All the pre-approvals, testing and clearances are done. I've been running around getting the pantry stocked, bills paid, post-surgical dietary needs stocked, laundry done - etc.
Still trying to get my mind around the no lift/push/pull over 10lbs for 4 weeks. I have two large dogs - if one of them even bumps me, I'm a goner:ohmy:!
Everyone keeps asking me if I'm scared or excited. Actually - neither. I'm so busy and it's moving so fast that I don't have time to really dwell - and when I have pondered I get myself into a low level anxiety. I'm doing this for my health and it's just a tool but all the testing ramps it up the anxiety a bit even though everything's fine. Having had cancer puts an edge on any medical testing even after all these years.
Add on trying to get used to a BiPap in five days which isn't going to be easy - here I am at my desk at midnight dodging going to bed like a child:tongue_smilie:!
Still trying to get my husband to grasp that this isn't like getting a Snap-On tool. He seems to think I'm invincible because I've bounced back from other surgeries and maybe I will, but I'm trying to prepare him for the unpleasant potentials and that if I tell him he needs to get me to an ER, it's not a debate. I think he's thinking I'm going to be whipping up a home cooked meal on Wednesday night:w00t:!
As far as the pre-surgical diet goes - I think it would've gone better if it was just limited to the two weeks prior. I've been on this for over a month. I have cheated - not too terribly. Last Friday after the surgeon cleared me, we went out for a late lunch. I had half a fish sandwich, 6 fries and a 1/4c of cole slaw and was full. It's been a struggle since. I managed two shakes today and ate a 1/4 of a chicken breast and some crackers with cheese. Now I feel gassy & guilty! (but not sleepy)
oh mushies, how i love thee!
especially you, pureed low fat cottage cheese. oh baby. ive missed you. i promise, ill never leave you again.
love,
Harli:wub:
Having anxiety has led to a number of "cardiac" incidents over the years i.e., palpatations. Coupled with a family history of heart disease, I've had echocardiograms, stress tests, Holter monitering and other than some trivial valve issues and a slightly irregular heartbeat, every cardiologist I've seen has told me I have nothing to worry about. Last Friday's pre-surgical clearance with my doc had my BP at 110/74.
Today - after the BiPap fitting, I drove an hour to meet with the pulmonlogist - for 15 minutes. When I got there my BP was 138/84 and he expressed concern. Nevertheless, my pulmonary function tests were fine - lung capacity and oxygenation well within a normal healthy range. The pulmonologist didn't even feel that my SA issues were that severe that if the BiPap didn't work for me, it wouldn't be a big deal...but the Resp Therapist told me my poor sleep quality and oxygen levels could lead to a heart attack or stroke. Apparently I shouldn't sleep on my back either. Okay - except that I have arthritis in my neck and any other position is uncomfortable, coupled the carpal tunnel which make my hands go numb when I lay on my side. I still have to wonder about the accuracy of the sleep study, when none of these issues are addressed. Beyond dealing with my weight, I have to say getting older sucks as it seems it's a juggling act of trying to balance life's responsibilities with managing health issues.
I have to admit that I was wrong - while my "Sleep Apnea" quiz indicated I wasn't likely to have SA, the actual test yielded some surprising results. I probably would've grasped the reality better if my pulmonologist had called me with the results of the initial test(2/18). Instead, I got the full picture today(plus copies of both test results) from the Lincare respitory therapist. I only had one incident of obstructive apnea, but 161 hypopneas(shallow breathing) resulting in a drop in my blood oxygen level which means that even though I get a full night's sleep, my oxygen level dips too low, so I'm not sleeping as deeply as I could.
So, I've got the BiPap and I wore it today while reading. It was okay - we'll see what happens tonight.
I have come to realize that in order to get the most out of this journey, I need to get moving - really moving. So, I joined a gym. Seriously, I JOINED A GYM! It's really is funny! Who knew! Me in a gym, and the best part is - I LIKE IT!
I walked in the first day and I am sure I looked like someone who did not belong there. After a tour of the center, and some careful instructions from the trainer who made me feel so welcome, I started on a machine. Little did I know then that this machine was going to change the way I look at exercise. This machine - the elliptical - is truly my new BFF. Don't get me wrong, I use other equipment in the gym, but the elliptical...it calls my name. It makes me stronger, it makes me believe again that this change in me is possible and is real. After struggling the first several times and managing to get through 8 minutes on level 1, I am now chugging away for 30 minutes daily at level 7, and that is after I ride the bike for 30 minutes, or before I do the 30 minute circuit workout....and sometimes, I do all three in the same visit.
