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How to find a new and much better doctor



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So my primary care physician is a very nice lady in her late 50's or early 60's. I have been going to her for many years and she's wonderfully kind and supportive about just about everything under the sun except my struggles with weight loss.

For years she has given me bogus advice. Once she sent me to this super-crunchy-granola nutritionist friend of hers that made me answer a 10-page survey about my poop and pooping habits. Then tried to tell me I was 80 lbs overweight because my gut flora was all out of whack and all I needed was hundreds of dollars of her special-order supplements each month.

Thanks but no thanks.

Then my doctor recommended going to Curves. While I'm sure that is a fabulous suggestion for many sedentary fat people, I am and have been for several years a regular runner. Periodically I get involved in some other kind of activity too-- flag football league with coworkers, a couple months of boot camp, lifting weights at the gym, etc. In other words, her recommending that joining a gym is my solution came across as kind of insulting. I kinda have that angle covered.

For years I have begged her to prescribe me medications to help me lose weight, to no avail. She is, for a standard-issue medical doctor, awful conservative when it comes to such things. She'd never agree, for example, to Xenical or Meridien or anything like that for me. I knew she'd never, ever countenance the thought of recommending a lap band for me either, but I went and got one in spite of that (in Mexico, on my own dime).

She got really, really judgy when I went to see her in December for my regular "well woman" exam and told her about the lap band. I expected it but was still kind of hurt by it.

In any case, I think it is time for me to move on and find a better doctor. One that will be a little more understanding than she is, and possibly one that will explore the possibility of some kind of appetite suppressant medication for me, at the very least. Any ideas of how to perform a search for someone like that?

I live in Atlanta, so if there are any Atlanta-area folks that have a fantastic doctor they'd like to recommend, I'm all ears.

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I would begin by asking your friends and/or co-workers for recommendations. Honestly, I live in Atlanta, and think we have some of the best primary care doctors here, but medical weight loss is still a pretty new area for them. What you need is a caring and open-minded physician. You may need a Bariatric Specialist for a weight loss prescription, but a good primary care doctor will help you find one, and work with them to help monitor your weight loss.

My primary care doctor had been telling me for years to lose weight. he gave me the AMA dietary guidelines, told be to try South Beach...all very general things. When I told him I decided to get the lap-band surgery, he was very supportive. He gave me my pre-op clearance, and told me to check in with him in 3 months for bloodwork, so we could re-check a few of my levels, and make any necessary medication changes (cholesterol RX and acid reflux Rx). I felt like he was working with me, not humoring me.

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i've been "obese" since i was 8 years old. Other than the pediatrician I had at that age, NONE of my PCPs have ever told me to lose weight. i think that's a bad thing.

if you think for one second that your doc is judging you, get a new one! shop around. set up appts for consults. don't settle.

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      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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