Am I Going To Die? and Salad for the price of a cookie.

I had my 3rd post surgical appointment yesterday, one week shy of 4 months banded. I was glad to finally be seeing the doctor because I've had some digestive issues since my last fill -- vomiting, sliming, discomfort...you name it. And then, about a week ago, I felt a lump in my abdomen, just inside my hip bone. It was tender to the touch and seemed to move when I changed position. I thought maybe it was a hernia I'd never noticed because of all the fat on my gut before but definitely wanted to have it checked out.

So, I'm sitting in the exam room waiting for the doctor and reading the informative poster about the digestive system which, as we know, ends in the colon and rectum. How delightful to read the symptoms of colo-rectal cancer while I've got a lump I'm worried about. Here's my thought process: "Let's see, hmmm, change in bowel habits - check, pain or tenderness in the abdomen - check, other TMI symptoms - check, check, check.... OMG, I HAVE COLON CANCER! Great! Isn't this just ironic that here I am, finally losing weight so I can live a healthier life and now I'm going to die from colon cancer anyway. I shouldn't have smoked. I shouldn't have drunk too much. I shouldn't have had a high fat diet. I shouldn't have.....oh, here comes the doctor."

So, when the doctor asks me how I am, I blurt out, "I have a lump in my abdomen and at first I thought it might be a hernia but after reading THAT, I'm a little worried it's colon cancer." He sort of laughs and says, "If you had colon cancer and could feel a lump through your stomach, you'd be f'n dead already." Well, I do like him for being blunt. So, he feels around and says it's a hematoma and asks if I had an injection recently. I did not and, I can't think of any incident where I got poked or fell on something..... So, chalk it up to all the swimming I did in Mexico - probably a small tear in my muscle. Phew. Thank goodness these hypochondria moments don't last too long.

So, now that I know I'm not going to die (from this particular ailment), I mention that I might need a slight unfill because I'm concerned I'm not getting enough food since the last fill on 1/27. I've been trying to do about 1/2 cup of food but find I get very full just at a little over 1/4 cup down and begin to feel uncomfortable, get slimy and..as I mentioned above, vomit. The doctor says I don't need an unfill and that 2 ounces of solid food at a sitting is just about right. So, no fill, no unfill.

But, you know, I really miss eating even though I take longer to do it now and can eat almost anything - just not much of it. I miss everything about cleaning my plate, the feel of the food in my mouth, having more than one course.....dessert!

Today I went to the cafeteria to get some lunch. I got a small soup (less than half filled) and put 1 hard boiled egg, one slice of cucumber and a few carrot shreds in the smallest salad container they had. When I took it to the cashier, it wouldn't weigh -- it was too light for the scale so she charged me for a cookie (!!!) -- all of $.50. I got a packet of mayo and made myself a little egg salad and had some on a saltine. It tasted good. I could have licked the container but I was too full. I couldn't even eat the 2nd saltine.

I signed up for this knowing the band was a tool and that I had to do the heavy lifting. It's working, I'm working. I'm vomiting, it's working. I'm sliming, it's working. I've lost 58 lbs, it's working. It's working, it's working.

LOL - I love your sense of humor - thanks for sharing! I could so totally relate to everything - even though I'm pre-op (T-8 days and counting!)

Hope you're feeling better and have this whole vomiting thing under control. By the way - what on earth is sliming??? It sounds really gross!

Sliming is indeed gross. When something gets stuck in the stoma, or goes down wrong, or you eat too much, your body produces a very viscous clear mucus to help move things along. If it doesn't push the food through though, the slime builds up and eventually comes out. I've been amazed at the volume of slime as well as how easily it comes out my nose too! Luckily, it slides right down the sink. LOL

Haven't gotten that far yet to experience sliming. Sounds horrible, but oh well. We all signed up for the healthy end result, right? I suppose even though I am a bit scared about these experiences that are coming, I know that it is going to keep me alive longer. I like the idea of cheap meals. Thanks for sharing. :biggrin:

I have had slimming but not through my nose..hope i dont have to feel/see that.

I am having my 3rd fill at the end of the month. right now i have ZERO restriction and i can eat well over 1 cup of food before i stop myself...i am also snaking.

I hope that with my next fill i get closet to my "sweet spot" with out the slimming and vomiting.

I can totally relate with "missing food"

Good luck and keep it up!!