One of the other good things about the gym, is that I bring a friend with me...and not only does it make the workout go that much faster, it's even more fun. I have a list of people who want to go with me - seriously, AND four of my friends have also joined the gym since going with me!
Here I am...me...the woman who has lost 55lbs since surgery, and now, I go to the gym...5 days a week. and I like it! I never ever EVER thought I would be talking about my new best friend and having it be an elliptical machine - however, this life I am leading has changed more than just how much food I can eat and what I can eat - it has literally changed ME, and changed for the better.
I read few blogs today of folks that are in the proverbial Bandster Hell. Some are eating and frustrated, some are using Weight Watchers to fill the void and others are just hungry. I do think that LapBand medical community needs to be a little more effective in helping people through this phase of the process. My take on things is they do a great job upfront with the sales pitch and the pre-op prep. I think most doctors do a good job with the operation day and the basic post-op recovery. However, there seems to be a decided gap between the operation and the restriction phase of the band process.
Which as we all know has been labeled Bandster Hell or BH for this blog. So for those of you in, or approaching BH, here is a check list to think about:
1. Avoid Consumption as Usual – it seems fairly common that once you are basically healed, many people can eat all they want and some like to test the limits of what you can eat. Needless to say this is not what we want to do. Just, assume that you can eat like the old you, but don’t do it.
2. Prepare a BH Menu – Knowing the BH is coming, plan a special menu that is healthy and helps you keep the right habits until you have restriction. I would plan it just like you were at restriction just don’t beat yourself up if the portions are bigger during this time. One person was doing Weight Watcher, some do South Beach, but whatever it is knowledge and planning are power here.
3. Focus on 5-6 Meals a Day – For me the best way to manage BH is to get some 8oz dishes with lids (I got mine at Smart and Final) then plan on eating every 3-4 hours. This keeps me focused on small meals, but allows me to have some extra healthy food.
4. Get Your Protein – Use Whey Protein to help you get enough protein. I mix mine with yogurt and blueberries, oatmeal and other foods to load up on it.
5. Focus on Exercise – This is a great time to get your exercise program going and that will help you interim weight management, and make the time when you do have restriction more productive.
6. You Are Not Failing – BH is part of winning in the long term. You are supposed to go through this part of the journey. Don’t beat yourself up. This time is available to you to prepare for the restriction phase of the process
7. You Did Not Do This For Nothing – Reading hundreds of these threads from folks who have walked through the valley of BH, all agree when you get to the other side it will be worth it for you. You did not deal with Pre-Op, spend the money, or go through surgery for nothing.
8. Embrace the Process – This is one of the stages of BH, don’t fight it, make it work for you. Focus on picking good foods, get your body in better shape with exercise and focus on the positive.
Like many of you I am trudging my way through BH. I am staying focused getting to the other side and finding the promised land of restriction.
I don't know what my problem is, but I am so hungry and can eat so much since my last fill. I thought I had pretty good restriction at 4.5cc. Got my 3rd fill on Monday which brought me to 5.25cc and I am so hungry. Ugh! :tt2:
All I can think is maybe I am being too 'careful' and eating too many soft-ish foods. So, tonight I am gonna have my DH grill some salmon and asparagus. Wish me luck that it doesn't slide down so easy. :smile2:
Oh, the other thing is that my muscles have been sore and I've been tired a lot lately. I started exercising every day over a week ago so maybe my body just really needs the food to repair my muscle? I can only hope! :thumbup:
Today, my love affair with food ended. He has always been the one constant in my life. And like any other relationship I've had, we'll probably try to make it work a few more times, before it resonates in my spirit that... it. is. indeed. OVER. Not because I want it to be, but because it HAS to be. *sigh*What once consumed almost every thought & desire...will give way to a new, enlightened way of thinking, living, and being.
Health, is my NEW man. The lover of my soul and my future.
