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Don't waste the pretty

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Ya learn something new every day

Since my last journal entry I have been feeling a bit more hungry and have actually put on some weight. I went back to my doctor today for a fill worried I had a leak or I had streatched my pouch. My doctor told me, to my great releif, that as I loose weight the band needs to be tighted slightly to keep up the same level of restriction. In the same way my rings are looser since losing wight my lap band is also looser and needs adjusting to remain effective.... the things you learn!! She also said that a couple of drinks a day is perfectly fine, just consider it a snack to allow for the KJ's. Good news all round!!
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Where did the restriction go??

I'm feeling a bit defeated and depressed about the short lived results of my first fill. I have been putting on weight lately because I have a pre band appetite all the time. When I started this adventure I was hopefull that the band would give me the restricion I needed pretty much from the get-go. That's not the case, but is it me? or is this yet another thing I have failed to get right. I know that sounds terribly negative but it's hard not to blame yourself. The whole reson I get this band was to force me to do what I havn't been able to do unassisted. I've just started a new thread asking other memebrs for their early banding & fill experience.   Today I ate   Medication Metamucil coffee 3 shortcut bacon 1 egg 4 rice thins with peanut butter banana Piece of birthday cake Lean roast lamb 1 small potato pumpkin zuccini Water
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Two steps forward - one back

Its been a long time since my last entry so we have a lot of catching up to do. After my last fill nothing really happened except work became a lot quiter and I had a shitfight with a dickhead at work. So I ate. We then went on holiday.... so I ate some more. I went back up to 104 before my next fill which was last week. Needless to say the doctor was disapointed but I told her that I could easily eat a 3 course meal. She gave me another .6ml bringing me to 3.1 ml and asked me to drink some water. I drank it without any trouble at all and she said that it is unusal for someone with as much fill as I now have. She concluded that I must have a small stomoch (you wouldn't know it) and/or my stomach wall is thinner than the average resulting in the band not giving me the expected restriction. The solution was to be a bit more agressive with the fills. I have to go back in 2 weeks for a another go.   Since the fill I have noticed quite a bit more restriction. The first couple of meals after the fill I had to bring some food up. The message is clearly that I need to slow down. I now think I know why people say they can no longer eat certain food like bread. Up until this week I have not had trouble with any food really.   Anyway, the day after the fill I had a god almightly migrane and ended up in hospital. I didnt realise that the band would virtually stop me from vomiting. It was very stressful not being able to bring anything up. For the next two days I felt sick and even more restricted which I guess was from the swelling from the vomiting.   I have just taken some measurments: Weight 100.9kg bust: 112cm waist: 105cm Hip: 129
Fleur

Fleur

2
 

TOO TIGHT!!

Had a bit of drama with my band today. I had been feeling an easing of restriction having lost more weight so last week I took myself off for a bit more fill. Only got 1/4ml extra. Things seemed OK for a few days - nice restriction - then disaster struck. I couldnt really eat anything with out pain. Even water would just sit there for a while. It was worse when I was sitting down. That wasn't the worse part. The worse part was not being able to sleep for the reflux. Even propped up in bed I'd get no more than 10 mins shut eye before I'd be bringing up some mucas - all night long. Today I went back to have 1/2 mill out and have spent the rest of the day in bed - sleeping thankfully. I feel a bit battered and bruised but as they say there is always a silver lining. I lost another KG - Now I've lost 21 kg with 17 to go.   Thought I'd also like to measure myself: NOW(CM's) Change from last Total CM's lost Waist 90cm -2cm 12cm Hip 121.5 same 17.5cm Bust 102.5 -2.5cm 16cm
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Speeding Ticket

I've got an idea, maybe they should give out speeding tickets for eating. That might help me slow down. I am really struggling with eating only half a cup over 20 minutes. Today I used a timer and I got to about 15 minutes. Now I need to try and stretch it to 20.   Today I ate   Optifast with banana drink coffee avocado & egg mash - 10 min roast vegies, egg, chick pea mix - 15 min left over rissoto - 10 min Lots of water   Today I received an email from Michelle, another Brisbane girl banded by Blair last week. I look forward to meeting her.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Slow Down

