less what I eat.   I weight this am and I back up again. I weighted 270.2 ths morning. I seem to

Long Night

Took a nap yesterday, should have known better. I can't sleep tonight. Sometimes I feel as if I have the RLS that you see on TV. I just couldn't lay still tonight. So here I am sitting up eating all the wrong things. Good thing there is not much in the house. I thought about buying cookie when I was at the store on Friday, but I didn't knowing I would probably have a night just like this. I can't have cookies around. I love COOKIES. So I have eaten some cheese cubes and a twinkie. The t

Eating

I heard a man on the View today talking about weight loss drugs. The interesting thing was he said was that overweight people tend not to eat breakfast or lunch, then eat to much in the evening. He could have been talking about me. I really don't like breakfast although I try to eat breakfast everyday. Some day I'm just not hungry in the morning and somedays its 10 or 11 before I'm hungry. I really need to start eating early, but I'm alway afraid that if I eat to early I will be hungry later

maybe some restriction now

I'm feeling like I have some restriction now. Still having problems with my b/p. It seems like it goes down after I eat. I know when its to low I have some little black spots showup in my vision and sometimes I feel weak and dizzy. Everytime I'm at the doctor its just fine, but of course I haven't just eaten. Now this morning its 80/44 and I haven't eaten. I think I need to get a new b/p machine, but if its not reading me correctly, then what is my DH b/p. His is alway normal right after

Really disappointed in weight loss

Just got back from my 3rd fill. I'm now at 2cc in my 4cc band. I hope I get some restriction now. I only lost 4.2 lbs,:angry for a grand total of 28 lbs. :angryI really wanted to lose 10 lbs a month, but only 4.2 lbs. I have started to walk need to increase that, I have to watch my fat intake, nothing that has more than 30% fat in it. Eat my protien 1st and drink more water, more water and more water. I know I'm not eating nearly as much as I use to eat, when is the scales going to start

Not the easy to be thin

THIS IS THE HARDEST THING I HAVE EVERYDONE IN MY LIFE!!!!!!!!   Don't every let anyone think that this is the easy way to go. This is hard!! All the bad things go done so easy and all the good thing take time to chew and go down. This is a tool that need constant attention. You can't let you guard down for a minute. I know I'm not eating nearly what I did before the band, but those old habits just want to keep coming back.   I have trouble in the mornings, I'm just not hungry. So I h

not feeling great today

It started last nite, this terrible burning in my stomach. I have been off my priolsec for a week. I went out this morning and got me some more. I hope that is the only reason my stomach is upset. I haven't ate much today 1 banana, a slice of pizza with chichen on it, and fruit smoothie. I need to get some protien in just not really feeling like eating. Oh well hope tomorrow is better. Three of my older grandkids wanted to come over and spend the afternoon with me. I really enjoyed having them,

Sunday, 6-10-07

DH is gone till Wednesday nite, I'm alone with all my food thoughts, Oh my what will I do.:help: I'm going to go to the movies with a friend this afternoon. Tomorrow I will watch my grandson for awhile and take a walk I hope. Tuesday my sister wants me to come up and see a couple of our cousins. Then its Wed. and my DH will be home in the evening. I never get a chance to be bored or alone very often, always something going on.   I weight this morning and was done a couple of pounds hope it

back from doctor

Went to see my regular doctor today. I last saw him about 2 weeks be for my banding. I had lost 26 lbs according to their scales. Guess that now to bad, but I wish it was just a little higher. I would like to lose 10lbs per month. I'm losing approx. 1-2 lbs a week. I know that is what they want you to lose, but I want it to come off just a little faster than that. I really haven't lost since I had my last fill 2 weeks ago. I seem to lose only when I'm on the liquid part of the diet. I will

Exercise today

Here it is 9:17 and I have already walked with my daughter. I walked about 3/4 of a mile today. My knees and hip hurt less today, so maybe I'm getting use to the walking. My goal for this month is to increase my daily excercise from nothing to something. I have walked 4 out of the last seven days. That is really great for me, now I just have to keep it up. Now that excercise is coming on board I have to get my calorie intact down. I have some restriction but not very much. I don't eat as m

This adventure I'm on

This is an adventure that I'm on right now, take so much of my time and energy. I'm living breathing it every minute of every day. I'm trying so hard to do this and the weight is so slow coming off. I know it took year to put on, but I what it off NOW!!   I walked today with my daughter maybe a 1/2 mile and I hope it helps. I'm trying to do more each day. I have been using some band to work on my arm that swing in the air everyday.   One of my biggest problem, I believe, is that I can't e

great day 6-2-07

It is a beautiful day. Not to hot and not to windy and not to cold, perfect day so far.   I was sitting here when my dh was eating chips out of the bag when it dawned on me that I will never do that again. I really do think most of the time about what I'm going to eat and how much I'm going to eat. NO MORE MINDLESS EATING FOR ME!!!!! Maybe I'm being to learn what I should have learned long long ago.   I have a long way to go on this journey, but I'm willing to do it forever. I started t

thursday, 5-31-07

Well it been two weeks since my last fill and have very little restriction. I guess I should call the doctors office and see if I can get another fill and not wait another two weeks. I can get at least 2 cups at a sitting. I'm not eating as much as I was before my band, but not anywhere close to 4 oz's the doctor talked about. I'm going to challenge myself to excersise this month. I will start slow and add some time to it each week. Dana wants me to do the walking program at zona rosa that is

sunshine saturday, not

Its a little gloomy today, with rain shines off and on. I went to my stamp club today and had a good time. Dessert which I made was good, I ate a small orange brownie and left some with my daughter and sent some with the stamp lady. My husband has yet to try them. They were very good. I love stamp and scrapbooking and need to do more of it. It would keep my mind busy and my hands busy. For some reason I just don't do it. I have lots of pictures to work on and lots of material to use up.

lonely

I'm feeling very alone today. Why don't I make the correct choices. I know exactly what I should do, but then turn around and do the wrong thing. Is it just human nature or I'm I just try to defeat myself. I had my second fill the other day and I'm eating today, but I want to eat all the wrong thing today. I want to eat pizza, I know that some say that we don't just eat to be eating. I love food. I love pizza, it has nothing to do with feeling bad, or hating myself. I know sometimes it is

5-22-07

I was watching tv this afternoon, when I realized that the first time anyone told me I was over weight was when I was in high school. My girl friend told me that I should lose a couple of pounds, up until then I had never given my weight a thought. Wish she had kept her mought shut. That was the start of my yoyo diet. I never really have had a good weight lost except when I did the (liquid diet) and that was almost 20 years ago now. I did get down to 170 maybe, can't really remember, I do rememb

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