Gone will be the days of secretly spooning in the bed with and entire bag of UTZ Sour Cream & Onion chips, or making out with my homegirl Lil' Deb *holla*. I'll have to pass on the cupcakeS, and be content with just one, on occasion - Not the 3 or 4 or 7 a week as I have done in the past.
And like any relationship when it ends, I have to look at myself in the mirror as a newly "single" woman, wipe away the tears, and acknowledge how difficult the road ahead would be without my tried & true Lover. Food has been there at the ready to comfort me through it all: the heartache, the heart break, disappointments, and even the times of celebration. But now, I have to learn to put the relationship in it's proper place: one of necessity, not over-indulgence... One of sustenance, not sabotage.
Of course, I still have to meet up with food - a more casual relationship of sorts. I just can no longer take it as my "one & only". *sigh*
It's been a long time coming. 15 years or more. It was inevitable. And no matter how I've tried to fight it, I knew that at some point in life I would have to choose. I'll take an infamous line from Samantha Jones here (Sex & The City, SHEESH!):
[Dear Food,]
"I love you...But I love ME more." *xoxo*
Yours in Health & Fabulousness,
Vixen
So I went in for my 5th fill. I got .75cc fill. Felt fine but by that night couldn't even swallow my own spit.
I went in the next day and had a .25cc defill. Felt fine and then a few days later the band tightened again had to go back in and have another .25cc defill.
Now I am at 8.75cc in a 10cc band and feel great. I think I am at my sweet spot for now.
Altogether - I am down 55 pounds as of this morning. What a wonderful feeling. Even though being overfilled was very uncomfortable - to get to the spot where I am at is great.
I can hardly wait until summer - going to the beach is going to be a totally different experience than in the past. Before people looked at me like I was a beached whale. This summer I am going to feel awesome and totally enjoy the water with my boys.
Thank you Slimband - I Love My Band.:thumbup:
So I am now 10 days out and each day is a new adventure. I am having a lot of real pain in my lower stomach, at first I felt really hungry, I am still on liquid diet for 4 more days :tt2:. I am drinking protein shakes and a lot of water. I feel no restriction now. The hunger turned to pain about 1 hour ago. Does anyone know what the heck this is? :thumbup:
I had my 3rd post surgical appointment yesterday, one week shy of 4 months banded. I was glad to finally be seeing the doctor because I've had some digestive issues since my last fill -- vomiting, sliming, discomfort...you name it. And then, about a week ago, I felt a lump in my abdomen, just inside my hip bone. It was tender to the touch and seemed to move when I changed position. I thought maybe it was a hernia I'd never noticed because of all the fat on my gut before but definitely wanted to have it checked out.
So, I'm sitting in the exam room waiting for the doctor and reading the informative poster about the digestive system which, as we know, ends in the colon and rectum. How delightful to read the symptoms of colo-rectal cancer while I've got a lump I'm worried about. Here's my thought process: "Let's see, hmmm, change in bowel habits - check, pain or tenderness in the abdomen - check, other TMI symptoms - check, check, check.... OMG, I HAVE COLON CANCER! Great! Isn't this just ironic that here I am, finally losing weight so I can live a healthier life and now I'm going to die from colon cancer anyway. I shouldn't have smoked. I shouldn't have drunk too much. I shouldn't have had a high fat diet. I shouldn't have.....oh, here comes the doctor."
So, when the doctor asks me how I am, I blurt out, "I have a lump in my abdomen and at first I thought it might be a hernia but after reading THAT, I'm a little worried it's colon cancer." He sort of laughs and says, "If you had colon cancer and could feel a lump through your stomach, you'd be f'n dead already." Well, I do like him for being blunt. So, he feels around and says it's a hematoma and asks if I had an injection recently. I did not and, I can't think of any incident where I got poked or fell on something..... So, chalk it up to all the swimming I did in Mexico - probably a small tear in my muscle. Phew. Thank goodness these hypochondria moments don't last too long.
So, now that I know I'm not going to die (from this particular ailment), I mention that I might need a slight unfill because I'm concerned I'm not getting enough food since the last fill on 1/27. I've been trying to do about 1/2 cup of food but find I get very full just at a little over 1/4 cup down and begin to feel uncomfortable, get slimy and..as I mentioned above, vomit. The doctor says I don't need an unfill and that 2 ounces of solid food at a sitting is just about right. So, no fill, no unfill.