Yesterday I went to see my Doc. for the 2 weeks post op visit. He's really happy with everything but wouldn't fill me just yet. I have to wait another 10 days. I then went to see my dietician who gave me to low down on the puree stage. Everything is fine except she wants me to eat half a cup of puree food with protien 6 times per day over a period of 20 minutes. Also I can't drink 10 mins before and 30 mins after a meal. The drinking isn't a problem but finding protien rich mushy food and the eating half a cup over 20 minutes - well - I'm really going to have to apply myself to this one. I understand if I don't do this I may stretch my pouch and then forevermore require more food to feel full. I guess I expected the, banb to tell me when I was full even at this early stage but it seems I have to do some of the hard work myself - fair enough!!   Today I ate:   1/2 cup yoghurt sm coffee 1/2 cup mix smoked salmon, goats cheese & hoummos water coffee Banana mashed *****Chocolate***** (bugger easter) 1/2 cup puree pizza - home made with vegies and ham Metamucil
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Remember the 70's

I can't remember the last time I was in 'The 70's' but quite unexpectidly I hit 79 kilo's on the weekend. It was unexpected because I had only just got into the 80 kilo rang a week or so ago but I think I know what tipped me over. I had to go to Sydney for a couple of days and I always loose weight when I travel but also I had an odd side effect from taking pain killers. I have recently had a series of migraines and been taking Mersyndol regularly to ward them off. What this did to was make my pouch a little swollen, effectivly increasing my restriction quite a bit. I think it is under control now but I am going to the doctor in the morning for a bit of an unfill. I'm heading to the US in a week or so and I'd like a bit more freedom while on holidays. My Doc also believed that preasure in airplanes can temporarily increase restriction and in my experience this is true. Which ever way I got here I'm stoked to be in the 70's. F
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Only 3 days till banding

My God it's getting close. I just want it done now so I can start seeing results.. Since deciding to have this done I have been more honest with myself about how I look. Before, when I caught a glimps of myself in a shop window, I'd tell myself it wasn't too bad - convincing myself that I wasn't in as much trouble as I am. Now I find that I look at myself and say....'Yep, I really do need help. I've honestly tried everything and now I need this band". So I guess that's why I'm keen to get going. I see my shrink tomorrow. She's not a big fan of the lap band so it will be interesting to see what she has to say. It may be time to see a new shrink. I've made a pack with myself not to buy and clothes or shoes or spend any unnecessary money for 90 days starting on the 1st April. I want to save money becuase this operation is so expensive and I dont need any clothes especially in the size that I am now.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Normal food at last

I had a call from the dietician today after I emailed her about my struggles with the half cup over 20 min thing. Trudy (God love her) allowed me to go ahead and have some regular food and see how I go. So now I can use a small entree plate to eat meals from. I still have to try and string it out for 20 mins. I can slowly introdce toast and lavosh bread. I can now have crackers and lean meats. No more puree - yippie!!! I thought I was going mad before. To help me trudy has also sent me a beginners eating plan. My next Doctors appointment is monday and I am sweating on a fill becuase I just have far too much freedome at the moment for my own good. I wish I was one of those peoplem that feels restricted straight away but I'll have to wait for my fill.   Today I ate: 3/4 cup cereal with skim milk coffee 350g greek yoghurt small latte small plate of chicken, vegies and goats cheese coffee banana water water water small plate of pumpkin & goats cheese ravioli.
Fleur

Fleur

2
 

New York

Just got back from New York. Had a great time and the good thing was that I walked my arse off every day so I lost almost 2 kg. Bought a great pair of Sevens Jeans and they look pretty good on me - even if I do say so myself.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

More Fill Please

Had myslef another fill last week. I'm now at 4ml in a 5 ml band. Really do feel the restriction now and I'm enjoying it. I hit the big 10kg loss today which I am very excited about. Here's is an interesting thing I learnt this week - if you have a couple of glasses of wine or any alcohol before eating the restriction will be less because you are relaxed. I tried it out and it's true - bugger it!!
Fleur

Fleur

2
 

Measurments

Today it was time to do my first monthy measurments:   Bust 114cm Wast 104cm Hip 130cm   Pretty sure this is reduction on my starting measurments. Did pretty well food wise except for a bit of chocolate, but I stick to the quantities and times.   Today I ate:   Small Mango Smoothie 1/2 coffee 2 eggs, hoummus and goats cheese puree Optifast with banana Salmon risotto coffee   I picked att he kids eater eggs - all up I had about 75g
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Measurements

