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Just NOT seeing it!



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I have been getting alot of comments about how great I look. I enjoy the comments and they encourage me to keep on keeping on....but....when I look in the mirror I still see the 301lb woman I was just a few months ago. I can tell that my bras are bigger and some of my clothes are looser, but I can't look at myself and see any change! Do any of you have the same problem?:tongue2:

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I understand where you are coming from. It is hard for us to see ourselves any different from that overweight person we perceive ourselves to be. This is despite the fact that all the evidence does point to the fact that we are losing weight and getting healthier.

Did you take any pictures of yourself before your surgery? If so, take one of you now and post them side by side. I bet you will then definitely be able to tell the difference.

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The pictures are a good idea. Here's another one. I kept one outfit that fit me well at 284 pounds. Now, at 206, I sometimes find I don't see the thinner me in the mirror. I take out that outfit which now leaves me swimming in fabric and it reminds me just how far I've come.

We, as humans, tend to be more critical of ourselves than others. You look at your reflection and you see the things you don't like and that keeps you from seeing the improvements you are making daily.

Cut yourself a little slack. Buy yourself a small treat as a reward for starting the journey. I suggest jewelry but, of course, that's my new weakness, LOL. Set another goal, you pick, at which time you will reward yourself again. The jewelry depends on your budget, but the fact that it's something you wanted makes it special.

Soon, it will be hard not to see the new you coming out of the pounds you're carrying now. Keep the faith!

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I understand where you are coming from. It is hard for us to see ourselves any different from that overweight person we perceive ourselves to be. This is despite the fact that all the evidence does point to the fact that we are losing weight and getting healthier.

Did you take any pictures of yourself before your surgery? If so, take one of you now and post them side by side. I bet you will then definitely be able to tell the difference.

This is the best idea. This is exactly what I had to do to see it. I am down 80 pounds and couldn’t see it until a couple weeks ago. I started at 24W and currently wear size 16. It was obvious to everyone around me but I just couldn’t see it. So I got out some old pics of me from before surgery (they were hard to find, I was always hiding behind people) and compared them side by side to some from a week ago. I thought to myself…. Wow what a difference. I also looked at some pics my husband took and had to take a second and third look because I did not recognize myself. It was great. Hope you get the same experience. I have been trying to take a pic of myself every 2 months and compare. Keep lookin and you will notice a difference too!

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Also keep in mind that the heavier you are the more weight you need to lose to see an appreciable difference. The last 10 lbs I lost were much more visible (and I got more comments) than the first 40 lbs.

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Was 280, now at goal.

I hope you experience what I did one day.

In a clothing store, large mirrored wall, didn't recognize myself. Actually said 'excuse me' to my own reflection in the mirror.

But later smiled, thinking 'I look pretty guuuud!'.

True story!

I am 3+ years out now and my brain has udjusted for the most part. Still sometimes I see a photo and am amazed that I am not still 280 pounds.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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