But, you know, I really miss eating even though I take longer to do it now and can eat almost anything - just not much of it. I miss everything about cleaning my plate, the feel of the food in my mouth, having more than one course.....dessert!
Today I went to the cafeteria to get some lunch. I got a small soup (less than half filled) and put 1 hard boiled egg, one slice of cucumber and a few carrot shreds in the smallest salad container they had. When I took it to the cashier, it wouldn't weigh -- it was too light for the scale so she charged me for a cookie (!!!) -- all of $.50. I got a packet of mayo and made myself a little egg salad and had some on a saltine. It tasted good. I could have licked the container but I was too full. I couldn't even eat the 2nd saltine.
I signed up for this knowing the band was a tool and that I had to do the heavy lifting. It's working, I'm working. I'm vomiting, it's working. I'm sliming, it's working. I've lost 58 lbs, it's working. It's working, it's working.
Well, I am three days Post Op now. I feel much better since surgery. The pain and vomiting has all went away. I have very minor burning around my incisions when I bend down or sit down too low in a chair. Nothing at all bad. It is easy to manage.
I am drinking protein shakes, chicken broth, and lots of water through the day. I have also had sugar free Jell-O. It feels good to get the digestion process started again.
Today, I was able to keep a dentist appointment for a cleaning and it felt good to get out of the house. I still tire a little easily, but I guess that is just because I have not been sleeping regularly. I like my naps at home whenever I feel like it.
I am thinking about going to see a movie tomorrow if I feel well enough. I like walking and moving. Its not much exercise, but the short walks around the block have really made me feel better. Just leaving the house felt great!
I have had major cravings lately for Mexican food. I would really like to have some salsa or something else spicy. On a side note, I have also been dreaming about eating this stuff. My sister called and woke me up yesterday and I told her I was dreaming about eating breakfast steak quesadillas with salsa and sour cream. I laughed about it, but it was a good dream. Very vivid and detailed. My stomach was really growling long afterwards.
Here is the dish, I am a binge eater, so I really need to be careful to not try and eat something that could hurt my overall band goals. I am embarrassed to admit it, but part of me would love to see what I could get away with right now since I am so hungry, but I will not give in and do something so stupid. I hate that about myself, but I would love to eat a large amount right now if I could.
I will return to work Wednesday if my doctor approves on Tuesday. I figure I will be very comfortable by then and mostly recovered. I am eager to get to the next stage of my diet, as I am getting tired of broth and protein shakes. I am told that after my first fill, things will get more interesting as far as the "full" feeling goes. I am counting on that to help with my binge cravings later.
Thanks for all the comments and support. It has helped.
Appreciatively,
-Chris
No one likes the middle seat on airlines. However, for years I have watched people eye me with disdain for fear that I will be the person in the middle seat next to them. In many ways I do feel for them, when a guy pushing 400 lbs, looks at them and says, sorry dude, that seat is me. They know this is going to be an uncomfortable flight for everyone. I remember so many times walking down the isle of coach seating seeing people praying that I walked past them, I could hear the expulsion of the breath they were holding when they saw me coming and then move past them. As I said I don’t always blame them, some days I did, it pissed me off, and it was a bit humiliating at the same time.
As I got on the plane last night, I thought about Southwest Airlines and them asking people to buy two tickets or kicking people off for taking up to much room. However, on my most recent flight I got stuck in the middle seat and while it will never be comfortable, it was far more manageable. I did not get kicked of the plane and it was not a CNN story for which I am very grateful. Much like going to the dentist, the middle seat will never be fun, but it is significantly easier.
I can't believe it, I am now 398 lbs!
I started my pre-op diet last Dec. 26 at 471 lbs, got banded Jan. 11, and since then i have lost 73 lbs.
I definitely feel the change. I'm now wearing a completely different set of clothes as compared to what I was wearing last January. Good thing I didn't throw away all my old clothes. I'm now wearing shirts and pants which I last wore 9 years ago. From wearing 6XL shirts, I now wear 4XL.
Here are my progress pix so far:
I've got a looooong way to go, but I'm very happy with what I have accomplished so far.
Ok so it was a bit of an anti climax but still good.
I had blood pressure, weight, and MRSA tests done by a lovely nurse called Lorna. She really made me feel comfortable.