Took some new measurements today: Hip: 117cm - went up 1 cm - don't know how I managed that. Waist: 82cm down 4 cm -maybe fat is migrating from waist to hips. Bust: 97 - down 1cm
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Maggic Mushies

Today I ate 1 cup saltana bran with hot skim milk Skim Latte 1 cup vegetable soup scrambled eggs - 4 Glass Nudie juice Optifast with banana Refried beans, avocade mash and tablespoon finely grated cheese Coffee 2 doses metamucil medications Lots of water
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Latest Measurements

Took my measurements again today because that's what my diary told me to do. 105.5cm Bust, 93cm waist and 121.5cm hip. Since the last time I measured in mid Feb I've lost 3cm from Waist, 3cm from Bust and 1.5 from Hip. It's a bugger how the hips are the last to go and that's where I really need to move it. I must say I wans't expecting much of a loss so I'm thrilled with that. By the way I was 90.3kg this morning.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Is a breakout really all that bad?

You know that saying....'for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction'.... Well, that would be the best way to discribe my day yesterday. I was invited to a lunch for work. I really wanted to go so I could have a propper meal but also becuase there would be a lot of colleagues there I could see. Anyway, steak was served which was fine but it was the 8 or so glasses of champagne and the Maccas I had on the way home that sent me off the rails.   I remember this happening when I had been on Optifast in the past. There is only so many days I can do it before I break out - usually in a spectacular way.   Last night I felt really disapointed in myself so this morning I went for a walk with my son and hoped back on the Optifast wagon. Funny thing is that even thought I had a lapse it has made me feel much more confident that I will make it to next Thursday OK. So maybe a little breakout is necessary to keep on track. I wouldn't recommend a triple cheese burger but maybe a moderate breakout does more good than harm in the long run.   I'm off to the pharmacy to buy more Optifast.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

I'm with the band

Small Latte Banana Smoothie Latte 1 1/2 cups potato and leek soup Water Water Water soluable multi vit. 1 1/2 cups zuccini soup   Another good day. Took my waterproof bandages off today and I was surprised at how small the uncissions are. I take the steri strips off on Thursday.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

I'm off and racing

Today is my first 'normal' day with the band. A good friend of mine is up from Sydney to help me out and she has made me a couple of yummy vegatable soups. Today I ate: Banana Smoothie Sm Skim Latte Little bit of yoghurt (few teaspoons at a time. All up less than 1/2 cup. 1 1/2 cups of potato and leek soup 1 1/2 cups of roast vegetable soup Lots of water and a soluable mulit vitamin.   I must say I did that pretty easily and wasn't really hungry at any stage. My tummy is tender and bloated but I'm getting around OK. I even went to the shops today which was probably not a great idea but I felt good.   I just watched Super Size Me - Holy Crap what a movie!!! My kids arn't going to see the inside a Maccas for a long, long time.   Tomorrow I'm going for a walk around the lake.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

I'm Banded!!!!

Well, I got home from hospital a few hours ago and while I feel pretty good now I was a total mess last night. Pain, Migrain, vomiting the works. My tummy is tender and quite swollen. I'm glad it's over. I'm on fluids for 2 weeks, then I see Dr Bowden and then puree for two weeks.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

I must be screwed in the head

There is no other explanation for it. I MUST be screwed in the head. I am totally focused on food and eating all the time. I'm trying sooooo hard to eat 1/2 cup at a time over 20 mins but I just find that the restriction is causing me to pick at food all the time. Most of the time I sit down and get through my half cup in 10 - 15 min but other times I just eat a little bit of whatever is handy - including chocolate. Today I ate a small tin of salmon and I must have eaten it too quickly because I felt a terrible intergestion pain then I bought a little bit of it back up. It wasn't a vomit so much as a regergitation. Now you would think that would have stopped me but Ohhh No.... I wne on to have some ice cream with my son and some peanut butter from the jar. I'm feeling terribly out of controle and hating myself.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Happy Bandiversary to Me!!

