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Your support person,, supportive or controlling??



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The Bariatric center I am going to go through has a requirement that you need a specific support person.. My sister and a close friend both went to the seminar with me, and I have a husband also.. My sister immediately started naming off all the things I was going to have to change before we even left the building, one being junk food in the house.. which I can't afford, and can't and haven't eaten for more then two years, along with other comments.. My friend called me 2 days after the seminar to tell me she wasn't going through with it because her friend was in the hospital with an ulcer and had to have the band removed... Her friend never quit smoking even after she was aware of the ulcer, and never followed what the doctor told her from the beginning..

Then there is my husband,, I explained to him what the doctors are requiring and that if he wasn't up for it to tell me now.. His biggest concern with this is hes afraid I will get angry if I can't eat what I want to eat??? what?? He said, well yeah, I'll do what you need me to, and in the same sentence started instructing me on nutrition.. :blush: (from the man who eats all his daily calories between 6pm and 11 pm) This irritated me and made me laugh at the same time... "I said support, I have a nutritionist and a nagging concience", listening, exercising with me, bringing home fruit instead of icecream, going for a walk,, arghhhh.............. I don't know if he can get it together for me, and my only other option is someone who has their own stuff going on..

Any suggestions on how to make loved ones understand what you need from them?? I'm beginning to think my 11 yr old daughter is my best option!!

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My Dad just wanted to let me know that I needed to do more exercising, that walking wasnt enough or I would have flabby skin (which I will anyway) if I lose a lot of weight.

My parents havent a clue how to be supportive. If I needed to find an actual person who is really supportive, Id be hard pressed.

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Well, it's been 6 months for me. My sister who was against it is now cool with it. My brother who is planning to have it done gets upset if I PB when he's around (doesn't happen often, but it does happen), DH still suggests sandwhich and burger places when we are trying to decide where to eat - he keeps forgetting. He's supportive in his own way, but before surgery, he kept saying he thought it was great "if it works". Of course, now he's a believer but still can't seem to remember that I can't have bread or carbonation.

I'm thinking the 11 year old could be an asset. If you need a grown up, I would suggest going on to the area on here that is divided by state and find someone in your hometown who has already had the surgery. Maybe even someone from the seminar.

I met at friend at mine and we've supported each other all the way. She had her surgery in Oct 07 because she was cash payment. I had to fight the insurance company first and didn't get mine until Jan 08. That gave me several months to ask her every nitty gritty detail about her experience. It was invaluable to me. I also email with several folks that I've met on here and we support each other every day with emails. I've even run into a couple of them in my own doctor's office, imagine that!

Best of luck to you and feel free to PM me anytime if you would like to chat.

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