The I had an ECG and some blood tests. And I was home in an hour! No photos, phew. No dietician, no talk about surgery.
I have to say once I saw the surgeon last August it has pretty quick and to the point. No great discussions. I was expecting lots of information and guidence. Thank heavens for LapBandTalk and everyones willingness to share. Without it I think I would have been totally unprepared.
I have followed the restricted food diet for 4 days and gained 1.5 lb. I cant dwell on that point because I feel like giving up. I have, hand on heart not eaten anything that wasnt weighed and on the list so how I gained weight I dont know. But I am now switching to the milk only diet for the next 18 days. That has surely got to work?????
I am under no illusion that it will be easy but now I have had the pre op I feel like its the final countdown and I have to make the effort.
I am so looking forward to life with the band. :thumbup::thumbup::tt2::thumbup::smile2:
Ok so I go in a week and a half for my second weigh in and I am down 4 lbs!!! Which I know seems like it should be great news but its not!! I am right on the bubble for being at a 40 BMI ( which is what I must be to be approved for surgery ) and if I have it figured out right I can only lose 10lbs in the 6 months or else......no surgery.
WTC!! I can't believe I am actually mad because I am losing wt. lol It's a first for me. My DH has decided I might just be crazy with all the ranting I have been doing in the last few days. :tt2:
On another note I was sure my Dr was going to have my appts made for me by now but I haven't heard anything from the office. I'm not really sure how long it takes to get in to see a nutritionist or psych or what the appt is all about but I am really ready to check those two things off my list. I'm also hoping that with the kids ball season starting it will help the time pass faster!!!:thumbup:
i went to see my surgeon today for a surprise visit. one of my incisions had a bit of discharge and my post incision is a little red and starting to bruise. my surgeon looked it over, said its all normal, cleaned the weeping incision and put new tape on it.
on the ride home, i felt a sneeze coming on so i placed my hands on my belly and braced for it. unfortunately, it wasnt enough. because i felt an incredibly sharp pain followed by an all day long dull ache. i have no idea whats wrong. do i have a hernia now? did i flip my port? was the pain just caused by the port bouncing or something when i sneezed? i have no idea.
im worried but i dont want to bug my surgeon a second day in a row without an appointment. i hope the pain will be gone tomorrow. :tt2:
liquids are going own easy as anything. some mushies are going down fine as well. some mushies tend to stick a bit but they still go down after a minute or so. im making progress. im just worried about this pain. :smile2: i hope i didnt mess things up somehow! :thumbup:
Okay since I last blogged I was getting back from being in terrible pain and the emergency room from the pain pump that was in me. Now that it has been resolved I got sick about a 2 weeks ago and I had it coming out both ends. I think there was a slight bug going around here where I live cause everyone I work with has been sick. I moved out of my parents house on the 12th of Feb. and it has been great since. I live on the third floor now and I guess the upside is I get good leg exercise the bad part i'm out of breath when I get to the top. lol What can you do right? So I have been eating more than I am supposed to because I feel no restriction and I have been feeling hungry I try not to but I mean I can't starve. So I went to get my fill yesterday my 10cc band to a 6.4 cc. I am feeling a bit restriction I am on fluids right now so I haven't eaten any actual food yet so we will see a few days from now how it is. On another note I haven't been exercising too much besides up and down the stairs here and moving so I signed up for a taekwondo class and had my first class today. I plan to do twice a week. That is probably all I can handle it is intense and great workout. Plus you learn self defense what more do you need right. It's an hour class and the most I have worked out in a few years. So I am proud to say they kicked my ass in that class. But I made it through the whole thing without passing out. Thanks for reading. Goodnight.
Hi Everyone!
I too am in the prelim stages of my banding.
Here's my journey so far....
I started to have blood pressure issues about a year ago so was put on meds. Swelling from water in feet and ankles, etc... Then in Oct breathing issues (due in part to my size) and finally went to my dr in Dec. At that time I discussed my weight and options with her. By Jan, I had the approval from BCBS hmo IL to see a lapband dr for a consult. I was given Rush and Loyola for my options. Loyola is 2 and a half hours away, and Rush is even further. I chose Dr Sarker at Loyola.