Today is my very first Bandiversary. And while I have not lost the huge amounts of weight some girls do in thier first year I am over the moon with my 17kg loss. 12 months ago I was a different person in the way I thought of my self and my abilities. I may be almost half way but now I can see the way forward. I can see myself at 69 kilos but a year ago it was a far off fantasy. It hasn't been what I expected either. I read all the stories on this site about the girls loosing 30 to 50 kgs in the first year and truely expected that to be me. Well, the band didnt really start working for me for a good 5 - 6 months. If you read my previous journal entries you will understand why. But you know what, who said I have to loose all my weight fast. That would be great but that's not how it happened for me. The advantage of loosing slowing is it gives your head a chance to catch up with your body. As every kg has come off so my attitude to myself has changed. I dont know if that would be possibel if I was loosing weight quickly. So what for the coming year..... Exercise!! I know I have said it many many times before but I do need to more. Weather it be dance or walking but I need to move and you know what now I'm 17kg's down I want to move. I want to dance when a good song comes on the radio and I want to walk around the lake now. I would also like a tummy tuck in the coming year. I have an apointment with a top plastic surgeon on the 8th August. Looking forward to seeing where I'm at in another 12 months. F
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

HALF WAY

There were times when I didn't think I'd make it but this morning I weighed in at 88.2kg which is a total loss of 19kg's and exactly half way to my goal of 69kg. I thought I celebrate by taking me measurements which are: Bust 105cm - down .5cm on last measure Waist 92cm - down 1cm Hips 120.5cm - down 1 cm I compared that to the measurements I took 9 days before the band and I've lost 10cm off my bust, 13.5cm off my waist and a big 17.5cm from my hips......feeling a bit smug I am....   Now my weight loss is quite noticable especially to people who haven't seen me in a while. I made a very deliberate decision to tell people the truth about my weight loss. I want everyone to know that the band is the reason I am finally able to deal with my weight problem. Who knows it may just help someone make the decision to have the band themselves. I know if I had known a successful bandster I probably would have had it much sooner.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Going Down

I know I'm the slackest journaler ever and I'm also probably the slowest looser but I'm getting there. This morning I am 92.8 which is the lowest I have been in many years. That brings my loss to a total of 15kg now. I have also taken my measurments today. They are now: Waist: 96cm Hip: 123cm Bust: 108.5cm I'll keep you posted!!   Fleur
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Getting harder no to eat.....

I really feel like I need to give something more substantial a go. I am so sick of soup. Today I had a some 'normal' food and it felt like I had intergestion so that put the brakes on me pretty quick. I haven't been going out much because I thought it would be harder to stick to the diet. That, and I have also set myself a 90 day 'no unnecessary purchases' challenge. So I have been at home working hard but I have moments of feeling quite depressed. I know it will pass but God it's really there. Maybe it is because I have removed my usual copeing tool - food. Yesterday I wanted to eat and eat but today it isn't too bad. I'm going to have to come up with somethinginspired for dinner. I did weigh myself today, even though I promised myself I would only do it on a Monday BUT it was 102kg so I'm happy but I'll be happier if I can get rid of this constipation. I had a a lovely emaio from another Brisbane girl with the band, Lara. She is amazing - she has lost 48kg since last October (6 months). She's given me her number and I'm going to meet her for a coffee. Lara also had the same doctor as well. Be nice to have a little band buddy close by.   Today I ate Optifast with Banana Skim Latte 1/2 cinnomon roll - I know but I was in town and starving Optifast with banana 1/2 cup potato & leek soup Water Water Water Medication & Soluable Multi vit.   Yesterday I ate Optfast with Banana and tinned apricots 1 1/2 cups pea soup Optifast with banana & tinned apricots 1 1/2 cups roast vegie soup Optifast with banana sm slice mushed up quiche Coffee Medication Water
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Filled At last - thank god almighty

Haven't written in my journal for a few days not... busy at work. Well my big news is that I've had a fill. 1ml and I already can feel that I'm not as hungry. The bad news is that I put on 1kg over easter taking me back up to 102. So I'm hoping fingers crossed that the fill me reverse this. Well, I guess that's what lap band is supposed to do.   Today I ate   Coffee water 1/2 cup savory mince 6 Anzac biscuits (well it is anzac day!) skim latte 1 piece of home made pizza water coffee   My Dietician trudy has given me a beginners lap band meal plan. I believe I need some structure at this stage of the game so I'm aiming to stay on the eating plan for the duration of May. I have my big work event at the end of May so I really use the weight loss.
Fleur

Fleur

1
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