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Self Sabotage-Anyone else



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I had my surgery on Jan 15th 2008. I am now on soft foods. Although, I did liquids very well. I cheated on mushy foods the second week. I'm so scared my self sabotage will defeat the purpose. I need support!!! I need encouragement!!!! Any suggestions from anyone out there?

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I had my surgery on an 16th and I am worried about the same thing. I was doing really well and was not very hungry but I guess my swelling has gone down because I'm hungry all the time. I want to eat normal food so bad. I cheated last night and now I feel horrible about myself. I wish I had words of encouragement for you but I'm having a hard time myself. We just need to get back on track and remember how it will be all worth it for the end result!

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To both of you: Your pouches need time to heal--the digestive processes are very hard on them and you could cause slippage.

Do NOT deviate from what your surgeon / Bariatric Center requires of you. This is only for such a short time and you have the rest of your lives to eat solid food!

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I wish you both all the luck. I wish I could be in the same boat oddly, as I'm still waiting for approval. LOL.

And I just know I'll probably be like you as well and want to cheat or cheat alltogether... but, don't hate yourself for it or get down on yourself. Just tell yourself, "i went through all this and got this surgery so I have to do it right". But, we are food addicts and so it's hard not to want to. But, I bet it will pass once you can get on more solid foods, so, just think about that day.. the mushies are only temporary.. Big hugs and good luck.:tongue:

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To piggy back on the other comments.

Put that behavior behind you and do as you are told. You have the rest of your life to eat solid foods. This is just a small window of time. Get some perspective on the situation.

And chances are you are fine. Worrying about goofing isn't going to make it better, but behaving right will keep you from causing yourself more stress...worrying stress AND stress on my stomach.

Good luck.

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Beyond the needing to follow the post surgery diet, I know that I continue to explore my attitude towards food.

food is just food and my choosing to eat certain foods is not "cheating", it is just a choice. Almost everyone in this world chooses to eat higher calorie, higher fat foods at times- the difference is that obese people tend to choose them more often and in higher quantities (hence our being here).

I don't think it is realistic or hopeful for me to say I will never eat chips or sausage or pizza again (I know that it isn't true). Where I have always failed in the past is my "all or nothing" attitude. In the past, I have either been "all involved" in the current diet or, once I had cheated I was "all uninvolved" in the current diet, reverting back to eating anything I wanted. The panic and disgust of the "cheat" was all encompassing and I just gave up, time and time again. That hasn't worked for me, so I have to change it.

The way I am trying to see it - I will make healthy choices as I often as I can (aim for 80%), I will journal everything I eat (so I am really aware of my choices), and if I really want something, I will have it, but be very conscious of my decision (am I really actually hungry?) to eat it as well as the quantities I am having. For me, this journey is about being mindful and purposeful in all my decisions around food, something I lost sight of before (or maybe I never did have that sight).

If you want to have a successful journey, you need to look at your past behaviour and look at ways that you can interrupt your unhealthy cycles, or you can choose to eat your way around the band.

I have been losing weight for 6 months now (4 months banded) and this is the first time, EVER, that I have lasted this long. And guess what, I am as confident today that I can be successful as I was at the begining of this journey. :tongue:

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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