I had my first appointment with her Jan 15. She gave me the ever dreaded list of things to do... To date, I have everything done. I had the sleep study done earlier this week and they now want me to go for another sleep study to be set up for a cpap. Without the cpap, I was told the surgery can't be done... I talked to Gayle today at Dr Sarkers office and she told me that she is waiting for the sleep study and the psych eval and then my file will be given to Dr Sarker for review... After she looks at it and approves, then Marva(??) will send to BCBC hmo IL for final approval.... So, honestly things are moving rather quickly for me... I just hope they continue that way. Once the ins co gives the final approval, then I will see her one more time before surgery (I think).
The other night when I had my sleep study, I was laying there miserable. I couldnt sleep with all them stupid wires, and I felt so trapped so I was laying there thinking and second guessing myself and was wondering why I was doing this. It actually scared the crap out of me and is making me rethink things.
I need a serious support system and I dont have one yet!! I have only told my significant other, my mom and my friend in CO (who was also banded in Oct and to date she has lost 52 lbs) about this. I dont want everyone to know my business, so I dont talk to my friends or close coworkers about it. I also have 2 kids (10 and 17) that do not know Im considering it.. I feel like I am being sneaky all the time, and I hate it!
Can someone help bring me out of this slump I'm in?? I need some encouragement. I seriously feel that I'm a food addict and will eat myself to death if I dont go thru with it.
so today was a bad day a real bad day...im very disappointed in myself and still feel defeated. i want this so bad and then 1 family emergency and it all goes to hell. the damn diet is making my stomach hurt and the dr said that it could be bc of not enough fiber so they want me to take some benfiber to see if the pain goes away. if not then i have to go back to the doctor. then i opened the email and found out that my surgery is scheduled for 3/11 at 11:30 with pre opt on 3/8. i just need to refocus and make it through the next week. my surgery is next week and i am nervous and scared. but excited at the same time. i just hope that i didnt fuck everything up. im praying that tomorrow is a better day. im glad that my husband is ok and going to make it. now to make it through 1 day at a time....
I'm ready for Friday. Very ready for Friday. My clinic "went live" with a new computer system yesterday and holy smokes batman, it sucks! So much for efficiency! The crankiness is making us all more cranky. I tossed and turned all night with dreams of the person in charge of the big switch last night (and no, not THOSE kind of dreams, she's not my type). Forget a cookie, I want a margarita!
One of my least favorite things about Arkansas is that I've yet to find a good margarita up here, Texas spoiled me I suppose.
On a lighter note, my recently retired parents fly off to Costa Rica tomorrow. I am very excited for them and so very glad that they've planned for their retirement and can afford to go do things like this. I am, however, REALLY FREAKING JEALOUS, but my turn will come some day too (I hope!). I have inherited their adorable and really spoiled rotten dogs for the next 2 weeks so keep your fingers crossed the weather holds and we can all get out in the evenings for a walk. Now it's time to go snuggle under the covers with the 2 really spoiled dogs who also think they belong under the covers...at least I can keep the heat turned way down while they're here!
Hope you are all having a great week!
I went to see my surgeon Monday 3/1. He was great, he answered all my questions. I'm just playing the waiting game now waiting on insurance approval. I started exercising on my lunch break basically using the treadmill or walking for 15 mins. I have started doing the whole last meal thing for lunch I say this is the last time I will have onion rings or any other fried food. Oh well I'm trying to post some pics but its not working any ideas will help.
I'm literally almost crying reading this. Mostly because I'mon this pre-op diet and these last two days have been difficult... but also because I needed this! Thank you! Congrats! And a BIG congrats on quitting smoking a second time! It was hard enough to do it once... So - when I say BIG congrats... I mean BIIIIIG congrats! ❤️
Was sind last resting-place besten Gewinnchancen in einem Casino? "Einarmige Banditen"
Einarmige Banditen
Casinos werden in erster Linie mit Roulette und Poker in Verbindung gebracht, aber Statistiken zeigen, dass 61 % der Besucher von Spielhallen ihre Zeit damit verbringen, einarmige Banditen zu spielen (Daten von 2013 von der American Gaming Association). Perish Regeln der Spielautomaten sind sehr einfach, und der niedrige Mindesteinsatz macht sie auch fur decease armsten Spieler zuganglich.