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Need info for my dad--please help



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Hi. found your group by hunting around on the web. My father is 67, about 150 lbs. overweight, takes insulin for type 2 diabetes (3 or 4 yrs. now) , bad allergy athsma (aquired 10 yrs. ago) ,and has every problem that goes along with all this. He had to take early retirement for the athsma and now is so unhealthy my daughter (9) is afraid he's going to die, as are we. Going to the mailbox gets him winded. Anyway, he's a control freak and is so afraid that if he gets this surgery he will be conceding defeat to overeating. His main question is this, however: If he were to get this lap band procedure and the nutritional intake is so greatly diminished, where would the energy come from? I read some people need several adjustments and was thinking those are made as a person loses weight so they're not put right into starvation mode. Is that right? He thinks if he has the procedure and loses 40 or 50 lbs. he still wouldn't be able to ride a bike, etc. cuz he would have so little food in his body to provide nutrition. Any comments would be appreciated. Also, he lives in North Dallas. Any reccomendations on Drs. would be great. I know he would never go to a seminar. Thanks!

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I can't answer your question as in a long term answer, I can just tell you how I feel right now. I had surgery on Jan 7, 2008, so I'm almost 3 weeks out. I feel great. My energy level is much higher than it was pre-surgery, I've lost 20 pounds. I can eat great. I do have to diet, I am hungry most of the time. I'm trying to keep my calories from 1000-1200 per day. Thats plenty to keep your energy up. I even felt good when I was only getting about 400-500 a day though. I think that your father's energy level after surgery is the least of his concerns!

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Congrats! Ok, so what should be the most of his concerns? Is there anyone out there who has had there athsma symptoms go away as a result of this surgery??

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With a band properly adjusted you are not eating so little that you have no energy. You are not starving; you are simply not eating so much that your body is storing the extra calories as fat. My husband is 53 and was banded in October. He just walked in from his bike ride. He rides about 4 times a day for a total of a couple hours a day.

Age 67 is certainly old enough to figure out that he probably isn't going to lost weight on his own. If he were, he would have done it years ago.

There was a study that just came out about diabetes and weight loss surgery, showing how effective it was to control diabetes.

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I should clarify one thing. The reason why I'm hungry all the time is I haven't had an adjustment yet. If I were you I would research the band (if you haven't already) and see how it works and such. I will have an adjustment on Feb 5 and I shouldn't be as hungry then.

Oh and the problem with the seminar. My doc and the others in the area, will not let you even get an appt until you have gone to a seminar.

One of the secondary reasons that I got my band was to encourage my father to do it also. I have an aunt that had gastric bypass and has had a very rough time. Watching her struggle with that has definately turned him against a bypass, but I would still like to make an impression on him with my success and hope that he will consider doing it also.

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I cycle long distances pretty regularly.

I am not one who has my band adjusted super tightly...but it's reasonable to assume he'll be able to eat between 1000-1500 calories a day. He probably burns 2000-2500...that's how one loses the weight, the differences between the two. However, there's plenty of stored energy in his body if he is 150 overweight.

I do eat more on the days I exercise heavily, but that's a few hundred calories more, not a thousand more.

Good luck to you and your family.

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With just the little bit of weight I have lost, I'm MUCH less short of breath. I have asthma too but I think it's the extra weight now that causes the breathing problems, not the asthma. I still get SOB but it'smuch better than it was and I anticipate it will continue to improve. Does he have internet access? Hook him up with us if he does.

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My answers are below in blue. Having read your post, your father doesn't understand how the body works, or how the band works (this one being understandable), and is letting a lot of "urban legends" steer him away from something that just might work for him. See below.

Anyway, he's a control freak and is so afraid that if he gets this surgery he will be conceding defeat to overeating. Many, many obese people are control freaks. Tends to come with the territory. But - surely having surgery doesn't concede a greater amount of defeat than death does it? His main question is this, however: If he were to get this lap band procedure and the nutritional intake is so greatly diminished, where would the energy come from? In the beginning, from breaking down the fat stores. That's how weightloss works. Your body doesn't get enough of what it wants, so it breaks something down to get it. First it reaches for muscle, then it reaches for fat. Later on as fat stores are depleted, chances are he will hit a sort of equilibrium (we call this maintenance) where he's able to eat an amount that allows him to maintain his weight with proper lifestyle (right eating, exercise, etc.) I read some people need several adjustments and was thinking those are made as a person loses weight so they're not put right into starvation mode. Starvation mode is a myth. If there were starvation mode, no one would ever starve to death. :rolleyes2: Tell him he doesn't need to worry about "starvation mode". If he were to get anywhere close to realizing it, he'd have to be down to like 5% body fat (severe lean athletes, like bodybuilders, are probably around 8% - 10%, give or take a bit, so we're talking an extreme...which if he's MO, probably isn't going to happen). Nor should it. People need several adjustments for several reasons. For one, you don't want to go from normal to restricted overnight. THere's a behavioral change and a body awareness that needs to be built. Plus your body needs time to heal from the operation. There's also a very fine line between "not tight enough," "just right," and "too tight". In my case, that difference is a little less than one drop of saline. You don't want to be too tight, and you don't want to be too loose, you want to be "just right" -- so you have to play with it a bit and find that perfect spot. Get a fill, need less or more? Get another fill or an unfill accordingly. Still need a fill? Get another one. Too tight now? Lost weight and too loose? Etc. Is that right? No. See previous answer. :angry: He thinks if he has the procedure and loses 40 or 50 lbs. he still wouldn't be able to ride a bike, etc. cuz he would have so little food in his body to provide nutrition. Completely false. For one, no surgeon would let their patient eat so little that they were weak and couldn't function, and honestly, none of us are going to be in that boat. Your body's metabolism adjusts to your intake. As long as your father was eating something, and had fat on his body, being so weak he couldn't function isn't going to happen. Any comments would be appreciated. Also, he lives in North Dallas. Any reccomendations on Drs. would be great. I know he would never go to a seminar. Thanks! Sorry, can't help you here, but check our Texas area.
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At 67 years old and 150 lbs overweight, I think he should be ready to wave the white flag that he's already defeated about controling his weight on his own. Is he going to wait until he's 75 to say he's defeated by food?

Right after surgery he will maintain his body's nutritional needs with Protein drinks and most likely he will actually have better nourishment than he does now. I doubt that he's maintaining an extra 150 pounds by eating healthy food. Later, he'll maintain energy by eating healthy foods in "normal" portions.

And about riding a bike... can he ride one now? Probably not, so what's the difference? Difference is,he might be able to lower his need for the meds he's on now and there is a good chance his asthma would improve.

Sounds to me like he's just not ready to give up his best friend,food.

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I have to 100% agree with Wheetsin on this one:

But - surely having surgery doesn't concede a greater amount of defeat than death does it?

He definitely needs to decide what's more important, his pride or his life.

As to the "weak" comment. I'm moving around a whole heck of a lot more now since the surgery than I was before and I feel fantastic. I'm eating A LOT less than I used to before surgery, too. I had issues with hypoglycemia before the surgery. Meaning that I could eat and less than 2 hours later, I could be falling down and feeling like I hadn't eaten in ages. I don't experience anywhere near the degree of hypoglycemia that I used to. Part of that may have to do with eating more quality foods than I was before, but also not having the hunger signals helps.

And really, is he so athletic right now that trying to lose some lbs by eating less is going to dent his routine? By losing weight, it'll be SO much easier to move around and he'll actually LIKE moving around more.

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    • LeighaTR

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      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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